Till Someone Comes Along Chapter 8. Don't own SM or SLY. Please R&R.

Boredom...it kills.

"I'm only doing this once, you hear me? One time." I said.

"All right, I know, now pick something!" Minako cried, exasperated. "I'm on a deadline."

"Okay. Okay. Okay." I said, taking deep breaths and trying to think. I started laughing. "What if I screw up?"

"You won't screw up, cause I'll be taking care of you." Minako said. "Now, start!"

"Okay...how about, born in Liechtenstein, 1937-"

"Ooh! Stamp capital of the world!" Minako cried. We started giggling, and then tried to become serious. It was a try, because we failed. We started giggling again.

Day turned into night, and we had downloaded a picture of a German woman who had passed away recently. We had just printed it out, when Minako grabbed it and started examining it.

"Who is she?" I asked.

"Katrina Schweis. Died two years ago. No surviving friends or relatives." Minako informed me.

"Well, here's Dr. Anne Marie Mason." I said. I looked at her as she hugged me around the shoulders. We giggled, then laughed, and decided to go to dinner and celebrate.

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I got home, content and not drunk. I went to sleep, resolving that I'd write the paper tomorrow.

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I swear I never want to write another paper in my life. I wasn't too good in school. In fact, I slacked off a whole lot. I wanted to be a housewife. I got my job at Setsuna's show because I did very well with a part time job at a magazine. To get that job, my dad had to pull so many strings that my career began to look like Pinocchio. I mean, it's amazing that I remember about the copulatory imperative and my amygdala, because my memory is...not good.

I spent so much time dedicated to working on this paper. First, every sentence I wrote was horrible, and I ended up with a little ocean of yellow paper balls on the floor. It was like I had killed a rainforest for this small piece on men. Then, I sat with my laptop on my stomach, throwing a ball at a wall for about two hours. I couldn't get focused, and didn't know what to write. Then-I blame this on extreme boredom- I painted my nice fingernails and toes. Not with my favorite icing pink with sparkles, but with white out. The result was...very interesting. I decided I'd been working too hard, and went to get some food from the kitchen. I had just stuck the popcorn in the microwave, when Mamoru came in with another girl in tow. They were kissing and unzipping, until the popcorn started popping. They broke apart and looked at me. I was staring the other direction, trying to pretend I didn't notice.

"Um, hi, Usagi." Mamoru said. "This is Kae."

"Kae." I said. He nodded, then whispered something like, "Go to my room" in her ear, and off she went, wiggling her bloody ass. As soon as I left, I turned to him.

"You do realize she's a fucking junkie, right!" I cried.

I was definitely not happy to have a cocaine lover in the apartment. I've seen friends ruined by drugs. I can't stand them.

This is my business, not yours." Mamoru said. I turned to the microwave, still fuming, when Mamoru put his hand on my shoulder.

"No drugs, just sex, okay?" he said.

I wouldn't say a thing. Neither of what he just said was appealing. Either he was a slut, or a junkie. It made me mad, although I didn't know why I cared. Usually I didn't, but for some reason, I was really defensive when it came to Mamoru. Mamoru sighed, and went to meet the junkie. I took my popcorn and went back to my room, where I spent the rest of the day unable to even think about the paper.

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The next morning, at four in the morning, the phone rang. I didn't want to get it, but it wouldn't stop ringing, and I was getting a headache. "Hello...?" I said groggily.

"Have you written it yet?" Minako's voice was extremely loud this early in the morning.

"No-"

"WELL, WRITE IT!" Minako screamed, and hung up. I groaned and went back to sleep. I woke up again three hours later, grabbed my portable tape player, and started my paper.

"Every bull begins a relationship with certain cards up his sleeve-aces. Tools of seduction by which he lures a new cow. One of the most notorious examples is the Current Cow Sob Story. Allow me to deconstruct the essential elements: he tells you how hard it is to talk to her, and is glad that you are there to understand his needs; his feelings; his emotions. This is key to understanding the myth of male shyness, for though you think he is flattering you, he is actually flattering himself, showing how open and sensitive and honest he is."

Man, I was on a roll. Thinking about this and thinking of a poor sobbing Motoki just fueled my ambition.

"And just in case you're starting to think he's a cold-hearted, home-wrecking womanizer, he'll throw this "sensitive side" in just to prove he's putting his current cow out to pasture, for good reason, but he's actually tormented at the thought of abandoning her."

"Usagi...Usagi..."

I looked to see Mamoru at the door. "Yeah?"

"Keep it down. You're being loud. Neighbors are complaining." he said groggily.

"Oh. Sorry." I said, blushing.

He walked out of my room, shaking his head.

"What's that they say about the love of a good woman?" My mental image of Motoki was tormenting me.

"That once offered, it's surely going to come back and bite her in the ass." I whispered. "Enter case in point."

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I was typing away on my laptop, when Mamoru walked in and slammed the door. "You're home early," I commented.

"I lost interest," he said, dropping his coat on the kitchen counter.

"What, get a little rusty in that shining armor of yours?" I said, biting into an Oreo cookie.

He gave me a look, then said, "There was just something about her that just turned me off."

"Like what?" I asked.

"Please, Usagi, let's spare the interrogation."

"No, I'm serious. I want to hear this," I said earnestly.

He sighed. "So, we go to a movie, then we go to dinner, then back to her place, and she decides that she wants to watch TV. I mean, but spent about three hours sitting and watching a movie, but...I don't know."

I stared at him. "What did she do?"

"She just sat there watching some rugby game, screaming as if she were a guy - like one of the guys- and, there was just something about it...I grabbed my coat and left."

I couldn't believe this. This was MAMORU, who never got turned off. And he thought that...the slime.

"Okay, so you get repulsed by a beautiful girl because she actually likes sports - was it before or after half time?"

"After, I think."

"Did she put her feet up on the table?"

"W-what?"

"Answer the question, feet up or down?"

"Up, I think."

"So, you get repulsed by a beautiful girl wanting to watch a game because, inexplicably, she's interested in something other than make-up and being anorexic. Would anything have made a difference if she feet had been on the floor?" Mamoru rolled his eyes and walked out of the kitchen. " Even better! Would it have been better if she had watched the fashion channel? Or even the soap opera channel?" I called out after him.

"Good night, you psycho!"

"Good night you philistine!" Man, something was up with Mamoru. This was the man whose on switch was practically always on. How could he - the man that invented "sexual release"- not be interested? I narrowed my eyes. I'd have to study this in detail. And thinking about trailing him like a nature expert made me giggle.

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I sent Minako the article via e-mail. She called me a few minutes later.

"I LOVE it!" she cried. "Oh, Usagi, it's perfect."

"Glad you think so." I said. "Don't make me do it again. Do you understand it?"

"Yes."

"Good. Cause I don't."

"It'll be in the magazine soon."

We gabbed for a bit, then we hung up. I decided to have a well-deserved veg-out in front of the TV. And wouldn't you know, my favorite rugby team was playing a match that very afternoon. I sat in my favorite jersey and screamed my lungs out - just like a guy. I don't think Mamoru noticed, unless the glares he threw at me were about that.

It was official right at that moment: we were true roommates.

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A few weeks later, I had forgotten about the article when it was published. Minako was too busy working on another magazine project to remind me, so between us, it went unnoticed.

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"Are you sitting down?"

"No."

"Sit down."

"I'm sitting."

"You're not sitting."

I rolled my eyes. "Yes I am."

"Sit, or I won't tell you anything."

I sighed, and finally sat down. "All right, what?"

"Usagi, guess who read your article on the 'Good Morning' show?"

"SHIT! No way!"

"Oh, yeah way."

"NO FUCKING WAY!" I was hysterical.

"I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you it came out." Minako said hurriedly. "The Ewan McGregor project took a lot of my time."

(A/N: )

"No problem, but what am I going to DO!"

"Don't worry, I have it all under control. None of this is going to come near you."

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"What if they look for Dr. Mason?"

"The 'Good Morning' show is begging for her to appear as their guest, but I told the PR a different story. She's vacationing in China, she's at a conference in Mandarin."

I groaned. "My God, Minako. Mandarin is a dialect, not a town."

"Relax. I handled dating two guys at once, this is a piece of cake. Just relax. None of this is going to come near you. Trust me."

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"And so, while the male may often seem shy with all his 'you're so understanding and open' and embarrassed little glint in his eye," Setsuna said. She had given us all a copy of the magazine, and was reading my article out loud to the group. Mamoru was fighting the urge to laugh, Motoki looked confused, and Mitsuke, Setsuna's secretary, was laughing a bit. I wanted to die.

"He is actually a narcissist, because this apparent shyness belies deep-rooted feelings of unworthiness and a fear of rejection." Setsuna was really into this. "And this is what compels him to constantly seek attention from one cow to the next, ad nauseam," I mouthed along with her, "continuing this cycle to constantly feed his attention-seeking capabilities until he is well fed."

Mamoru couldn't help it anymore. He burst into laughter.

"This is great stuff! It's witty, it's compelling, it's real!" Setsuna gushed.

"There's only one problem, Setsuna." Motoki said. "No one can find this woman. 'Good Morning' had tried, all the newspapers and talk shows, and even radio's tried."

"Yeah? And have you tried?" Setsuna asked.

I needed to clear out my desk and never return. Later. If I survive.

Mamoru cleared his throat. "Actually...no."

"Well, get on it! Jump on the bandwagon!"

I needed to leave the room.

"Do you know what this is?"

Motoki and Mamoru looked at each other. "The unreachable?" they said, uncertain.

"YES! You need to reach the unreachable! Don't let anyone else but us get to Dr. Mason! We need her!"

I really needed to leave the room.

"Do you get it?"

Everyone said yes. Setsuna looked at me. "Reach for the unreachable, Usagi."

Setsuna had this way of making you feel like you were joining a cult. Today - with her eyes crazed with the prospect of finding a woman who doesn't truly exist, but thinks she can find her so her show can be number one in the world - was no exception. Except that it scared the hell out of me.

"Um - okay." I said softly. The meeting was over, and I ran out of her office. I ran as fast as I could to my office, and called Minako.

"Hello?"

"You're wrong."

"What happened?" Minako sounded panicked.

"I have to look for Dr. Mason."

"Oh. Just say you can't find her."

"I CAN'T!"

Minako kept reassuring me that everything was going to be okay, but I wasn't so certain. From now on, I'm going to be schizophrenic.

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Thanks for all the support y'all! I love you all!

EternalSenshi