Alone Chapter 5

Kathy called me out of the blue last night, and that wasn't even the most bizarre part about it. What really threw me for a loop was that we actually had a civil conversation that ended with an increase in the amount of time I get to spend with my kids. When I hung up the phone, I wasn't even sure I knew the woman I'd just spent forty-five minutes talking to. I sat for a few moments, phone in hand, dumbfounded. The angry sound of the dial tone broke me out of my reverie. I hung up the phone and thought for a moment. What brought on this sudden change? How did she find out how miserable I've been without the kids? Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I grabbed my keys and drove to the source that I wanted to both strangle and kiss at the same time.

I was at her apartment in under 20 minutes; no small feat when navigating through city traffic. I knocked on the door with three short raps. I heard footsteps coming closer and the locks being thrown. The door opened to reveal Olivia, wearing a tank top and snug drawstring pants.

"Elliot? What's going on? Don't tell me we've got another vic," she said.

I smiled and shook my head. "No, no. Nothing like that."

"Are you okay? Did something happen to one of the kids?"

"No, Liv. We're all fine. Can I come in?"

She looked at me quizzically, then pushed the door open and gestured for me to come inside. I closed the door and joined her on the couch.

"Tell me what's going on, El. You're sure everything is alright?"

"Yes and no." I love being cryptic with her. It annoys the shit out of her.

"Elliot..." she said in a warning tone.

"Tell me about your lunch date Tuesday."

"What? No. I had lunch with a friend. That's all you need to know," she replied defensively.

"Olivia. I know you had lunch with Kathy. The cat's out of the bag. What I want to know is why you thought you had the right to invite my ex-wife to lunch and discuss my behavior with my arrangements with my children!"'

"She told you! She promised me that she wouldn't tell you we met—" Before she could continue, I held up my hand to stop her.

"Kathy didn't tell me anything. I figured it out after she called tonight. You seem to be forgetting that I am a detective."

"Look, I didn't mean to upset you or overstep my bounds, but I couldn't sit back and watch you hurt anymore. If you weren't going to do anything about it, I sure as hell had to."

"Why not just talk to me? Why go behind my back to her?"

"Elliot, I've tried to talk to you! You shut me out and threw away the key. There was no getting through to you. I did what I had to do and I'm sorry if it upsets you, but I will not apologize for my actions. I learned a lot from talking to Kathy. She's a very wise woman; maybe you should listen to what she has to say some time. You just might learn something!" I had definitely struck a nerve. I grabbed her hands and held them in mine.

"Olivia, I'll admit that when I first figured it out, I was pissed, but on the way over, I cooled down a bit and realized that I should thank you instead of yelling at you. Obviously, my plan didn't work out so well."

"Wait. That was supposed be a 'thank you'? That's the shittiest thank you I've ever gotten!"

"Yeah, well, expressing gratitude has never been my strong suit," I lamely explained.

We sat for a few moments in a comfortable silence, her TV playing softly as background noise. She was the one to break the silence. "So, did anything good come out of her calling you tonight?"

"Actually, yeah. I can take the kids whenever I want, provided there's nothing going on, on her end. No more 'every other weekend and holiday' crap. She also agreed to take the house and I'm going to find a place closer to the 1-6." I told her.

A smile crept up on her face. "I'm happy for you, as long as these changes make you happy."

"Thanks for opening your mouth, Liv. At the rate I've been going, I would have been moping around for the next six months before I grew the balls to talk to her."

"I try," she said with a toothy grin. "But seriously, Elliot, I learned a lot from her the other day. She's a lot wiser than I think even she realizes. I only wish that what I learned was found out under different circumstances."

I nodded. Although I was curious about their conversation, I knew it was not my place to ask. She'd already told me more about it than she wanted to and for that, I was sincerely grateful. I came to the realization that I had come over, unannounced, like I owned the place and felt like a giant heel. What if she'd had company? Did she have other plans I was putting on hold?

"Sorry for just barging in on you like this. I'll let you get back to whatever you were doing."

"Don't worry about it. You know my door is always open. You have any plans for tonight, Stabler?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah; hot date with my TV and whatever's edible in the fridge," I explained.

"You want to stay then? I was gonna order pizza and watch a movie. Are you man enough to endure a 'chick flick'?"

"For some pepperoni pizza and a Miller, I'm man enough for anything, babe."

"Good. And since you're flexing your 'manly' muscles, you're buying."

"Typical woman," I muttered under my breath. I knew she couldn't hear me; she'd already gone to place our order. She returned to the couch five minutes later, DVD in hand.

"Food in thirty minutes. I was thinking I'd subject you to Mona Lisa Smile and eliminate the tear-jerker angle." She told me with a smile.

"Thanks for your consideration...I think."

Two and a half hours later, pizza eaten and beer drunk, the movie ended. "Olivia Benson, you are a cruel, cruel woman. You know that?"

"Yeah, and that's just one of the things that you find so endearing about me. Besides, I thought you said you were man enough for a chick flick, partner."

"Well, if I'd have known it was that bad, I would have let you question my manliness. At any rate, I should get going. We have to work tomorrow." With that, I reluctantly stood up and readied myself to leave.

"Thanks for hanging out with me, partner. It was fun. Maybe next time, I'll even let you pick the movie," she said as she walked me to the door. I'm not sure why, but I reached over and pulled her into a tight hug. We stayed that way for a few moments, then slowly broke apart. She caught my bicep with her right hand and put her left behind my head. She gently pulled my ear to her mouth and whispered, "I know your curiosity is killing you. Before she left, she made me promise to take care of you, and I accepted. Know that is one promise that I'll never break."

She kissed me on the cheek, then showed me out, locking the door quietly behind me. I stood in her doorway for a minute; completely dumbfounded, just as I'd been after getting off the phone with Kathy. If there was ever any question in my mind before, it was crystal clear now: the two women in my life are extraordinary in their own unique ways and taking either of them for granted is simply not an option.