Chapter 2: Flying Nuns
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"Hey Ob, what does 'soak' mean?" Jack (Ripper) asked as they lost the big crowd of raging Newsies when they began to dance and sing a song about selling papers.
"Dunno. But that guy you gave the birdie to was kinda hot." Ob smirked devilishly.
"Nah," Jack (Ripper) grinned even wider, "I'll go for the cowboy." she made a box using both her thumbs and pointer fingers and said, "So hot. Want to touch the hiney. AROO!" Ob joined in the 'aroo' and they riffed their imaginaruy guitars.
"The cowboy looks plastic. His face is shiny." Ob crinkled her nose and snorted as the cowboy tripped over his own feet and fell down.
"No. SPOT IS PLASTIC!! DOWN THERE!" Jack (Ripper) raged, biting Ob's arm.
Instead of freaking out, demanding a tetanus shot from the bite, Ob said "Who's Spot?"
"We'll see him and his plastic faced drug-lord self later. Let's go piss off some crutons!"
"Newsies?" Ob supplied, raising her eyebrows.
".....yes."
"Shall we go in stalk mode?" Ob inquired, wringing her hands eagerly.
"Let's go!" Jack agreed immediatly.
"Atoms away!" Ob and Jack ran off side by side in the opposite direction they were running the first time, their suspenders and trenchcoats flailing behind them in sheer terror.
~
"What's going on now?" Ob returned beside her accomplice, chocolate smeared over her face, which a half-finished ice cream in one hand and a piece of bread in the other.
"They finished singing and the cowboy just tipped this fag dudes hot over and now - hey. Where'd you get the bread?" Jack (Ripper) asked enviously.
"Those nuns you torched threw it at me." Ob said sadly. "Oh! The cowboys talking to someone." she pointed.
"His name is Jack. Can you believe it? It's like it was meant to be! Jack and Jack! APPLES!" Jack hopped around to point out that she was indeed, scary.
"That David dude has a huge neck!" Ob said aloud, ignoring the fact that she didn't know how she knew the dudes name was David. She saw the cowboy Jack run again, and asked, "Why did he run off in the first place again?"
"He tipped over some guys hat." Jack (Ripper) replied.
"OOOOOOO!!" Ob shouted dramatically, getting a lot of stares from a couple of little Newsies. "That's one huge ass insult right there. Whoo doggie."
"Yer tellin' me!" Jack bit Ob again, who just shrugged her off.
"Oh! Oh! A little fight! Take out the grenades!" Ob ordered.
Jack (Ripper) looked scared. "Erm...grenades?"
"Yeah! Quick! Hurry!"
"They're gone."
"What?!"
"They're gone."
"I heard you!"
"Then why did you say - "
"Why are they gone?!"
"I stuck 'em on the nuns. There should be extra crispy nun pieces flying over our heads in three seconds."
"How many?" Ob is very deaf.
"THREE!" Jack (Ripper) shouted.
"I think it's been more than three seconds already, sheriff." Ob pointed out.
"No it hasn't."
"Now it DEFINITLY has been more. Are you sure they weren't duds?"
"JUST BE PATIENT!" Jack scolded after she punched Ob's shoulder.
"Yer mom!" Ob folded her arms across her chest and waitied for the explosion that didn't come.
~
"I don't want your papers!" David handed back the bunch of papers to cowboy Jack, who didn't take them.
"Newsies always want more papes." he smiled.
"Well, I don't." David said, acting all preppy.
"Yer goin' ta need 'em whens we'se become business partners." cowboy Jack said as though the matter had already been decided.
"A ha!" David exhaled a laugh of disbelief.
"A ha!" Jack mocked him.
"A HA!" a laugh echoed off the walls from behind Racetrack.
"A HA!" another laugh erupted from behind Mush.
Jack was trying hard not to grope Mush as she stood behind him but she only decided to pinch his ass. She had stolen cowboy Jack's hat and was wearing it in a proud manner.
Ob was behind Racetrack, knees bent in an attempt to hide her 5'6 body behind Race's 5'2 build. She wasn't that sucessful.
"It's dose goils again!" Racetrack drawled, his accent swooning Jack (Ripper) and Ob all the way to Turkey.
Mm. Turkey.
"I'se taught we'se chased 'em away!" cowboy Jack grabbed his hat back from Jack (Ripper)
"I'm the King of New York!" Ob stated in a matter-of-fact way.
"What?!" Racetrack and Bumlets and Specs and Skittery and Snipeshooter said in unison.
"You'll understand later." Ob explained.
"Let's soak 'em for Crutchy!" cowboy Jack declared, although Crutchy wasn't in the refuge yet. The rest of the Newsies began to cheer and shout as cowboy Jack and Mush hoisted Jack (Ripper) above their shoulders and carried her alongside Ob, who was being carried by Racetrack and Specs.
From the magic of fakeness, there just happened to be a running hose no more than two feet from where everyone was so thats where cowboy Jack ordered everyone to go. The four guys carrying the two scary ladies dropped them against a wall and cowboy Jack picked up the hose.
"What does soak mean?" Jack (Ripper) asked cowboy Jack.
Cowboy Jack aimed the hose right at Ob and Jack (Ripper). He "soaked" Ob and Jack (Ripper) until their trenchcoats weighed them down from all of the water weight. They all cheered and high fived each other and smacked each other and then went off to sell papers.
"Let's follow them!" Jack (Ripper) got to her feet excitedly.
"Ooh, Racetrack," Ob got to her feet also. "He will be mine. Oh yes. He will be mine."
"I want Racetrack!"
"You have Jack!" Ob told her.
"But I want Racetrack!"
"Take Jack full time and I'll take Race full time. You can have the cowboy ALL you want!"
"You get Spot full time! Give ME Racetrack!"
"Who's Spot?!"
"You'll know later!"
"Fine!"
"Fine! But I still want Racetrack." Jack (Ripper) crossed her arms.
"He's MINE dammit! I get him and . . that guy . . . Spat."
"It's SPOT!"
"YOUR MOM!"
"How about we time-share Racetrack?"
"...."
"...."
"...."
"EXCELLENT!" They both spit shook hands and continued after the Newsies who left to sell papers.
Just then, a roaring blast rang through the Manhattan roads and buildings and a couple of nuns soared through the air.
"Whoa. Flying nun." Ob said in awe.
"Good one!" Ob and Jack (Ripper) guitar riffed and hopped, skipped and jumped after the Manhattan Newsies.
------------------
--------------
"Hey Ob, what does 'soak' mean?" Jack (Ripper) asked as they lost the big crowd of raging Newsies when they began to dance and sing a song about selling papers.
"Dunno. But that guy you gave the birdie to was kinda hot." Ob smirked devilishly.
"Nah," Jack (Ripper) grinned even wider, "I'll go for the cowboy." she made a box using both her thumbs and pointer fingers and said, "So hot. Want to touch the hiney. AROO!" Ob joined in the 'aroo' and they riffed their imaginaruy guitars.
"The cowboy looks plastic. His face is shiny." Ob crinkled her nose and snorted as the cowboy tripped over his own feet and fell down.
"No. SPOT IS PLASTIC!! DOWN THERE!" Jack (Ripper) raged, biting Ob's arm.
Instead of freaking out, demanding a tetanus shot from the bite, Ob said "Who's Spot?"
"We'll see him and his plastic faced drug-lord self later. Let's go piss off some crutons!"
"Newsies?" Ob supplied, raising her eyebrows.
".....yes."
"Shall we go in stalk mode?" Ob inquired, wringing her hands eagerly.
"Let's go!" Jack agreed immediatly.
"Atoms away!" Ob and Jack ran off side by side in the opposite direction they were running the first time, their suspenders and trenchcoats flailing behind them in sheer terror.
~
"What's going on now?" Ob returned beside her accomplice, chocolate smeared over her face, which a half-finished ice cream in one hand and a piece of bread in the other.
"They finished singing and the cowboy just tipped this fag dudes hot over and now - hey. Where'd you get the bread?" Jack (Ripper) asked enviously.
"Those nuns you torched threw it at me." Ob said sadly. "Oh! The cowboys talking to someone." she pointed.
"His name is Jack. Can you believe it? It's like it was meant to be! Jack and Jack! APPLES!" Jack hopped around to point out that she was indeed, scary.
"That David dude has a huge neck!" Ob said aloud, ignoring the fact that she didn't know how she knew the dudes name was David. She saw the cowboy Jack run again, and asked, "Why did he run off in the first place again?"
"He tipped over some guys hat." Jack (Ripper) replied.
"OOOOOOO!!" Ob shouted dramatically, getting a lot of stares from a couple of little Newsies. "That's one huge ass insult right there. Whoo doggie."
"Yer tellin' me!" Jack bit Ob again, who just shrugged her off.
"Oh! Oh! A little fight! Take out the grenades!" Ob ordered.
Jack (Ripper) looked scared. "Erm...grenades?"
"Yeah! Quick! Hurry!"
"They're gone."
"What?!"
"They're gone."
"I heard you!"
"Then why did you say - "
"Why are they gone?!"
"I stuck 'em on the nuns. There should be extra crispy nun pieces flying over our heads in three seconds."
"How many?" Ob is very deaf.
"THREE!" Jack (Ripper) shouted.
"I think it's been more than three seconds already, sheriff." Ob pointed out.
"No it hasn't."
"Now it DEFINITLY has been more. Are you sure they weren't duds?"
"JUST BE PATIENT!" Jack scolded after she punched Ob's shoulder.
"Yer mom!" Ob folded her arms across her chest and waitied for the explosion that didn't come.
~
"I don't want your papers!" David handed back the bunch of papers to cowboy Jack, who didn't take them.
"Newsies always want more papes." he smiled.
"Well, I don't." David said, acting all preppy.
"Yer goin' ta need 'em whens we'se become business partners." cowboy Jack said as though the matter had already been decided.
"A ha!" David exhaled a laugh of disbelief.
"A ha!" Jack mocked him.
"A HA!" a laugh echoed off the walls from behind Racetrack.
"A HA!" another laugh erupted from behind Mush.
Jack was trying hard not to grope Mush as she stood behind him but she only decided to pinch his ass. She had stolen cowboy Jack's hat and was wearing it in a proud manner.
Ob was behind Racetrack, knees bent in an attempt to hide her 5'6 body behind Race's 5'2 build. She wasn't that sucessful.
"It's dose goils again!" Racetrack drawled, his accent swooning Jack (Ripper) and Ob all the way to Turkey.
Mm. Turkey.
"I'se taught we'se chased 'em away!" cowboy Jack grabbed his hat back from Jack (Ripper)
"I'm the King of New York!" Ob stated in a matter-of-fact way.
"What?!" Racetrack and Bumlets and Specs and Skittery and Snipeshooter said in unison.
"You'll understand later." Ob explained.
"Let's soak 'em for Crutchy!" cowboy Jack declared, although Crutchy wasn't in the refuge yet. The rest of the Newsies began to cheer and shout as cowboy Jack and Mush hoisted Jack (Ripper) above their shoulders and carried her alongside Ob, who was being carried by Racetrack and Specs.
From the magic of fakeness, there just happened to be a running hose no more than two feet from where everyone was so thats where cowboy Jack ordered everyone to go. The four guys carrying the two scary ladies dropped them against a wall and cowboy Jack picked up the hose.
"What does soak mean?" Jack (Ripper) asked cowboy Jack.
Cowboy Jack aimed the hose right at Ob and Jack (Ripper). He "soaked" Ob and Jack (Ripper) until their trenchcoats weighed them down from all of the water weight. They all cheered and high fived each other and smacked each other and then went off to sell papers.
"Let's follow them!" Jack (Ripper) got to her feet excitedly.
"Ooh, Racetrack," Ob got to her feet also. "He will be mine. Oh yes. He will be mine."
"I want Racetrack!"
"You have Jack!" Ob told her.
"But I want Racetrack!"
"Take Jack full time and I'll take Race full time. You can have the cowboy ALL you want!"
"You get Spot full time! Give ME Racetrack!"
"Who's Spot?!"
"You'll know later!"
"Fine!"
"Fine! But I still want Racetrack." Jack (Ripper) crossed her arms.
"He's MINE dammit! I get him and . . that guy . . . Spat."
"It's SPOT!"
"YOUR MOM!"
"How about we time-share Racetrack?"
"...."
"...."
"...."
"EXCELLENT!" They both spit shook hands and continued after the Newsies who left to sell papers.
Just then, a roaring blast rang through the Manhattan roads and buildings and a couple of nuns soared through the air.
"Whoa. Flying nun." Ob said in awe.
"Good one!" Ob and Jack (Ripper) guitar riffed and hopped, skipped and jumped after the Manhattan Newsies.
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