A/N: More cameos by my reviewers! Lots of chaos and insanity! YES!
Chapter Nine: In Which Haldir Gets some Loving and People Come to Freak Out Others
"Those two...spooky...my brain...fried." Pippin says.
"Brain fried? Like a brain freeze?" Boromir asks.
"No. It's sizzling and being turned into mush." Pippin says.
"I feel like jumping off a cliff." Denethor whines.
"Look. You're the mascot. If children see the mascot jump off a cliff, then they will too!" Aragorn says.
"Oh, sure. Like you know."
"Actually, I do."
Faramir and Sam have been sleeping, Faramir in a booth, and Sam under the stove. Haldir is playing solitaire and muttering. Merry is pouring himself a 48-ounce glass of vodka. Arwen is muttering, and Eowyn is off at anger management.
"Can someone shut her up?" Denethor says.
"Who's talking?"
"That one!" Denethor says, pointing a finger at Arwen.
"Me??"
"You're the governor's daughter!" The maid from Pirates of the Caribbean says, rushing in and walking out as fast as she came.
"My daddy is not just a governor! He's a lord of a large Elf-haven!" Arwen screams after the maid.
"Your daddy?" Legolas asks.
"Hey, Lego, I've heard you call your father daddy." Arwen says.
"Nuh-uh!"
"Don't make me use this batter!!" Arwen screams.
"Nice rock and pool...wisssh...cheessse!' Gollum says.
Sam rolls out from under the stove.
"Eep! What's he been doing under there?" Arwen asks.
"What? Where's the ale? Show me the money!" Sam mutters.
"Is he talking to me?" Arwen asks.
"No, he's talking to...er..." Aragorn says.
"Yes, Mr. Smarty?" Boromir says.
"Oh, shut up!"
"That was cold."
Boromir goes to sit down and gets a 50-ounce glass of ale.
"You're not going to save any for the customers!" Merry yells after him.
"So what?"
Merry resumes drinking his vodka.
"What on earth?" Aragorn asks, as four girls walk in.
One, the seeming leader, or first one in, is wearing gothic clothes and has black hair with red streaks. The second one in is wearing a shirt that says, "Marry Me, Merry!" and just looks like an all around Merry fan. The third one is looking just casual, not anything special but has a shirt on that says, "Get a Life, Elrond, and Move Out of the Closet." The last one in is wearing a shirt that says, "Fallen Angel" and black jeans.
"Welcome, tasssty little girlsssesss. We welcomesss you to our busssinesss." Gollum hisses.
"Away, freak, before I stove your head in!" Sam says. Needless to say, he's gotten up.
"You looksss like Cinderella, with all thossse bruisssesss and cindersss on your facesss." Gollum says, slinking off.
"Cinderella?" Aragorn asks.
The girls walk up to the counter.
"I want a Burger and 3 orders of fries and a small coke." The first one, Pyro Dragon 117, says.
"I want chicken nuggets, fries, and a coke." The second, Annabel, says.
"Three cheeseburgers and fries." The third, Orliey, says.
"A pizza with marmalade." The fourth one, fallenangel3490, says.
"We don't serve pizza."
"WHAT?? LEGOLAS, WHAT IS YOUR FREAKIN' PROBLEM?" She yells.
"Is there a pizza chef in the house?" Legolas meekly asks, backing away from the counter.
Everyone looks at Sam.
"WHAT?" He says.
"Aren't you the chef?"
"So?"
"Make her a pizza, for Pete's sake!" Arwen yells.
"Alright!" Sam says, though he has no idea how to make a pizza.
Sam takes out some dough and shapes it, pours marinara sauce on it, and puts some cheese on it. He sticks it in the oven and leaves it there.
Annabel, also called Lily the Bucklander, is running around, looking for Merry. She finds him behind the bar counter and pulls up a stool and sits down.
"You have beautiful eyes." She says.
"Uh...thanks." Merry says.
Meanwhile, Pyro Dragon 117 is terrorizing Arwen.
"You are freaky, you know that?"
Arwen continues to bread the chicken.
"You should just have left, you know?"
She pretends not to hear.
"Because I think Aragorn is better off without you."
With that, Arwen jumps on Pyro Dragon 117, trying to strangle her. She would have succeeded had not Boromir, Aragorn, and Legolas jumped in to save her. And that was before Arwen jumped on her again. Boromir grabbed a fry basket and hit Arwen with it, who then turned and slapped Boromir, who fell backwards on Legolas, who hit Aragorn with his bow, who let go of Pyro Dragon 117, who scurried away and on top of a table.
And then, the door opened as four more people walked in! The first, a girl, is wearing a shirt that says, "I Love Aragorn!!" and jeans. The second is wearing a shirt that says, "I'm a Dreamer....And an Elf, too." The next is wearing a shirt that says, "Shieldmaiden for Ever!!" And the last is wearing a shirt that says, "Haldir is Hott!"
"HI HALDIR!!!" The one, crazy-haldir-fancier, says.
"?" Haldir thinks, like, "Who are you?"
crazy-haldir-fancier runs over to Haldir, who is sitting in a booth and sipping tea.
"I love you, Haldir!" she says.
"I...er...that's nice." Haldir says.
"I know. Isn't it?" the girl says, putting her arm around Haldir.
Haldir just looks creeped out.
The other girls walk up to the counter and order their food, which they receive and go sit down with the other fans who have previously entered.
"Hi, Legolas." Pyro Dragon 117 says, looking at Legolas.
"Uh. Hi." Legolas says. He's pretty freaked out that all these girls keep saying hi to him.
Meanwhile, Orliey is criticizing Elrond on 'letting himself go by living in the janitor's closet'.
"Oh, sure. What do you know about me?" Elrond scoffs.
"More than you think." She says.
"FREAK!!!" Elrond screams, running into the janitor's closet.
A/N: Well, I hope you enjoyed it! There will be a part two, and the other cameo appearances of the previous chapter will return, and more people are always welcomed to request a cameo! This means PopcornLeader and boobtubesngrass are coming back!!
Chapter Nine: In Which Haldir Gets some Loving and People Come to Freak Out Others
"Those two...spooky...my brain...fried." Pippin says.
"Brain fried? Like a brain freeze?" Boromir asks.
"No. It's sizzling and being turned into mush." Pippin says.
"I feel like jumping off a cliff." Denethor whines.
"Look. You're the mascot. If children see the mascot jump off a cliff, then they will too!" Aragorn says.
"Oh, sure. Like you know."
"Actually, I do."
Faramir and Sam have been sleeping, Faramir in a booth, and Sam under the stove. Haldir is playing solitaire and muttering. Merry is pouring himself a 48-ounce glass of vodka. Arwen is muttering, and Eowyn is off at anger management.
"Can someone shut her up?" Denethor says.
"Who's talking?"
"That one!" Denethor says, pointing a finger at Arwen.
"Me??"
"You're the governor's daughter!" The maid from Pirates of the Caribbean says, rushing in and walking out as fast as she came.
"My daddy is not just a governor! He's a lord of a large Elf-haven!" Arwen screams after the maid.
"Your daddy?" Legolas asks.
"Hey, Lego, I've heard you call your father daddy." Arwen says.
"Nuh-uh!"
"Don't make me use this batter!!" Arwen screams.
"Nice rock and pool...wisssh...cheessse!' Gollum says.
Sam rolls out from under the stove.
"Eep! What's he been doing under there?" Arwen asks.
"What? Where's the ale? Show me the money!" Sam mutters.
"Is he talking to me?" Arwen asks.
"No, he's talking to...er..." Aragorn says.
"Yes, Mr. Smarty?" Boromir says.
"Oh, shut up!"
"That was cold."
Boromir goes to sit down and gets a 50-ounce glass of ale.
"You're not going to save any for the customers!" Merry yells after him.
"So what?"
Merry resumes drinking his vodka.
"What on earth?" Aragorn asks, as four girls walk in.
One, the seeming leader, or first one in, is wearing gothic clothes and has black hair with red streaks. The second one in is wearing a shirt that says, "Marry Me, Merry!" and just looks like an all around Merry fan. The third one is looking just casual, not anything special but has a shirt on that says, "Get a Life, Elrond, and Move Out of the Closet." The last one in is wearing a shirt that says, "Fallen Angel" and black jeans.
"Welcome, tasssty little girlsssesss. We welcomesss you to our busssinesss." Gollum hisses.
"Away, freak, before I stove your head in!" Sam says. Needless to say, he's gotten up.
"You looksss like Cinderella, with all thossse bruisssesss and cindersss on your facesss." Gollum says, slinking off.
"Cinderella?" Aragorn asks.
The girls walk up to the counter.
"I want a Burger and 3 orders of fries and a small coke." The first one, Pyro Dragon 117, says.
"I want chicken nuggets, fries, and a coke." The second, Annabel, says.
"Three cheeseburgers and fries." The third, Orliey, says.
"A pizza with marmalade." The fourth one, fallenangel3490, says.
"We don't serve pizza."
"WHAT?? LEGOLAS, WHAT IS YOUR FREAKIN' PROBLEM?" She yells.
"Is there a pizza chef in the house?" Legolas meekly asks, backing away from the counter.
Everyone looks at Sam.
"WHAT?" He says.
"Aren't you the chef?"
"So?"
"Make her a pizza, for Pete's sake!" Arwen yells.
"Alright!" Sam says, though he has no idea how to make a pizza.
Sam takes out some dough and shapes it, pours marinara sauce on it, and puts some cheese on it. He sticks it in the oven and leaves it there.
Annabel, also called Lily the Bucklander, is running around, looking for Merry. She finds him behind the bar counter and pulls up a stool and sits down.
"You have beautiful eyes." She says.
"Uh...thanks." Merry says.
Meanwhile, Pyro Dragon 117 is terrorizing Arwen.
"You are freaky, you know that?"
Arwen continues to bread the chicken.
"You should just have left, you know?"
She pretends not to hear.
"Because I think Aragorn is better off without you."
With that, Arwen jumps on Pyro Dragon 117, trying to strangle her. She would have succeeded had not Boromir, Aragorn, and Legolas jumped in to save her. And that was before Arwen jumped on her again. Boromir grabbed a fry basket and hit Arwen with it, who then turned and slapped Boromir, who fell backwards on Legolas, who hit Aragorn with his bow, who let go of Pyro Dragon 117, who scurried away and on top of a table.
And then, the door opened as four more people walked in! The first, a girl, is wearing a shirt that says, "I Love Aragorn!!" and jeans. The second is wearing a shirt that says, "I'm a Dreamer....And an Elf, too." The next is wearing a shirt that says, "Shieldmaiden for Ever!!" And the last is wearing a shirt that says, "Haldir is Hott!"
"HI HALDIR!!!" The one, crazy-haldir-fancier, says.
"?" Haldir thinks, like, "Who are you?"
crazy-haldir-fancier runs over to Haldir, who is sitting in a booth and sipping tea.
"I love you, Haldir!" she says.
"I...er...that's nice." Haldir says.
"I know. Isn't it?" the girl says, putting her arm around Haldir.
Haldir just looks creeped out.
The other girls walk up to the counter and order their food, which they receive and go sit down with the other fans who have previously entered.
"Hi, Legolas." Pyro Dragon 117 says, looking at Legolas.
"Uh. Hi." Legolas says. He's pretty freaked out that all these girls keep saying hi to him.
Meanwhile, Orliey is criticizing Elrond on 'letting himself go by living in the janitor's closet'.
"Oh, sure. What do you know about me?" Elrond scoffs.
"More than you think." She says.
"FREAK!!!" Elrond screams, running into the janitor's closet.
A/N: Well, I hope you enjoyed it! There will be a part two, and the other cameo appearances of the previous chapter will return, and more people are always welcomed to request a cameo! This means PopcornLeader and boobtubesngrass are coming back!!