WAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR AI GETS PISSE AT YOU AND SENDS YOU A VIRUS WHICH TELEPORTS YIOU TO EVERY FRIGGIN LEVEL OR SCENE OF DIFFERENT MOVIES AND GAMES SO THE CHAPTER GETS FINISHED FASTER BECAUSE YOUR PRODUCERS (ME) ARE CHEAP AND DONT FEEL LIKE WRITING ONLY ABOUT HALO AND ALSO FEEL LIKE MAKING SHORT PARODIES. THIS IS A SPECIAL EDITION VERSION PPL. FEEL SPECIAL...TO THE MAX!
Ahhhhhhh...Snow. I love snow. I like it when i used to piss on snow and use it for a gravel ball and then stuff it up the ass of kids and they would die because my piss was contaminated and the coldness shocked them to eath...
MASTER CHIEF STARRING AS HIMSELF
"Uhhhh...MC? Are you dreaming about snow again?" asked Cortana.
CORTANA STARRING AS HERSELF
"How'd you know! GET OUTTA MY MIND!" screamed MC as he ran around.
STEWPIDLY FUNNILY SCRIPT BY (ME) I HOPE
"Shut up. I am your mind..." muttered Cortana.
"Does that mean im really a guy? Or am i a girl, because i have a woman in my mind? O MI GOD! THERES A LADII IN MI MIND!" screaned MC.
SPONSORED BY VIAGRA "ITS ALL GOOD"
"IM A FRIGGIN AI YOU STEWPID NICOMPOOP!" screamed Cortana, as she reached for her leg, put her hand in, and got out a capsule with the faint words "tylenol".
THIS COULDNT HAVE BEEN POOSSIBLE WITHOUT MI TRUSTY COMPUTER AND SOME GREEN TEA, WHICH THOUGH TASTED LKE CRAP I AM NOW ADDICTED TO
"Okay...can you make up your mind? First your in my mind, then your a woman in my mind, then your a machine in my mnd. And you also called me a guy and a girl at the same time, and right now just a machine and a nincompoop. God. You're such a guirl." sighed MC.
DISCLAIMER:I HAVE LEARNED TO WRITE THIS. I DONT OWN NO SHIT CAUSE THE GOVERNMENT TOOK EVERYHTING AWAY FROM ME WEN THY FOUND OUT I WAS A POWER RANGER. SUCH RACISTS. ILL BE NEXT TO THE QUIKI MART WITH APU dANCING FOR MONEY AND IF YOU SEE ME, SAY HI AND GIV ME MONY. HOMER WILL BE THERE TOO :).
"Damn it. WHY YOU CREATE ME HALSEY! WHY COULDNT IT BE MY OLDER SISTER!WHY ARE AIS STUCK ALIVE FOR 10 YEARS OR SOMETHING! WHY CANT I JUST FALL TO HELL! WHY WAS A CREATD A GUIRL!WHY!" screamed Coretana.
"Okay,...mental note. Ai's think they have feelings, and they are in your mind." noted MC.
"Forget about this. I'm blocking you."
"Wait...i still wanna know how you read my mind." said MC, but an away message popped up on the screen. It read
Dear Master Chief,
I'm hanging out with my buddies and kikin ass in Brute Force. I'm also playing LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!
Sincerely, Your mind
"Okay... so i gess im all on my own now." said MC, as he walked into a portal that appeared out of no where." His HUD said "Warning. Your frend Cortana has just sent you a virus and says "YOU STEWPID MOFO! YOU PUT CHEERIOS IN MY CHEESEBURGER! PREPARE TO GET SCREWED UP!"
AND NOW...TOO BEGIN. WE PRESENT YOU
THE JOURNEY AROUND THE GAMING WORLDIN A STORY!
THats THE ONLY TITLE I COULD THINKOF, AND EVEN IT IS CORNY AND COPYRIGHTED...I THINK.
PART 1
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. FUK U CORTANANANANANANANANA" screamed MC. He stepped in a portal, and suddenly appeared in a castle.
"Who's this guy. He seems sexy :)" says a girl.
"Shut up Allis. Your supposed to like the main character. Me. SORA!" said Sora.
"Shuddap. You couldn't even get your moma to like you Sora. I mean. WHO NAMES A BOY SORA.!" screamed a gray haired boy.
"YEA BUT HE HAS a V8GlN4!" said a duck.
"Are you smokin again Daffy?" said Sora. Then the boy ran and took out a key and some cards, and Cloud came out and sliced the duck.
Everyone in the room started arguing and MC just stood there while Allis just fell asleep."
"FUCK YOU ALL!" screamed MC and he took out a frag grenade and threw it. Everyone exploded. A portal appeared where he jumped in and escaped.
PART 2
"Go POKEBALL!" said a voice. MC opened his eyes, just to see a poke ball being thrown at him.
"What the hell do you take me for kid? said MC as he caught the ball and broke it.
"WHAT KIND OF POKEMON ARE YOU!" said the boy.
"ItS NOT A POKE MON ASH! YOU'RE SUCH A DUMASSS." said the orange head.
"Thats right. But i like your rat there. Mind if i catch him?" said MC.
"Nooooo" said Ash.
"Too bad" and MC threw a frag grenade at the Pikachu.
"How come the ba-" was the last words of Ash. The pokemon world exploded, but MC fell through another door.
PART 3
Where am i now?" thought MC. Suddenly a pink thing jumped out. It opend its mouth and suked him in. "WTF!" said MC as he was spitted out, and the pink thing now looked like a spartans head with rms and legs at the side. "FUKER!" said MC and he started punching the sh;t out of Kirby. But kirby didnt die, so nothing was happening, so MC quit and waited for anotoer portal.
PART 4
"tRUST IN THE fORCE...AND IT WILL GUIDE YOU!" said a deep voice.
"Hey! I know you! You're a fore-runner! The race which created the energy swords! Hey look! It's the light saber, the original energy blade that the covenant based the energy sword on!" said MC.
"I'm not a gfore-runner. I'm a human dipsh;t. Are you my father?" siad a skinny guy qwith blonde hair.
"Yes. Luke, I am your father...now hug me!"
"Hey wait. You aren't Vader!" said the boy.
"No shit sherlock. I mean im taller and biigger in green. Im like your dad times 100." sighed MC.
"No one disses my dad! He was a great man!"
"Puleze. He was a machine. He don't even look good."
"Damn you. Die!" said the boy. He swung the saber at him. The saber automatically blew up and got destroyed. "My arm! It's gone. That was my only good arm left!"
"Hate will lead to anger. Anger leads to suffering. Suffering leads to death. Death leads to hell. Young padawan, you must learn. Too bad you won't have a chance to." said MC, as he took out a plasma pistol and shot him in the head. A portal opened and he jumped in. "Is this "get da green dude" week? damn it im tired.
PART 5
"Tidus!"
"Luna!"
"Cortana!"
"What the f-k?" said a girl.
"Hey! Your on my girl mister!"
"I got a name tidus..."
"Oh sorry. I didn't mean to. You see. I was looking for a portal. Hehehehe. Sorry for kiling your friend here." said MC.
"KILLED?" said the boy. yOU PISS ME OFF. io CANT BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING. MY DAD IS SIN. AURON IS A GHOST. AND I SEEM TO BE A DREAM. ENIX SQUARE HAS GOT TO STOP SCREWING UP THESE FF!" said the boy. "Let's fight! One on One"
"Sure." said MC. Suddenly his HUD swirled, and then he saw a menu. "I use plasma rifle!" The shot missed. It was Tidus's turn.
"I SUMMON A DARK CREATURE. DEEP WITHIN THE GATES OF HELL AND DARKNESS. I CALL ON U! AVENGE YOUR FRIEND'S DEATH! IFRIT, FIRE DEMON!" said the boy, and then a fiery demon poopped outm of nowhere. "ATTACK! UNLEASH HELL ON HIM! FIREBALLZ!" said the boy, and then the demon shot 10 balls from the sky.
"Oh sh;t" said MC,and then he threw a fra grenade at Tidus.
"Hey! Thats not fair. You can't attack during my ataack! Its not fair!"
"Your demon is too slow." said MC in a grin.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO", and then Tidus exploded. But the Ifrit remained.
"What do you want!" asked MC. The demon shrugged and then ran to eat MC, when MC stook out a pinky. The Demon rammed into it and got smashed. "Fool.", but then the demon talked.
"I AM IFRIT. NO ONE DISGRACES IHM. TIME TO SHOW MY TRUE SELF AND MY TRUE POWER! I CALL UPON MY REAL POWERS. BAHAMUT AWAKEN!" said the beat. Then a dragon appeared in stead of the Ifrit. It was on fire. "Muwahahahahahahahahahaha. Look at my power mortal human." then the dragon shot a blast tht destoryed half the world. "BRING IT""This is too crazy. I'm leaving" said MNC, and then a portal came up and he jumped in.
"MUWAHAHAHA. Now to destroy the rest of the world." the dragon powered up and was about to shoot when a portal apeared.
"Sorry, forgot my grenade...you can continue destroying this world." said MC quickly, as he got the grenade and ran back.
PART 6
"Say hello to my little freind here!" said a guy.
"Well say hello to my frag grenade."
"HEY! WATCHA DOIN. WAT IS DIS SHAM EH?"
"bb." said MC as he hopped in his portal.
"As i was sayin, welcome to my little fr-" BOOOOOOOM.
PART 7
"I will not let you have princess Zelda!" said a tiny guy in green.
"Shutup ant." said a large MC, and he squashed the guy.
PART 8
"Hey! Are you one of the Goblin's merceneries?" said a guy in red and blue tights swinging on a web.
"No."
"Well...so. How's it like in a flying machine?"
"Dont know. How bout you with those webs?"
"Don't know. Hey. Can i get a ride in that machine? I gotta rescue my aunt."
"You can have my banshee. Here.", and then Spiderman hoped in while MC hopped in a porytal.
"HOW DO YOU FLY THIS TH-"said Spider man, and then he blew up.
PART 9
"Hey Guys! Its Mc my man." said a short blue hedgehog.
"Yo wassup my homie Sonic! And hows the genius. How's your arm knuckles?" said MC.
"Sup MC. Hi MC. Sup dawg. Mi arms fine thank you. Hows your bitch?"
"We broke up."
"Sorry, but since your here, you wanna help me kill eggman. We captured him and we are torturing him, but now we decided to kill him. We'll let you get him." said Knuckles.
"Thanks. Stupid egg-wuss-man." said MC as he took out a frag grenade and set it right in front of him, and shoved another one up his ass. "ONce we get out, i'll explode it. Peace out dude."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" BOOOOOOOOOOM
PART 10
"No. NOt Cedric!" said a voice.
"Fuck you Harry, oh wait. We'll let him live. We'll kill this green guy instead. AVADA KEDRAVA!" said a cold voice. The green jet of light streaked toward MC, buthis energy sheild deflected it and went to Harry, and Harry died. Since harry was bonded to Voldemort, they both died.
"What just happened?"
"HARRY!"
"wHATEVER. bYE BYE." AND mc JUMPED IN A PROTAL.
PART 11
"Can you hear me now? Good." said MC. "Cortana please cut the crap and stop blocking me. Come on. Let's finish this level. I mean. I'm geting overrun by pikmin here." said MC to his Mobile.
"The phone you have reached is terminated."
"DAMN WHERE YOU AT! THIS COSTS 100 ZENNY A SECOND. DAMNIT."
"Its pointless. The destination you have reached is terminated."
"Come on. The pikmin are bringing me to an onion shaped mach- HOLY SHIT IM GONNA BECOME ONE OF THEM. ITS GONNA EAT ME AND THEN IT S OGNNA TRANSFORM ME INTO PIKMIN. SAVE ME!"
"Your cost right now is 123645 zenny."
"Damn you...there's only one way of reaching her. Taking out her chip. Then she can't upload to anything to get a human form. She'll be deattached. MUWHAHAHAHAHA. YOU HEAR ME! ILL DO IT. MAYBE YOULL BECOME A PIKMIN ALSO. 3 2 1 ZE-"
"yawn That aws nice sleep. What's happening? Why are you mad?"
"You've been asleep this whole time! ill kill you Cortasna. But then where did te portals comfrom?"
"My step sis. Shes like my evil clone. If you want, i can delete her."
"Sure. Why not."
"Done, let's get a portal back to the level.
PART 12
"Snow! YAY" said a happy MC.
"Now to finish this shitty level!"
"Maybe tommorrow. Snow only comes once a year here you know. Im gonna hang out iwth some of the marines and covenat and covince hem to play capture the flag in the snow...without firearms. Just snowballs and snowaxes and anythingwith snow in it."
"ARE YOU CRAZY!"
"Shutup. You got your sleep. Now dont worry. They agreed already. I texted them on my t-mobile sidekick. They alreadyhave a fort. I 'll have one oin a minute. My only men are 10 marines, and 5 allegdly dead spartans against 5 thousand covenants. Seems fair enough. LET THE WAR BEGIN!"
"Oh brother." said Cortana.
END CHAPTER
A/N-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH hi. My name is c3pio, human cyborg relationship system. Just kidding...hehehehee. If you want more chapters like this in the future, tell me in your review, and always remeber. YOU'RE SPECIAL...TOO THE MAX! PEACE OUT AND HAPPY VALENTINE PEOPLE. REMEBER TO SEND ME HUGS AND KISSES IN YOUR REVIEWS. GET YOUR LOVERS GIFTS. C U.