Don't Be Afraid To Try Again

"Danny, we need you at the crime scene. Where are you?" Mac's voice echoed on the other end of Danny's cell phone.
"Umm, well I'll be there in a few." Danny thought of an excuse.

"Okay?" Mac was not sure what to say to Danny's uneasiness.

"Did you get a hold of Danny?" Stella yelled from across the park.

"Yes…He'll be here in a few." Mac was still looking down at his phone thinking, 'should I be worried about the way that Danny was acting or leave in, and risk it getting worse.'

-

"Danny, good you're here…We have a double homicide, we got the call from a neighbor about two hours ago because there was a foul smell traveling in to their apartment when we opened the door we found them here. Multiple stab wounds to the chest and abdomen was the cause of death in both cases," Mac briefed as he guided Danny to the bodies.

"Thanks Mac" Danny started processing the crime scene, but soon Danny stopped and walked up to Mac and gently tapped him on the shoulder.

"Mac, I need to talk to you after shift…please." There was a sense of desperation in Danny's voice, something that Mac had never heard in Danny's voice before.

"Yes…of course, come to my office. We'll talk." Mac put his hand on Danny's shoulder and then walked away.

"Danny can you come see this?" Aiden's voice was heard from across the small room.

"Yeah sure" Danny walked over wiping his eyes on the way, "yes, what do you have?"

"I think I've found the murder weapon, it was under the couch." Aiden said holding up a knife that looked as if it had been whipped clean

"Okay well bag it and tag it." Danny said getting to his feet and walking away to process more of the crime scene.

-

After shift (which felt like a really long) Danny was bracing him self to tell Mac what was bothering him.

As Danny entered the office he shut the door behind him, Mac put away the folder sensing it was something important and felt he needed to give Danny all of his attention.

"Hey Danny, so what's up?" Mac was trying to sound as casual as he could.

"Well, I think I'm going to need some time off…" Danny just put it like that so possibly he didn't have to explain why.

"Okay I can do that, why do you need the time off though? I'll have to include that in the report." Mac raised an eyebrow at Danny

"Well, a friend of mine died over the weekend and I think I need sometime to just relax and calm down." Danny said plainly

"I'm sorry to hear that, how much time do you think your going to need off?" Mac moved over to Danny, there was another chair set up on the other side of his desk.

"Um, I was thinking about a month." This was where Danny knew he was going to get the questions that were personal.

"A month, Danny? What was your relationship with your friend?" Mac was trying to still sound sensitive but that was hard for him seeing that he was asking for a whole month off.

"He was, okay… Mac this is kind of hard for me to say, He was my boyfriend." Danny took off his glasses and wiped his eyes. "No one knows about me, so do you think this could stay between us?" Danny put his glasses back on and looked in to Mac's face.

"Yes, definitely, is there anything that I can do?" Mac put his hand on Danny's knee and looked in to his pain filled eyes.

"No, I think I'll be fine after a while…I just need time, and this month leave is just an estimate, a high estimate, so I may err…or probably will be back sooner."

-

As Danny walked in to his apartment and threw down his bag and jacket. He didn't know what to do so he fell asleep on top of the covers and didn't care he was in his clothes.

Danny was awoken by a loud and powerful knock at his door. He slowly got up from his nap and walked to his apartment door.

"Danny, I just came over to see how you were." Mac was standing there with all of his work stuff still in his hand so he couldn't have gone home.

"Come in." Danny closed the door behind him and took Mac's Stuff

They walked over to Danny's couch and the both sat down simultaneously. "So how have you been?" Mac started

"Umm, I'm not sure right now." Danny put his hands to his face

"It's okay." At that moment Danny had never felt closer to Mac, he found comfort in his arms, right they're on Danny's small couch.

As Danny cried Mac just sat there and held him, Mac new this was one of the things that Danny needed most; comfort. Later that night Danny fell asleep on the couch and Mac quietly walked out the door with a simple note left on the counter top…

-

Danny got up later that day at 1200PM. He was thinking in his head 'all I need right now is coffee' He walked in to the kitchen and saw the note that Mac had left.

Danny,

Things will get easier.

Love, Mac

Danny thought about this note and what he really ment…'Love? He could have easily written from, or even sincerely, but love?' Danny didn't want to think of this any harder he was already confused enough.

-

Later that day at work Mac was sitting at his desk finishing up some paper work from all of yesterday's cases, and then Aiden walked in a huff.

"Mac? Where is Danny? Were swamped with cases!" Aiden was standing at the door when Mac signaled her over to his desk.

"I let him have a month off." Mac was looking down at his papers. But he knew that Aiden was pissed off at all the time of he had given to Danny.

"What? A month? What happened, is there a good reason for this?" Aiden was not in a mood clearly

"Umm…a close friend died." Mac looked up at Aiden who obviously didn't understand how close this friend was.

"A friend... and got a month? One of my friends died and you have me one day, a fucking day Mac, we have so much work its crazy, its that time of the year, ya know?"

Aiden was on the verge of yelling loudly.

"His partner or significant other died." Mac immediately regretted this decision to tell the truth

"Oh…Um, I'm sorry." Aiden put her head down he regretted yelling about it. She continued try to make this fit, "So…Danny's…" Mac cut in, "not going to be back for a while."

"Oh. Okay, well if you talk to him, tell him I said sorry." Aiden started to get up but was stopped by the tug of Mac's arm.

"No one knows about him, this pretty top secret okay, keep it on the down low, and if at all possible just don't tell anyone." Mac was clearly not impressed this his decision to tell Aid, but had to deal with it now he thought 'thank god I didn't say straight up that he was gay'.

-

After the shift Danny called Mac, just to talk. Danny knew that he could now count on Mac for comfort in his life; he had never seen this side of Mac before but whatever it was…he liked it.

-

"Mac?" Danny's calm New York accent was heard across the phone line

"Yes? Hey, Dan it's me, what's up?" Mac was tired from the long day of work but was comforted at the fact that Danny had called him for a friend to talk to…or possibly more?

"How was work? Was Stella there?"

"Yes, She sends her condolences, she's worried about you, you know? You should call her later." Mac said

"Yes, I will for sure. Um, I think I'm going to go back to work next week, for some reason the healing process has gone very quick, im not sure why." Danny actually had life in his voice and Mac knew that Danny wasn't faking this feeling.

"Oh, That's great Danny, we do really miss you here. I really miss you." Mac wasn't sure how that slipped out.

"Uh, I really miss you to Mac, I think we should have some dinner together, you know…discuss work and …" Danny was cut off by Mac's voice on the other end of the telephone line, "Dinner is great, Well talk later tonight or tomorrow about this. I have to make a call to the DA's office, I'm really sorry to cut this conversation short. "

"No problem at all Mac, talk to you later. Bye" As Danny hung up the phone he was filled with different emotions; none could really be described in works except…wow.

-

At dinner later that week, Danny made the reservations at a nice restaurant; you could dress up or not. Danny picked up Mac at 7 pm sharp. He enjoyed being on time.

Danny approached the door uneasy all that crossed his mind is, 'this isn't a date, and just a casual work related dinner right?' He reached for the doorbell and slowly rang it.

"Danny, come on in!" Mac was wearing a very stylish blue shirt with some form of embroidery on the chest, Danny was thinking in his head, "this is so unlike Mac, where are the white shirts and ties? Not like I'm complaining…"

"Hey Mac, so are you ready?" Danny asked

"Yes, I just have to get my wallet." Mac walked towards his room and quickly exited

"Lets go!" Mac smiled.

-

As Danny and Mac chatted it up in the classy restaurant they had no serious conversations until the night came to an end.

"So here we are… do you want to come up for some coffee."? Mac offered.

"Umm…I'm not sure if that's the best idea, but thanks for a wonderful night," Mac slowly got out of the car and shut the door.

When Mac got up to his apartment he lay down on his bed to collect his feelings. It seemed like the second he started to doze off there was a knock at his door. Mac didn't know what to think or do; no one ever comes to his door. 'It couldn't be Danny could it? The night had just ended…'

"Hello, Who is it? Mac was looking through his peep whole but didn't see anything

"Mac, Its me; Danny. Please open up." There was a sense of urgency in his voice and Mac decided not to ask any more questions.

"Danny what is it?" Mac put his hand on the small of Danny's back and led him to the couch

"Its you Mac, I have a lot of things to confess…these are all going to be really hard for me to say. And please don't judge me," Danny edged close to Mac.

"Danny I don't like how this sounds." Mac was still listening though

"Umm, well my boyfriend never died. I just left him, you have no clue on how sorry I am that I lied to you!" Danny started feeling his emotions getting to him.

"Danny, you didn't have to lie." Mac whispered

"Yes! Yes, I did. You wouldn't have given me the time off, or the time away from you!" Danny looked away from Mac because he didn't want to see his face

"Away from me? Danny what's that all about?" Mac was terribly confused and hurt.

"Yes, Danny…I'm in love with you. I know you don't go that way, or at least I don't think so." Danny backed away from Mac because he didn't want to know his reaction.

"Danny…uh, I don't know what to do about this… but I just have to say, I love you to, I know that this is highly unprofessional but you just have to let go sometimes." Mac finished finally letting out his feeling that haunted him for the longest time.

"Mac, I cant believe this, where do we go from here?" Danny was now as close as he could be to Mac

"Um, well lets keep it quite. Of course not to offend you." Mac leaned forward and hugged Danny, he was comfortable doing this to another guy…he wasn't sure if he would be, but it felt right to hug Danny.

"Okay, well I have to get going, I guess I will see you at work tomorrow. I certainly can't take the time off now" Danny chuckled and closed the door behind him.

-

While Danny was at home the only think that he could think about was Mac, 'What are the odds that I find a gay friend working with me that also likes me?'

Danny was getting ready for bed and he didn't think that he would have any trouble trying to go to sleep, 'for the first time in my life everything was falling in to place…slowly mind your but falling.'

-

Mac was tossing a turning wondering, 'how will his harm my relationship with the others? How quick will they find out they are CSI's'

-

Early that morning at work Stella came up to Mac and started firing the questions,
"Mac, why didn't you have your cell phone on last night? I tried to call you for a second opinion on a case and you weren't there, and I don't know if you have a home phone." Stella was clearly not that upset but was just making a deal out of nothing.

"I didn't feel like doing any. Isn't that simple enough?" Mac was walking and talking to his office now, thinking, 'hopefully me walking will cut the conversation short.'

"I'm sorry what did you just say? 'I didn't feel like doing any work?' Mac that's not you, what's up?" Stella stopped walking realizing what Mac was doing.

"Nothing's up? Why do you think that, just because I didn't feel like working while I wasn't at work? I just needed one night off, isn't that possible?" Mac walked in to his office and closed the door and thought, 'fuck the open door policy.'

"Mac we have a case at a bakery on 5th Street." Danny popped his head in the door way

All that Mac could see was what he was wearing it was, his sexy glasses and his shirt wasn't quite buttoned up all the way.

"Okay be right there Danny," Mac packed up his brief case and looked around to see if anything else should be put in

-

At the scene Danny was the only one there all the other CSI's had cases of their own to deal with at the time, and its just a coincidence that Danny and Mac were paired together on this one.

"We have a male approximately 24 years old, found with one gun shot wound to the head and he's not wearing any clothes, I still haven't figured that one out." Danny briefed.

"Thanks Danny, have you lifted anything off the body yet?" Mac looked at Danny in a different way now.

"Uh…Umm…no not yet." Danny could only act so professional in front of this man.

"Okay thanks." Mac started working on collecting evidence while Danny went out side and started asking people about this crime.

-

Meanwhile on 52nd Street Stella and Aiden were working on a break and enter, far less interesting

"So Stella, how did that date go with that guy where did he work…Denny's?" Aiden started to laugh a little

"For you information it was TGI Fridays and it didn't go well, he took me to TGI Fridays…so he could get dinner for free." Stella thought it was funny now.

"Aw, sex-eh." Aiden laughed and walked to another side of the room.

Stella knew that Aiden liked Danny so seeing as she brought up the shitty date that she had she was going to bring up the date that she didn't have.

"So, ask Danny yet?" Stella whispered

"No, of course not, I didn't know that he was dating someone else, so I'm going to back off for a while; and between just between you and me, I think that Tanglewood boy thing is quite sexy…I know that nothing has been said about it but just the thought of Danny being in a gang. Hopefully not killing people. Is very sexy." Aiden smiled and Stella did also

"He has been asking very odd lately though, and so has Mac…I'm not sure about it kind of, but I do still like him for sure. Like when I was talking to Mac he said significant other or something like that, like why didn't he just say girlfriend or something, like is he gay?" Aiden laughed.

Stella cut in because she was equally confused, "you know how Mac is 'always use the politically correct term' so I'm sure it was a girlfriend, can you image a guy…" Stella and Aiden started to laugh in unison.

They both got up and started walking out of the house to question anyone, someone.

-