Chapter Two

"Did you know that there are several kinds of Twinkies?"

Scully ground her teeth, "Really!"

"Yes, there's butterscotch, and cream-filled, and chocolate…"

Mulder had talked about nothing other than Twinkies for the past 20 minutes.

"My favorite are the cupcake ones with vanilla and chocolate icing. Can you believe that? Both! Ingenius!"

"We're here," Scully said shortly.

"Where?"

"The house we're supposed to investigate, Mulder. Haven't you been paying attention at all, or are you so absorbed in your Twinkies that you can't even notice what we're doing?"

Mulder slowly swallowed his Twinkie and got out of the car, muttering, "Agent Non-Twinkie Face…"

Scully sighed and slammed the car door shut. Following Mulder up the walkway, she checked for her gun in her right-hand pocket. Feeling its cold handle, she walked faster to catch up with Mulder, who was nearly running.

The next instant, they had walked into the unlocked house.

The two FBI agents weren't in the brightly lit house for five seconds when Mulder took a huge sniff. Turning to a frowning Scully, he yelled excitedly, "TWINKIES!"

He ran into the next room, laughing hysterically.

Scully tore after him, freaked out. What the hell was going on?

She entered the room Mulder had gone into, and was shocked to see three things: a humongous pile of Twinkies, Mulder, and the missing girl.

"What the, how did, what the!" she exclaimed.

"I can explain," a voice said from behind.

Scully turned and saw an old, wrinkled man with thick black bifocals looking wearily at the girl and Mulder (both were eating Twinkies), "Who are you!"

"I," the old man began, "Am Doctor Glucose Mosco Bledviel Zomble Boobleboppin. I am the reason these two are obsessed with Twinkies. You see, I created a super mosquito. Instead of drawing blood, it became addicted to Twinkies. It mated with a regular species of mosquitoes. This created a hybrid generation of mosquitoes. This generation depended on blood, but also carried the Twinkie gene."

"So, are you saying that these two are getting cavities because of your damn mosquitoes?" Scully demanded.

Doctor Glucose Mosco Bledviel Zomble Boobleboppin sighed, "Yes. But I can reverse the process with a simple antidote."

Scully was still a little a confused, "Why was the girl drawn here?"

The doctor shrugged, "The mosquito must have injected something into her, like an instinct that told her that there were plenty of Twinkies here."

"Did someone say Twinkies?" Mulder asked, butterscotch icing all over his hands.

Ten minutes later, Dr. Glucose Mosco Bledviel Zomble Boobleboppin had injected the antidote in the girl and was about to do the same to Mulder. As the needle entered Mulder's skin, he dropped his Twinkie. He finally felt normal.

He then had an overwhelming urge for spinach…