Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
A/N I dedicate this story to alliekatgal and Sunrose Angel they inspired me to write this!
OMG OMG MY LONGEST CHAPTER EVER OF ANYTHING! NOT EVEN A ESSAY HAS BEEN THIS LONG!
Diaries of Dead and Dying Men by Draco Malfoy, also thanks to Hermione Weasley this entry: "James Potter-Malfoy-Snape"
Welcome back to the Diaries of Dead and Dying Men. I am Draco Malfoy, and today I will be telling you of my experience with pregnant men and children. I have asked Ron Weasley (surviving seer of the war)to recall some visions he has seen of my children for a little entertainment.
I hope you enjoy tonight's entry; this is a little comedy for the brewing storm of angst that will eventually follow. I know you will. Tonight however, my entry will be written a little differently. I tend to recall these memories quite clearly, so I will be doing it as if it were happening at the moment. Not as a recount of a day.
Anyways, enjoy my pain!
"ICE CREAM! I WANT ICE CREAM!" Harry Snape-Potter-Malfoy yelled at me as I did my daily ritual of jumping around the house. All to please the poor pregnant man I like to call my lover.
Now, normally, mood swings and cravings aren't too during pregnancies. Apparently, being a man and pregnant is a WHOLE different ball game! I've seen Hermione pregnant, HERMIONE GRANGER WEASLEY, and still Harry is worse! Can you believe it! He has worse mood swings than the queen of bitches! Boy aren't Severus and I lucky? (grumbles to self)
Poor Severus and I were unaware of the side affects of the pregnancy potion that Harry had volunteered to take. Oh, but mark my words, it will NOT happen again! EVER! I'm getting tired of chasing every little thing around the house to finally find it, then him not want it anymore! Not to mention, if you so much as looked at Harry wrong, he'd start to cry his eyes out! Now what kind of man is that? Crying all the time! He claims pain; I suppose I can sympathize with that. It must be very shocking to the male reproductive system to have an intruder move in…I wonder why his natural defense system didn't try to reject the child at first. Oh well, all I know is that I have a yelling husband in the living room, eight and a half months pregnant with mine and Severus' child wanting ice cream. Shit…What kind does he want! If I get it wrong he'll be upset! NO! This is torture! If I get him upset then Severus will be moody and that'll mean...NOOOO FORGIVE ME! My poor…um… pride? …Yeah, there we go, pride.
I took a wild guess at the ice cream flavor. Mint Chip Chocolate Chip…Well, he did like strange things now-a-days. I should ask him what kind, but that would infuriate him…No, don't want that…
"Here you go, lover," I said kindly as I handed the man with the swollen belly his rather large bowl of ice cream. Harry looked at me warily, then sniffed the ice cream. He glared at me and took a sample bite of the green ice cream. Then his eyes brightened.
"How did you know?" he chirped happily. Inwardly, I sighed with relief, outwards, I smiled and told him that it was no sweat…Ya, right...No sweat indeed!
Go…umm, Pride! Oh yeah, no disappointment tonight!
Harry carefully, and I mean CAREFULLY, set the ice cream on the table beside him. Then, he wiggled free of the chair. How cute he was when he tried to stand up, almost makes my heart melt like butter in an oven…almost.
Harry threw his arms around me as soon as he was balanced enough to reach me. I would have helped him, but he would have scolded me saying he didn't need any help, he was a big boy after all…
"Draco, I love you," Harry said quietly. Grrrreaaat. I know what that means.
"I love you too Harry. Is everything alright?" my mind mocked "is everything all right?" in a very very rude voice.
"I..umm…I don't know. I.." yeah yeah, here it comes.
"What is it lover?" oh! Perfect words. I swear I'm perfecting this acting thing.
"I want a back massage, but I can't get on my stomach," he said bluntly. Well, so much for beating around the bush I guess…
"Well, then finish your ice cream and I will join you in a nice relaxing bath. There I will give you a nice massage, alright?" I said slowly…Romantically in his eyes. Or that's what I gathered, as his eyes brightened, then darkened. Ohh how I loath that look. It makes me want to strip him right there and fuck his brains out! Alas, he is now eight and a-half months pregnant, no more of that fun…For now at least. Six more months to go!
Harry smiled and sat back down…out of the reach of his bowl. I handed it to him. He wolfed it down; I put it in the sink.
I had to help Harry out of his cloths. It wasn't an easy task now-a-days for some reason… After that I helped him into the tub, VERY carefully. Then I slid in behind him, again VERY carefully.
I washed his entire being and let him relax for awhile before I gave him his massage.
"Draco…" he moaned as I began to rub his back thoroughly. This was something I didn't have to hold back on, I didn't need to.
Suddenly, I smirked. Ohhh did I have an idea. I left one hand to massage his neck as the other snaked around his front. I grasped his member firmly under the water in my right hand. He was already hard from my earlier ministrations. He gasped and tensed, and just as quickly relaxed. Yes, this is what he wanted. I swear everyday my husband is becoming more and more like that old fool Dumbledore… Ah, well, it's just the Slytherin within I guess.
I slowly moved my hand up and down his long member, careful not to hit his stomach, I know from experience that that is a big turn off for Harry, something about crying and a beached whale…Iuno. He seemed to enjoy the treatment. I was rewarded with gasps of pleasure that escaped his beautiful full lips. Harry seemed to be lost between the two sweet tortures, so I decided to add another. I moved my hand on his neck a little lower, and sucked on the skin just below his hair line. He liked this. His gasps turned into soft moans and calls of my name, I had to use a vast amount of self control to keep my hand at a steady, torturous pace. After about ten minutes of this, Harry decided it was going too slow for his liking so he put his hand over mine and quickened the pace, I also quickened the pace of the massage, which had moved down to his right shoulder.
He groaned.
I decided I'd been neglected too much and abandoned the massage, matching Harry's pace.
We both came three minutes later (at a pace I couldn't have even managed in bed) screaming each others name.
"Harry, I love you," I said in between kisses on his back.
"I love you too Draco," was his reply.
XXXXX
After our bath, Harry and I decided to retire for the night. It was ten o'clock and he didn't feel like moving anymore. We laid down and teased each other with our hands. Pinching and poking and such. This started as I was facing him, playing with his left hand, kissing it and such, when he decided to pinch my cheek, after that I tickled him, thus the war of hands began.
After that he asked me to turn into my animagus form. A silver ferret…Don't ask…
He petted my soft fur, slowly. For some reason, Harry enjoyed feeling my fur while I was transformed. He could sit for hours sometimes, just staring at my fur, petting. Or even JUST starting. It fascinated him for some reason…
I cuddled up to his stomach and listened, with my enhanced hearing, to the heart beat of both him and the baby. I always enjoyed doing this, they were obviously out of rhythm, first Harry's strong yet slow one, then the weaker, yet faster one. It was literally music to my ears.
Harry giggled when he realized what I was doing.
"Hear anything Draco?" he asked kindly…Harry was such a sweet person. To this day I am horrified with myself for torturing him those seven years… I looked at him and dipped my head a few times, my version of a nod. "I miss being an owl…" was his distant response…Well, there goes Harry off into his own world…
You see, a wizard didn't choose his animagus form, the animagus form chose the wizard based on past experiences. I was destined to be a ferret (damn Moody) and Harry and owl. Surprisingly, Severus was a cat. Not any cat, a Siamese cat. We teased him at first, then we asked WTF, he refused to answer…Now how a poor guy like me got stuck with a cat and an owl I don't know…Don't cat's and owls hunt for species like mine?
Harry adored his owl form. He had always, but the liking increased when his best and oldest friend, Hedwig was killed in the cross fire of the war. It took him weeks to get over it. As soon as he did, he befriended Tom Riddle immediately, and they destroyed Voldemort together almost instantly. Who knew it'd take a Death Eater killing an owl to bring out the dark side in Harry? He was absolutely furious when the doctor told him if he valued the life of his child, no more transformations. Something about flying calmed Harry. So until he was about five months pregnant, we, Severus and I took him out for long flights on our brooms.
Of course, that was back when Severus was actually home. Recently, he had taken to coming home in the wee hours of the morning. I have become suspicious, but I refuse to say anything to Harry, that might upset him…
We enjoyed ourselves till the return of our old man.
"Lover, lover," he greeted both of us with a kiss on the forehead. He quickly undressed and then laid on the opposite side of Harry.
"Good evening," we both said with false Transylvanian accents. It had been a big joke around the house after Severus had been accused by the press of being a vampire. Severus smiled at our playfulness and inquired at what we had been doing.
So, we showed him…By tickling him. After we had our bout of fun we all calmed down and prepared for sleep.
I asked Severus what had taken so long.
"Oh, the usual," he had replied. I nodded, and returned to my task of sleeping. That is, until…
"Draco, Severus, I wanna see you fuck," came the soft husky voice of Harry. Ooooo the force of those words. Seven simple words and I was hard as a rock. Well, it had a lot to do wit the tone also. It was a husky, needy tone.
It hadn't been the first time we had gotten such a request from the poor pregnant man. Though, usually Harry didn't want anyone to get action if he couldn't. He didn't like the fact that he couldn't fuck anyone. Though, every once in a while he wanted to watch us get into it. Not often though.
And get into it we did.
XXXXX4 months laterXXXXX
"DRACO! IT'S COMING!" Harry screamed from the living room as I was drying the dishes magically. The four plates I had in the air dropped instantly, and I found myself rooted to the spot.
So soon? But he's at least two months early! Bad. Bad. Bad, Very bad!
"DRACO!"
My legs suddenly could move again. With reflexes only gifted to a seasoned seeker, I turned swiftly towards the living room and swept the man in labor in my arms, no questions asked.
Contacting Severus wasn't even NEAR anything I was thinking at the moment. Harry. Hospital. Harry. Mungo's. Harry! Baby. Nothing so complex as "get Severus" So I ran to the fireplace near the east window, a good thirty feet, grabbed a large handful of floo powder, and yelled "St. Mungo's Maternity Ward!" and stepped through the flames.
I was there instantly. The place had a no-trip spell over the fire place, so I didn't drop my load. I ran towards the front desk.
"Baby. Early. Two months," I must have been very, very pale…
"Name?"
"Draco Malfoy."
"Not yours, his!"
"Harry Malfoy-Snape"
"Where is the Snape?"
"…Dunno."
"Noted. Place him in that room over there, we will be with you shortly."
Harry, who had been so good throughout the entire "conversation" suddenly let out a strangled cry, which drew attention from the others in the room.
"..Harry Potter?" someone whispered.
"No, no, it's Malfoy-Snape now. Remember, he married the Death Eaters."
"Death Eaters!"
"Well, they claim to have been spy's."
"DRACO! FOR MERLIN'S SAKE MOVE!" Harry screamed. Oh. I snapped back to reality and moved into the room. Quickly and swiftly depositing the man on the bed in the middle of the room. Harry was whimpering and clenching and un-clenching his hands.
"Sir, you are required to have an antiseptic spell if you are going to stay for this," a nurse told me. I nodded and muttered the spell quietly. She handed me a wet towel. I had NO clue what to do with it…But, there were those muggle movies Harry made me watch where the father sponged the mothers head during the labor, so I tried that with my left hand, and let him grab my right.
"Sir, does he have the full process preparation, or do I have to get a surgeon?" Uhh, huh? She noticed my confusion…Muggle terms anyway. "Does he have a temporary birth canal?" she asked. Oh, yeah! Severus mentioned something about that…but I forgot.
"Yes, yes he does," came a voice from the door. Severus Snape peeled off the heavy teaching robe from his shoulders, and rolled up his sleeves.
"Oh, alright. You are?"
"The father."
"And he is?"
"The other father."
"…Oh…" Severus dismissed the idiotic medic and turned to his young lover.
"Harry, how is it?" he asked quietly. The medic gasped. Sooo, she remembered WHO the man sweating like a whore in Sunday school was eh? And who he was married to too. Idiot.
"How the fuck do you think it is Severus! It hurts like a sonofabitch," was his strangled reply. I think he was going through a contraction… Severus smiled faintly and grabbed his other hand. He began to slowly massage it. Harry relaxed after a while. A half hour after that, it began again.
The contractions got closer and closer together, until he Healer informed Harry that it was time to push…He didn't seem to happy with the idea…
"YOU FUCKING BASTARD SEVERUS! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU AND THAT MOTHER FUCKING POTION!" phew, not me.
"DRACO! HOLY SHIT I SWEAR I'M UTTING YOUR DICK OFF TOMORROW!" (gulp)
"DAMN BASTARDS, I WILL NEVER SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN!" really now. Is that necessary? Harry continued with his string of insults and curses at us that made ME blush. After he ran out of things to call us he began to tell us exactly what he was going to do to us after he was out of there…Severus seemed amused, I was..uhh.. a little pale to put it nicely…alright, alright. My balls attempted to crawl into my skin, that's how scared I was. Not only because of what Harry was saying, but because it was just hitting me that I was going to be a father…
"MOTHER FUCKER!" then crying. Crying? BABY! ALREADY! OMG OMG WHAT DO I DO? I think I was hyper ventilating, Severus put his hand on my shoulder, making me jump, yet calming me down.
Harry was breathing like he'd ran twenty miles in six minutes. When did that happen? He grabbed the back of my head, making my yelp. Hey, those vile things he was saying are still fresh in my mind! Then he pulled my forehead to his. He the grabbed Severus' head and pulled it to the side of his head, we stayed like that for a few minutes.
"I love you guys," Harry whispered. LOVE? WHAT THE HELL IS THIS SHIT? FIRST HE GOES ON ABOUT CASRATION, NOW HE LOVES ME? GRRRR! MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
"We love you too Harry," I replied softly…stupid instincts. I should be giving him the cod shoulder right now… Severus agreed with my spoken statement.
Suddenly, the baby's cries brought me back to reality. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I was a dad. MY baby was now in the arms of Severus. OUR baby, the baby WE made out of sheer love. This baby is the result of a night spent riding hormones! How? How is this possible? This living, breathing creature came from my…From Harry's…And a potion?
THAT, was too hard to swallow. I fainted.
I was revived hours later. Harry was nursing the…no, OUR child. Such a sight. I sighed. Never in a million years did I think that I'd be high on life watching the boy-who-wouldn't-die breast feed our son. Wait. Breast feed? Son? Where did that come from? Wait, breast feed yes, Severus gave him a potion for that too, but son?
"Is it…" started.
"A boy," Harry answered with a huge grin. I smiled gaily and quickly stood
(whoa, head rush)
up to look at m-my son. My son.
I almost fainted…He was soo beautiful! Well, as beautiful as a red skinned hairless boy could be. He was quietly sucking on his "mothers" nipple while Harry and Severus (and I of course) stared attentively at him. After he got his fill he looked up...
…to notice that three faces were looking right back. He seemed shocked at the many…things that were looking at him. Two of them on each round thing. Two were green, two were grey, and two were black. Curious…
He reached his tiny hand (which had previously occupied his "mothers" "breast" and reached towards the thing with the grey things. The grey one's things below the grey things below the holed thing quivered at the attention. The baby was fascinated with the things below the grey things below the holed thing. They were pink! Mommy's feeding thing was pink!
The one with gray leaned down and touched the pink things onto the baby's forehead. Then he signed in contentment.
The baby gurgled happily and grabbed the pink things, bringing them to his mouth. Nope, no milk there. After some prying from Harry's hand, Draco was returned his lip. He used them to smile.
Severus remained unusually quiet as all this happened. He smiled. But made no offer to hold the baby. Hmmm.
Harry gasped in delight as the child grabbed his finger and sucked on it. We stayed like that for hours. Each taking turns letting the child grab something that was in his reach (including hair) until he fell asleep, then we took turns petting him. Neither me nor Severus slept that night…Which was probably a silly thing to do since we'd need all the sleep we could get…When the child awoke for food, we'd silently guide his mouth to Harry's nipple and watch him feed, then go right back to sleep. Such a wonderful day.
So, when's the next one coming?
XXXXX
Now that you've heard my heart touching story of the beautiful baby boy, I will hand the reigns over to Hermione who will tell you of the things she has Seen of the three beautiful children. Hermione? (hands over quill)
Thank you Draco, now, we'll start with how I stumbled across those visions, this will be written in the style of the previous entry. As if it were happening right at the moment.
"Oi, Mione, look at him!" Ron exclaimed. I turned.
"OH MY GOSH! HE IS ADORABLE!" I yelled and ran to the nursing child. He wasn't too happy about being ripped from his "mommy's" nipple. I smiled.
After the baby finished feeding (Harry's influence) I held him. Suddenly. I froze. An icy sensation crept up my body as the familiar feeling of a vision forced itself upon me. I held the baby tight to me so I wouldn't drop him.
A girl with black eyes in the arms of Draco as he lies on an infirmary bed.
Harry and Severus holding two identical boys with green eyes in the back of a train. The Hogwarts Express.
A girl in the arms of Severus, a triumphant look on his face…She had black eyes. Red Hair.
Draco and five children standing before two gravestones. All crying.
A lone child standing before three gravestones, an old diary in his hand. Crying uncontrollably.
A boy at his first day of Hogwarts.
Boy's first girlfriend.
A girl at her first day of Hogwarts.
Girl's first boyfriend.
Twins at their first day of Hogwarts.
Girls? Ewww.
A girl at her first day of Hogwarts.
Lonely. Pain.
The first boy, the oldest. A girl with him. Kissing.
Twins, causing mischief.
A girl with black eyes and red hair, sitting at the back of the room alone while her siblings played with their gifts at Christmas. She didn't get any gifts. She never got gifts.
The same girl…Georgia, fifteen, celebrating her birthday with a snake. Talking to the snake.
The other siblings, playing chess and badminton, Georgina playing with a razorblade.
Hospital. Blood. Too far, so much Blood.
A girl, red hair, black eyes. Having a child, alone. A boy, black eyes and read hair. "Avada Kedavra!"
Goodbye boy.
Four siblings, three with black hair, one with blonde, battling the red head. The red head…Dark Mark, Dark Lady. Massacre, so many dead. River of blood, mountains of bodies. A single tear falls from her eyes before she destroys all four of the now adults. They did it. They made her hurt. They caused the wounds. It's all their fault.
A man. Red eyes, pale. Tom Riddle; takes his place beside his lover. And hugs her. He laughs.
I jolted back into reality with a shocked look on my face. Why? What happened? Why was she…It was their fault. They cold-shouldered her. But why? Betrayal. Not her, not until they…Until the boy..HIM.
I swore to myself that day that I would not let that happen. Ever.
But Draco. Harry. Severus…What happened?
I silently handed the child back to Harry, who gratefully took him back, knowing from experience how I tended to drop thing when this happened.
It was then I made the biggest mistake of my life; It was then that I kept silent.
XXXXX
A/n
Courtney: Everyone meet Lucius, he's my muse! He found me last night. Alliekatgal guided him to me! Say "Hi" Lucius!
Lucius: Umm..err… Hi Lucius?
Courtney: Ha-ha, see? He's nervous, (doesn't get out much…I KEEP HIM CHAINED TO A BED MUHAHAHAHAH…Cough cough…Now where did THAT come from?)
Lucius: …hi Lucius?
Courtney: Right… was it a long chapter people? Tell me! I LOVE reviews! (and reviewers! No chains, I promise…Or beds for that matter…)
Lucius: yeah, she likes it when you review! I watch her jump up and down and cry when she gets like four reviews in a day, it's very entertaining actually! So, please, if only for my entertainment values, REVIEW!
Courtney: I DO NOT CRY (…alright…maybe just a little) who asked YOU anyway?
Lucius: …hi Lucius? (Laughs nervously)
Courtney: Anyways… Any questions? ASK! Either review or contact me at blackrosewhitemage at I'll reply ASAP and unless you're on a completely different time zone than me, ASAP means within like 5- 7 hours (at most)…And OMG I AM SO HYPER RIGHT NOW! GO RAW RAMEN! WHOOO
…anywayz
Choose between these three for next chapter!
Tom Riddle vs. Voldemort; can he be real? (sum: Tom Riddle steps up to the plate and helps destroy Voldemort, then has to prove himself worthy of trust)
The Fate of Lovers; is it worth is? (sum: Dumbledore's sacrifice, also Ginny's demise)
Hermione's Dilemma; Mudblood or Seer? (sum: Hermione and how she found out exactly WHAT she is)
Love ya'll,
Courtney S.