Phillip's will was read right after the funeral, and only now do I know anything about it. I've just learned that he's going to give Alexandra some stock only if she works in the mailroom. (Poor Dmitri!) He's given his ex-father in law's restaurant (which apparently he owned) to Lizzie. The girl can barely handle living day to day without hurting someone and he gives her a restaurant filled with hot ovens, sharp knives and assorted blunt instruments. Wow, Dad of the Year. And then he gives his ex-wife Olivia her other ex-husband's boyhood home, Crass Creek or something.

And worst of all, he gave the company to Gus. Yep, Shadow Boy. The man can't shave properly and he owns a company. Oh for heavens sake, why the hell would he-

That bastard.

James Rockford from Legal came up with a copy of Phillip's Will and a small box. James looked me in the eye and said "You're in the will."

"I'm what?" I asked. Like Hell I'm in the will.

"You're in the Will." He motioned to the thirty page booklet in his right hand. "Half the people in town are in it, but you're on page twelve."

I nearly laughed. "You're kidding me!"

"No, even Bobby Fremond's in it."

"Bobby? What did Bobby get?"

"A Xena costume."

Then I did laugh aloud.

James continued "Jeremy Anstinson and his clone got matching key chains. They were really pissed about it." He set the small box down on the table. "It's all yours."

Once I stopped laughing I wiped the tears out of my eyes and opened the box and took out my inheritance: A plain white coffee mug. "Oh Phillip, you bastard," I said lovingly. Then I noticed something, inside the mug was a piece of paper. I took it out and looked at it.

It was a check to me from Phillip Spaulding for five thousand dollars.

No, it had to be a fake, I told myself. But the longer I looked at and examined it the more real it looked. I was in shock. He wouldn't! No possible way.

Then I noticed there was writing on the other side of the coffee cup. I turned it around and read the inscription.

"Best Secretary Ever!"

I set down the mug, closed the office door, sat there for and cried for fifteen minutes.