Break- K'veer

Only death can conquer pride so strong. For the D'ni and for Yeesha, it was death that moved me to return.

I returned to Relto, to the island in the clouds. I returned to my parents, to my dear father and mother. I returned to my home, to the only place I thought healing could be found.

-

Part 7- Relto

It was a beautiful night. The kind of night that made Atrus feel young again; as young as when he'd first met Catherine. So it was whenever he returned here after a long absence. Book of D'ni

Stepping softly out onto the lush green grass and ground vines of Relto, Atrus breathed deeply. How he loved this Age of his daughter's. It was so calm and soothing- its peace penetrating his very soul as if it was a beautiful strain of music.

No, he thought, more like a beautiful living being. One that you can't help but love.

This mystical, island Age of Yeesha's was intoxicating for Atrus. Here he could spend hours on end, hardly even moving and not realizing the amount of time passing. It was something to do with the way the Age was so complete and so finished.

Or maybe it was just how it reminded him of Yeesha.

A weary sigh escaped Atrus' lips as he crossed his arms behind his back and began to stroll through Relto.

He missed his daughter so much that it hurt to think about. He could hardly stand the thought of her being as near as the Cleft and yet as far away as the Cleft. So often he had nearly linked to D'ni in plans to head up to the surface to visit her only to be stopped by Catherine. She insisted he leave Yeesha alone saying it was her time to find her path and, until she searched out Atrus or Catherine, that their presence would only distract her from that path. One time, and one time only, did Catherine allow him to visit the Cleft and then only because Atrus had become so worried about his daughter that Catherine could no longer stand to have him about. Not that the visit had been productive. Yeesha wasn't at the Cleft and even though Atrus waited a week, she never showed up.

Yahvo, let her be safe, he prayed for the hundredth time that day.

If anything ever happened to Yeesha, Atrus didn't know what he would do. She and Catherine were everything to him and without Yeesha, Atrus could never be whole.

A few stars shown high above the island, winking at Atrus as he passed below them. Also a moon, white and luminous, hung just above the visible horizon as if, at any moment, it might slip away again.

Stopping, Atrus watched the night sky, his breath leaving moisture trails in the cold air. Where in the universe was he? And where in the universe was Yeesha? Often he had tried to find different constellations in an effort to place Relto in a location he might latter be able to find, but there were never enough stars to be seen from the island. The atmosphere was too think- only allowing the brightest, most persistent stars to be seen.

With a final sigh, Atrus was about to return to the small hut and link back to Tomahna when instead he heard the sound of another person linking in.

Who could that be? he wondered, turning.

A shimmering figure appeared out of the air in the direction Atrus was facing. The air around the person bubbled for a moment before the body became solid.

"Yeesha!" said Atrus surprised, recognizing the figure at once.

"Father," cried Yeesha as she rushed up to him and flung her arms tightly around his neck.

-

Strange, searingly bright flashes seemed to dance and flicker in that darkness, accompanied by a low, threatening rumble that exploded suddenly in a great crash of sound. Book of Atrus

It was going to rain soon on Relto. Already a massive black cloud that consumed the sky was approaching the tinny island, ready to engulf it. The air had grown increasingly still which each passing moment till at last it merely hung thick in the atmosphere, like a heavy cover, waiting for the storm to break.

Atrus was standing at one of the wide windows in the hut, staring out across the cloud covered world. Yeesha was sitting on the bare floor behind him, legs crossed under her and tears leaving wet streaks down her splotchy face. Seeing her like that reminded him so strongly of when she was a little child, of only three years, running along in Tomahna.

That day he had gone out collecting soil samples for his never ending experiments which, after a lot of sweet talking, he managed to convince Catherine to allow him to take their child along for. To Atrus that had been the highlight of his day because he adored his little girl and would have taken her everywhere with him if Catherine only had let him. Yet she was only being practical and reasonable in typically preventing him from doing that- which was just as well for Atrus found it hard to be reasonable where Yeesha was concerned. That day though, Catherine agreed to Yeesha accompanying him since it was only to be a short trip.

Atrus remembered vividly how much fun it had been hiking up small rocks, Yeesha's hand firmly clasped in his own or, when higher climbs had to be made, her small body clinging tight to his as he carried her along with him. They had stared at lizards, he had even caught one for Yeesha to look closer at and scream with giggles when it skittered away again. Yeesha even helped him by gathering small pebbles for his experiments, though he never told her over fifty were just a few too many to use! It was a perfect afternoon till Yeesha got hurt.

He had turned away for only a second- just to make sure his sample was correct- when he heard her scream in pain. How he remembered the fear which flew to his heart then- the thoughts that she might be injured, even dying, blocked all other logic from his mind. In a panic he shouted for her then, not able to tell immediately where she was, only to spot her the next moment crouching beside a boulder. She was bent over crying, covered in dirt and with her clothes torn in spots- but she was alive. Atrus had breathed a sigh of relief and walked over and bent down beside her, asking to see what was wrong. The poor child's knee had been badly skinned from falling off the boulder she was clambering all over yet nothing else was wrong with her besides that.

"Shhh, Yeesha," he said then, gently lifting her into his arms and kissing the top of her head. "It's alright...it's alright..."

He only wished he could do the same now. Cradle his daughter in his arms and assure her everything was alright now, he was there now. But Yeesha wasn't three anymore.

"Say something, Father," she pleaded, eyes filling to the brim with fresh, unshed, tears.

How he wanted to, how he wanted to do so much more then that. Atrus wanted to take away all the pain she was now feeling, write it away or bury it in the ground where she could never find it again...

For the first time in his life though, Atrus could find no words of comfort to give to his daughter.

A minute later, Yeesha looked away, her whole body trembling violently from sobs.

"I knew it," she said between ragged breaths. "You think me wicked."

Immediately, Atrus crouched down on his heels beside her and stroked her short hair lovingly. Shaking his head, he said so softly it was almost a whisper,

"Never that, Yeesha. You know me enough to realize I could never think you wicked."

"But I have failed you!" she insisted. "I did the same things as..."

Even though Yeesha didn't complete her thought, Atrus knew who she was referring to; his two sons, Sirrus and Achenar. They had broken Atrus' heart in the past when they ignored his teachings and destroyed the lives of so many. In some ways, he was certain their evil deeds effected Yeesha and the decisions that she made in relation to how her parents would see her after she made them. He never truly thought about it till now but Atrus couldn't doubt that he was right.

"No you didn't," he said with a smile. "You have made your mother and I so proud, Yeesha. So proud! And I know the Maker has set great things in place for you- and you will perform them all. Trust in the Maker, Yeesha, then you will see what I do when I look at you."

Turning her head, Yeesha focused her red-rimmed eyes on him in wonder.

"I thought you did not believe in the Maker."

And I didn't for a long time, he thought Atrus, remembering a journal entry he once wrote, months after Yeesha had left on her journey to the Cleft.

I am not able to understand, only to understand more. The picture that I wish to examine is not static, it is growing and living. Even as I understand how the hinges of a door allow me to open it, I find that it leads to a room even larger than the first. But I think perhaps that is part of wisdom. Knowing that I cannot know all, understanding that I cannot understand all. If the Maker's creation was understandable would I not find the Maker something less than great, would I not consider myself equal with the Maker? It is a tribute then to His greatness when I find myself more confused even at the very instant that I have gained insight. Personal Journal Excerpt

"I found that, through the very Art I have been taught, He was revealing Himself to me. And that to try and ignore Him when He was so clearly shown, would be a great folly."

Outside the rain had begun to fall. Its musical sound could be heard as it beat against the roof and spilled off of it onto the ground. One loud thunderclap rumbled deeply causing the small island to vibrate at the noise.

Atrus, what do you see? asked the long familiar voice.

I see rain, Grandmother. I see my only daughter is distraught.

Good. Now, what can you do? What would I have done?

Ti'ana... Anna and rain. To her rain was something magical, something healing.

Grinning like a small boy as the idea overtook him, Atrus pulled Yeesha to her feet and led her to the door. Then, stepping outside himself, he lifted his face to the sky and spread his arms out, allowing the cool water to stream down his face and body, soaking him. It felt glorious and every shower was just like his first surprising experience, never growing old.

Checking, Atrus saw Yeesha also outside in the rain now, her hair plastered to her head and clothes stuck to her like another skin. She was dancing, wild and free, the cares being lifted from her with each spin. Twirling to a stop, she doubled over with laughter until finally sinking to her knees, mouth remaining in a broad smile.

"Rain!" she shouted to the dark sky. "Rain!"