Galadriel, while walking through the forest, looking for Celeborn and Jack Sparrow, almost fainted when she saw her husband and Jack Sparrow in pink boxer shorts dancing to "YMCA".
"CELEBORN I THOUGHT I SAID NO RUM!"
Celeborn turned around, took one look at Galadriel, and dashed out of sight.
Galadriel turned her piercing stare onto Jack Sparrow.
Jack cowered against her glare and then followed Celeborn.
Galadriel lifted her arms up in the air in defeat, and muttered to a nearby elf, "Warn everyone in Lorien that a drunk Jack Sparrow and Celeborn are roaming freely through our lands." She put her hand on her forehead dramatically. "I need to see my psychiatrist."
She looked over at the elf she had been talking to. "You take over party preparations."
"But - but -"
"Don't 'but' the Queen of Lothlorien!" snapped Galadriel, and left to have an - uh - appointment.
The elf, who's name was Tenuvian, stared after Galadriel in shock, and then roused Lorien's inhabitants.
"I want chips, dip, soda, music, a DJ, everything!" yelled Tenuvian. "This party needs to be a REAL par-tay!"
Then he began dancing. "Get low, get low, get low, get low," he sang, "To the windooooow, to the walls! To the sweat run down by balls! Down these females crawl!"
The elves, now and again glancing sideways at Tenuvian to make sure he was sane, got to work, and after they were done - let's just say the Shirefolk could never compete with THIS party, baby.
"Tig."
"Tag."
"Double Tig."
"You can't Double Tig a Tag! Now you've got to pull my boxers down and act like an elephant."
Merry and Pippin had FINALLY stopped singing, (to Elrond's delight) and were continuously poking one another on the shoulder and saying "tig" and "tag". Apparently it was some sort of game.
"You see," said Aragorn, indicating Merry and Pippin, speaking as if he were on the Discovery Channel, "The mating habits of these bizarre creatures..."
"We're not gay," interrupted Merry, glaring at Aragorn. "That's Frodo and Sam."
"Hey!" snarled Sam, brandishing his frying pan. "At least I'm not Legolas, being all girly and prissy and... heck, his bedroom's covered in flowers!"
Legolas whipped out his white knives. "What did you say?"
Sam gulped. "Noth-"
"He said that YOU were the gay one," said Frodo, stepping in front of Sam, "We've all seen the way you look at Gimli."
"WHAT???" shouted Legolas, turning red.
"Yeah," said Eomer, "Remember when we first met? I threatened to kill Gimli and you threatened to kill me."
Legolas turned even redder. "We're FRIENDS, you idiot!"
"And have you seen the way he looks when Aragorn touches his shoulder..." Faramir whispered to Elrohir.
"ENOUGH!" shouted Aragorn. "I think we ALL know who's the gay one in Rivendell."
Everyone looked at him.
He looked around at them, and whispered, "Elrond."
Everyone turned around to look at Elrond.
He was crouched on the ground, crawling around and chasing a squirrel.
"Must - have - SQUIRREL!!!"
"Yep," said Merry, "You're right, Aragorn."
"For once," muttered Pippin.
Aragorn, having heard that last comment, lunged at Pippin with a loud "RAAAAAR!!" and Pippin and Merry dashed out of the way, and they ran the rest of the way to Lorien, everyone in Rivendell chasing after them.
"CELEBORN I THOUGHT I SAID NO RUM!"
Celeborn turned around, took one look at Galadriel, and dashed out of sight.
Galadriel turned her piercing stare onto Jack Sparrow.
Jack cowered against her glare and then followed Celeborn.
Galadriel lifted her arms up in the air in defeat, and muttered to a nearby elf, "Warn everyone in Lorien that a drunk Jack Sparrow and Celeborn are roaming freely through our lands." She put her hand on her forehead dramatically. "I need to see my psychiatrist."
She looked over at the elf she had been talking to. "You take over party preparations."
"But - but -"
"Don't 'but' the Queen of Lothlorien!" snapped Galadriel, and left to have an - uh - appointment.
The elf, who's name was Tenuvian, stared after Galadriel in shock, and then roused Lorien's inhabitants.
"I want chips, dip, soda, music, a DJ, everything!" yelled Tenuvian. "This party needs to be a REAL par-tay!"
Then he began dancing. "Get low, get low, get low, get low," he sang, "To the windooooow, to the walls! To the sweat run down by balls! Down these females crawl!"
The elves, now and again glancing sideways at Tenuvian to make sure he was sane, got to work, and after they were done - let's just say the Shirefolk could never compete with THIS party, baby.
"Tig."
"Tag."
"Double Tig."
"You can't Double Tig a Tag! Now you've got to pull my boxers down and act like an elephant."
Merry and Pippin had FINALLY stopped singing, (to Elrond's delight) and were continuously poking one another on the shoulder and saying "tig" and "tag". Apparently it was some sort of game.
"You see," said Aragorn, indicating Merry and Pippin, speaking as if he were on the Discovery Channel, "The mating habits of these bizarre creatures..."
"We're not gay," interrupted Merry, glaring at Aragorn. "That's Frodo and Sam."
"Hey!" snarled Sam, brandishing his frying pan. "At least I'm not Legolas, being all girly and prissy and... heck, his bedroom's covered in flowers!"
Legolas whipped out his white knives. "What did you say?"
Sam gulped. "Noth-"
"He said that YOU were the gay one," said Frodo, stepping in front of Sam, "We've all seen the way you look at Gimli."
"WHAT???" shouted Legolas, turning red.
"Yeah," said Eomer, "Remember when we first met? I threatened to kill Gimli and you threatened to kill me."
Legolas turned even redder. "We're FRIENDS, you idiot!"
"And have you seen the way he looks when Aragorn touches his shoulder..." Faramir whispered to Elrohir.
"ENOUGH!" shouted Aragorn. "I think we ALL know who's the gay one in Rivendell."
Everyone looked at him.
He looked around at them, and whispered, "Elrond."
Everyone turned around to look at Elrond.
He was crouched on the ground, crawling around and chasing a squirrel.
"Must - have - SQUIRREL!!!"
"Yep," said Merry, "You're right, Aragorn."
"For once," muttered Pippin.
Aragorn, having heard that last comment, lunged at Pippin with a loud "RAAAAAR!!" and Pippin and Merry dashed out of the way, and they ran the rest of the way to Lorien, everyone in Rivendell chasing after them.