Fragile
By Kawaii Cherry Blossom
Disclaimer: I don't own Pokémon, or the song 'Fragile' by Delta Goodrem. The rights to both are property of their respective owners.
Rating: M15 - Mature themes
Genre: Drama/Angst/Romance
Type: AAMRN
Summary: Taking a break from Pokémon training, Ash returns to Cerulean City to spend some time with Misty. But as he catches up with his best friend, he learns that much has changed since he once knew her… Or did he?
Ages:
Ash – 18
Misty – 18
Chapter 2
The Only Way
"Sometimes I feel like I'm alone
Sometimes I feel like I'm not that strong
Sometimes I feel so frail, so small
Sometimes I feel vulnerable
Sometimes I feel a little fragile
A little fragile…"
ASH
I can feel my heart pounding in my chest, my fear overtaking me, as I spot Misty lying on the kitchen floor, her eyes closed, with fragments of what used to be a glass smeared around her.
"Mist?" I call out her name softly as I kneel down beside her, being careful not to kneel over any glass. Her eyes are closed, but she's breathing softly. It seems like she's just…sleeping? Well, that's a good sign, I guess…
"Misty, can you hear me?" I touch her cheek gently, and she stirs slightly, but doesn't wake up. What's wrong? Is she sick? Is she not telling me something? No time to worry about that now, though. I should move her onto the couch…
I sigh worriedly, before putting my arms underneath her and lifting her up, and I'm sure that right now, my face is extremely red, but I don't care. I can't help but notice, though, that she's extremely light. Not that she was ever heavy…
Laying her down on the couch, I sit beside her and glance down at her face, having decided that if she needs sleep, there's no point waking her up. She really is beautiful. She hasn't changed much over the years, still as pretty as ever. Her hair is longer though, and she doesn't wear it up anymore. She's wearing a touch of makeup, as well. Her sister's influence, I'm guessing. It's her clothing that strikes me as quite strange, however. She's dressed in jeans and a baggy jumper, although it's hot outside. I don't have time to ponder it, however as she begins to stir. Her hand moves up to her head as her eyes flutter open, and for a moment she looks confused, before she shoots up.
"Huh?" she cries, glancing around.
"Mist, it's alright," I say as I lean forward slightly, putting my hand on her arm comfortingly. I don't care that she can probably notice the blush spreading across my cheeks as I do so, I just want to know what's wrong with her.
"Oh…" she says quietly, calming down and laying back on the couch. "What happened?"
"I don't know…" I tell her. "I heard the sound of a glass being dropped, and you were in the kitchen on the ground. You fainted…"
"Oh…" she glances away, looking uncomfortable.
"Misty… Are you sick or something?" my tone is serious, and it's making her very nervous, I notice.
"N-no, I'm fine," she stammers, but regains her composure and looks back at me with a slight smile. "I'm just a bit tired, that's all. Running the gym by myself is a big job, you know."
How tired can she be to collapse? Surely, she knows how to organise her time so that she gets enough sleep… She does look tired, but… There's something else. She's lying, and I can tell. But I know better than to question her. The last thing I want is for her to get angry at me…
I glance up at her, noticing that she looks as if she's going to fall asleep again.
"Maybe you should get some rest, then… I can look after the gym for you."
"But…"
"No buts, Misty, you need sleep. You can't be collapsing. What if I wasn't here to help?"
She doesn't argue, I think she's too tired to even attempt it. Instead, she lets her eyes close and falls back against me, leaning her head on my arm.
"Don't leave Ash…okay… Don't leave me…"
What?
I wonder if I'm hearing things, and I glance down instantly, but she said it. What does that mean? Her voice sounded so innocent, so…delicate, like a child who needs reassurance.
"I won't…" I reply, but she's already asleep, her breaths coming out softly and steadily as she lies against me.
Something is going on here. I'm sure of it now. But what… She could be sick, that's the most likely possibility. But why wouldn't she tell me? I'm her best friend… She hasn't contacted me in three months, which is very strange because usually we write at least once a week, and talk on the phone most nights. But every time I tried to call over the past few months, there was no answer. I even contacted Cerulean's Officer Jenny, to check if something had happened, but she told me that the Gym was running as per normal.
One thing's for sure, though. I'm not going back to Pallet until I find out what's wrong.
What's going on with you, Misty…?
MISTY
Where am I?
Oh, I'm on the couch, I realise as I take in my surroundings, the sky blue walls and yellow roof telling me that I'm in the living room. A moment later, a recollection of thoughts drifts into my mind as I remember what happened earlier. And it must have been much earlier, since it's dark outside.
Shoot.
I wonder if Ash is suspicious.
You idiot, Misty, of course he's suspicious. You collapsed, for goodness sakes.
Oh well, it will just take a bit of fake reassurance to turn his concerns around.
But I want him to find out. I want him to find out so he can help me.
No, I can't be helped by him, only by myself.
God…this is going to kill me...
No it's not. But wouldn't you rather die than be the disgusting person you are now?
Yeah, I would.
Closing my eyes, as if in pain, I will my thoughts away, and my nose takes in a scent coming from the kitchen. Moments later, Ash appears in the doorway, his concerned eyes lighting up when he finds me awake.
"Misty, hey. How are you feeling?" he asks, rushing over and kneeling down beside the couch.
"Fine, thanks…" He smiles at that, and stands up. Good, he believes me.
"That's good to hear. I made you some soup. I'll be right back."
"Oh, no, really, I'm not hungry," I call out, but he keeps on walking, before he disappears through the kitchen door.
Damnit.
Moments later, he reappears, holding a bowl. With careful concentration, he places it on the coffee table in front of me, and sits down beside me.
"Ash, really, I'm not hungry…"
"Don't be silly, you have to keep up your strength. There's nothing worse than feeling hungry, especially when you're tired!"
Yeah…
"Here," he takes the tray and sets it on my lap.
I can't eat this; it's full of sugar and fat.
But I have no choice. If Ash finds out…
I can always get rid of it later…
Picking up the spoon, I notice Ash is peering at me worriedly.
"What?" I ask, becoming annoyed. He looks away immediately, and stands up, smiling at me. I glance down at the soup, a sick feeling rising up in my stomach as I look at it. I can feel his eyes on me, so trying not to think about it, I dip the spoon into the liquid and bring it up to my mouth, before swallowing it slowly. I fake a smile up at him and push aside my thoughts.
"When did you learn how to cook?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. He laughs sheepishly.
"Brock taught me. Said it was about time I learned how to do things myself."
Smiling slightly, I glance back down at the soup, and knowing he's still watching me, I take another small spoonful. He tells me he'll be back in a few moments, and leaves the room, but I only half notice.
It tastes so good… Food tastes so good… I'm aware, now, of how hungry I am. When was the last time I ate anything? This morning I ate a banana...
No, I can't do this. I can't!
But it's too late, and I've finished the bowl before my thoughts have the power to protest.
"Oh, you're finished. Do you want another bowl?" Ash asks. I didn't even notice him come back in the room…
Yes. Can I have fifty more bowls please? As well as ten-thousand bags of chips, a million chocolate bars…
Oh God, shut up Misty and shake your head, you idiot!
Shaking my head, I move forward and place the tray onto the table. Though I feel shaky and unstable, I force myself to stand, and he moves forward instantly to support me.
"Whoa, be careful."
"I'm fine, Ash. I just want to go to the bathroom," I say, a little too much anger invading my voice, and he steps back and nods. I glance away from his worried eyes and want to cry, fall into his arms, plead with him to help me…
But no, I can't. I can't. He'll just ruin everything…
Keeping myself steady, I move towards the downstairs bathroom. I don't think I'll be able to make it up the stairs… When I get inside, I push the door shut and make sure it's locked. I turn on the radio in the shower and move towards the toilet, opening the lid and kneeling in front of it. I close my eyes, my emotions swirling in my head, a painful tornado of thoughts. But no, this is the only way…
Leaning over the bowl, I stick my fingers down my throat and feel the sick feeling rise within me, before I throw up what I just ate.
This is the only way.
This is the only way.
To be continued…
Just a quick note… I know the chapters are short, but they are meant to be. Short 'n' simple. Thank you for reading.
Love and light,
Sarah.