January Challenge – The Secret is Out

"You know a girl could get so cold she could end up with Hypothermia and in hospital." Abby complained as she pulled her jacket closer to her body.

"Then you'll get that breakfast in bed that you were talking about." Carter answered without taking a beat. They sat together on the stage waiting for someone to come to their rescue. "How much longer do you think they'll be?"

"Harvey said they would be back in about an hour. They were halfway to St. Louis when we called. They hadn't realised we were still in the building." Abby answered as she sniffed, wiping her gloved hand across her nose.

"It was his wife that asked us to go and make sure the urn was off. Why didn't she remember?" Carter asked rather harshly.

"Don't blame Ina. She's getting old." Abby defended the woman, who was like a second mother to everyone who attended meeting in Trinity United Church.

"Okay, but if I end up with frostbite or something worse then it's your fault." He complained.

"Stop your whining. You are acting like such a baby." She nudged him with her elbow, just to make her point he yelped in pain.

They sat in silence for a few minutes watching as their breath made clouds in front of them. John swiped at his nose this time. He turned to look at Abby. She looked tiny, hidden under the bulk of clothing she was wearing. January was a bitch of a month when it came to the weather and she had wrapped warmly for it but not enough for being locked in an old church hall with no heating. He watched as her teeth began to chatter. She immediately pulled her scarf further up around her face, covering more of her chin and mouth. He stretched his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close. "John, I'm all right." She protested pulling away. She hated the way that he babied her sometimes.

"I was only trying to help." He told her with a sullen look on his face.

"I know you were but we are both as cold as each other so it won't make any difference." She told him as she took his gloved hand into her own.

"Abby." Carter started to speak. Abby turned to look at him and nodded. "What you said earlier on, was it true?"

"Was what true?" She answered, roughly knowing what he was talking about.

"What you said while you were talking?"

Flashback

"Thank you Henry. Now we have a treat tonight. Abby is going to talk for the first time in many years. She should be an inspiration to a lot of you people out there. She's been with us a long time and I hope you get something from her." Harvey walked down from the podium as Abby cautiously made her way up.

She scanned the crowd before taking her place in front of the microphone. "Hi, I'm Abby and I'm an alcoholic." She paused allowing everyone to say hello back. "I've been sober for three years, four months, three weeks and five days. I could go into hours for you but I don't want to bore you. Before my relapse three years ago I had been sober for almost six years. Something happened to me just before I started going to meetings back then that I have never spoken about before. But now I feel it is time." She paused again, allowing herself to gather the strength to speak. "I married at a young age to a man I thought I was in love with. We were both destined to be doctors but realised that we couldn't afford to both do school at the same time. So it was agreed that because I had my nursing degree I would work as a nurse until he finished school and then he would work to do the same for me. It was a great plan at first. Worked wonders, although I did work myself into the ground taking any overtime I could, just to put food on the table. That food slowly became more and more alcohol. I didn't see it at first but every night I would drink at least six beers, a bottle of wine and maybe a few tequila shots. Now as a nurse I knew it wasn't healthy but it was my life up till then. My husband and I weren't really speaking to each other. The occasional argument caused the occasional make-up and from one such make up I became pregnant. My life was spiralling further and further out of control and a baby just wasn't an option so I had an abortion." She couldn't believe she was telling a room full of strangers her inner most secrets but some how it felt right. She felt as if a weight was being taken from her shoulders and she could finally fly free. "Sitting in the doctors office waiting on my appointment I decided then and there that my life had to change. After I had the operation I went straight to my first meeting and keep coming apart from my relapse three years, four months, three weeks and five days ago. So as you see if I can do it, anyone can. I am now a divorced from my husband, have been for a while actually. I finally became a doctor after many years of struggling to pay school fees and you know what I am happy. For once in my life I can truly say I am happy. Thank you for listening." She smiled as she walked back to her seat. The smile was one of relief and happiness because for the first time in a long time she was.

End Flashback

"You heard that. I didn't think you were here then." Abby quietly said. She knew she had told an entire room but if she had known Carter was there then her story would have been different.

"Yeah, I arrived just after you started. I stood at the back beside Harvey." Carter said. "Harvey spoke to me as you were talking but I can't remember anything that he said. I was so intent on listening to you I tuned him out but I do remember what he said afterwards. He said that he had never been prouder than he was right at that moment. And I have to say I agreed with him. Abby you sounded so strong up there. Stronger than you have ever sounded before. I will admit I was slightly shocked, okay a lot shocked by what you said. Maybe shocked isn't the right word. I was a little annoyed that I was hearing this at the same time as the room full of strangers instead all the times before when we have talked."

"I know Carter and I am sorry. I honestly thought you arrived well after I had spoken. And I know I should have told you about this many years ago but the timing just never seemed right. And also sometimes when I think about it I get so annoyed with myself, or I get sad but most of all I am ashamed of myself for not being able to go through with it." Carter listened to the emotion in her voice. I had been a while since he had last heard that kind of emotion. In fact the last time was when Eric had been diagnosed as manic-depressive. Carter placed his arm back around her shoulder and drew her close. This time she allowed it, laying her head on his shoulder.

When he lifted her head to look into her eyes, he saw the single tear that had rolled down her cheek. "Abby, you know that whenever you need to talk I am there for you. You can come to me whenever you want."

Abby smiled at the man in front of her. Looking into his eyes, she knew she could trust him. The same way she knew she could trust him when they were trapped in the hospital together. "Thank you Carter."

They sat wrapped in one another's arms for a while until Carter moved towards the window. "Abby look, it's snowing."

Abby got up and followed him towards the window. Sure enough, the dark sky was now peppered with little white snowflakes falling from he sky. " My favourite colour." She stated. Carter looked at her as if she was mad. "White, I used to love that colour." Again he looked at her with a strange look on his face. "I loved the snow as a little kid. I remember when my dad would take me down to the local park and go sledding. I loved whizzing down that hill wrapped in his arms. I felt so protected. I didn't feel that kind of protection again for a long time."

"When was that?" Carter asked.

"When I lay in your arms at night." She simply stated. Carter was dumbfounded. He hadn't realised just how much she had relied on him. "I never said it to you Carter, but I did love you." She told him. "Still do." She whispered.

"Oh Abby." He gasped as he took her into his arms. "I love you too." She snuggled her face into his chest, suddenly feeling warm again. She reached up to kiss him, for the first time in a while. His lips still felt the same as they always had. "When he pulled away he looked deep into her eyes and asked. "You said white used to be your favourite colour, what is it now?"

"Brown, the colour of you eyes." He almost melted again when she told him that. "The colour of eyes I hope my children may have one day."

Just as she said that the door to the church finally opened and Harvey and Ina walked in. "We are so sorry you two, what are we like. I hope you weren't too cold?"

"No we were all right Harvey. Better that we used to be." Carter stated simply as he led Abby from the church, arms wrapped around one another, headed for home.

A.N – Another month, another challenge and one that I have finally joined in on. I enjoyed this fic and have had it in my head for about a week and only finally got it on computer in time. Got a little fluffy towards the end but I hope it's all right. Good Luck to everyone. – Lu x.