First of all, thanks to the reviewers! Although not many, I'm glad at least
two people seem to think this FF's good ;;;Thank you so much, if no one
would have reviewed at all I really would have thought about cancelling
this fic... Okay, next chapter! I'm at work... I don't know but I think 90%
of my Fanfictions were written at work... (Some people could think I don't
have enough to do here. Hm. They're right I guess ;;;) Whatever, here
comes chapter two! Again X's POV (I think the whole story will be...)
Did I mention I was inspired by some of the X/Zero FFs here on FF.net? And before I forget, the characters are not mine. Unfortunately...
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I must look like I haven't slept for years although it was just one night. I actually didn't even close an eye. I look at the clock, only 5 in the morning. I decide to walk around HQ a bit. Better than staying here and think about what happened yesterday some more hours.
I head to the cafeteria. If I'm already up I can have a look there just as well and get something to eat. On my way, I almost walk into a person.
"Hey, watch it! Oh, X, it's you. Why are you up so early?" "Morning Alia... I'm sorry, guess I just didn't see you." "No wonder. You're eyes are almost closed! Did you sleep at all?" "Not really. But I'm not tired anyway. I wanted to get me something to eat." She frowns. "X, everything alright? I've never seen you like this!"
I just don't get it! How is everyone realizing at once that I've got something bothering me? Am I that easy to be seen through? Can't she reckon I'm just... hum... overworked or something?
"X? X!" "What?!" Yeah, caught daydreaming again. That really betters my case I guess... "Really X, what's up with you? You should go having Lifesaver check you!" "No Alia, it's nothing! Just lack of sleep I told you. I'll get something to eat now and then try to sleep once again okay?" "If you think... But be careful okay? Don't rush things..."
With that, she's off. Don't rush things? What the heck was that supposed to mean? Better ignore it, I've got enough things on my mind right now...
...
Same place, other time. I've been here this morning and met Alia. I told her I would try to sleep once more, but I didn't. I just knew I couldn't so I didn't bother to try at all. I wonder where Zero is... I haven't seen him all day... And just when I think this, I hear the familiar voice.
I smile at once without really noticing it and take a short run around the corner to see Zero and – Iris... Of all people, of course, he had to be with her again. Just great I decided to run there, now I couldn't try to sneak off unheard because they already caught sight of me.
"X! Hey I already wondered where you've been all day!" Zero smiles. "You didn't take another walk out alone did you?"
He looks like a big brother who's assuming me to ignore his orders. "Of course not... Hi Iris..."
Nice answer. I defended myself like a little boy plus greeted my worst enemy. This just occurred to me yesterday.
"Hi X! Had a nice sleep?" She smiles as she always does. But since the change of situation it was now, I couldn't help but think that this smile looks really false... I suddenly feel the urge of torturing her... violently.. VERY violently... what am I thinking?! This isn't like me. But the more I think about it the more tempting it sounds. I smile to myseld inside.
"What kind of question was that Iris?!" I look up. Zero looks at her as if he wants to slap her right in the face or something.
"What do you mean?" "You can see very clearly he hasn't slept well! If he had slept anyway."
Iris took another look at me. I feel very uncomfortable being the topic of this conversation.
"Am I right X?" "What? Ah, yes! I mean, I tried... But I couldn't sleep. Whatever..."
Damn! Would I ever be able to talk to Zero again in a normal way? This is really annoying!
For a few seconds nobody says anything. And for all persons who could have put an end to this, it is Iris...
"So, Zero, what about tonight?"
Tonight?? Don't tell me they are dating again! Once a week... No wait, once a month or so should be more than enough!! ... Jeez I'm glad I got myself so far under control I didn't say that to her... even if I wanted to. More than that, I would have liked to just link arms with Zero going away with him leaving Iris behind to see her stupid face! Unfortunately I don't dare to do so...
"Today? Again?" Zero asked. I look confused. Was he reading my mind?!
"Yes! What's wrong with that?"
"Hm, let's see. Let's ask X!"
Me?? But why –
"So X, what do you think? Should I date Iris tonight or rather not?"
The two of them look at me waiting for my statement. Iris seems not to sure if she should be angry about that or hopeful. At last she decided to give me a begging look. Just great, hit me at my weak spot, my conscience... I wonder why it still works when she is looking at me like that. That shouldn't affect me in any way after the thoughts of giving her as much pain as possible recently.
"W- why do you ask me anyway? It's your decision!" "Come on X! Think!"
I wonder if there's a camera hidden somewhere. What's his point? Oh and for heaven's sake, could Iris just stop looking so pitiful??
"Well... I think..." If I wouldn't care what would happen after my answer I would have just said no of course. I simply don't want them to be together. But I did care, unfortunately...
"Well??" Zero grins. He must know what I'm about to answer. So I better get over with it.
"Okay, I think you should go."
Proud of myself letting this out sounding almost as if I didn't care I was pretty sure to have exactly said what Zero wanted to hear. Just to see his jaw drop and Iris jumping happily around. Now I am really confused.
"Yay!! Thanks X! Zero's so weird sometimes! He said he wouldn't go anywhere without asking you!"
Not enough with that, she hugs me. What have I done? Zero doesn't look to pleased either. His look changes from surprise to anger. Luckily Iris doesn't see that. Although somehow I wish she could...
Suddenly Zero pulls Iris away from me. If he knows what kind of favour this is?
"Hey X, don't be foolish!" Now he's laughing. I wonder if this is a Zero from another dimension who kidnapped my Zero who was held prison now somewhere...
"But wha-" "You know pretty well what I mean!" He glares at me. With my newest consideration of the Zero impostor I feel slightly uncomfortable by this. Iris just looks puzzled now.
"You know what I mean! Man, X, you're such a nice guy, but you don't have to do that for me!"
I really have no idea what he's talking about. But I guess it's better not to respond now. Not yet.
"What are you two talking about??"
The two of us? If Iris knew I am as clueless as her she would be even more confused than me.
"I'm talking about our date!"
Silence. Zero looks at me and grins. Now it's Iris turn to jaw-drop. I feel the confusion has reached its maximum. I just hope that Zero would explain this, because if I ask what he's talking about the maximum of confusion would be... oh this is getting really ridiculous!
"It's really really nice of you that you want to do me a favour, but I didn't ask for that. You don't have to cancel our date, if I may call it so, just to let me go out with Iris!"
"Ehm...." Thankfully Zero just goes on talking before I have to make up something to say.
"You know Iris, X and I wanted to go out tonight, having fun in the city and stuff!"
Zero puts his arm around me... I slightly blush and look down before anyone sees it. "Oh... Is that so... X?"
Damn! Iris wants my statement! I look up to Zero for help. As he pointed out just the day before, I can't lie. Well, I guess I could manage as it would be exactly what I wanted in this case – Zero not going out with her - but I have troubles getting myself to do so.
"What's wrong with you Iris? Don't you believe me? Come on X, we've got stuff to get ready for tonight! See ya Iris!"
And with this he just turns around pulling me with him, leaving Iris very confused, and I'm sure, upset.
When I'm sure she couldn't hear us any more, I stop. No matter how much I dislike Iris or I'm happy about that secretly, that was just not fair.
"What's up X?" "Zero, what's with all this?" "What do you mean?" "You know just too well what I'm talking about! This wasn't very nice of you! Getting rid of Iris just like that! I think you like her?" Zero doesn't smile any more. "So what? Don't you think it's my decision who I want to go out with?!" "Of course it is! And that's exactly why I'm asking myself why you wanted me to decide this for you!"
Checkmate! I got Zero cornered. Let's see how he'll try to get out of this.
"Is it such a bad thing to take your best friend's advice? Anyway, if you like her so much, why don't you go out with her tonight?!"
His arm was no longer around me. Meanwhile he looks furious. What did I do to him? It seems that whatever I do is wrong. I don't want him to be angry at me. Especially not because of Iris! I'd like to tell him how relieved I felt when he said he wouldn't go out with her tonight.
"Why did you say I should go out with her tonight?"
This question completely took me by surprise. Why does he want to know that?
"Well... I... I just didn't know what to say..." "Yesterday you told me you'd get too few time with me, and here I offer you the chance to change that and what do you do?" "Jeez I'm sorry! I just thought you wanted to go out with her." "Why would I have asked you if I really wanted to date her?" "Why do you ask me such weird questions? See, she looked so upset when you asked me if you should date. I couldn't bring myself to say you shouldn't go out." "Couldn't bring yourself? So you actually didn't want me to go out with her?"
Alert!! Trap!! Gotta watch out! GAHHH!!!
"No no no!!! What I wanted to say was... That... I just thought it wasn't fair to dump her just like that... And... She's your girlfriend at all..."
I don't get the chance to say anything else. Zeros face changed the last time in this conversation, this time to really disappointed. I wonder why. I didn't say anything that could have disappointed him, did I? Without saying another word he walks away, leaving me still confused. Why do I even care?? Angry at Zero and myself, I walk off in the other direction.
...
I'm lying on my bed, just watching the ceiling. Several hours had passed since Zero left me standing in the hallway. I still wonder what I've said that had gotten him so angry.
A hesitant knocking on my door pulled me back to reality. I really do daydream a lot the last days...
"Come in."
The moment I say this I wonder why I didn't ask who it was first. Somehow I just hoped it would be Zero. When the door opens, I smile. It was him!
"Hi X... can we talk?" "Sure. Come in."
I get to sit on my bed allowing Zero to sit down next to me.
"See, I'm sorry! For what happened before." "Me too."
He looks confused.
"What should you be sorry for?" "You know, what I said! What made you angry at me and go away." "And that would be?" "Well..."
Truth is, I still don't know.
"There! That's what I mean. You don't even know what you did. And I know you didn't say anything to hurt me or something, and if, you didn't mean to. So you don't have to apologize for anything. I have to, because I got you into that weird situation with Iris by asking you what you think of our date. And worse, leaving you back like that when you didn't even know what you've done."
Nice. Thanks a lot Zero. I really wonder if I should go on setting new higher limits for confusion all the time. I think I just wait for it to increase. As much as I learned today, confusion is unlimited.
"Am I confusing you?" "What? Oh, just a bit..."
Jerk. He knows pretty well he's confusing me with this nonsense he's talking! Why doesn't he just come out with it and tells me what I said that made him so angry?
"So, what about our little date tonight?" "WHAT?" "X, don't you always act like I'm going to rape you or something! You know what I mean! How about going to the city and have some fun?" "Oh, okay..."
Of course, deep inside, my heart jumps.
"And guess what! I might tell you what got me angry earlier!"
He grins stupidly. What's that about? Is it such a secret? I don't care anymore, if there's any chance to get at least a bit less confused I'd take it.
"Okay, let's go then."
I get up, waiting for Zero to come. He's still grinning. Must be really funny to have a secret...
Did I mention I was inspired by some of the X/Zero FFs here on FF.net? And before I forget, the characters are not mine. Unfortunately...
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I must look like I haven't slept for years although it was just one night. I actually didn't even close an eye. I look at the clock, only 5 in the morning. I decide to walk around HQ a bit. Better than staying here and think about what happened yesterday some more hours.
I head to the cafeteria. If I'm already up I can have a look there just as well and get something to eat. On my way, I almost walk into a person.
"Hey, watch it! Oh, X, it's you. Why are you up so early?" "Morning Alia... I'm sorry, guess I just didn't see you." "No wonder. You're eyes are almost closed! Did you sleep at all?" "Not really. But I'm not tired anyway. I wanted to get me something to eat." She frowns. "X, everything alright? I've never seen you like this!"
I just don't get it! How is everyone realizing at once that I've got something bothering me? Am I that easy to be seen through? Can't she reckon I'm just... hum... overworked or something?
"X? X!" "What?!" Yeah, caught daydreaming again. That really betters my case I guess... "Really X, what's up with you? You should go having Lifesaver check you!" "No Alia, it's nothing! Just lack of sleep I told you. I'll get something to eat now and then try to sleep once again okay?" "If you think... But be careful okay? Don't rush things..."
With that, she's off. Don't rush things? What the heck was that supposed to mean? Better ignore it, I've got enough things on my mind right now...
...
Same place, other time. I've been here this morning and met Alia. I told her I would try to sleep once more, but I didn't. I just knew I couldn't so I didn't bother to try at all. I wonder where Zero is... I haven't seen him all day... And just when I think this, I hear the familiar voice.
I smile at once without really noticing it and take a short run around the corner to see Zero and – Iris... Of all people, of course, he had to be with her again. Just great I decided to run there, now I couldn't try to sneak off unheard because they already caught sight of me.
"X! Hey I already wondered where you've been all day!" Zero smiles. "You didn't take another walk out alone did you?"
He looks like a big brother who's assuming me to ignore his orders. "Of course not... Hi Iris..."
Nice answer. I defended myself like a little boy plus greeted my worst enemy. This just occurred to me yesterday.
"Hi X! Had a nice sleep?" She smiles as she always does. But since the change of situation it was now, I couldn't help but think that this smile looks really false... I suddenly feel the urge of torturing her... violently.. VERY violently... what am I thinking?! This isn't like me. But the more I think about it the more tempting it sounds. I smile to myseld inside.
"What kind of question was that Iris?!" I look up. Zero looks at her as if he wants to slap her right in the face or something.
"What do you mean?" "You can see very clearly he hasn't slept well! If he had slept anyway."
Iris took another look at me. I feel very uncomfortable being the topic of this conversation.
"Am I right X?" "What? Ah, yes! I mean, I tried... But I couldn't sleep. Whatever..."
Damn! Would I ever be able to talk to Zero again in a normal way? This is really annoying!
For a few seconds nobody says anything. And for all persons who could have put an end to this, it is Iris...
"So, Zero, what about tonight?"
Tonight?? Don't tell me they are dating again! Once a week... No wait, once a month or so should be more than enough!! ... Jeez I'm glad I got myself so far under control I didn't say that to her... even if I wanted to. More than that, I would have liked to just link arms with Zero going away with him leaving Iris behind to see her stupid face! Unfortunately I don't dare to do so...
"Today? Again?" Zero asked. I look confused. Was he reading my mind?!
"Yes! What's wrong with that?"
"Hm, let's see. Let's ask X!"
Me?? But why –
"So X, what do you think? Should I date Iris tonight or rather not?"
The two of them look at me waiting for my statement. Iris seems not to sure if she should be angry about that or hopeful. At last she decided to give me a begging look. Just great, hit me at my weak spot, my conscience... I wonder why it still works when she is looking at me like that. That shouldn't affect me in any way after the thoughts of giving her as much pain as possible recently.
"W- why do you ask me anyway? It's your decision!" "Come on X! Think!"
I wonder if there's a camera hidden somewhere. What's his point? Oh and for heaven's sake, could Iris just stop looking so pitiful??
"Well... I think..." If I wouldn't care what would happen after my answer I would have just said no of course. I simply don't want them to be together. But I did care, unfortunately...
"Well??" Zero grins. He must know what I'm about to answer. So I better get over with it.
"Okay, I think you should go."
Proud of myself letting this out sounding almost as if I didn't care I was pretty sure to have exactly said what Zero wanted to hear. Just to see his jaw drop and Iris jumping happily around. Now I am really confused.
"Yay!! Thanks X! Zero's so weird sometimes! He said he wouldn't go anywhere without asking you!"
Not enough with that, she hugs me. What have I done? Zero doesn't look to pleased either. His look changes from surprise to anger. Luckily Iris doesn't see that. Although somehow I wish she could...
Suddenly Zero pulls Iris away from me. If he knows what kind of favour this is?
"Hey X, don't be foolish!" Now he's laughing. I wonder if this is a Zero from another dimension who kidnapped my Zero who was held prison now somewhere...
"But wha-" "You know pretty well what I mean!" He glares at me. With my newest consideration of the Zero impostor I feel slightly uncomfortable by this. Iris just looks puzzled now.
"You know what I mean! Man, X, you're such a nice guy, but you don't have to do that for me!"
I really have no idea what he's talking about. But I guess it's better not to respond now. Not yet.
"What are you two talking about??"
The two of us? If Iris knew I am as clueless as her she would be even more confused than me.
"I'm talking about our date!"
Silence. Zero looks at me and grins. Now it's Iris turn to jaw-drop. I feel the confusion has reached its maximum. I just hope that Zero would explain this, because if I ask what he's talking about the maximum of confusion would be... oh this is getting really ridiculous!
"It's really really nice of you that you want to do me a favour, but I didn't ask for that. You don't have to cancel our date, if I may call it so, just to let me go out with Iris!"
"Ehm...." Thankfully Zero just goes on talking before I have to make up something to say.
"You know Iris, X and I wanted to go out tonight, having fun in the city and stuff!"
Zero puts his arm around me... I slightly blush and look down before anyone sees it. "Oh... Is that so... X?"
Damn! Iris wants my statement! I look up to Zero for help. As he pointed out just the day before, I can't lie. Well, I guess I could manage as it would be exactly what I wanted in this case – Zero not going out with her - but I have troubles getting myself to do so.
"What's wrong with you Iris? Don't you believe me? Come on X, we've got stuff to get ready for tonight! See ya Iris!"
And with this he just turns around pulling me with him, leaving Iris very confused, and I'm sure, upset.
When I'm sure she couldn't hear us any more, I stop. No matter how much I dislike Iris or I'm happy about that secretly, that was just not fair.
"What's up X?" "Zero, what's with all this?" "What do you mean?" "You know just too well what I'm talking about! This wasn't very nice of you! Getting rid of Iris just like that! I think you like her?" Zero doesn't smile any more. "So what? Don't you think it's my decision who I want to go out with?!" "Of course it is! And that's exactly why I'm asking myself why you wanted me to decide this for you!"
Checkmate! I got Zero cornered. Let's see how he'll try to get out of this.
"Is it such a bad thing to take your best friend's advice? Anyway, if you like her so much, why don't you go out with her tonight?!"
His arm was no longer around me. Meanwhile he looks furious. What did I do to him? It seems that whatever I do is wrong. I don't want him to be angry at me. Especially not because of Iris! I'd like to tell him how relieved I felt when he said he wouldn't go out with her tonight.
"Why did you say I should go out with her tonight?"
This question completely took me by surprise. Why does he want to know that?
"Well... I... I just didn't know what to say..." "Yesterday you told me you'd get too few time with me, and here I offer you the chance to change that and what do you do?" "Jeez I'm sorry! I just thought you wanted to go out with her." "Why would I have asked you if I really wanted to date her?" "Why do you ask me such weird questions? See, she looked so upset when you asked me if you should date. I couldn't bring myself to say you shouldn't go out." "Couldn't bring yourself? So you actually didn't want me to go out with her?"
Alert!! Trap!! Gotta watch out! GAHHH!!!
"No no no!!! What I wanted to say was... That... I just thought it wasn't fair to dump her just like that... And... She's your girlfriend at all..."
I don't get the chance to say anything else. Zeros face changed the last time in this conversation, this time to really disappointed. I wonder why. I didn't say anything that could have disappointed him, did I? Without saying another word he walks away, leaving me still confused. Why do I even care?? Angry at Zero and myself, I walk off in the other direction.
...
I'm lying on my bed, just watching the ceiling. Several hours had passed since Zero left me standing in the hallway. I still wonder what I've said that had gotten him so angry.
A hesitant knocking on my door pulled me back to reality. I really do daydream a lot the last days...
"Come in."
The moment I say this I wonder why I didn't ask who it was first. Somehow I just hoped it would be Zero. When the door opens, I smile. It was him!
"Hi X... can we talk?" "Sure. Come in."
I get to sit on my bed allowing Zero to sit down next to me.
"See, I'm sorry! For what happened before." "Me too."
He looks confused.
"What should you be sorry for?" "You know, what I said! What made you angry at me and go away." "And that would be?" "Well..."
Truth is, I still don't know.
"There! That's what I mean. You don't even know what you did. And I know you didn't say anything to hurt me or something, and if, you didn't mean to. So you don't have to apologize for anything. I have to, because I got you into that weird situation with Iris by asking you what you think of our date. And worse, leaving you back like that when you didn't even know what you've done."
Nice. Thanks a lot Zero. I really wonder if I should go on setting new higher limits for confusion all the time. I think I just wait for it to increase. As much as I learned today, confusion is unlimited.
"Am I confusing you?" "What? Oh, just a bit..."
Jerk. He knows pretty well he's confusing me with this nonsense he's talking! Why doesn't he just come out with it and tells me what I said that made him so angry?
"So, what about our little date tonight?" "WHAT?" "X, don't you always act like I'm going to rape you or something! You know what I mean! How about going to the city and have some fun?" "Oh, okay..."
Of course, deep inside, my heart jumps.
"And guess what! I might tell you what got me angry earlier!"
He grins stupidly. What's that about? Is it such a secret? I don't care anymore, if there's any chance to get at least a bit less confused I'd take it.
"Okay, let's go then."
I get up, waiting for Zero to come. He's still grinning. Must be really funny to have a secret...