Kay im finally updating again for the people who actually like this story. This is just gonna be a small chapter cause I think I need to know what Pony's job is first (suggestions!!! I have no idea!!!!!!!!!!!). And yeah this is a scene takin' out of the movie Igby Goes Down. I watched it recently. It's pretty good.
Oh and when I was bout to write this I went to go turn on the tv, coz the house was eerily quiet, and igby was on!! Coincidence! I think not!...okay yeah it most likely is.
P.S Gamaliel im sorry if I offended you or somethin. Yeah you made a good point bout Darry so I'll shine him in a better light (but not from Johnny's pov! Johnny still hates him). But saying he's the hero of the book was exaggerating it jusssst a bit don't you think? Don't flame me!!
PP.S lol MrsHoldenCaulfield. I type "oh god" a lot lol. And most likely, this chapter may have a few...

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Ponyboy's Pov

I was having the best dream. Jill was alive again and we were just talking, laughing, holding hands, staring at each other with those goofy smiles. It was just so normal. Like it was so much like reality instead of a dream, though it was a dream...you get me? They should call those types of dreams- drealitys.

But all good dreams can't last forever and the sun crept through my curtains and burned my eyes till my dream faded away in a bright light. I had to wake up.

I tossed and turned for a while hoping (praying) to somehow fall back into my peaceful sleep and reunite with my Jilly in my dreality.

But it was hopeless and my alarm clock also turned against me and set off. Oh man, the start of a new day. Another day without Jill.

I rolled off and switched it off. I sat up and rubbed my eyes. I glared at that damn window and then got out of bed.

I dragged myself into the bathroom. The cold tiles were like ice to my feet and stepping onto the soggy mat wasn't exactly great either.

I opened the shower door and twisted the knobs till I got the right temperature.

I stood back and closed the door to take off my clothes. Then got in.

It was really refreshing to have the warm water run down my aching body. Taking a shower always helped ease my emotional pain.

I soaped up my body and my thoughts drifted off again to Jill. I still remember the first day I met her...

Flashback!

I ran down the street, not caring I was ditching track. I had to go. I couldn't be at school anymore. It just hurt to much to see him there.

I ran as fast as I could, my coach would be proud if he could see me now to see how fast I was going and how much effort I was putting into it.

I just had to keep going faster. Maybe if I ran fast enough, a car will come by when im running across the road and not see me, then they'll run me over and I won't have to face this pain I felt for him no more.

Or maybe even more far-fetched I would run so fast that a giant wormhole will open up and swallow me, and I would enter into another dimension! Possibly the future, so then I would have gotten over this a long time ago.

I ran down to the lot, then just collapsed to the ground under a tree and cried. God, why does everyone I love leave me?! Don't I deserve to be loved!

"Hey...are you okay?"

I wiped away my tears quickly and looked up.

The sun was shining down on her like an angel.

She tilted her head and asked again, "what's wrong?"

Gosh, she was beautiful. But a real innocent beauty. She had to be a soc. But then again, why would I soc give me the time of day?

Her cheeks turned to a light blush, and she looked away, escaping a small tiny giggle from her lips.

I wondered why she reacted like that, and I realised it must have been cause I was staring at her...and still am.

I looked down quickly.

"Um...I dunno. Just nothing really I guess." I shrugged.

"I'm Jill," she said sweetly.

I looked up at her again, "I'm Ponyboy."

She looked at me sort of strangely for a second or two, then something I didn't recognise.

"Yes, that is my real name," I said a little frustrated.

She bit her bottom lip, and then sat down beside me.

I could smell her shampoo. It made me smile 'cause it smelt like apples, and I like apples.

The sting I felt for him, wasn't as intense since Jill turned up. I'd like to keep her around.

"So what made you so upset?" She asked again. It was kind of irritating. I didn't answer the first two times...get a hint!

"Um..." I made up something quick, "I tripped." Okay, I could have taken a little bit more time to make up something.

She chuckled and when I looked at her, she tried to hold it in.

"Sorry," she said, holding her mouth trying to keep in her laughter.

I smiled.

"Well, how badly did you trip? Did you like full on fall, and hurt your knee's or something?"

I rolled my eyes, still smiling.

"Would you like me to kiss them for you?" She then couldn't hold it in anymore and burst out laughing.

She tried to apologize and stop through fits of laughter, but she just couldn't.

I laughed too, though I didn't think it was all that funny, but there was something 'bout this girl that made me feel simply happy. Like I didn't have to worry about him anymore.

After she calmed down, and wiped away her tears that had came from the laughter she took me by surprise and said, "wanna go to the movies on Saturday?"

My eyes widened. I barely knew her and she was askin' me out! Maybe it's just a friends thing...or a sympathy thing for me "tripping".

"Um...sure," I nodded, still dumbfounded by it.

She grinned, "cool!"

End of Flashback

I smiled and sighed happily. If only I could turn back time and re-live some of those moments with her all over again. Man, we were just Michael's age back then.

Tears came back again as I thought about her more. I began to hit my head against the tile wall of the shower. Not hard enough to actually really hurt me, but just enough to show the shower my tormented frustration.

My thoughts somehow wondered over to Johnny and I remembered I was meant to decide whether or not Johnny could stay here a couple of days.

I didn't want him to because I didn't trust myself with him at this vulnerable stage of my life.

I know he's my bestfriend and I can't kick him out onto the streets if he truly has nowhere to go, but I just can't have him around.

I got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist.

I went over to the sink to shave, and noticed how I didn't recognise the person staring back at me.

Had I really gotten that old? I had the odd strand of grey through my hair...most likely caused from those nights Michael stayed out all night without me knowing where he was, or not even a phone call from him. I tend to panick a lot 'bout his safety, but I guess that's because he's my only child so I'm just a littleeee protective.

I gripped my hair and my breathing got more heavy. I stared down at my shaver sitting there next to the sink.

I was so distressed over Jill and wasn't sure if I could go on without her, or even raise Michael as a single father. It would be so much easier to grab the blade out of that damn shaver and end it all so that way I wont have to face my problems.

"Ponyboy?" It was Johnny. He knocked on the door.

I tried to sound calm, "yeah?"

"Michael hasn't gotten out of bed yet and I was wonderin' if he should be?"

I took in a deep breath and nodded, "yeah he is."

"Want me to wake him up?" He offered.

I smiled, "yeah. Thanks, Johnny."

"No problem, Pony." And I listened to him leave.

I had forgotten how refreshing it was just to have him there. No! Ponyboy, it's just your sudden loneliness after Jill dieing, talkin'.

I picked up the shaver. I was a full gown man, yet I still found it hard to face my problems. How can people thrive on the thought of a challenge?

But I couldn't run away this time, no matter how badly I wanted to. I've got responsibilities now and a kid to look after. Time to grow up, Pony.

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Okay, it wasn't as short as I expected it to be. And it also turned out nothing like Igby Goes Down in my opinion. There were some similarities but nothing too much that would get me sued for copyright.

reunite with my Jilly in my dreality. Lol!!! I just had to add dreality. People who read this are probably gonna think im so stupid.

REVIEWS PLEASEEEEEEE!!!!!! (unless it's flames or mean constructive critism. If it's constructive critism you're giving, do it in a very nice way, so I don't take it the wrong way). I just like to know if you've read it. I love reviews (good reviews!!). Okay now go review please lol....(hmm...did that whole review my story thing come off as a little too desperate?)

Also, for the people who didn't get the chapter name...or took it a dirty way;) lol, it's a reference to Igby Goes Down...yeah get it, Ponyboy Goes Down, Igby Goes Down, Pony, Igby, I switched the names, eh eh get it! I'm just gonna Shutup now...