Chapter Six:"Felicific Calculus Chess"
The voices had ceased. But what came to Squall's ears was wooden pieces slamming across a marble surface... And a constant humming response indicating that someone nearby was lost in a process of consideration.
His head started to ache as the memories of the infinite space of The Illumination Hotel started to surface inside of his mind. Squall tried to sustain the panic, as he felt it crawl up his spine. He tried to choke it. He failed to do so; and he tried to sustain it's voice at least. Failing again, Squall took his panic into his arms, and started to cradle it...
I will not break with this; I will resist the panic!
If it's sound doesn't fade; I'll drown it in static!
Squall slowly started to open up his eyes, and feel the pain on his temples. He faced the pain, but he couldn't surpress it. Failing to do so, he decided to move a little bit upwards, and take a look around. His eyes traced his surroundings which were furniture which consisted of three colours; black, white, lilac. Regular furnitures rested inside the house he seemed to be in, and then, his eyes traced the black-and-white tiles on the floor up to a table that was standing nearby him.
The table was squaretal. It wasn't too high- it was actually too low. Squall traced the table all the way, and his eyes met a girl sitting on a chair next to the table.
The girl was wearing a white, silken dress... The dress didn't have any strands, runes, or shapes on it, it was pure white. Her red hair was falling onto her curved shoulders which revealed her whitish skin. Squall saw her gray eyes trace the chessboard in front of her. He pushed himself up from the ground, and he definately did not like it. He looked at her, and decided that, he was neutral about her appereance.
Her face was not too beautiful; but it wasn't ugly. He walked up to her, and stood by her side, as if to present himself. She didn't respond at all, her black fingernails were still tapping on the side of the table, rather thoughtfully, as she hummed to a melody.
"A lady, playing chess, all by herself?" Squall demanded, "What is your name?"
The girl smiled faintly, and pointed him to sit down with a gentle move. Squall followed her move and sat down.
"I am Purity," the woman said, "The delicacy,
I am your sickness in remedy
And your 'remedy in sickness' parody
Won't you sit down?
And wipe off that frown,
Play with me,
This game of Felicific Calculus Chess!"
Squall stared at the board. The pieces were all where they should've been; the starting position. All of their pieces were right where hey should've been at the beginning of any chess game.
Squall stared at the board, and then, asked, "Felicific Calculus Chess?"
"Something that beats inside your chest..."
"What does a game have to do with my heart?"
"Games are only played on your scar..." Purity replied.
Gently, her right hand reached to the Red Queen. Pushing it forwards ten squares, she let it rest just across Squall's borders, remaining on his left side.
Squall thought about this move as Purity spoke:"Red Queen, Ten Demerits forward."
"Then," he replied, "Gray Castle, four squares forward." He said, pushing the gray castle forwards four squares, meeting Purity's right side.
Purity smiled gently, her right hand fondling her hair.
"Why are you smiling- I am about to conquer!" Squall replied as his left hand reached out to the Gray Knight, and he played it forwards. However, the nature of the move required it's final square to be the one his castle was standing on. Noticing this, he stopped, tried to think of another way.
Sensing his disturbance, Purity shivered. Then, she said, with a shaking voice, "Taking your own castle down- you are conquered!"
The piece flew away from Squall's grasp and landed on the castle, slowly starting to tear it down.
"How can pieces fall away from my control?"
"That is what they do when you lose your soul." Purity replied, starting to cry a bit.
Squall stared at her questioningly, "Why are you crying now?"
"I cry whenever someone is burned down." Purity replied, reaching out to a piece while still crying; Red Castle. She moved it across Squall's left side one square. Then, thoughtfully, she moved it two squares, crying out even louder. Finally, she pushed it four squares, and not satisfied, she pushed it another five squares to meet his knight. The castle ate out the knight almost at once.
"How come you are better than me?"
"Act faster-
We can't play this game forever can we?" Purity demanded, her hands starting to shake violently.
Squall cursed under his breath as Purity desperately started to adjust her outfit. He looked at the pieces, and then, he put both of his hands on his Bishop. He lifted it up, but halway to the square he wanted to push it to, it fell apart, crumbling to tiny little pieces inside his hands.
Purity let out a soft moan in sorrow for his move, continuing to cry.
Squall wondered why his bishop had fallen apart. He then, set his eyes on yet another piece he hadn't used, Pawn. As both his hands went to a Pawn, he saw them disappear. The pawns were disappearing, one by one, as he reached to them.
Purity let out a soft scream as she started to sob violently, shaking the Felicific Calculus Chess board.
"Why are you crying?"
"I am crying,
Solely cause you are lying
In a pool of sin drying
Soon you will be dying..."
Squall was thunderstruck with this piece of information. He stared at her blankly. Then, furiously, he grabbed hold of his King.
His king turned to a spiked block, it's thorns digging deep into Squall's skin. Shouting, Squall squeezed it harder through instinct, and made it deep even digger into his skin...
Then, he felt it shrink inside his palm. He stared at the disappearing thorn nest, and then, his gaze remained on the board. The pieces were still- though they were drenched in Purity's tears.
"JUST STOP CRYING!!!" Squall shouted in fury, and he grabbed hold of his remaining castle... He threw it to Purity, and watched it fly across the surface.
"SOON YOU'LL BE DYING!!!" Purity shouted, as the chess piece flew at her and then, hit her throat.
Squall was in absolute shock after seeing what happened.
The chess piece pierced through her skin, burying itself into her neck, and drawing out her blood, it got out from the other side. Squall watched her blood rush out and cover up all the chess pieces, first blackening them, and then, destroying them. He pushed the table away and fell down on the tiled floor, watching her face shift with hopelessness and sink into the blood on the table, her body starting to be absorbed by the Felicific Calculus Chessboard.
Squall watched Purity disappear in the blood. Watching her pale skin be stained with red, and as the blood touched her body, her skin started to rot.
Shouting in fear, he started to crawl away from the scenenery. The blood dripped off the table, and from the points it touched, the tiles started to melt away, turning to black and then, becoming the horrid, colourful nothingness as The Illumination Hotel. He shouted in fear, not wanting to be in the nothingness again.
Just then, the blood stopped flowing. Squall saw a figure dressed in cobalt stand in front of him. He had a torn trenchcoat on, and the rest of his clothes were made of baggy, torn pants, a torn shirt. His blonde hair was pulled in a rather ragged rasta style. He turned to look at Squall with his blinded eyes.
"I am Denial,
I am your trial of deception
I am your wraith.
I'm the smile
That you strike in perception
As you lose faith.
Meanwhile
Should you accept or decline
Your status?
So vile-
Circumsised out of your mind
A lazarus..."
Denial smiled then. Squal shievered with the sight of his grey, unseeing eyes. He then, outstretched his hand to Squall.
"Stand up, my friend,
Our time is about to end
Let us run while we can
I will help you make amends."
"Where will we go, do I need a weapon?" Squall asked.
Denial smiled. He said,
"We will pass through a hall that leads to the grave of Reason.".
Author's Note: It's actually quite easy to realise which chess piece to which square are metaphors to what. Only if you are good with numbers, you can easily figure it out. Sorry it took a bit to update, hella busy with finals, I was. Now, if you would like to know more about the metaphorical nature of this chess game, and/or the entire story's settings, strange details given, etc. Basically, any question at all, please e-mail me at " . A minor detail though; "Felicific Calculus" is a liberal theory that follows this equation: "Pleasure-PainHappiness".