Interview with Frodo Baggins:
So, Frodo, what's it like living in Valinor?
Well, it's really beautiful and everything, but it's kinda boring. Nobody to talk to but elves. Have you ever tried to have a conversation with an elf?
Uh, not really.
They're always talking in riddles, and all they ever wanna talk about is stars and trees and dumb stuff like that! Stupid elves! Who talked me into coming here anyways?
Um, I dunno. So, what was the worst part of the quest to destroy the one ring?
Stupid Gollum biting off my finger. Now everyone calls me nine-fingered Frodo. What's up with that? Why couldn't I get a cool name? Strider got a cool name, and he didn't save all Middle Earth. I did! Everyone calls Strider King Elessar. How cool is that? You would think I would get a cool name because I destroyed the Ring of Power, but noooooooo, everyone calls me nine-fingered Frodo!!! he looks up AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
What??? What is it??? I look around anxiously
A . . . sp-sp-p-spider
I look at the wall Oh, come on, you're freaking out over a tiny spider? I could understand if it was a tarantula or something, but that has got to be the tiniest spider I've ever seen! And you're screaming about it???
I HATE SPIDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he hides behind his chair Would you squish it he looks at me with those big blue eyes Please?
Oh, all right. I take off my shoe and whack the spider with it There! It's dead now.
Thank you.
I still say you're being a big baby.
Don't tell anybody I'm arachnophobic....please? he gives me the big blue puppy dog eyes again
Don't worry, I won't. I chuckle evilly That's all for now folks!
AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! Everyone heard that?!?!?!?!?
MUAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A/N: I'm so mean :-D