Hey! I know I said that I probably wouldn't update for awhile, but I did get six reviews and I had a sudden spark of creative ideas for the story. I know have a clearer picture of what I want to happen in the rest of the story. There will be at least two but maybe more chapters after this one. Anyways on with the chapter.
Chapter 8: Alone
Gordo just sat on his bed. He didn't move, he didn't speak. It was as if all of his thoughts, all of his emotions had just left him. But that wasn't true. He could feel alright and he wished he couldn't. It was as if his heart had been cut out of him and then put back in wrong. He had never felt pain like this before. He wished he could just get out of there, but he couldn't move.
GT: God, why did I have to do something? Why couldn't I have just let it go? I knew that this would happen and I did it anyway. No, that's not true, I didn't know this was going to happen. I didn't know that Lizzie could have feelings for me. I thought I knew that she didn't and that I would lose her because of that. But no, I lose her because she does have feelings for me. This is so complicated. Maybe I was too harsh. Maybe I should have just told that it was already forgotten, that we could just go on and pretend that nothing happened. No, I couldn't do that, everything I said was true. I really couldn't have gone on like that, suppressing my feelings. I just don't know what to do. Did she really believe that it wouldn't work out? I suppose there's a chance that it wouldn't, but still. Didn't she remember how much I've been there for her? Didn't she know that I'm a part of her? I could never just stop loving her. God, I'm going around in circles trying to figure this out, but there is no figuring this out. I can't try to get her back. I can't lie to her. I guess I'll just either have to get over her or let her come to me. And that won't ever happen, so I guess I'm alone forever.
Just then Gordo got up and walked towards his radio. He knew that this was another one of those times when he needed to listen to music. Maybe it would help him forget about his fucked up life and let him wallow in his misery. Again, just like the night before, the song that came on made him stop and listen.
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of you tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
You used to captivate me by your resonating mind
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice has chased away
All of the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of you tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all alone
When you cried I'd wipe away all of you tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
GT: What? Did someone search my brain for these songs? How do they always seem to parallel my life exactly?
Gordo had had enough. He turned off his radio, laid down on his bed and began to cry.
That song was My Immortal by Evanescence. I know, short chapter, but more to come shortly. You know the drill. REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW! I'm at 19 so let's try to get it to 25. And no repeats, I don't want two reviews from the same person about the same chapter. Not that it's happened before but just in case. Anyways I luv y'all to pieces, keep on being the loyal fans you are.