After everyone finished square dancing with each other, cowboy Jack held up his hands and shouted, "Let's get back ta our papes, Newsies!" he turned to Jack (Ripper) and Ob, "Youse goils can wait for us at da lodging house when until we come back."
To break the awkward tension, Ob shouted, "Don't think about doing anything to us! I KNOW KARATE!" she did a few high yahs and punches to show that she meant business.
"Kar - a - tay?" cowboy Jack cocked an eyebrow.
Jack (Ripper) smacked Ob to get to shut up. She WANTED cowboy Jack to think evil thoughts!
"Kay. We'll see youse later!" cowboy Jack turned his back. (Hey! That rhymed!)
"I LOVE YOU JACK!!" Jack (Ripper) screamed at the top of her lungs. Cowboy Jack turned around to see Jack (Ripper) pointed at a very confused looking Ob. Jack (Ripper) said quickly. "I - I - It was Ob. S-She was talking to me!"
"I was not! I AIN'T NO LEZBO!"
"Lez - bow?" Mush was confused.
Cowboy Jack smirked and ran off, dozens of Newsies following.
"They run allot." Ob said aloud.
"Hey, look what I 'jacked'." Jack (Ripper) pulled out cowboy Jack cowboy hat from her pocket. It somehow managed to fit.
"Big deal!" Ob didn't look the least bit impressed. "Look what I 'obbed'." she whipped out Spot's slingshot. (RHYMAGE!)
"So? I snagged Race's hat!"
"So? I got Race's cigar! It still has his spit on it! NOW I CAN CLONE HIM!" Ob hopped around triumphantly.
"SO? I GOT JACKS BANDANA!!! AND IT'S SWEATY!"
"WELL I GOT SPOTS UNDERPANTS!" Ob yanked out a pair of red undies.
"...."
"YOU HEARD ME!"
"...."
"...."
"How?"
Ob shrugged.
"Let me see those." Jack (Ripper) took them away and screamed within seconds. A real bloodcurdling, hair-in-your-EARS-stand-up scream. "EW YOU TOOK DAVIDS UNDIES!!"
Ob barfed instantly, spitting on her hands to rid herself of any David germs that had made a home on them. Ob double checked the waistband of the undies (they were on the floor now that Jack (Ripper) threw them away from her) and sure enough, scrawled along the waistband was the name 'DAVIE'.
"EW! I'm contaminated!!" Ob shrieked, rubbing Spots sling shot germs on her hands.
"Uh, excuse me?" came a voice.
Jack (Ripper) and Ob turned their heads at the same time to where the voice came from. It came from a preppy looking brunette.
"What do YOU want?" Jack (Ripper) snarled, prepared to give her a wedgie.
"Hi. I'm Sarah Jacobs. David Jacobs sister." she explained, extending a hand to Ob, then to Jack (Ripper); neither of them shook it.
"You die now." Ob stated, hating David even more.
"No! Wait! I - I'm Jack's girlfriend!" she sputtered.
Ob laughed. "Show's how much YOU know, moron! JACKS A GIRL!" Ob yelled, thinking she was talking about Jack (Ripper). But she finally caught on and laughed sheepishly as Jack (Ripper) walked close to Sarah.
"You die NOW!" Jack (Ripper) took out her shotgun and fired at Sarah.
Sarah died.
And we were all very sad.
*snort*
~
"Jack, it's okay! Dere'll be odda goils!" Racetrack handed a very upset Jacky-boy a mug of Rootbeer.
"Why did she hafta die?" Jack whined, accepting the mug. He returned home from his papers to find out that Sarah had been missing, and found dead beside the Lodging House.
Spot slugged down the rest of his beer. "I'm hot," he stated.
Race rolled his eyes and David giggled like a little girl in agreement. He was surprisingly happy seeing as how his sister had just died. It was quite possible he was content with having Spot so close to him.
After a few more minutes of Spot stating that he was gorgeous, Ob and Jack (Ripper) bounced inside the Lodging house, mysteriously covered in blood and holding David's red undies with two sticks.
"That's where those went!" David sighed, relieved that his undies were returned to him.
Spot got to his feet and took off his hat. "I'm hot."
"I know." Ob said dreamily.
"David's a girl!" Jack (Ripper) exclaimed randomly.
"Spot's hot!" David grinned
"Ob's got my sling shot!" Spot whined.
"Cowboy Jack is made of plastic!" Ob yelled, pointing frantically.
"Hey! Screw off goil! I ain't made of plastic!" cowboy Jack roared.
"Plastic!"
"GOIL!"
"DON'T CALL ME A GOIL!"
"GOIL!"
"PLASTIC!"
"Jack is a DAVID!" Jack (Ripper) screamed after she made out with Racetrack for two seconds.
Ob gasped. Gasped so loud and so long that she choked on her own spit. "BURRRNN!!" she laughed forever.
Spot looked to Race.
Race looked to Mush.
Mush looked to Snipe shooter.
Snipe shooter looked to Crutchy.
Crutchy looked to Boots.
Boots looked to Les.
Les looked to David.
David swooned at cowboy Jack.
Jack stared at Jack (Ripper).
Jack (Ripper) stared at her imaginary friend, Freddy.
Freddy gawked at Ob.
Ob picked her nose.
"Is this chapter over yet?" Ob sighed, flicking her booger at David's turned butt crack.
"I guess." Jack (Ripper) shrugged, grabbing Racetrack for another make-out session.
----------------
To break the awkward tension, Ob shouted, "Don't think about doing anything to us! I KNOW KARATE!" she did a few high yahs and punches to show that she meant business.
"Kar - a - tay?" cowboy Jack cocked an eyebrow.
Jack (Ripper) smacked Ob to get to shut up. She WANTED cowboy Jack to think evil thoughts!
"Kay. We'll see youse later!" cowboy Jack turned his back. (Hey! That rhymed!)
"I LOVE YOU JACK!!" Jack (Ripper) screamed at the top of her lungs. Cowboy Jack turned around to see Jack (Ripper) pointed at a very confused looking Ob. Jack (Ripper) said quickly. "I - I - It was Ob. S-She was talking to me!"
"I was not! I AIN'T NO LEZBO!"
"Lez - bow?" Mush was confused.
Cowboy Jack smirked and ran off, dozens of Newsies following.
"They run allot." Ob said aloud.
"Hey, look what I 'jacked'." Jack (Ripper) pulled out cowboy Jack cowboy hat from her pocket. It somehow managed to fit.
"Big deal!" Ob didn't look the least bit impressed. "Look what I 'obbed'." she whipped out Spot's slingshot. (RHYMAGE!)
"So? I snagged Race's hat!"
"So? I got Race's cigar! It still has his spit on it! NOW I CAN CLONE HIM!" Ob hopped around triumphantly.
"SO? I GOT JACKS BANDANA!!! AND IT'S SWEATY!"
"WELL I GOT SPOTS UNDERPANTS!" Ob yanked out a pair of red undies.
"...."
"YOU HEARD ME!"
"...."
"...."
"How?"
Ob shrugged.
"Let me see those." Jack (Ripper) took them away and screamed within seconds. A real bloodcurdling, hair-in-your-EARS-stand-up scream. "EW YOU TOOK DAVIDS UNDIES!!"
Ob barfed instantly, spitting on her hands to rid herself of any David germs that had made a home on them. Ob double checked the waistband of the undies (they were on the floor now that Jack (Ripper) threw them away from her) and sure enough, scrawled along the waistband was the name 'DAVIE'.
"EW! I'm contaminated!!" Ob shrieked, rubbing Spots sling shot germs on her hands.
"Uh, excuse me?" came a voice.
Jack (Ripper) and Ob turned their heads at the same time to where the voice came from. It came from a preppy looking brunette.
"What do YOU want?" Jack (Ripper) snarled, prepared to give her a wedgie.
"Hi. I'm Sarah Jacobs. David Jacobs sister." she explained, extending a hand to Ob, then to Jack (Ripper); neither of them shook it.
"You die now." Ob stated, hating David even more.
"No! Wait! I - I'm Jack's girlfriend!" she sputtered.
Ob laughed. "Show's how much YOU know, moron! JACKS A GIRL!" Ob yelled, thinking she was talking about Jack (Ripper). But she finally caught on and laughed sheepishly as Jack (Ripper) walked close to Sarah.
"You die NOW!" Jack (Ripper) took out her shotgun and fired at Sarah.
Sarah died.
And we were all very sad.
*snort*
~
"Jack, it's okay! Dere'll be odda goils!" Racetrack handed a very upset Jacky-boy a mug of Rootbeer.
"Why did she hafta die?" Jack whined, accepting the mug. He returned home from his papers to find out that Sarah had been missing, and found dead beside the Lodging House.
Spot slugged down the rest of his beer. "I'm hot," he stated.
Race rolled his eyes and David giggled like a little girl in agreement. He was surprisingly happy seeing as how his sister had just died. It was quite possible he was content with having Spot so close to him.
After a few more minutes of Spot stating that he was gorgeous, Ob and Jack (Ripper) bounced inside the Lodging house, mysteriously covered in blood and holding David's red undies with two sticks.
"That's where those went!" David sighed, relieved that his undies were returned to him.
Spot got to his feet and took off his hat. "I'm hot."
"I know." Ob said dreamily.
"David's a girl!" Jack (Ripper) exclaimed randomly.
"Spot's hot!" David grinned
"Ob's got my sling shot!" Spot whined.
"Cowboy Jack is made of plastic!" Ob yelled, pointing frantically.
"Hey! Screw off goil! I ain't made of plastic!" cowboy Jack roared.
"Plastic!"
"GOIL!"
"DON'T CALL ME A GOIL!"
"GOIL!"
"PLASTIC!"
"Jack is a DAVID!" Jack (Ripper) screamed after she made out with Racetrack for two seconds.
Ob gasped. Gasped so loud and so long that she choked on her own spit. "BURRRNN!!" she laughed forever.
Spot looked to Race.
Race looked to Mush.
Mush looked to Snipe shooter.
Snipe shooter looked to Crutchy.
Crutchy looked to Boots.
Boots looked to Les.
Les looked to David.
David swooned at cowboy Jack.
Jack stared at Jack (Ripper).
Jack (Ripper) stared at her imaginary friend, Freddy.
Freddy gawked at Ob.
Ob picked her nose.
"Is this chapter over yet?" Ob sighed, flicking her booger at David's turned butt crack.
"I guess." Jack (Ripper) shrugged, grabbing Racetrack for another make-out session.
----------------