Apologies: I'm sorry to all of you for the long wait! Gomen-nasai! My life has been hectic lately, and tied with that horrible writers block nothing was getting done. Also I've been drawing more often lately, so that makes progress even slower. I'm also trying to figure out what the next curse is going to be! –Sweatdrop- Yeah, I don't know what it is. But I really should focus on the present.
These long waits are probably going to happen more now because were now getting deep into the thicket of this plot. I don't know what it's going to do. The plot is in control of ME, not vice versa as it should be. So get ready for the randomness and the unexpected! It's going to be a bumpy ride.
Or just because I lack the motivation to write...
Oh yeah... MY FIC IS A YEAR OLD. Since September 2nd. That's Ryou's birthday. Happy really belated birthday you guys! And my own belated birthday, but that's not important –waves it off-.
Disclaimer: I could own it. How do you I'm not Takahashi-sama? –Grins-
Warnings: if anything offends you in anyway, I apologize. None of Ryou's Family members are actually important; they're there for humor purposes.
Bakura: Kyoko-tachi is not responsible for any injuries you may... attain while reading this fanfiction. Sore sides, falling out of chairs, teary eyes (from laughing) and any other laughing related pains/mishaps might occur.
This Story is not suitable for people who:
a Can't take good humor
b Who have no sense of humor
c Have a six-foot pole stuck up their ass
d All of the above or
e Are younger than 6, we do not wish to corrupt there little minds (such as the Authoress's).
Also we wish to say this. Anything you see written here in this fanfiction please do NOT try at home. The cast is what we call... professionals (cough from authoress).
The Seven Curses of Egypt
Jubaku
Chapter fifteen
"I hate pigeons! Pooping rats with wings!" Una1
"It looks like you and it talks like you. I hate it." –Beelzebub, The Wish list by Eoin Colfer
Ryou, Yugi and Yami had returned to the spot where they had previously left Bakura unattended (now we all know that was a stupid thing to do)... only to find no Bakura. And a different Guard.
"Bloody hell I told him to stay where he was!" Ryou was mad. No, that was an understatement. Ryou was pissed off. "When he gets back I'm... I'm... I'm gonna go Pharaoh on his ass!"
Yami was amused by Ryou's... anger management session he was currently having. Actually, most people reading this would call it a grown up temper tantrum (OF DOOM!), but the authoress frequently relieves stress in such a manner... alas I digress.
"Actually," Yugi spoke up, "You told him to, and I quote 'don't cause him bodily damage.'" Yugi made to bunny ears and wiggled them while saying the aforementioned quote. If anyone was paying attention to Yami they would have noticed his flinch towards the seemingly innocent gesticulation of the fingers. Well actually the readers are, but sadly they don't effect the present of our dear Heros, just the near and upcoming future.
Alas I digress again (I seem to get carried away a lot, ne?)
Now what Yugi had just said was not the best thing to do to a mad albino Hikari on the rampage after his darker clinically insane clone (or was it he who was the clone?) who just indiscriminately or deliberately wandered off in a City full of innocent pedestrians and strangers (gasp).
Ryou stopped his screeching and slowly turned around to face Yugi with a scary/evil face that resembled Bakura's when he was really pissed. Yugi 'eeped' in fear and slowly inched away from the creepy Ryou (I would to! –hides-) to hide behind his Yami shield (3000x limited edition, only one in existence!).
"What. Did. You. Say?" Ryou said calmly, yet on the inside he was smoldering.
Yugi made a noise that sounded like a strangled emu (I'll leave that to your imaginations, due to the fact that even I have no clue what it sounds like). "I said you didn't tell him to stay here, you just assumed–" Yugi made another sound that resembled a chocking Toucan (again, use your imagination) when Ryou was nose to nose and had smoke coming from his nostrils (Dragon Ryou... WEEE!).
"Ok! You did say it!" Yugi squeaked. Ryou 'humph'ed (did you know my spell check wanted to change that to 'humped'?), backed away and continued his... adult temper tantrum (OF DOOM!).
Now you're also wondering why Yami did nothing to protect Yugi from Ryou except for being a shield. Well, let's just say Yami knows that Ryou wouldn't hurt Yugi (or would he?), so Yugi was safe. He' just yell at him, not too much damage. Besides, Ryou never called anyone names, except Malik... and Ishtar... and Bakura. Ok, so maybe he did, but never Yugi.
Never sweet little Yugi Motou. Only nickname he could ever hear his aibou being called was...
Yugi-boy.
Shudder.
Kooo...
A figure cloaked in shadow (cliché!) on top of a building watched the antics of the three down below. A soft chuckle resounded from the shade.
"So they're going into the Shadow realm to fix the Curse?" Meiun said.
Koooooo...
Koooo... Koooo...
A smirk adorned Meiun's lips. This was going to be fun. "Well I guess I'm going to have to go and stop them, ne?"
Koooooooo... kooo... koooooo...
"And will someone get these pigeons off my head!" The she shrieked, trying desperately to get the birds off her head, with no avail.
Kooo?
She snorted. "Damn birds." And blew a wisp of long raven hair out of her light brown eyes.
Ko-o-o-o-o. The pigeon was laughing
"Ryou!!" A loud shrill voice called rather loudly (duh) and excitedly. Before Bakura could react he was pulled into a (death defying) hug which knocked him into the person in front of him which resulted in a domino effect, but the authoress doesn't care to tell you about randomly un-important characters, Bakura is her main priority right now (and shall forever be).
-Pause button is pressed-
You're wondering why I (the almighty God –gets hit by lightning- ok, authoress) haven't really written where Bakura is (or where he was previously). Well:
#1. I don't know myself and quite frankly don't care. It's just random information that isn't necessary (but for some reason people like to know, but because I'm feeling so extremely annoying right now, I'm not going to tell you By the way that was reason #2 –laughs like munchkin, than tries to kill the unfortunate muse who put helium in the air–!!!!) And waists document space that can be filled with wonderful dialogue and humor. That was the rest of reason #1
#3. Writers block. Come here my little friend while I dismember you. –Goes into Faust VIII mode– I always wondered what mysteries you hold in you anatomy. –Whips out scalpel she purloined from Mr. Wenzel's off limits storeroom full of dissecting stuff and poisons–
-Un paused-
"Eeee! Ryou! It's been a bloody long since I last saw you! My you've certainly grown! Last time I saw you, we were seven-years-old! My god your so cute!" Dramatic sigh from the offending leech girl. "Too bad you're my cousin, or that would be incest! Wow, interesting hairstyle you got there. Never knew you were into demon-bunny-ears! Is that the style in that crazy place you live in, ya know Doomino? Hun? Ryou?"
During the time in which the leech girl was babbling Bakura had taken the time to wriggle out of her grasp. He was now promptly staring at her in horror (yes Bakura has space issues, we all do). Well, what would you do if some crazy girl you don't even know glomped you and called you your aibou's name?
"... First of all, whom the bloody fucking hells are you! Number two, I'm not Ryou! Number three; GET THE BLOODY HELL AWAY FROM ME!" And then, in a very tomb-raiderly fashion, ran screaming down the busy street like a banshee. You see, very tomb raiderly (winks).
But as you see, when you're wanted (dead, alive or glomped to sheer traumatization) you're almost always chased.
And all of Bakura's decendants share one thing in common. There stubbornness.
And there love of the chase. Except Ryou. He's still stubborn... but he was voted most likely to have a family defect (which his crazy grandmother kept saying was the fault of his Japanese father. She always knew them Shinto Traditions would screw up the child (1)).
Wait... that's two things, ignore the earlier statement.
"Ryou!!"
Ryou turned around just in time before his screaming yami ran smack dab into him. Very hard might I add. Ryou and Bakura tumbled on the ground, and when they stopped Ryou was on top trying to strangle the life out of Bakura, which wasn't working because he was already dead but Ryou gets an A for effort.
Ryou was shaking Bakura's head back and forth, which made the yami's head bang on the asphalt repeatedly.
"You idiot! I told you to stay where you were! But no! You had to go wander off in a huge city with strangers (gasp) and innocents! You could have hurt someone! Someone could have hurt you! Damnit! Why don't you listen!" Ryou screamed.
"Because you told me to, and I quote," Bakura said and raised his fingers to the 'bunny ears' and wiggled them. Yami twitched with discomfort (due to the fact that he has issues with certain gesticulations). Yugi slapped his forehead (due to the fact that Bakura was about to go through what he did, but he didn't have a Yami shield to protect him). Ryou growled, but Bakura ignored that. "'Don't cause him bodily harm.' And I didn't. But I do think I'm on someone's restraining list. Yes, he's traumatized. Why can't people accept me for who I am! Damn one minded idiots."
Ryou was practically foaming at the mouth. Steam was coming out of his ears. He was going to kill Bakura (but we all know Bakura's dead, but it'll cause him a lot of pain. Ouch).
Just as Ryou was about to strangle Bakura, something collided with him, sending him yet again to the ground with a bang.
"Ryou!!" Squealed the girl whom had previously chased Bakura on a whirlwind pursuit through the busy streets of central London (and kept up with him!). "Eee! Ryou it's been forever! I missed you!"
The girl had blue hair (another thing Ryou's family inherited from Bakura is odd hair colour) tied into two long ponytails and brown eyes. She was regular hight and supported a long white skirt and black blouse.
Ryou had put aside his anger and traded it for exasperation. "Hello Sarah." He said not really looking at her. If you were listening closely you could here a distinct cough and the mutterings of 'leech girl' from one of Ryou's companions.
Sarah was bubbly, to put it lightly. She was popular, to put it bluntly. She was annoying, that was an understatement. She was your regular in-crowd girl with all the connections.
"Ryou," Sarah said. "When did you start to clone yourself?"
Collective sweat dropping and anime falling from our 3 protagonists (and our little psycho).
"He's not my clone!" Ryou yelled.
Bakura leaned over and whispered into Yami's ear, "No, he's my clone." Then to bug the monarch further, licked his finger and stuck it in his ear (a wet willy I belive it's called). Yami shuddered and jumped a bit while he heard the distinct 'ku ku ku' from a certain silver-haired terror (no, Bakura is not a pigeon!)
Sarah walked up to Bakura and walked around the yami, who glared at her and watched her to make sure she didn't try anything. "Then what is he?" She asked, tugging at Bakura's hair, electing a growl from said being and snicker from a 3000 year old pharaoh.
"He's my—" Ryou began but was rudely cut off by Bakura.
"I'm his cousin." Bakura said with a smile. "On his Otou-san's side of the family." Bakura said. To add to the authenticity, he said 'Otou-san' instead of 'Dad'.
"Really. What's your name?" Sarah asked, not entirely convinced.
"Ryu Bakura." Bakura said, with a glare.
"That's Ryou's name. You can't be Ryou Bakura." She said smartly grinning smugly.
"Our names are spelt differently. My name is spelt 'R-Y-U' not 'R-Y-O-U'. They are just pronounced the same, DUH. And they mean different things. So our names aren't the same. In your face leech girl!" Bakura said, flashing a victory sign.
Ryou sighed, any traces of previous anger gone. "Oh great, I can just feel the love floating around in the air." He said, waving his arms in the air for emphasis. Yugi nodded silently as Sarah and Bakura engaged in a staring (actually it was more glaring) contest.
To say the least, the rest of the evening wasn't the best. Sarah thought it best to take Ryou to a short meet-and-greet with his family (she thoroughly said he was family-time deprived, but aren't all sixteen-year-olds?).
The Carters seemed like an every day family. They lived in a normal house, with a normal garden in a normal neighborhood. The household consisted of Ryou's Aunt, Uncle, his 2 cousins and his grandmother. But all that normalcy in the quaint little place must have gone to there heads and short-circuited, because they were far from normal... normalcy was overrated anyway.
"So Ryou, how were your studies this year?" Ryou's Uncle Andy asked. They were sitting in the living room waiting for supper. Our heroes were crowded on the chesterfield facing Sarah, Andy and Ryou's grandmother, who was fondly named Grams Cracker for the overwhelming sent of Gram Crackers that wafted off her (we can all tell who named her that, can't we?).
"Oh, they were fine." Ryou said, taking a small sip of Tetley tea™. 'Ryu', Yami and Yugi just sat and listened to the small conversation, feeling politely ignored by the Carters, but ignored nonetheless (is there such a thing as being politely ignored by the way?). Yugi was munching on a gram cracker quietly, Yami was drinking tea like a noble and Bakura was playing with the aluminum coasters, seemingly fascinated with the clinking they made when bashed together while humming along to one of his favorite songs: "Making Christmas".
"DINNERS READY!" Came the shirking voice of Aunt Clarice from the dining room.
Our heroes and Ryou's relatives piled into the dining room. On the table was a small roast, potatoes, carrots, rutabaga, broccoli and gravy. Andy sat at the end of the table while Our heroes sat all together on one side and the rest of the carter family (Grandma, Sarah, Clarice and Valerie) sat opposed to them.
The food was passed around the table as people picked what they wanted. When the roast beef was passed to Bakura, he gasped and dropped the serving fork and the plate. No one noticed that he dropped the fork first.
"Don't worry Ryu. I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you the plate was kinda hot. Go to the bathroom and run your hand under some cold water. That should make it better." Andy said and put a comforting hand on Bakura's shoulder. Bakura nodded his thanks and left the room quickly.
Ryou, Yugi and Yami watched the Dark spirit leave the room then glanced at each other. Yami sighed and picked up the serving spoon for the carrots. A slight burning sensation came from the spoon.
'What the—oh shit!'
He quickly served himself and handed the carrots to Valerie who thanked him. After everyone was finished serving themselves and eating he lifted up his hand and saw it was a bit pinkish where he held the spoon previously. Yami sighed again.
'I hate to say it but, poor Bakura.'
Bakura walked into the bathroom cradling his hand tenderly. He looked down at it and shuddered at the unpleasant sight, what should have been soft pale skin was now red inflamed, peeling skin that burned. Rather repulsive in his mind.
He reached over to touch the taps when another vault of intense feeling of burning shot through his fingers he quickly recoiled and stepped hastily away from the sink. In doing so he accidentally tripped over the rim of the bathtub and went sprawling into it with a satisfying thwack.
"THUD"
Everyone looked up from their meals and shot questioning looks at each other. Then everyone looked down the long hall where the bathroom was located. Ryou put his fork down and stood up.
"May I pleased be excused for a moment as to check up on Ryu?" Ryou asked, not forgetting to be polite.
"Sure you can Dear." Aunt Clarice said with a smile. "Just do hurry back. I'm sure you and Ryu don't want to have cold dinners."
"Thank you." Ryou said and left the room and headed to the bathroom to check on his yami. He opened the bathroom door to see Bakura sprawled in the tub with the family cat playing with his hair. The sight was quite comical if it weren't for the pained look in Bakura's eyes and the fact that he had both hands held against his chest, attempting to protect them.
Ryou watched as Bakura attempted to get out of the tub without much success. Ryou smiled pitifully at him and helped the troubled yami out of his confinement.
"Are you alright?" Ryou asked and he took hold of Bakura's hand, electing a sharp hiss from the aforementioned being.
Ryou looked at Bakura and gently unfurled the spirits hands. Ryou made a gasp and visibly winced at the palm of the left hand (2) and the tips of the fingers on his right hand. He looked up at Bakura then back at the dark spirits hands.
"What happened?" Ryou asked, a slight quiver in his already worried voice.
"The cutlery is silver. The taps are mostly made of silver." Bakura said as Ryou shifted through the medicine cabinet for some gauze and some cream for his burns.
"Silver?" Ryou asked as he sat back down and took Bakura's left hand and applied the cream. This made Bakura hiss in pain. "Sorry," Ryou said meekly. "I'll try and be careful. What about silver?"
Bakura winced at the sting. "Do you know how silver is supposed to kill all things unholy and keep away all things from the other world."
"Yeah. If you remember I have several Irish relatives and I'm Catholic."
Bakura glared at Ryou's attempt to be funny. "Yes. Well, sadly I'm affected by it. Also by Cold Iron and Holy water for future reference. Anyway, I seem to be allergic to silver."
Ryou sat and digested what his yami said while wrapping the gauze around Bakura's hands. "What about Yami?"
"What about the pharaoh?" Bakura said with a huff.
"Isn't he affected to?" Ryou asked.
"Not like me. He feels the burning sensation and he might have some pink skin that will get irritated. But that's all really. I was not blessed with his fortune. I was not favored or protected by the gods. Thus I am treated like the rest of the lower spirits... to a certain extent. Silver can kill regular spirits." Bakura said with a sigh.
"Can it kill you?" Ryou asked.
"No. I'll either be sent back to the ring, back to the shadow realm or lose my humanoid form and return back to insubstantial dark energy blob. Pleasant thoughts all of them."
Ryou finished up wrapping Bakura's hands as the two of them sat in silence. Ryou finished and put away the supplies. "Come on. We'll say your not feeling that entire well, ok? That way you wont have any unwanted questions about using a plastic fork." He said with a small smile.
At that Bakura chuckled and followed Ryou out of the room.
The rest of the evening was uneventful though there were a few stray comments about Bakura's bandaged hands but no one truly dwelled on the matter. While the rest of the people finished dinner and ate some vanilla cheese cake Bakura was happily dozing on the couch with the cat and its four kittens happily cuddling and nuzzling up against him. Lets all take a moment to saw 'Aw! How cute!'
They stayed for a few hours before thanking the Carter's for the wonderful evening. Andy drove them to the hotel where he gave one final hug to Ryou, a good bye to Yami and Yugi and a wished Bakura well and drove off back to the quiet London suburbs.
When our heroes arrived back at the hotel, Yami and Bakura both sensed something was out of place. When they opened there hotel room and unwanted surprise awaited them.
Someone had been in there room.
And this person wasn't the maid. If it were a maid, they did the exact opposite of what maids were supposed to do. All there stuff was on the floor, ransacked.
1: Ryou's Grandmother is prejudice –glares at her-
2: Bakura is left handed Cuz I want him to be. So ha!
FINALLY DONE!
Sorry once again for the long wait everyone. Sorry, cliffy comes to.
Review responses:
NeoChick: HEY! thanks for taking all that time to read (yeah I was kinda pressuring you...). Congratulations for filling an entire page of your reviews. Sorry I couldn't make my thank you any longer. Thanks for the quotes at the bottom, I'll try and imply them some other time.
EveltheEvil: My loyalist fan? I dunno, you have a lot to compete with. I know you're my loyalist Artemis Fowl Fan (PS: Guess what1 they have a new Artemis fowl book out... or so my friend says. Called "The Artemis fowl files")
Ente: I know what you mean –recalls the Boonies- -shudders- I think we all wish we could be Bakura, if only for a while.
Una-imoto: ZEEKY BOOGY DOOG!!!!! –glomps her imoto- All the stuff you say goes to my ego. That's not healthy! Stop stop! Ok don't stop. I like that kinda fertilizer. DOWN WITH DRUNK HUMOR! DIE!
Kage: evil starbucks... It was the best chapter? I dunno, I like this one. Actually muy fave is somewhere in the 6 to 8 range. Bakura wears either a loin cloth or nothing? Probably nothing –blush- because I can't see you wearing a loin cloth in jeans.
Yoshikuni Miharu (MY YOSHI!!!):BAKURA IS MY BESHIE! –glares at the dog insult-
I AM DOING A CAMEO FOR THE 100TH REVIEWER (KAGE-CHAN YOU DON'T COUNT) I'LL E-MAIL THE WINNER THE DETAILS.
-Holds up sign that reads 'Will work for reviews'-