AN: Good news: I am no longer plagued with the flu. Bad news: I have writers block-CRY- Well this is what you get when I have writers block. My motto: When all else fails, write something else! (until you get an idea at least lol)
"Ok we've arrived at Black Ghost's latest headquarters. Everyone knows the plan?" 009 skimmed his eyes over the faces of his apprehensive teammates.
"Let's go already!" 007 grunted.
"Ok! Keep your shirt on!" 009 rolled his eyes at the impatient Englishman. The Dolphin landed in a secluded quarry of rocks, and all of the Cyborgs climbed out of the hatch door. 003 scanned the area for any hidden cameras, defensive weapons, security triggers etc.
"Careful everyone there is a sound and motion sensitive alarm underground near the entrance."
"Right." 004 ran to the side so he faced the entrance at an angle. He knelt down and set a missile at the ready. He narrowed his eyes in concentration and sent it flying. The four guards that were standing around the doorway scattered as the explosion enveloped the whole portal.
"Alright let's head in!" 009 exclaimed. He scooped up 003 and accelerated, the others running as fast as they could inside.
It was dark in the base, like every single one had been. The air was dusty too.
"Did you ever think Black Ghost might not be so stingy if he had a good house keeper and some light bulbs?" 006 wondered aloud.
"Shhhhh!" 008 warned him. They all turned to 009 for directions.
"Let's split up guys. 002, 004, and 008, you head to the left. 005, and 007 you head to the right, 006 you'll be with 003 and I." They all went quickly without question, in their told directions. 005 and 007 hurried down the right hallway, not saying a word. The passage wound on and on and on, with no doors, hatches, ladders, or anything!
"Who builds a hallway that is nothing but a….a…hallway!"
"Perhaps it is a way to make intruders lose their way."
"If that was true, my friend, then they would have put a fork in it or something. If I were an evil overlord I'd put as much in a hallway as possible so that-" CLUNK 007 staggered back, rubbing his head. He had been so preoccupied in his rant that he didn't notice that the hallway had in fact ended. "ARG! You could have told me there was a door!"
"I could, but I decided it would be more amusing this way." 007 grumbled and complained under his breath as he examined the door. It was black with one big skull in the middle, that split in half depending on which side was opened. A large sign hung on the right that read: "DO NOT DISTURB!" 007 grinned mischievously at 005.
"Shall we?" 005 shrugged and followed 007 through the portals.
The room was…fully lit! Light blazed from the ceiling, in a sharp contrast to the entrance's foyer. The two Cyborgs rubbed their eyes and blinked to adjust. The area was identical to the typical Black Ghost throne room, with the huge stair cased pedestal. A figure was reclined on the ginormous chair with both legs swung over an arm rest.
"Quick! This way!" 005 pulled 007 out from in front of the pedestal. They gazed up at the figure and realized it was Black Ghost!
"I've got a loverly bunch of coconuts! Hum dee dum dee! Standing right in a row!" 007 gaped at the singing overlord.
"What's he singing?" he whispered.
"I don't know!" Scarl soon changed to a different song, not even finishing the first.
"I'm…Dreaming of a Whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiite Christmas! Just like the ones I never knew!" He laughed uproariously and switched to yet another tune.
"I'm going to the zoo, zoo, zoo! You can come too, too, too! We're going to the zoo, zoo, zooooooooooooooooooooooooo! AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHA!"
"Is he drunk?" 007 was actually a bit worried.
"007 this story is rated G!"
"Oh yeah.." Black Ghost leaped up and reached behind his throne to grab some flowers. He tossed them around and began to frolic about, laughing giddily.
"Ohhhhhhhhhhh this is priceless." 007 pulled a camera out of nowhere and took picture after picture. BG stopped and began to spin slowly in a circle amongst the strewn flowers.
"The hills are alive! With the sound of muuuuuuuuusic!" He started to skip around.
"Mr. Pussy Snodgrass would offen' av' the ol' glass, but never when he thought anybody could see! Secretly eed' buy it and drink it on the quaet, and dream ee' was an earl with a gurl on each knee!"
"SEE! I told you he was drunk!" 007 exclaimed rather loudly. Scarl froze and stared in the direction of 007's voice.
"WHO DARES ENTER MY CHAMBERS? I was so good about the sign too…"
"Run!" 005 hissed at his friend. They scampered towards the exit as Black Ghost shot lasers at them from a gun he pulled from a holster at his side. 007 turned as he ran with the camera up to his eye.
"How about one for the fans Scarly!" BG cried angrily and shot rapidly at the roguish Cyborg. One of the shots hit the camera right in the center. "EEP! My camera! NOOOOOO!" 005 grabbed him by the neck of his uniform and drug him out of the room, down the hallway, and back at the entrance where their teammates waited.
"There was no sign of Black Ghost anywhere!" 009 said with frustration.
"He's here alright." 005 said, "But I think we should just leave him be this time…"
"What?" WHY?" 009 stared at the other with amazement.
"Um…you don't want to know." 005 Still held 007 who continued to bawl and whine.
"My camera! My blackmail! It would have been GOLD I tell you! GOOOOOOOOOOLD!"
Black Ghost slumped down on his throne and sighed heavily.
"Nobody knows…the trouble I've seen…no body knows…but meeeeeeeeeeeee!"
Yes it's stupid, yes it's silly, but I needed to write something like that for some reason.