Heeelloooo!! Since today's the fourth Advent today, I'll upload a new Chap for you And on Christmas (Saturday) You'll get the seventh!!! So only two more missing Yeah I actually had LOTS of fun with the last chapter, that's why it got so long I think… I just couldn't stop myself to protract that thing with Zero arranging a date for X with Iris chuckle Don't forget, I HATE Iris wholeheartedly!! But she's just a great character to use for the plot (every story needs an idiot. G That's why I'm making her like the silly, stupid little girl – which I think she actually is…) I hope no Iris-Lovers will flame me now ;;; Please review and tell me if you hate me now.
Oh and btw, I wanted to say something to
some reviewers:
Freaky person: I just interpret you're still liking the story, right? Sorry to give you a heart attac with the last chap ;; Couln'T restrain myself kinda... XD
Private: Ehm. well. Thanks for reading anyway if you don'T like Yaoi. But I just remind you I said in the first chap already that it'S yaoi, if you don'T like it, don't read it. And if you do, don't blame me. This is no offence, I feel complimented that you're reading it anyway XD But Don't be too sure to see through me. You don't know what Zero really knows or thinks. I'd like to tell you that I won'T change anything already written because of any comments, since the story is already finished (9 chaps,written in September I think..) So just wait and sees. Ah, and sure I know BnG XD Who doesn't?
Gamegirl: Glad you like it XD Can'T wait for your last chapter!
wandering life: Thanks, I love English but it's still not my mother language ;;; And as long as it'S good enough to read, I think it's okay. I hope it's not toooo bad ;;; I guess I confuse the tenses a lot. But I do that in any language when I write stories somehow ;;;
Dark X and Dark Zero: Yeah I'm MEAN XDDDD But hey I love X and Zero, do you reaaaally think I'd leave them like that? ... (Btw I love you too so get Zeal to update your story! XD)
Vorzahk-vahki-tamer: Well... thanks I will!
So, that'S enough now, on with the story!-- X's POV…
My jaw drops open. I don't even know if I should cry or laugh. This is just too paradox! He can't be serious! First I still stare unbelievingly at the sight in front of me. Iris. Smiling happily. Then I turn my glance to Zero, who seems to smile as well due to my expression. He must have loads of fun right now.
"Zero…. That… you… I mean… are you serious?!"
"Just listen to him, isn't he funny?" He slaps me on the back laughing which causes me to fall over because he did it a little harder than he might have intended. I cough. After I get up again, he whispers to me now so only I can hear him.
"See X, you don't have to hide it anymore! I figured out that you must have a crush on Iris!"
"How would you?!" I almost yell at him. He looks surprised, still whispering.
"You ask? C'mon, I know you! That talking nonsense stuff, being jealous when I was dating her… It's just soooo obvious!" he grins.
I can't believe it… And all the time I thought he found out I'm jealous af HER and not of HIM. But I've been so sure he… hm… come to think about it. It's true. All the things I said, all my actions could also be seen as if I would have had a crush on Iris and not on Zero, not wanting them together and stuff. Maybe I just thought it the other way because I WANTED to believe he could like me the same way…
So it turns out that Zero just was so sad and disappointed in those situations because he thought he hurt me when being with Iris even if he didn't even like her and I did. So he thought. It's still nothing more than friendship for him. Big surprise. I should have known…
"So are you two going to stare at each other much longer or can we leave now, X?"
Iris. I shiver. What shall I do? It's already giving me the creeps she's here, and now going out with her?! NEVER! She's my enemy!!
I look at Zero. He seems kinda proud of his arrangement. He still seems to think he's done me a favour. I sigh. Okay, for Zero's sake… I can't disappoint him, can I? I force myself to smile. It hurts in my cheeks... Must look pretty stupid though.
"Okay then. Let's go Iris." I say that through gritted teeth. I just can't help. While leaving I turn around to Zero once again.
"Uhm… thanks… Zero… I guess…"
"You're welcome pal!"
He really thinks I'm happy now I guess… He's smiling after all. I turn around once again. What's that? Does he look down to the floor? Is there something? I can't see it from here, but as he notices I look at him he looks up and smiles again, waving happily. Maybe really something lying on the floor. Why should I care anymore? Now I gotta get this date over somehow… I sigh again.
So that's what he meant when he said he had to force himself to arrange that and that I would have to get it going myself afterwards because he wouldn't do it again. I can perfectly understand how it must have been for him asking Iris to date me after he yelled at her like that. I don't think he ever wanted to talk to her again after that.
Whatever, Iris seems to be happy. Wasn't she in love with Zero? Wait, why don't I put a good face on the matter and take my chance to find out something more about what happened between them? Yeah X, you're scaring me! You're turning into a real bad boy if you continue like this! Hey, didn't Zero say some time ago he liked me to be a bit more rude instead of too decent? That would be two birds one stone! Jeez, I'm really a god I guess…
As we're heading to the city, I try to start a conversation.
"Hey… well… so… how are you?" Great. I'm the master of conversation…
"Oh, just fine, thanks X!"
Yeah. Wonderful. Who cares? I don't even want to talk to her… I hate her!! But I gotta make this sacrafice in order to find out if she and Zero kissed… While I'm thinking we're passing that bar I was at with Zero the day before and I stop.
"You don't want to go HERE, do you?" Iris looks very disgusted.
"Well, where do you want to go?" I strongly supress the urge to slap her. Insulting OUR place like that!! This was where I got drunk and Zero carried me home… I sigh. I'm really losing it I'm afraid… thinking of this like a romantic memory of a walk at the beach or something… Now I chuckle.
"What's wrong with you X?"
"What? Did you say something?"
"Yes!! I just answered you're question and you're not even listening!"
Wheee daydreaming has its advantages I guess! Actually I think I could have lots of fun with Iris… of course in another way than she might like. Ahh I'm so evil!! Beeing a jerk is cool indeed! Maybe I never tried before because I don't want to be a jerk to Zero, and I almost only hang around with him. Well, I just decided to give it a try on Iris with being rude! Might get extra points from Zero for that.
"So, okay, what did you say?" She sighs.
"I said I'd like to go to that neat little café over there."
Oh man that's sooo typical…
"Sure, why not?" I force a smile. By now I already wonder how Zero could stand this… he dated her more than once and is way more tense than I am. And if he even really dislikes her so much, how could he survive dates with her? She's already driving ME crazy after a few minutes only!
Anyways, she happily grabs my arm and drags me into that café. As we enter, there are a few couples looking curious at us. Great. Now everybody here thinks we're together for sure … Even worse, everybody knows us… we're kinda famous… and some of them are already starting to whisper. Oh Zero I think I really understand how you felt… And I think I got a clue now how all these rumors came up…
"Let's sit down here!" She leads us to a table right in the middle of the café, looking around before sitting down. I'm so sure she took this table because everybody can see us perfectly from here. If I would have decided, we would sit somewhere behind a pillar or something…
The waitress comes to ask us what we'd like to drink.
"We'd like a milkshake, please!" Iris says. Did I just hear that?!
"Pardon me?!"
"You like milkshakes, right?"
"Well, first, I'd like to order on my own! Second, why only one milkshake for the both of us?? And third and most important: I HATE milkshakes!!"
Wow. Must have been good. Really EVERYBODY is watching us now. The stupid giggle from the waitress at Iris' order vanished immediately. Nobody's saying anything, Iris just looks bewildered.
"I'd like to have a beer. You have that?"
Strike again! Iris jaw drops under the table! I chuckle inwardly.
"Ehm… yes sir, sure…" The waitress gets away quickly. Iris still looks bewildered.
"X, what's wrong with you?! Since when do you drink beer?"
"Why do you wanna know? I like it. Period."
"I don't know you like this X… you act so… rude…" She looks sad. Normally I would feel concerned, but I don't. My pleasure if she's upset! Thanks to her Zero will probably never get the clue that I'm in love with him and not her… Which reminds me!
"Say, Iris, how come you're going out with me?" Now she looks confused. And she also blushes slightly. Man this behaviour is totally like me when I'm with Zero! I'm scared…
"Well.. Zero asked me if I'd go out with you because he thinks you would like to but don't dare to ask because you could think you're betraying him because I used to date him."
Let me get this straight. Just WHAT did he tell her?!? Gotta make a mental note to punish him for that! Jeez Iris must think I'm totally crazy about her! Hm. Okay, considering how I acted it's obvious I'm totally crazy about SOMEONE. Only Zero confused the target…
"But that's just it! You dated Zero all the time. I thought you love him? And now you're just going out with me all of a sudden."
"I don't really understand Zero as well… I mean, we had sooo much fun everytime we were out!"
I dare to doubt that. I wonder if the definition of "Fun" to Iris is another one than to Zero and me.
"But then…" Her look changes to really devastated. Maybe I shouldn't be AS rude… But only just a little nicer! Not much!
"Then what?" I try to sound calm.
"Well… don't know if you heard about it. But he yelled at me this morning very badly… and… broke up… I don't understand what's gotten into him! I thought he loved me!"
"Did you really think that?" I say this before I can even think about it.
"Yes, sure! Why do you ask? I mean, why would he have dated me all the time if we haven't been a couple?? Oh, now all my friends will laugh at me!"
She sobs. Great. What does she expect me to do now? Cheering her up? Serves her right. As far as I can see, she still believes they were together! So she actually did spread those rumors herself…
"Just what made you think you're a couple? Just going out sometimes? Haha, I mean that would mean you consider the both of us being a couple now as well! Imagine that! Haha!"
I really have fun at this thought. Nobody could really be that blue eyed, right? Wait! What's that? The way she looks… no… I gulp.
"You… DID think we're a couple because I'm going out with you… right?"
She doesn't say or do anything. I sweatdrop. What's with this girl?! She needs a psychiatrist!
"Listen Iris, you shouldn't make things like that up so fast! There's more to a relationship than dating!"
"Like what?"
"Jeez Iris! Are you trying to kid me??"
At this moment, the waitress comes, bringing our drinks.
"Thanks. Well, as I was about to say, you didn't mean that, right? I mean, are you really wondering why Zero freaked out?? How would you feel if someone told everyone you're in love with… let's say Douglas? Or Signas?"
"I would NEVER be in love with one of them!!! Isn't that obvious?? I'm way too cute for those… guys… who should believe such crap?"
"Well, when the concerned person itself is saying it?"
"But… but!"
"But what? Hey Iris, you understand pretty well what I'm talking about, you're not THAT stupid!"
Did I just say that? Actually I'm pretty sure she is…
"Of course I am not stupid! But what do you think there is more to a relationship, tell me!"
"Ehm, well.. for starters, there would be kissing…"
"And if there was?"
Hold it!! Hold it right there! Did she just say what I thought she said?
"Listen Iris." Now I look at her like a tiger who has cornered his prey. "Zero's my best friend, and I'm not very amused when there are rumors going around about him that make him feel bad in any way, understood?"
"Why should you care if we kissed? Wanna have him for yourself or what?!"
Eeeek!! If she knew how right she is! But hey, it's Iris, I don't really think she knows anything… Little fool…
"I care because he's my friend, as I said. And I know by chance that he wasn't to happy to hear that someone said you two kissed."
Okay, now it's out. Now she's gotta tell me the truth and I'll finally know! Iris looks very serious now.
"I didn't know this date was about talking about past relationships between me and Zero."
If I may mentally correct: never existing relationships. Thank you for listening.
"And what we did is completely our thing, no one else needs to know! That's private."
Hmph… dead end… But somehow I gotta get it out of her. I'll try the other direction.
"Okay Iris, I'm sorry. Let's just forget about that. How about finishing our drinks and go somewhere else? I mean, after all, if you were willing to go out with me, you must like me at least a bit, right?" I put on my sweetest smile. Got her!
"Oh X, you're so cute! I knew you'd understand!" She giggles. ARRRGG I still hate that! I force another smile with gritted teeth and almost break some by doing so.
We finish our drinks and leave the café. She links her arm with mine. Arg what other things do I have to do to get it out of her?!
"So, where do we go now X?"
"Anywhere you want." God I think I gotta puke.
"Ah you're sooo polite!! Zero never let me choose!"
"He didn't?" Guess he's more consequent than I am. After all, he's got the pride to stick to his opinion, as I am losing mine right now in playing Mr. Nice-guy to Iris…
"No, never. Come to think about it, I wonder why he even dated me all the time. I reaaally liked him you know, I mean, I wouldn't have kissed him if I didn't, but-"
"So you did?!"
Oh no! She said it… Well, my plan worked… Are girls always so weird?! If you ask them about something they just refuse to tell, but if you change the topic or don't show any interest, they'll tell you anything unasked…
"Yes. But that's not the point, because you know, Zero can be soooo weird sometimes! You're his friend so you sure know! Jeez why doesn't this guy give himself and others an easier time? I mean…"
And so she continues babbling. I already stopped listening since she mentioned that kiss. I can't believe it… Till the end I was sure it was just a rumor. And since Zero said kissing means more to him… Maybe he dislikes her know, but as it was for this kiss, he must have liked her before. Well, shouldn't I be fine with that? But maybe he's just making all this "I hate Iris" stuff up because he really thinks I love her and doesn't want to be in my way? Oh Zero, why don't you just tell me what's up with you? You're so weird in your actions sometimes!
"X! Hey X, are you listening??"
"Ahhh, yeah, sure! Just continue…"
"Ah okay, well, as I was saying, that one day, I just asked him politely if he thought the color of my hat matches my eyes, he just was like 'who cares, nobody's looking in your eyes anyway'. Can you imagine that? Ha! Not quite the Mr. Romantic, don't you think X?"
I nod, but I'm already off in my world again. Just let her talk. And while she does, I don't know where we're even going. But hey, why do I do this? I shake my head.
"What's the matter X?"
"Sorry Iris, I gotta go…See ya!"
I'm running away, leaving Iris behind. I just can't stand her anymore now, not today. I need to think about what I've heard.
Let's analyze the gathered facts from today. First of all, they kissed. Great… and second, Iris is annoying like HELL! I can imagine very well how Zero felt. But I still don't get why he dated her again and again if he dislikes her so much as he's saying. That wouldn't fit to the kissing fact as well. So I'm pretty sure my conclusion about him really liking her is right, but he only wants me to be happy and makes it look like he hates her so I don't feel bad for dating Iris… I mean, even if she's annoying and he acts rude… he always acts rude, that's just like him, and when you love someone you kindly ignore the weaknesses of the other one. Jeez I'm just so good at making such conclusions. Wonder if it's right. But hey, all facts combined this is the most likely to be true.
The other possibility would be, he REALLY hates her and always did and thinks I'm in love with Iris and he wants me to be happy. But then it wouldn't have been for the kiss. Damn this kiss, it's giving me a hard time to think about it!! Isn't there a third possibility? That he likes me actually? I guess there might, but it's a chance around 0,046 or something… there are too many facts against that. He would NEVER arrange a date with Iris for me if he was in love with me right? Because IF he was he would have realized already days ago that I love him, there were so many hints! He would just have to take one, but he didn't. So if he got it, he ignored me because he doesn't feel this way, and if he didn't get it, he can't feel anything for me anyway because he would have realized then. Right?
Oh my god, if anybody could hear me think! They'd put me into a nuthouse right away! But well, can't I start to get over it right now? Now that I can be pretty sure Zero's not feeling for me this way? Jeez, I'm afraid I still need to hear it from him. Damnit. This'll take forever!
I finally reach HQ. And sure enough, the first person I'm running into, is Zero.
"OUTCH!"
"Are you planning to make a record out of it?" Zero smiles.
"Out of what?!"
"Out of running into me all the time! By the way, did you get that drivers licence thing a thought?"
"Oh just stop it Zero, will ya? My day was bad enough."
"Oh really??" he looks like he's setting free balloons any second now, throwing a party. I look at him like he's lost his marbles.
"What's with this happy look?"
He seems to realize that this behaviour is out of place and quickly changes his expression to very concerned.
"Oh, sorry, just… ehm.. a joke! Yeah, a joke I heard today and can't stop thinking about it! Haha!! Ehm.. cough well, how was your date with Iris? Not too good the way you look I assume?"
Is it just me or does he surpress another grin? Must have been a really good joke. He's gotta tell me some day.
"No, not at all if you wanna know… She's hell annoying!! I don't have the slightest clue how you could stand all the dates with her! You're way more impatient than I am!"
"See? Told ya I don't like her and now you know why…"
Hm? So maybe it is the second possibility I had in mind, that he really dislikes her… he sounded pretty serious. Well, but still, the goddamn kiss!! ARG!! Brain damage!!
"Sorry Zero, I think I better go to bed… I don't feel like… well.. anything now.. Just want to sleep and get my mind off things…"
"What things?"
"Since when are you so curious?"
"Oh, never mind… I'll escort you if you don't mind. You.. ehm… might fall asleep before you get there, so your bodyguard better be there right?"
He smiles again. He really seems happy about something.
"Hey, tell me the joke!"
"What?"
"That joke! Must have been a real good one, you're still smiling! I wanna smile too!"
"Ehm…"
I look at him like a little boy, pouting.
"C'mon! No fair keeping it for yourself!"
"How could I resist you. You look soooo cute when you're pouting like that! Sure, I'll tell you!"
I stop. Did he say resist? And cute?
"You think I'm cute?"
Hey I'm not blushing!! I'm progressing! But funny enough, Zero does. I NEVER saw him blush before!
"Well, ah, you know what I mean right? Hehe, so about that joke, it was "At night it's colder than outside" HAHA isn't that great??"
"…"
He sweatdrops. This must be the worst joke I ever heard…
"Zero?"
"Yes…?"
"That wasn't a bit funny."
"Maybe that's the funny thing about it?"
We both look a bit lost now. After a minute or so, we burst out in laughter. I haven't laughed so hard in such a long time! It feels good! And Zero's sharing this moment with me…
We reach my room.
"Well, good night then, Zero. Thanks for escorting me. I think everything's alright now."
"Yeah sure." He smiles, but then the smile fades and is replaced by a concerned look.
"X… I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings earlier when smiling like an idiot while you seemed pretty upset from your date… I didn't mean to. Really."
I'm astonished. Why does he care so much for that? I already forgot. After all, I wasn't upset because of the date…
"It's okay Zero. I don't blame you for anything. Well, maybe only-" I cut myself of. No, I can't tellhim I'm a bit angry that he told Iris I'd like to date her and don't dare to ask and stuff and making her think I like her. He did this just for me, thinking he's doing me a favor. If I tell him this now, he might be down thinking he did the wrong thing. Well okay I already said she's annoying… But well, I don't want him to be down. He seems so happy just now… Plus, we just got back to our old relationship. I don't wanna lose this again.
"Only what? Tell me!"
"No, it's okay, it's nothing!"
"It's not! You wanted to say something! It's important for me to know! How can I promise to get better if you don't tell me what I did wrong?"
"Really Zero, it's okay. Trust me!" I give him the warmest smile I have. That seems to soothe him.
"Alright then, I won't bother you by asking any more. Have a good sleep, X."
"You too! Night!"
I enter my room and don't take another look at Zero. Although I felt amazingly great when he returned my smile I just gave him, I can't help but feel that my heart is torn apart somehow. For I will never get to hold him or being held by him like I wish it could be…