Disclaimer: WE DON'T OWN INUYASHA! sob

Here's the first chapter of the first fanfic! I hope you enjoy it!

Warning: Yaoi/Shounen Ai!

Notes: Character thoughts are in "italics and quotes." Character actions are in boxy things?

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Sango: Oh Miroku!

Miroku: Yes, Sango? eager look

Inuyasha: questioning look towards Sango and Miroku ...?

Kagome: Hehehehehehehe?

Sesshoumaru: huggling a Miroku plushie -

Sango: sparkly eyes Will you bear my child:D

Miroku: Uh...? ...eh? ...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! runs from Sango

Inuyasha: mutters to self Like I didn't see that comin'...

Sesshoumaru: watches Miroku run away thinking "Damn! He's so hott!"

Kagome: EEK?

Miroku: hides in a bush Sango scary...

Sango: Miroku! Where are you! ...you're supposed' ta bare my child...

Kilala: ...mew?

Shippou: Kilala! runs up to Kilala and huggles her I wuv you...

Inuyasha: O.o;

Sesshoumaru: starts sneaking over towards the bush he saw Miroku hide in with a sly grin :)

Miroku: Hmm...let me think...NO! >:O

Kagome: WAAAAAAHHH?

Sesshoumaru slowly gets closer and closer to the bush.

Inuyasha: Er...Kagome? Darling dear, I hate to break this to ya but I hate you and am disgusted by you so...WE'RE THROUGH! WAHAHAHAHAHA!

Miroku: ...starts singing to self I'm a little teapot, short and stout, here is my handle, here is my spout...

Kagome: cries WAAAAAAAHHHH!

Inuyasha: hands on hips all proud like HAHA! TAKE THAT YOU BITCH! NOW I AM FINALLY RID OF YOUR IDIOUSY AND ANNOYANCE! HAHA!

All of a sudden, Miroku screams and there is rustling in the bush.

Miroku: runs out of bush screaming and half naked EVIL MONSTER!

Shippou: AAAAAAHHH! covers Kilala's eyes Avert your eyes Kilala! It burns!

Inuyasha: blink blink Oro? looks towards the bush and sees Sesshoumaru come out, licking his lips and grinning BROTHER!

Sesshoumaru: Don't go too far, Miro-kun! I'm not finished with you yet! Hee hee! starts chasing after Miroku

Miroku: cries while running from Sesshoumaru NOOOOOOOO!

Sango: Naked Miroku...drool

Inuyasha: faints ;

Sesshoumaru: leaps high up into the air and lands right on top of the fleeing Miroku Hi Miro-kun! Miss me? starts licking Miroku's cheek

Shippou: This is too much for my young eyes! And ears! AAAAAHH! runs away with Kilala

Miroku: shudders ...eh...panics and he finds out there's only one thing to do...stop...drop...and roll away

Sango: Wow...

Sesshoumaru: laying on the ground, surprised ...tricky bastard...

Miroku: gets up from the ground and runs as fast as he can as tears of fear stream down his warm cheeks

Kagome: wakes up Inuyasha Hi?...

Inuyasha: jumps up from the ground, suddenly filled with strength and courage Sesshoumaru! Brother! puffs out his chest What do you think you're doin' with my boyfr-I mean friend Miroku! I challenge you to a duel! unsheathes Tetsusaiga En guarde!

Sesshoumaru: watches Miroku run away as he slowly gets up, then turns to face Inuyasha Little Brother...do you honestly think you can defeat me? And he is MY Miro-kun, so BACK OFF! unsheathes his sword And by the way, I accept your puny challenge...I can always go find Miro-kun later...PREPARE YOURSELF! charges towards Inuyasha YAAHH!

Miroku: stops in his tracks as he gets a breath of air Phew...at least I get a chance to rest...wipes away his tears ...I'm half naked...o.o

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru charge towards eachother, then the battle-that wasn't really much of a battle-ended abruptly when Inuyasha stupidly tripped over a rock since he wasn't watching where he was going.

Sesshoumaru: chuckling to himself as he sheathes his sword That was easy...now to go find my Miro-kun! runs off in the direction he had seen Miroku go

Inuyasha:dizzy from fall Ugh! I was so close! I would have beaten him that time if not for this stupid rock! kicks rock, then jumps around holding his foot Ow! Ow! Ow!

Miroku: brushes himself off and begins running again I could run all day if I wanted to...

Sango: Where'd he go?... :(

Sesshoumaru: yelling to Miroku I could run forever, you know! I've got way more energy and strength than you'll ever have! WAHAHA! runs faster, gaining on Miroku

Miroku: tear drops from his eye as he stops in his tracks Sesshoumaru...doushite...doushite..? closes his eyes as he kneels down on the cold ground I beg of you...please don't rape me?...

Sesshoumaru: blink blink ...Rape? What're you talking about? What is the meaning of this word...this "rape"?

Inuyasha: now within view of Miroku and Sesshoumaru, but too far still to hear what they say Oh no! I'm too late! Miroku's kneeling to him! They're gonna get married! NO! I must hurry! Kagome! Get your arrows! We gotta shoot Sesshoumaru down! Quick! Before it's too late! runs towards Sesshi and Miroku

Miroku: ...bursts out laughing at Sesshoumaru's idiotic question...XD

Kagome: NO! YOU HATE ME! sobs

Inuyasha: halts in his tracks and faces Kagome Grrr! I don't hate you, okay! I love you a whole bunch, now come on!

Sesshoumaru: confused, but smiles at Miroku's happiness anyways ?

Miroku: smiles at the cute face Sesshoumaru is making then notices what he's doing and gets a very serious look on his face and clears his throat ...um...yea...stands up

Inuyasha: waits a few minutes for Kagome, then decides she's either going too slow or not coming at all and heads towards Sesshoumaru and Miroku

Sesshoumaru: NO! tackles Miroku to the ground before he can try to run away You're not goin' anywhere! unsheathes his sword and stabs it through the little clothing that Miroku is still wearing and into the ground, pinning him there

Miroku: struggles to get free but it's no use HELP!

Kagome: Sparkly eyes REAWLLY!

Inuyasha: now too far from Kagome to hear her babbling, but within earshot of Sesshi and Miroku Ack! I'm too late! SESSHOUMARU! DON'T! HE HAS AIDS!

Sesshoumaru: turning to look at Inu Hm? AIDS? What's that? O.o shrug Oh well... starts makin' out with Miroku

Miroku: lays there motionless wanting so much to escape but not finding the strength to get free ...I don't have AIDS...

Inuyasha: speeds up and mutters to self Stupid Brother...not knowing what AIDS is...what's the use of a lie when he doesn't get it..?

Sesshoumaru: notices Inu getting closer so he stops kissing Miroku, pulls his sword out of the ground, lifts Miroku over his shoulder, and runs off MINE! NOT YOURS! STAY AWAY, INU!

Miroku: is lifted, begins pounding Sesshoumaru in the back LET ME GO!

Sesshoumaru: still running Hm? Let you go? But you like me, don't you? I saw the way you looked at me earlier...I have the senses of a dog you know...sly grin

Miroku: blushes Uh...n-no...

Sesshoumaru: grins and increases his speed, heading towards a hidden cave

Inuyasha: stupidly trips on a rock again and falls flat on his face Dammit! Where's that stupid Kagome when I need her? KAGOME!

Miroku: "Oh goody!" Oh no please someone help! cough cough

Inuyasha: KAGOME, YOU BITCH,WHERE ARE YOU? MIROKU NEEDS HELP!

Sesshoumaru: "Stupid Inu, he'll never catch up if he waits for that ditsy bitch! Oh well, more fun for me! HA!"

Miroku: see's Sesshoumaru's butt and immediatly stops yelling and pounding on his back and begins gazing at Sesshoumaru's butt 0.0...

Miles and miles away, Shippou and Kilala are happily playing dolls together.

Shippou: waving around a Miroku doll "Help me! Somebody dooo something!" he then lifts up a Sesshoumaru doll "WAHAHA! He is mine now! And there is nothing you can do about it!" turns to Kilala Okay, your turn.

Kilala: holding an Inuyasha doll in her mouth Mew...

Anyway!

Sesshoumaru: at the mouth of the cave now, he turns around to see if Inu or Kagome has followed; luckily Inu's still yelling and Kagome is still nowhere to be found Heh...they make it just too easy...walks into the cave with Miroku over his shoulder as he plans to do something...devious...

Miroku: Put me down Sesshoumaru, please? puppy dog face

Kagome: WHAT! I can't hear you Inuyasha!

Inuyasha: has by now lost sight of Sesshoumaru and Miroku Grr...that bitch! This is all her fault! turns back towards where he came I'M COMIN' BACK KAGOME! JUST HOLD ON!

Sesshoumaru: Sure thing, Miro-kun. pats him on the butt and sets him down, then pulls out a hidden blanket, some champaigne, and a few candles

Miroku: blushes ...helps Sesshoumaru get the stuff ready

Once everything is set up-blanket spread, champaigne poured, and candles lit-Sesshi got Miroku to sit on the blanket and wait while he went to get into something "a little more comfortable."

Sesshoumaru: I'll be right back! Wait here, and no peeking! It's a surprise! runs off to a hidden part of the cave

(A lot of things sure are hidden around here, huh?)

WhileSesshoumaru runs to do something Miroku takes off the bit of clothing he has left on off, and waits for Sesshoumaru's arrival.

Sesshoumaru returns, half naked.

Sesshoumaru: grinning at Miroku and twirling around so he can see How do I look:)

Miroku: 0.0 drools... So...sexy...

Sesshoumaru: walks over and sits next to Miroku Thank you. glancing downward You don't look bad yourself... looks into Miroku's eyes longingly, brings his hand to Miroku's cheek, and kisses him passionately on the lips...

(Wuh oh! Looks like things are heatin' up here in the cave! What will happen next?)

Miroku: blushes, and kisses back sweetly placing a hand on Sesshoumaru's shoulder

(PHHFF! Like no one was expectin' that! I mean "Woo!" By the way, I was being sarcastic if ya didn't know.)

So, of course, they proceeded their actions which, also of course, led to non-other than sexual activity and the sort. Now, we return to wherever the hell Kagome and Inuyasha are.

Inuyasha: now out of breath and back to Kagome KAGOME YOU IDIOT! Since you were too busy worrying about whether I like you or not MIROKU GOT KIDNAPPED! Who knows what sort of sick and...devious...things Sesshoumaru could be doing to him? I oughta slap you a good one! raises hand to slap Kagome

Kagome: Inuyasha NOOOO! winces at the thought of bieng smacked

Sango: returns with a line of fish Fish, anyone?

All of a sudden, Kilala runs out and snatches all the fish from Sango, then runs off!

Inuyasha: lowers his arm, still glaring at Kagome though Fine, I won't. I should though...listen to me next time, Bitch...

Kagome: flutters her eyelashes at Inuyasha Okay...

Inuyasha: blushes slightly and turns away Idiot...

Back at the cave, Sesshoumaru and Miroku have finished their...devious...acts and stuff and now they are standing at the entrance of the cave, straightening their clothes and getting ready to leave.

Sesshoumaru: tying his sash around his waist, then straightening his hair Miro-kun, you can head back towards your friends if you want to-you don't have to mention what happened unless you want to-but I'm going eastward. I know that Inuyasha would just want to "fight" again and he'd just stupidly trip on a rock again; and that, of course, would be a waste of my time. So...farewell... kisses Miroku's cheek quickly, then leaps up into a tree and heads eastward; leaping from tree to tree

Miroku: places his hand over the spot Sesshoumaru kissed as he watches his love leap away I love you...a tear falls from his eye, begins walking home

Back to Kagome teasing Inuyasha and Kilala running around with Sango's fish!

Inuyasha: trying to turn the subject away from his and Kagome's relationship Do you guys think Miroku will ever get free?

Before anyone can answer!

Kikyou: coming from nowhere with bow and arrow aimed at Inu INUYASHA!

Inuyasha turns around and Kikyou releases the arrow and it pierces him straight in the heart. The force of the arrow sends him flying backwards, pinning him to a tree.

Inuyasha: "Not again!" Kikyou...you bitch... passes out

Miroku comes within sight of the scene just as Inu faints.

Miroku: Uh...Inuyasha's dead?...

Sango: AHHHHHHHHHH:O

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The end! Of this chapter anyway! Please review and tell us what you think!