New fic here, hope it will be from your liking. I took long time into this, so please take the time to read it properly.
I don't own any of the Sonic Team characters and all the disclaimer matters.
IMPORTANT NOTE: The narrator is Shadow the Hedgehog.
TWIN FEATHERS
Chapter 1: Obscure solitude.
Fearful night in which womb I reside. Covered by its gentle darkness I bid my last breath of will. Engulfed not into a tragedy, but in something I chose to become. I chose… yes, that's something you taught me. Many call this "harsh full life", I only call it "existence"; roaming between thought and feeling; hate and intelligence; mind and soul. Now my night is laid to sleep, but your day is still to continue. Live for me, as I am dying for you. Do not misunderstand me, this is not my dying wish, nor a curse to vengefully haunt you over the dark; these words are merely the emissaries of my soul; which, I expect, will remain by your side not as a spectre, but as a companion to your heart.
For those who wonder what my story is, it may take some time, for I myself am still dwelling in every singularity that have brought me here. Situations, facts and thoughts; one so distant from the other, even from themselves, yet they are directly intimate. When trying to endow one of them, the next arrives with an unavoidable mental strike that bewilders every fibre of personality left in your being; as each has its own will to be, stealing your own and transforming you into a slave of cause and consequence, and then of a vicious cycle.
Forgive my etherealness; the intention of this is to clear my soul, and not to drive yours into a darker pit. I should probably start speaking utilizing more structured ideas. The opportunity never presented itself for me to explain everything; since I met you. I am now here, with only the strength to leave these words behind me, as I drown into the abyss. If you give think into it, it is ironical, even I can die; after everything that has occurred, for it to do so again; and one thing I'm obligated to speak out of my mind: never in my life, if it is even possible to name it in that manner, had I thought possible for me to die with this emotion.
Do you remember how it happened in the first instance? I infer that as myself, you thought something of this ambit was not even to take into consideration at all. There was something unknown there. Majority often says that opposites attract each other. But we were not like that; the two of us were different, that is not discussable; but we were also the same. Born and lived different from everybody else; with a role to fulfil in this universe. Nevertheless, there still exists certain emptiness in these words, for this is something I recently found out; our similarity.
I constantly question myself about it. How was it possible that I hadn't notice before; especially when it is most common for me to pierce right through another soul with a simple stare? You're emerald glance held such clearness, I should had been able to observe it. Probably it was that never had I bothered to glance beyond your face, beyond your sapphire silhouette. How did I manage to avoid taking notice of that shine behind you; that beautiful flutter? Or was it that you were concealing it from me? No, that's not it. Nothing in your being would give room for such behaviour. Yet it mine there was plenty. I was so engraved in my own and futile existence that even considering the visible facts, I was able to contain myself from unrevealing what you securely were attempting to tell me.
Now that I will be gone from this world, another is to take my place; for it is one that has to be ever occupied. Will my replacement be efficient is a matter that does not really reach my concern. Though I do wonder, am I the only one who has gone through this trial? Trial... A trial it was not; there was no imposition involved. My own dullness and feelings incited it to happen; out of my bare desire. My soul was supposed to be banned from those feelings, yet you achieved for them to arise within me. Was it your intention or not I will not be able to acknowledge further on; but that is not relevant at all; the importance of it is, that in a understandable way to me, you did it.
To remember the scenes before that has become an uneasy task. All the images and voices are now vague and unimportant. Yet I remember them with recognizable detail, for my mind does not allow me to forget, to blind my memory, to release the pain. Finally I will be able to abandon my past, and leave everything behind. At this moment you're the only thought in me, and I want the end to be that way. Pardon me for we did not dispose of sufficient time, but in certain cases destiny has its determined ways, regardless of our actions or decisions.
As a last chance I'll take this, to discard all the scars from my previous life. To turn them into words and let them fly into oblivion if they are not to reach you. That will not be the case I presume, for my soul is impregnated in this message. Allow me then to unravel my mind with tranquillity; as time I've got much. The transition between life and death is very prolonged, or so they say. For now I'll take confidence in that saying and peacefully free myself.
I think it would be hardly believable if I told you than I don't remember much from my life; as if my whole childhood had been ripped away from myself. More likely, that I did not lived one at all. Some day, an unspecified one, I just began to exist in this earth; doing since that instant the role that until this day I had assigned; the same which for you I disposed and now I'm facing the consequence of my choice. Inquired thought is, that you probable went through the same as me, yet obviously in a different way.
At the epilogue of all, I found my mission quite interesting and entertaining. It was not common between humanity, and that made it unique, special, and just for me; something I had just for myself. The trill and excitement given to me were not comparable to any other pleasure that could be found. The procedure was consuming, always so specific, yet with such a variety of manners to perform it. To discover each one of them was incredibly suiting. To wake to the gently touch of moonlight over my face, the same time everybody else was submerged in their slumber. To find a singular piece of paper with a name and an address. Those hold nothing particular for me, but the intrigue was to find different information in the very same piece of paper with every passing night.
Each time was the same, until, in a moment I did not realise, it had all achieved a high degree of dullness; every part of it. To wake up another night, the same as the one before, which was in time, equal as the previous one. Another name, another address, another night to waste. Always the same, a monotonous routine which no longer possessed any trill nor emotion. At the time this state was reached, I initiated to sight things in a completely different point of view. I wondered about matters that in the near past held no importance to me. Now I wanted to find out, if what I was doing was really my only purpose on life.
That which was my only diversion was not a burden. Yet it was a burden I could not have the privilege to abandon. Not reduced were the times where I seriously considered giving an end to it all. Nevertheless, strength was not found within me. What would happen if I no longer fulfilled what was my only ordeal? Where should I derive if the lonely purpose for to exist, if it really was that way, was no longer? The fear of banishing was haunting my sleep. It was to continue being repressed by a vane life or to stop being at all. Both proposals meant barely one thing, suffering. In a form or another, there was no other phase to it. I was scared, me of whom most plead to spare their lives, I was afraid of doing so myself.
I was now seriously obstructed from the truth. If I wanted to find out, it would mean for me to delay my duty, which would lead to possible disappearance. Forced to conceal my own exasperation and terror, I became a mindless entity. It was preferable to not sense or feel anything at all than to duel every instant in the same dilemma. Thus, my desire to prorogue if my task was my only purpose had to be deeply buried in the obscure solitude of my soul; left to await for a light to arrive that could set it to freedom; to set me free. That light, now I realise, that part of me, it was waiting for you.
More to come. It may take long for I'm getting busy with school affairs. I shouldn't bee writing this at all. Just one thing, I want opinions on the matter if I should include dialogs or keep the monologue style. Thanks.
Hugs and kisses to my dearest Felouse. (coughcheckhisficscough)