Another weird story requested by my friend. I may post a longer alternative ending to this story when she goes online again. But for now, enjoy.
PS: Characters are creations of Eoin Colfer (poor guy, no one quite knows how to call him).
Another Fowl Story
Once upon a time, a little kiddy called Artemis was walking through the forest
This little kiddy had black hair and blue eyes.
This little kiddy was smart.
This little kiddy was RICH.
This little kiddy had a big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler.
Why this big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard had a silly name like Butler is unknown to the general public.
So anyway, at this point of time, this little kiddy called Artemis and his big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler were walking in the forest.
Suddenly, this little kiddy called Artemis and his big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler met a small, little fairy thingy.
This small little fairy thingy was called Holly.
This small little fairy thingy did not like being called a small little fairy thingy, and would prefer itself to be referred to as an elf, but as it is not the narrator, it can't do a thing about it.
Well, alright. Since this small little fairy thingy had a blaster, it shall now be a called an elf from now on.
When this little kiddy called Artemis and his big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler met the elf, they were not unprepared.
Oh no, they had sunglasses on.
No, not for impressing the elf with their handsome good looks, but for self-defense.
How so? Because it's a commonly known fact that elves don't punch people with sunglasses out of courtesy.
All those broken pieces of glass can poke people, you know.
Being poked is not a very nice feeling.
So the elf did not punch the little kiddy called Artemis and his big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler.
Instead, it walked right into their trap, because it was too busy being courteous to these glasses-clad people.
The elf made sure it went into the trap courteously, too, because it was a well brought up elf.
So, boys and girls, we must all learn from this little story about the little kiddy called called Artemis and his big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler.
We must never be too courteous to people who wear sunglasses whom we meet in the forest, especially if they are a little kiddy called Artemis and his big, hulking gorilla of a bodyguard called Butler, and especially more so if you are an elf called Holly.