Elizabeth heard his voice in the living room as she closed the kitchen door behind her. It wasn't the loud, booming voice in which he often greeted her, nor the softer, sweeter one he used with Ella, but rather a low and serious tone that he rarely used at home. What was going on?

"Roses, white." she heard him say. "She liked the fragrant ones." Elizabeth walked quietly on the thick carpet until she was standing behind him. He had heard the rustle of her skirt and leaned back a little so that his head rested against her hip as he finished the call, his eyes closed, nodding in agreement at whatever was being said. "Yes. No, I'll take care of that myself tomorrow. Thank you."

He hung up the phone and set it down on the coffee table but didn't turn around. Elizabeth had to circle the arm of the couch and sit down to face him. His eyes were bloodshot and his mouth was turned down at the corners.

"Robert?" she asked. "Are you alright?"

He nodded and reached out his arm to her. She turned so that she could lean back against him, tucking her head under his chin, the thunder of his heart beating against her back. He was quiet for a minute and then whispered. "Ella's upstairs, still napping." After that he just held her tightly to him, and she felt him swallow, unable to say anymore.

She turned in his arms, still pressed against him, now facing him. His lips were trembling and she stilled them by pressing a long kiss against them. "Robert. Love. You can tell me. Please tell me," she murmured, stroking his cheek.

"My mother died. This morning." his voice was hollow and echoey, as if there was no conviction behind the words.

"Oh, Robert," she answered, hugging him tightly to her, "why didn't you call me?" she asked, whispering into his ear.

"I didn't know what to do," he mumbled back, "So many calls to make. She had five husbands. Four still alive. Nobody can come. Just me."

Elizabeth breathed deeply. She still wasn't used to this voice. She was still a little scared at seeing him so quiet. She kissed his cheek and smiled reassuringly, "But I'm here. I'll help you. You know that don't you?"

Robert finally seemed to wake up, shake his head quickly. He stood then and straightened. "I'm fine. Really. It's all done now. I mean, for God's sake, she hasn't known me for the last three years. Every week, she'd look right through me. Why should I miss her now?" And realizing that he wasn't as steady as he thought, Robert leaned sideways against the back of the sofa, Elizabeth staring up at him.

A noise made them both turn. Ella was scooting down the stairs on her bum, carefully clinging to a piece of blue construction paper in one hand while pushing herself down with the other.

"Hey!" Elizabeth sprung up to get her. But when she got to the middle of the stairs she realized that she probably shouldn't lift her, so she turned to Robert, "Can I get some help here?" Robert smiled, went to get Ella and brought her to the bottom of the staircase and set her down. He sighed and turned as if to go back to the sofa or the phone, but Ella grabbed his hand, "Robuht!" she protested.

He smiled and kneeled. "What's up, buttercup?" he murmured stroking her blond bangs out of her eyes and tucking her hair behind her little ear.

"Picture for you!"

"Oh!" he said and took the paper from her and examined it carefully. It was a drawing of two people, one with her arms around the shoulders of the other.

Elizabeth sat down on the bottom step and peered over. "Who are the people, sweetie?"

"Me," she explained pointing to the smaller one whose arms encircled the other. "And Robuht. I'm hugging him."

Robert's eyes filled with tears all of the sudden and he turned his face away a bit to wipe them. "What about doing that now? For real?" Elizabeth encouraged. But Ella waited quietly for Robert to turn back to her.

"Okay?" asked Ella. Robert nodded and she stood up on her toes to circle his neck with her arms.

"Hmmm!" Robert sighed, his eyes closed, burying his nose into Ella's sweet-smelling hair and hugging her to him. Elizabeth couldn't resist and kneeled to join them. Robert looked up and met her eyes. He smiled. "You two," he shook his head as if confounded. He kissed Elizabeth on the lips and then Ella on the forehead, stood up taking the toddler in his arms and trotted her into the kitchen.

That night in bed, Elizabeth waited for Robert to brush his teeth and slide in beside her. She put down the morning newspaper and looked at him, but he just picked up a journal as if he was going to read. "Robert!" she exclaimed impatiently. "What?" he mocked her tone exactly. "Could you tell me what's going on? What you're feeling? Do I have to draw you a picture of the two of us talking for it to happen?" Robert smiled at her exasperation and scooted over to snuggle her. He sighed and began to speak in yet another of his voices, the one that confided his most private thoughts to Elizabeth.

"She's really gone. And I won't be able to tell her, 'Mother, this is the woman I love.' or 'I'm a father now.' " He paused. "Not that I haven't told her about you. Every week for the last three years. Funny. She's a better listener now that she has no idea what I'm talking about. She used to be such a conversationalist. The wittiest woman at her parties. She made all the men fall in love with her. And I still don't know if she ever loved anyone but herself…."

He rubbed his eyes, tired from the long day, the long explanation that was still not one, and rolled on his side to look at Elizabeth. "Can we maybe talk about this tomorrow?"

She stroked his head with her hand and kissed his forehead gently then tilted her face down to kiss him on the lips. "Of course we can." She paused. "And the funeral?"

"Tomorrow at noon. Graveside. I'll be okay. You go to work."

"Robert!" she objected.

"Honestly," he said, looking steadily into her eyes. "I want to say goodbye alone. I actually have a lot to say. I'll call you after though, if you want."

Elizabeth was exasperated but let him think he'd won, planning to duck out of surgery tomorrow and be there for him at the service. She turned out the lamp and curled up against him, holding his hand in hers, letting him know that she was there.

The next day though, a laboratory explosion at a local high school trapped her in the OR, and Elizabeth couldn't even call him til two. When Robert didn't answer his cell or at home, she decided to pick up Ella at daycare and go to wait for him at the house. Around five, after a few hours of pacing, her cell phone rang. "Will you have dinner with me?" Robert asked her. "What?" she responded but then before continuing, "Are you alright? Where are you?" "I'm at the the cemetery. Let's go to Morton's. Can we get a sitter for Ella?" "Robert!" "Lizzie, I know it's early, but..." "Alright," she shrugged, "Come home first, though." "No," he ended, "Meet you at six." And he hung up.

That night, over two tremendous steaks, Robert told Elizabeth about his mother and about his four different step-fathers. His sisters left home to live with an aunt and uncle but Robert stayed til the end, til he was the only man left. Then after the last marriage ended, mother went away, traveling around the world, and for years it was just postcards and the rare phone call. Not even for his med school graduation. Not even when he became a surgeon, chief of surgery, chief of staff. And when she came back, even though he should have stopped caring he still did, still did everything to please her, still wanted to be the man in her life.

And all of the sudden, she needed taking care of. She was older and smaller and more fragile. At the end she started forgetting, going shopping and getting lost, having her hair done and then going back to have it done the same day. "The last three years, well you, know..." He ended. He looked down at his plate. "How did I talk so much and eat so much?"

"You're just an amazing man," Elizabeth replied with a wide smile. She squeezed his hand under the table. "Let's get dessert," Robert suggested.

For the chocolate mousse cake and the lemon meringue pie, Robert moved his chair around next to Elizabeth's so that they could share. It was eleven o'clock and the restaurant was slowing down. "We should go soon," he suggested, but a little too full to move he stretched and swiveled in his chair to look for a waiter. Elizabeth put a hand on his. "Not so fast," she smiled. "Why this place? What's so special about it?"

"Every time she wanted to tell me something serious, like she was getting married or going away, she would bring me here. I wanted to be mad at her, but she was always so charming. And we'd always eat and laugh and have fun. The best dates I ever had. Well, until you." He paused and smiled into Elizabeth's eyes, then lowered his to continue. "Whenever I missed her, I could always come back here. I don't know. And they have good food?…. Did I answer your question?"

"Yes." And Elizabeth put her arms around Robert and kissed him gently on the cheek.