Privacy by SLynn

Disclaimer: It's all mine, because yeah, this is what I'd do with my free time if I actually owned these characters.

Chapter 16: Sinking Feeling

Greg made it in to work early that night. He had plenty to do and needed to just be out of the way and working. After his appointment he'd gone back to Nick's but hadn't really slept. He wasn't sure if he'd make it through tonight, but he'd have to try. Making his way to trace, he wasn't there long before he was interrupted.

"Greg," Warrick called out ending his conversation with Hodges over a fiber sample found at the Warner house.

They both looked up at him with surprise. Warrick's voice was louder then he normally chose to talk, much louder.

"What's up?" Greg asked, turning from Hodges to face him.

"You tell me?" Warrick asked in return putting two evidence bags into his hands.

"What's this?"

"I don't know. No one knows because you mislabeled them. Again. I can't cover for you on this one man. Not after all the crap that's gone on lately."

"Listen," Greg said standing up and moving to the door, speaking in lower voices, "I'll fix it. I can. Just give me a few minutes, let me wrap…"

"No. Not this time. You can explain it yourself to Grissom. He wants to see you right after the shift meeting."

"Warrick, please. I'm already on thin ice…"

"Sorry, no can do. I'm not going down on this one like Nick did on the last."

Greg said nothing more, just watched him go before turning back around to find Hodges grinning at him.

"Just page me when you know what it is," he said shortly before leaving himself.

Greg walked briskly down the hallway with the evidence bags in hand before turning into break room for the start of shift meeting. He sat in the back and held onto them throughout. Greg listened as Grissom read off the assignments, but only really heard the part about Sara and him handling the diary and nothing else. As soon as it broke up he did his best to glare at Warrick and headed off to Grissom's office.

"Shut the door behind you," he said without looking up.

Greg did and then tossed the bags onto Grissom's desk.

"What is that exactly?" he asked as he sat down.

"Leftovers from the break room refrigerator."

Greg nodded and said nothing. It was all part of the plan.

"Shouldn't you be yelling at me?"

"We'll save it for when we have an audience," he said with a smile.

Grissom had arranged for Warrick to confront Greg in front of three different people with three different stories regarding the evidence bags. Those three people were all ones that Grissom suspected to have a grudge against Greg for whatever reason and could reasonably be assumed to know the details of both the Jones and Fenton cases. They'd give it a week and see if any new stories surfaced containing some of their new 'facts' and then they'd know where the mole was. Because even if Grissom didn't know who the mole was, he was certain now someone in the lab was talking directly with Anderson from the Sun.

They sat and talked for a few minutes; occasionally Grissom would raise his voice and say something random as one of the suspects walked by. And they all walked by. The accusations all ended with Greg being in there now with Grissom getting the book thrown at him.

After they'd all gone by, Hodges twice, Grissom said he should get to work but try not to look to happy if he could help it. And that it would be best if he and Warrick stayed out of each others way as well. Greg nodded and thought he could do that easily enough. Aside from being apart of a sting operation, that was cool, he didn't really have much else to be happy about right now.

The first thing he did was the most awkward. He found Sara. She was in the AV room, reviewing the diary as was their assignment. He hovered in the door for a moment feeling very much aware that the last words they'd spoken were full of anger.

"I haven't found much," she said without turning towards him, "I mean nothing concerning how she actually got the Tetrodotoxin or when she put it into the salad dressing."

Greg nodded and walked into the room now, caught.

"The last page, the one you found, is the only one that references it at all."

"So does it look like a forgery?" he asked sitting down beside her to see for himself.

"No," she answered with a shake of her head, "or if it is it's a real good one. We can have it run just to be sure but it looks legitimate, it just doesn't make sense."

"Anything in it for trace?"

"No, no hair, fiber, blood. Nothing. We got some prints but they're all the victims."

"So it's definitely not intentional. She was killed."

Sara just nodded at this. She didn't want him to ask what she was positive he would next.

"How?"

Still flipping through the diary she told him.

"Drown."

"In the bath tub."

Sara nodded. He'd kind of assumed that.

"They found valium in her system."

It was Greg's turn to nod. He felt numb. Part of him felt that he should see it for himself, should have been able too at the scene even. Get it out of the way. This wasn't their first drowning victim and it wouldn't be their last. Another part of him was relieved. Greg wasn't sure he was ready. He briefly wondered if Sara had yet but knew she probably did. That she'd come in early last night specifically to see the crime scene photos.

"Now what?" he asked.

She considered returning that question to him. Sara had no idea what to do, but not in regards to the case.

"Well, I've arranged for us to meet with Danielle Carson's parents' tomorrow afternoon at three, down at the station. Brass is joining us."

"Okay, what about tonight?"

"Tonight we go back to the scene, see if anything was missed."

"Aren't we just working the diary?" Greg asked, confused.

"Yes, but we never got to see Danielle's room. She probably spent most of her time writing the diary there and just hid it in Allyson's."

"So when do we leave?"

"After you talk with Catherine. She has some questions about the robbery."

Greg nodded and stood up.

"I'll find her and then come back."

Sara didn't look up so he assumed she was alright with that. He got half way to the door before coming back and sitting down again.

"Can we take our break together?" he asked.

Sara looked at him and knew he wanted to at least try and talk it out. She smiled and nodded at him, agreeing. She hated the feeling in her stomach that was caused by this fight. Hated feeling so ill at ease around him.

"Good," he said, answering his own question, "I'll be back soon then."

Greg left the room with a smile, feeling a little better. Dr. Jennings had convinced him to at least broach the subject with Sara. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to do it, but he was going to try. He felt sick about fighting with her. And the thought of them actually breaking up was really worrying him. At least right now he had something else to do, find Catherine. He ran into her in the break room talking with Warrick.

Doing his best to give Warrick the cold shoulder as instructed, he approached her. He had little luck, Warrick trying to look mad when he wasn't really almost made him laugh.

"What's going on?" Catherine asked looking between the two of them.

"Nothing," Greg answered, fighting the smile, "Sara said you wanted to talk."

"Yeah," she said, not buying it, "just a few questions about the break in."

"I'll see you both later," Warrick said, also suppressing a smile as he left.

"Shoot." Greg said sitting at the table.

"Okay," Catherine began joining him, "the last thing you remember is what, going into the bedroom?"

"Yes," Greg started, "I'd heard a noise while I was on the couch, checked all the rooms up until then and that's the last thing I remember doing before pulling myself up off the floor."

"So you were facing the bedroom, in the doorway."

Greg thought it over for a second.

"Yes I was in the doorway, looking at the window. I told you before that I remember the window being open…"

"But the back door was shut," she interrupted.

"Yes. It was shut, or if it was open I couldn't tell. It is kind of hidden behind the dresser."

"And when you woke up, was the door open then?"

"The front door was."

"The front door?" she asked confused.

"Yeah, I woke up and saw that the front door…" Greg trailed off as it suddenly dawned on him. He'd been knocked out facing one way and woken up facing the other.

"No one mentioned the front door being open," Catherine said jotting it down in her notebook.

"I didn't think of it till now. It's the first thing I saw, it was wide open."

"That doesn't make sense," Catherine started, "the back door was open, we didn't get prints but we got tire marks in the alleyway pulling out. Your back gate was open too."

"So what, someone moved me while I was out?"

"Sounds like it. You were in the doorway when they knocked you out; you were probably in the way. We've still got your shirt. I'll see if we can pull anything off of it."

Greg nodded suddenly feeling a little more violated then he had before. The thought that someone had moved him, touched him even when he wasn't aware of it was kind of creepy.

"But," he said, "that still doesn't answer the question of why the front door was open."

"No it doesn't."

Greg and Sara decided to go to the crime scene first before going on break. They'd found a few photographs of Danielle and some unnamed man to show her parents tomorrow hoping one of them was the infamous Bobby and a few letters also referencing the mystery man. Otherwise there was nothing left to collect.

The called in that they were taking their breaks and pulled over at a nearby restaurant. At first it was quiet; they'd sat and ordered without saying much. Greg knew he had to start this, just wasn't sure how.

"I saw Dr. Jennings today."

Sara nodded. She just now remembered she was supposed to go with him, but didn't bring it up. Maybe he would.

"We, um, we talked about everything that's been going on."

"That's good," she said looking around. This was awkward. He was saying they'd talked about her and she didn't think she liked that.

"She thought that I should talk to you about some things," he finished lamely.

Sara stared at him. That should have been obvious.

"Sara," he began, despite the look he was now receiving, "I think you got the wrong idea from me about what we'd been talking about."

She continued to just stare at him. He really was feeling uncomfortable now.

"Maybe we should just talk about this later."

"No," she finally spoke, "let's do this now."

Greg took in a deep breath, now uncertain he could actually say it. She was mad still, he could feel it.

"It's not like I don't want to talk about it, it's just the whole thing is kind of sudden."

Greg mentally cursed. He was chickening out and he knew it. It was just so much easier to take if she thought he didn't want kids, then if she knew he couldn't have them. Then at least she'd be rejecting his opinions not just him.

"Well, we're talking now. I just asked you what you thought about the idea, what you wanted and you got evasive. You wouldn't even discuss it with me."

"I know."

"That's it?" she asked, "You know. What about what you think? Why aren't you answering my questions?"

"So you want to have kids before getting married?" he asked in return, knowing that it was a low blow.

"We've talked about this and you know how I feel; we don't have to be married to have a family together to have a life together."

"What if I thought we did? You wanted to wait and I was okay with that. What if I wasn't anymore?"

Greg was grasping at straws and they both knew it. They'd talked about marriage and decided to wait. They were in no hurry and they'd both agreed. He was just doing his best to avoid the real issue.

"So let's get married then if it's that important to you. Would you be willing to at least talk about it then?" she asked in return, heavy on the sarcasm. He could tell he was caught. "What would you say to kids if we were married?"

Sara stared at him, unblinking. She knew he'd been playing a game with her, seeing how committed she was to it and how far she'd be willing to go before backing down. But she wasn't backing down on this. She wasn't even sure she wanted a baby, she knew she didn't right now, Sara was just really upset that he wouldn't even talk about it with her. Had flat out refused it without explanation and it wasn't like him at all.

"Come on Greg, this is Vegas. We can go get married now if you want."

"You're not being serious," he said.

"And neither are you."

He stayed silent, just pushed his food around the plate with his fork.

"It's me isn't it?" she asked. She didn't sound bitter any more or angry. Her voice was soft. "You don't want to have this with me."

"No," he said his voice flattering some. "No, Sara this isn't…this isn't about you. Aw, man. Sara this is about me. When I said I didn't I mean I couldn't…"

Sara looked at him with uncertainty.

"I do want that. I want a family. More importantly, I want one with you. It's just not possible."

Sara didn't know if she believed it. She continued to stare at him and shook her head slightly.

"I really can't," he finished looking down again.

Neither of them said anymore, just paid the bill and left in silence. It finally struck her. Finally sunk in but knowing the truth didn't help they way she thought it would.