By myself but not Alone
Follow the God that failed
Disclaimer: I don't own final fantasy 8.
This fic starts off a couple of months after the game. Rinoa wasn't there, instead her mother lived but she's now dead. Rinoa's gone to go stay with her father at Balamb Garden who is investigating the attempted assassination on President Vincent Deling's life. The assassination that also killed Rinoa's mother and left Rinoa all alone.
Rinoa Heartilly approaches the building apprehensively, she's somewhat nervous about this. Its not the fact that the building itself is intimidating, or the fact that there's a group of blood soaked people coming in her general direction… its just that today's the big day. Today's the day she meets her father for the first time in her entire life.
While Rinoa was inside her mother's stomach her father had abandoned her. Her mother had always said that he couldn't face up the responsibility of being a father. For some reason Rinoa saw that as a cover up. The man was a general, all they do is follow up on there responsibilities.
As she thought of her mother tears began to well up in her eyes. Her mother was the reason she was here, well her lack of mother we shall say. She'd been killed by a mercenary sent to assassinate President Vincent Deling. Her mother had been the presidents sectary, which was strange, she'd always strongly apposed war of any kind and here she was getting pregnant to a general and working for one of the more blood thirsty beings in the history of the planet.
The thoughts were pushed out of her mind as the bloody people began to get quite close. They didn't look terribly dangerous; in fact they looked like teenagers. Rinoa assumed that they were students at Balamb Garden, her destination.
Her father had been sent to personally see to the Garden after the assassination attempt. It was obvious that one of the Gardens was responsible, but to attack all three Gardens was to provoke a war on Galbadia that Vincent Deling would surely loose.
"Excuse me, are you lost?"
Rinoa turned to see a brunette standing behind her that radiated. Even if her clothes were ripped, her hair was a mess and blood had stained various parts of her canary yellow mini dress.
Rinoa stared at the girl for a second, she was quite petite, and not exactly what she'd expected to be in one of the Gardens. Other than her dress she wore a pair of brown boots that came just under her knee. She had shimmering green eyes that were her main feature. Her brown hair flipped out at the bottoms and she had a fringe that nearly covered her eyes.
"Yeah, a little." Rinoa replied.
The girl grinned, she was kinda startling. She looked as though her appearance at this present time wasn't bothering her.
"Don't worry, I'll show you where ever you need to go. I remember when I first came her I was sooooo scared!" the girl continued.
She grabbed Rinoa's elbow and started leading her inside the large gates of Balamb Garden.
"By the way, my names Selphie." She said as she continued pulling Rinoa along.
"Rinoa."
Selphie seemed somewhat shocked at the statement, but she didn't show it for long. She quietened down after that.
"So I spose you're looking for the general…" Selphie trailed off.
Rinoa nodded her head and wondered what was wrong with Selphie now.
After awhile of thinking it dawned on Rinoa why Selphie seemed a little disturbed by this new information. Rinoa was the daughter of the guy that was trying to prove that Balamb was responsible for the near death of the dictator of Galbadia. That made Rinoa a spy.
Rinoa sighed; this wasn't going to be the most comfortable place she'd ever stayed. Little did she know that she was going to find herself right at home.
Rinoa waved at Selphie as she entered the elevator up to the top floor.
She took the moment in the elevator as a chance to regroup her thoughts. She was both confused and scared. Her father had had nothing to do with her since her birth yet as soon as her mother had died he had offered to take her without question. But upon her arrival no one had been there to pick her up from the train station, no one had met her at the gate outside Garden and it appeared as though Selphie had no idea whether he was actually here or not.
The soft sounding music calmed her a little. If it not for the abrupt stop on the second floor. She was startled out of her trance to the doors opening and a devishly attractive man entering. Not that she was staring or anything.
"You going up?" Rinoa asked as he entered.
He nodded his head, not bothering to look at her.
Rinoa took it in her stride, thinking that maybe he was shy or something, never thinking he was the ignorant person that he'd turn out to be.
The doors began to close slowly and Rinoa couldn't help but glance over at the man standing beside her. He was beautiful, in a masculine way of course!
He had a deep scar running between his blue/grey eyes, it made him look slightly dangerous and Rinoa found herself thinking about what a tragedy it really was. It took some of the attention away from his eyes, they were striking, and she found herself longing for him to stare at her.
"SQUALL!"
The boy beside her winced, she could see him visibly shudder for a second then reluctantly hold the door open.
A blonde haired boy ran inside the doors. He smiled apologetically at Rinoa who waved the mere hold up off. It really didn't bother her to not see her father for another couple of seconds.
He turned to face the other boy in the elevator and Rinoa had to hold herself back from gasping. He had a black tattoo that swirled down the left side of his face. She hadn't noticed it when he first entered but now it was clear as day.
"Squall, Quistis is looking for you and she is not happy!" the blonde boy panted.
The other boy, obviously called Squall, nodded his head once again.
"You don't understand, man! She is really pissed at you this time." The boy stated.
The doors closed behind him and Rinoa tried to ignore the conversation. It wasn't in her nature to pry into other people's business.
"Quistis is going to have to understand the need for budgetary cuts. Field trips and things of that nature are expensive and unfortunately we hold liability if one of our students should be injured in any way." Squall said in a robot sounding voice.
Zell rolled his eyes and turned to face the doors. As he did so they opened and Rinoa exited the elevator quickly.
Rinoa felt relief wash over her as she walked towards the wooden double doors that led to the principal's office. This was it, the moment she'd waited her entire life for. She was finally going to have a father…
"Excuse me, Miss?"
Rinoa turned to see a sectary sitting behind a desk staring at her expectantly.
"Uhhh, yeah?" Rinoa replied, unsure about proper protocol in this place.
After hearing that Squall guy talking Rinoa got the distinct impression that her type of language wasn't going to be accepted.
"Do you have an appointment?" the woman asked.
"No but I'm General Caraway's daughter… I'm looking for my father." Rinoa answered.
"Oh Miss Caraway, I'm sorry but your father isn't in there. But go right ahead, I'm sure the Principal will be more than happy to set you in the right direction."
"Heartilly." Rinoa cut in.
"Sorry?"
"My last name, its not Caraway, its Heartilly."
After Rinoa had finished talking to the receptionist she opened the doors to reveal and very formal looking room. There was a middle-aged man sitting behind a wooden desk with a large window behind him. It had a view of the entire Garden, then the plains finally ending at the ocean that met Balamb borders.
Talking to him was Squall from the elevator.
She knocked lightly on the door as she opened it wider earning Squall and the principal's attention.
"I'm sorry… Sir… but I'm just looking for General Caraway…" Rinoa trailed off.
She felt so out of place. Everything in this place was so formal, she felt fine when she was in the main lobby but now everything had turned military styles. Rinoa had nearly forgotten that this place was used to train highly skilled killing machines.
"Ah, Rinoa Heartilly. I've been looking forward to when you got here. I'd like to introduce you to Squall, he's Balamb Gardens commander, second in command under me."
Rinoa was slightly shocked by this new revelation, he didn't look any older than 18!
She didn't understand how anyone could get such a high rank at such a young age, and how was it that the other students would respect someone so young! Wouldn't they just walk all over him?
"Hello." Rinoa said politely.
"I'm just in the middle of something at the moment, make yourself at home and I'll be with your shortly."
Squall turned from Rinoa back to the Principal. He had a stern look on his face and had obviously been complaining about something before Rinoa came in.
Not letting Rinoa's presence stop him, he continued.
"How can I be expected to train future SeeD's when I'm not allowed admittance into the training centre?" Squall barked.
Rinoa watched the Principal flinch, for some reason Rinoa didn't really think that he was in charge most of the time.
"I'm sorry Squall but there were investigations in there today. Beside's you haven't trained any students in there to date. In fact I was unaware that your duties even involved training anyone."
Squall falter for less than a second. He was back on his toes immediately and sending out another assault.
"I already have teachers hounding me about the cuts I've had to make. Ever since Norg stopped funding us the Garden has gone broke. We need to take on more missions otherwise Garden is going to go bankrupt."
"Squall you know as well as I do that that is impossible. Especially with special assignments such as the ones we have been getting recently. Garden will be fine, it always is."
"Be that as it may I believe that without another form of financial funding sooner or later Garden will be no more." Squall concluded.
The principal pondered the thought for awhile, he swirled his chair away from Squall and out towards the view that accompanied his office. The principal stood and walked towards the glass, staring distantly out over the courtyard.
"Off the record," the principal began, "what is your reason for being so passionate about this Squall?"
For the second time today Rinoa saw Squall hesitate before answering. He glanced over his shoulder at Rinoa, who pretended to be too enthralled with a painting on the wall to pay any attention to the conversation taking place.
"… Because I know what its like to have nowhere else to go, Sir." Squall whispered.
Rinoa strained her ears as much as she could but resigned herself to the fact that she wasn't going to hear whatever Squall had said. She sighed and actually began to take note of her surroundings.
Principal Cid nodded and with a wave of his hand signalled for Squall to take a seat.
"Rinoa, please come here." Cid said enthusiastically.
Rinoa stood and slowly made her way towards the polished desk.
She tugged at her nave blue velvet miniskirt as she did so. She glanced down at her attire, suddenly feeling very self-conscious.
She wore a light blue cord coat with no sleeves that was done up at the front with one tie in front of her bosom. A black body suit under that which also had no sleeves and ended about mid thigh. Over that was her velvet mini skirt with several buttons going up the front. She had separate sleeves that came from her wrists to her elbows and was the same corded material and colour as her coat. On her feet she had a pair of black combat boots and a black tie was around her upper left arm.
As per usual she'd left her hair out, not feeling comfortable with it down.
Cid smiled warmly at her and it put Rinoa at ease a little, she still felt as though she had a certain person that she had to be around these people.
"Rinoa, while you're here I would like you to feel as comfortable as possible. You father wont be here for another week, there was a mix up with the time your were given to come here. General Caraway will be notified that you are already here and I will make sure that you are given a living quarters immediately."
"But I thought I heard you say that there were an investigation in some centre… isn't Caraway doing the investigations?" Rinoa asked softly.
"Well your half right, the General is just overseeing the investigation. His part isn't that crucial but nonetheless he has to be here. Hence why he chose to come a couple of weeks after the investigation had started."
Rinoa still didn't really understand but all she was getting out of this conversation was more questions, she opted to just stick to less confusing topics.
"So, where will I be staying?"
Cid looked quite pleased with the question, he looked as though he was the sort of man who usually had the answers and she was asking questions to which it was anyone's guess what the answers were.
"Well I will get Squall to see to that personally. It will more than likely be on the second floor with all the other VIP living quarters."
Rinoa nodded in response, no longer wishing to ask questions of this nature. She just wanted to sleep. She'd had a very traumatic week and all she wanted was a good night's sleep.
'Keep a stiff upper lip.' The words kept ringing through her head. It was something her mother had always told her when she was upset. She wasn't going to let these strangers see her cry, which was why she wanted to get to her room and quickly.
"Well I suppose you're exhausted from your trip. I'll get Squall to get your room now."
RINOA'S POV.
I glanced over at my companion, he seems nice enough, well actually that's a lie. He looks as though my presence is more than a little burden.
As much as I try to make conversation he just keeps ignoring me.
"So do you like it here?" I ask, hopeful that I'll get more than a one word sentence from him.
"It's a very respectable establishment."
Ok can you say ROBOT? Something something something Mr Roboto!
I giggle slightly, the song ringing through my head; Squall gives me an awkward look but doesn't say anything.
I choose to ignore it, not wanting to cause friction between the COMMANDER. That concept baffles me.
"So how is it that you became commander at such a young age?" I ask still holding onto hope.
"I was thrust into this position; I didn't have much of a choice in the matter." Squall replies.
As he says this I can see the girl from earlier running towards us. What was her name again? Sarah… Nancy… no it definitely wasn't Nancy.
"Squall!" she squeals enthusiastically.
Squall seems to shudder slightly, but his demeanour softens slightly.
'Maybe that's his girlfriend…'
"Yes Selphie?" he says impatiently.
"Well…" Selphie begins biting her nails and staring at Squall with the best puppy dog eyes I've ever seen in my long existence. "Y'know how the concerts tonight…"
"Don't expect me to preform!" Squall exclaims before Selphie can finish.
Selphie rolls her eyes and crosses her arms; she lets out an annoyed sigh.
"No dummy1 I already have all the performers that are needed. I was just wondering, seeing as everyone looks up to you and stuff if you could make a speech or something."
"No." Squall replies bluntly.
"Ow but Squally! C'mon! It won't kill you and I'll put in a good word with Quistis for you!"
Selphie begins a rant that is so fast I find it hard to keep up with what she's actually saying. Squall seems to be staring at her with the same blank expression he's had for the entire duration of our walk. I can tell he isn't really listening.
"Fine, but only a short speech. I'll do it at the start before everyone's drunk."
"Alcohol… ow Squall you know we're more responsible than that…" Selphie says cheekily.
Squall rolls his eyes and pushes her aside as he begins walking again. He signals for me to follow, which I might add I think is really rude.
"Oh, hey Rinny." Selphie exclaims.
I'm kinda taken aback by her sudden nickname for me. I've known her for little more than ten minutes!
"Hi Selphie." I reply.
I'm kinda glad that my presence was even acknowledged.
"Selphie I would be eternally grateful if you would cut this conversation short. I have a duty to preform and unfortunately about a million after that." Squall cuts in, he seems kinda pissed off.
"Oh shut up Squall!" Selphie snarls.
"Unless you want the disciplinary committee to be notified of your blatant disrespect for Garden faculty I would advise you don't say that again!"
Selphie glares at Squall; I didn't think that someone so sweet could produce such an earth shattering glare.
"And if you don't want people to know about your little 'vision' then I suggest you SHUT UP!"
Squall finally shows me to my room, its quite fancy but nothing really that special. I'm used to better I should say.
"Thanks." I say as Squall slams the door.
'What a freak…'
I can see my bed through an open door to the left and I'm standing in what looks like the lounge. Connected to it's the kitchen and a bathroom can be seen on the other side of the room.
'Wow… this is complicated…' I think sarcastically.
If this is the good rooms I dread to think what everyone else has to sleep in.
I can see my stuff has been delivered here already, I was actually quite curious as to what happened to that.
Finally having enough of this depressing room I decide to give myself a tour of Garden.
NORMAL POV.
The blonde haired woman walked with purpose towards her destination. Her destination being the tall, dark haired man at the end of the corridor. He's got some girl with him, but soon she's showed into a room and he leaves her side.
All that can be heard in the hallway is the clinking of her boots and the mindless chatter of students.
Her reflection in the spotless windows beside her shows a beautiful woman. One that demands respect by her very aura.
She wore a peach colours sleeveless zip up shirt that was open at the bottom to reveal her toned stomach. A skirt of the same colour that went just below her knees. Around her hips she had various belts, one large brown one with a silver buckle that sloped down, another brown one around her waist with two chains hanging off it, they were at either side of her body and curved down at exactly the same length. She had black boots on that were impossible to tell how high they went up due to the fact that her skirt covered that. She had separate sleeves that were a dark crimson colour that started at her shoulder and went down to her wrists, covering her hands were a pair of black leather gloves.
Her blonde hair was done up at the back with two large bangs framing around her face.
She had a pair of the iciest blue eyes known to man, ones that seemed to dare people to fuck with her.
"Leonhart!" she screamed.
The boy in question turned to face her; he folded his arms over his chest and held his chin up high. Readying himself for a verbal assault.
"How dare you!" she snarled.
Her name was Quistis Trepe, one of the more formidable foes at Garden.
"Listen Quistis I know that your upset…"
"No Squall, you ave no idea! There are about a million other budgets that could've been cut but you insisted on cutting field trips! I don't think you understand the importance of our students to venture into the outside world! Do not think that this is going to happen Squall Leonhart, I'll die first!" Quistis screamed.
She'd earnt them both the attention of most of the students and SeeD's.
"Quistis, your making a scene." Squall whispered.
"Well I think a scene needs to be made Squall!"
"NO MATTER WHAT WE CUT SOMEONE'S BOUND TO BE UPSET!" Squall yelled, finally loosing his cool.
"WELL CUT SOMETHING THAT WE DON'T NEED!"
"MAYBE I SHOULD JUST CUT YOU!" Squall exclaimed.
"Is that a threat Leonhart, because I will kick your ass!" Quistis snarled.
Squall took a deep breath and shut his eyes. He began massaging his temple and he lifted his head up to the ceiling.
"No Quistis, I'm sorry."
"Squall, how can you justify cutting anything when your funding a concert tonight?" Quistis sighed.
Squall mulled over this for awhile, choosing his words very carefully. He knew that Quistis was smarter than he was and this argument wasn't going to be won by him. But he was a skilled negotiator, and he knew that negotiations weren't Quistis's forte.
"Alright Quistis, I'll budge. You can have your field trips, but they must be ok'd by me, and if they aren't and you choose to go anyway your own salary will be the one to pay the price."
"Done."
Rinoa walked solemnly around the crowded halls of Garden. Her mind wasn't on the tour at hand, more on her current situation. Her emotions seemed to be held left a crumbled mess that she could piece back together. Her main thought, the missing part in her life. The part that had been perfect before and in one instant smashed across her feet. No words could consol her but she refused to cry. Crying wouldn't help anything, not that she believed that. Her main reason for not crying was that she wanted to focus on the life she had ahead of her. One that mainly consisted at this present time in Garden.
She saw many different people on her tour. They all seemed to hang out together whatever there personalities may be. In the infirmary she found a Dr, who addressed herself as Dr Kadowaki. She informed Rinoa that should she be suffering in any way that she was the one to talk to. After that she found the Quad. Or whatever the hell it was called. In there she found Selphie again, apparently working on a concert, something she'd been hearing about repeatability since she'd got here.
"Rinny!" Selphie exclaimed as Rinoa approached.
"Hi Selphie." Rinoa replied.
She stared in awe at the natural beauty of the Quad. She didn't see many students in here and was quite surprised about that. This place was so peaceful; she thought she'd spend a lot of time here.
"What are you doing here?" Selphie asked as she walked towards Rinoa.
She began wiping her hands on the bottom of her dress, leaving a stain.
'How many yellow dresses does this girl own… ?'
"I was just taking a look around. Whats going on here?" Rinoa asked.
Selphie glanced behind her shoulder and a look of pride covered her features. She seemed to beam at her work for a second before turning back to Rinoa.
"This is where the concerts going to be held. It's a celebration to commemorate a high priority mission that was completed a couple of days ago. We always put something on when something important happens. Principal Cid has no problem with us partying because he says that we'll all go insane if our lives revolve around death…" Selphie trailed off at the end.
Rinoa was taken aback by how blunt Selphie was about it. And she seemed to be so optimistic the entire time she was saying her speech.
"That's… nice." Rinoa replied, unsure about how she was supposed to answer.
"Yeah…" there was an odd silence for a couple of seconds, but it was interrupted without fail, by Selphie. "You wanna meet my boyfriend?"
Rinoa rose her eyebrows and shrugged her shoulders.
"Sure."
"Wicked, he'll be down here soon."
Selphie turned and went back to her work; Rinoa decided that the polite thing would be to help her.
"So can I help?" Rinoa enquired as she walked behind Selphie.
"Uhhh… there really isn't that much more to do, we had a lot of help earlier on in the project."
Rinoa nodded and took a seat on a barrel that lay flat on the ground.
Seconds later she saw a tall young man approaching Selphie. He was an interesting looking fellow but he oozed sex appeal. Rinoa even found herself nearly falling under his trance.
He wore a black leather cowboy hat with his hair tied in a pony tail out the back. A pair of tan chaps on his legs with black boots. A blue vest looking shirt and a tan fur lined coat over top. His hands were covered in black leather fingerless cloves and he had an Indian looking necklace around his neck.
He wrapped his long around Selphie's slim waist and started whispering in her ear.
"Y'know Selph, you're a rose and I'm a little thorny."
Selphie giggled but pushed him away.
"Irvy! We've got company!" Selphie exclaimed.
He glanced over at Rinoa, and then did a double take.
"My lady." Irvine said as he walked towards her.
"Hello." Rinoa said with a smile.
He shook her hand but lingered there for more than Rinoa would've considered polite.
"Irvine! Control yourself!" Selphie snapped.
Rinoa stood and politely excused herself; she felt that she'd lingered in the Quad for too long.
As she exited the long corridor that led out to the rest of Garden, she thought she heard a familiar voice. She searched through the masses of students, hoping that her instincts were right. He was here. She knew that he went to one of the Gardens and had prayed that it had been this one.
'Please be you!'
She spotted his trade mark whisked back blonde hair and knew. She knew in her heart that it was him.
"Seifer?" she said quietly from behind him.
He spun around, seeming somewhat annoyed that someone would bother him at all. His face turned to that of shock when he saw her. Then his features softened considerably.
"Rinoa…"
Ow. Don't worry; this is a traditional Squall Rinoa thing. Seifer's got his own business going on. Squall's still an asshole, but considerably not as bad as he was. It's just that without Rinoa's presence during the game kept him kinda the same way he was. And I think he's cool when he's a prick.
Read and Review.
P.s. this is a quite a long chapter for me…