Chapter 9 – Love and Confrontation
The Library was quiet, and Asenath Paroo was as downcast as a young girl could possibly be on a rainy Tuesday evening.
She had become used to her life of obscurity at Hogwarts; she might not have been popular but at least she had some measure of peace and quiet. Each day had its own cycle – breakfast, classes, lunch, classes, dinner, and study. The routine of her schoolgirl's life had suited her just fine. And suddenly, a fellow Gryffindor named Sirius Black and a Slytherin boy named Severus Snape had lobbed a bomb right in the middle of it.
Well, that wasn't entirely fair. She had started it. But then again, Sirius Black probably had. It all confused her in retrospect, figuring out who thought what and when.
Without Sirius' interference in their mutual lives, Severus and Asenath would have passed one another anonymously for yet another year. However, Asenath – as well as Black – hadn't seen fit to mind their own respective businesses, but that of Severus Snape's instead. And there lay the crux of the problem.
Well – the truth of it really was that Asi could no longer blame Sirius Black, the creator of the prank that landed the students in trouble.
After all, no one had told her to kiss Severus again.
But she had wanted to.
She still wanted to.
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Asenath was still naïve enough not to know that forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest, and that if she and Sev had been stuck with one another as lab partners, for example, neither one of them would have turned the other's head.
But --
All the satisfaction of having someone finally attracted to you, after such an immensely long adolescent dry spell! And having that someone be a boy who was Dark and mysterious and tragic! Defiance of Parents! All that breathless excitement! All that sneaking around!
Her parents had finally gone back home, having concluded that their darling daughter had been hexed and that is why she acted as she had. It had been eminently clear to both of Asenath's parents, certainly, that the boy was bad news. Son of a wizard who had received the Dementor's Kiss? Depressed and suicidal? Former inmate of the psychiatric ward of St. Mungo's Hospital? Good gods! Her mother nearly died of embarrassment.
Her father, on the other hand, had gone looking for Severus but had been headed off just in the nick of time by none other than Minerva McGonagall. The Transfiguration professor had feared that young Snape might be hexed into the center of the nearest planetary body if the irate father had his way.
"I am inclined to agree with your sentiments, Mr. Paroo," she had said with a very catlike tilt of her head. "However, the Headmaster will handle the matter to his satisfaction, if not to yours."
"Well then, woman, Deuce take you!" Paroo had snapped in his frustration.
"I expect that I would present a far too formidable challenge for him," she had responded as neat as you please, and then went to dinner.
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Severus Snape wandered down the long upstairs Library corridor housing books containing charms against heartache. He would also survey the Restricted Section after midnight, as he was allowed to do by Professor Sartoris.
Sev's body as well as his heart missed Asenath. She had burst into his consciousness with all the mystery and marvel that is Woman. That such a lovely creature wanted him was beyond his understanding. Like many people plagued with self-doubt, the boy saw very little to like in his nature. After being called ugly all his life, she called him handsome. After being called evil all his life, she thought him good enough for her.
It never occurred to the boy that Asenath resembled Martis Vox.
Sev quickened his pace, and then slowed just as abruptly, rapidly scanning the shelves for a volume titled "Heart-Balms Great and Small". He nearly shrieked when a gentle hand with polished oval nails reached out from the other side of the stacks to touch his shoulder.
"Peek-a-boo!" Asenath whispered.
Sev's jaw dropped. Without a single rational thought in his head and powered forward with a high-test mixture of adrenaline and testosterone, he ran around to reach the other side. She had, too; they nearly collided with each other.
"Oh Sevi," she moaned, enfolding him and holding him tight.
"My beautiful, beautiful girl," he sighed, picking her up around the waist and swinging her off the ground.
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"My dear Mr. Pettigrew, do you see what I see?" Sirius Black whispered.
"Uhh, they're kissing and stuff?"
"You've hit upon it, just as I knew you would! Yes. Two students, forbidden from seeing one another, clutched together in full liplock. If they were pressed any closer, they would be behind each another. Unfortunate."
"What?" said Pettigrew.
"Oh, never mind, Wormtail. Don't trouble your head about it. Now be a good fellow and go fetch Madam Pince, and make it quick."
Peter Pettigrew scratched his head, and then smiled. He headed off to the other side of the building. That kid is as dumb as a box of rocks, Sirius thought to himself.
The Gryffindor boy then sneaked his camera out of his pocket and snapped off a few quick shots just in case Dumbledore, McGonagall, and Penderdandis needed any convincing.
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"WHAT ARE THE TWO OF YOU DOING BACK HERE IN THE STACKS?"
The librarian of Hogwarts bustled over in righteous indignation, looking around for any disarrangement of her precious volumes.
"We were doing it on top of the Annotated Encyclopedia of Arithmancy," Snape replied with a sneer.
This was a clearly an error of judgment, as the woman's nostrils flared to a dangerous extent. She looked as if she might start puffing sulphurous fumes. "BOTH OF YOU GO TO THE HEADMASTER'S OFFICE IMMEDIATELY! I will be along very shortly!"
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Both Severus and Asenath were dumbstruck and fearful. Asi was terrified of her father's reaction should he find out that she had anything further to do with the "psychotic little snake", as he called Snape. She grabbed Sev's arm, her fingers digging into him.
"Let's run away! My parents will kill me if they have to come back here! Maybe if we spend a few weeks away, they can get used to the idea and settle down a bit and then we can be together!"
Severus looked at her in amazement. Here was a lovely, delicious young woman, begging him to run off with her. He would have pinched himself to ensure that he was awake, but Asenath's fingers now fulfilled the same purpose. A rush of joy coursed through his heart. He was elated, his spirits uplifted!
And then –
No.
Severus Snape couldn't run off with the lovely, delicious young woman.
He had to stay behind to join the damned Dark Lord's minions.
He had to try to insinuate his way into a position of authority amidst the Death Eaters by doing gods know what. He had to tread the narrow and terrifying path of serving two masters. He had to live to help the Child of Light, if there ever was or would be one.
He could not give his heart away because his life was forfeit.
"I – I can't," he whispered to her as the two clung to one another.
"Why not?" Asenath wailed. "Don't you like me, Sevi?"
Severus cupped her face in his hands. "Asi, you are wonderful. But let's be practical." His mind rapidly formulated an apt reply. "We would both be expelled. You are in your sixth year and I am in my seventh. We wouldn't graduate. We have no money. I don't think anyone would be interested in hiring us because we're legally still children under the laws, both Wizard and Muggle."
Asenath sobbed in desolation. "You just don't like me. Nobody did until you came along."
Severus almost wept himself out of frustration and loss. "Asi, please. This has nothing to do with how we feel about each other. This goes to our ability to live our lives together. You are so beautiful, and so kind and lovely. I – "
Sev almost bit his tongue in half to keep from saying the "L" word. He could not love this girl and run off with her and keep his damned promises to Dumbledore. His heart ached.
Both now heard the clacking of Madam Pince's black shoes. Resigned to settling for less and accepting his Dark future, Severus took Asi by the hand and led her to the Gryphon staircase.
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The librarian bustled the students into the Headmaster's Office, where she told Albus what had happened. Dumbledore then Flooed Professor Penderdandis, the Slytherin Head of House, and Professor McGonagall, his Gryffindor counterpart.
Within one minute, all three faculty members sat assembled and Madam Pince returned to her duties. Sev and Asi sat like orphans before the storm.
The Headmaster opened the proceedings rather abruptly.
"You were seen together in the Library, in clear violation of our order to stay away from one another. You have seen fit to once again defy those who are charged with protecting you. Miss Paroo, I can't imagine how your father and mother will feel about it. Mr. Snape, in addition to being seen with Miss Paroo, you were defiant and flippant to Madam Pince. You are piling Ossa upon Pelion, children. What do you have to say for yourselves?"
Asenath began to cry. She didn't work up much sympathy by doing so except from Severus, who felt like crying himself but would rather be boiled in oil than to show his true face to this crowd.
"We saw each other in the Library. That's all," Sev said in a cool and clipped voice.
"You weren't in physical contact with one another?"
Sev raised his chin. Might as well go for it. "No. Nothing happened."
"I beg your pardon, Mr. Snape," said Professor McGonagall, "but here are photos of the two of you." She withdrew Sirius Black's snapshots from her voluminous pockets and handed them to the Headmaster.
Dumbledore examined them briefly, and then handed them to Professor Penderdandis. The old gentleman sighed and shook his head before he showed them to the two students.
"It is painfully obvious that you have lied to us, Mr. Snape," the Headmaster said. The boy looked into the face of his mentor and saw no forgiveness there. His stomach churned. Could it be that he was seeing Albus' true face? How badly had he disappointed him?
"All right. It's clear that we were set up and probably by Black and his crew," Severus said in an ice-cold voice. "If we're guilty of caring for one another – "
Minerva sat up as straight as a stovepipe. "Is that what you call it -- 'caring', Mr. Snape?" she snapped. "If it is, then the entire female student populace of Hogwarts should head for the hills!"
"Mi-NER-va!" Professor Penderdandis chided.
Albus' face had darkened considerably in the last few moments. He steepled his fingers under his chin and glared at Severus. "It is my view that older students should be held to a higher standard of care than younger. And frankly, Mr. Snape, your display of attitude at this school over the last few days has angered me a great deal."
Severus' breath caught in his throat. He stared into Dumbledore's eyes and saw no mercy there. His heart skipped a few beats from the anxiety and distress he felt. He would die without Albus Dumbledore to keep him together. He was the only soul on Earth who could keep the harpies from his heels.
And then Minerva McGonagall made the mistake of interjecting herself.
"Young man, you will keep a civil tongue in your head. I will not hear any impertinence from a boy whose track record here would surely earn him an expulsion at any other school. It is only out of the goodness of our hearts that we have kept you here. We have been aware of your – misfortunes, but – "
"Professor McGonagall," warned Penderdandis, raising an outstretched hand towards her, as in supplication.
"– quite frankly, Mr. Snape, we have gone overboard in tolerating your maladjusted personality and now find ourselves with a spoiled, overbearing, and pompous brat who now sees fit to endanger the young women of this institution of learning!"
Minerva's recital was so enormous, so damning, and so breathtaking that the other two adults in the room were stunned into silence.
"Why don't you keep your mouth closed?" Severus yelped, standing up and balling his fists. Both Penderdandis and Dumbledore leaned forward to keep him from lurching toward McGonagall. "You've done nothing but torment me since the day I arrived here! You don't know my life, woman! You don't know what it was like to – "
Asenath, sobbing now, grabbed the Slytherin boy by the shoulders to pull him back. Penderdandis grabbed his forearm and was rewarded with what felt like the stings of a dozen summer hornets.
"Don't touch me," Severus hissed in a hoarse whisper.
For the count of five, no one dared to breathe. The old man finally released the boy's arm.
From the throat of Albus Dumbledore came a voice of stunning power.
"SEVERUS SILANUS SNAPE! ANOTHER WORD OUT OF YOU AND I WILL EXPEL YOU FROM THIS SCHOOL!"
Snape looked up at his beloved erstwhile father and then stood there, horrified at himself as well as at the Headmaster. His shoulders slumped and his head dropped forward. "I – I'm sorry," Severus whispered, hands clutched tightly in his hair, as if he meant to rip it out by the double-handfuls.
"Mr. Snape, you will not bother this girl again," said Dumbledore, standing from behind his desk.
"He wasn't bothering me, Headmaster! I – "
Minerva McGonagall shushed Asenath harshly. "Do be quiet, you foolish girl!"
"Miss Paroo, apparently you have disregarded your parents' wishes and have now dug yourself a deeper hole in which to flounder. Because of your obstinacy and lack of good sense, you shall receive ten detentions with Professor McGonagall. You will also not leave Hogwarts for any reason whatsoever for the remainder of the term. When your parents ask why, I intend to tell them."
The girl gasped, white-faced with shame and shock.
"You may go," Dumbledore said.
The weeping girl fled the room. Nobody raised their eyes high enough to follow her.
"Mr. Snape. In the past few minutes, you have challenged my authority, insulted a respected teacher, and assaulted your own Head of House. You are out of control on so many levels that it takes my breath away."
Severus, face still obscured by his long dark hair, moaned.
"You will serve ten detentions with Professor McGonagall, ten detentions with Professor Penderdandis, and be restricted to the school grounds for the remainder of the year. Further, Slytherin House will suffer the loss of fifty points for your display of bad breeding and arrogance.
Severus sat up rigid, eyes dry. "Very well, Headmaster. You will regret this."
"Now this Slytherin is threatening you, Albus!" McGonagall shrieked. "Is there no end to his envy and spite?"
Without another word, Severus jerked himself out of the chair and left the office, slamming the warded doors behind him.
"Bloody old Headmaster favors his own House! What a surprise!" shrieked Severus Snape, stunning the group of Hufflepuffs on their way to their common room.
"Dumbledore will always favor his own!" he spat as he passed a couple of Ravenclaws on the stairs.
"Stupid old git doesn't have the sense the gods gave a goose," he snarled as he stomped to the Slytherin common room entrance.
"He'll rue the day he crossed me!"
He burst into the common room, where a good number of students sat relaxing or studying.
"Just wait until you hear this..." Severus began, and then he put all the strength he had into slamming the door shut with a resounding crash.