A little change in the 10th chapter….this one is from Sara's POV.
I hope you like it anyway.
Disclaimer: I own nothing (sadly!)
SPOILERS: all Seasons (including SEASON 5)
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breaking my own heart
epilogue
"Sometimes it feels like ages have gone by. The day that he had blown up the wedding ceremony seems so far away.
I'd lie if I'd say that my life hasn't changed, though my feelings never did. I realize that I had still loved him, although I lived with Nick, although Nick and I wanted to marry…and I really wanted to marry him. But I think I hadn't been in love with him at all. It had just felt so right, or better said good, to be loved.
I had always loved Gil more than everything else. And I still love him more than my own life.
Things changed.
Sometimes I think about the past and wonder if I would be as happy as I am now, if I would have married Nick.
All I think then, is that what ever would have happened on that ceremony, when the minister had asked me if I want to love him and support him, through good and bad times, until death does us apart, I would have said 'no'. Why? Because deep in my heart I always knew that I could never really love Nick. That sounds hard. And it is, I don't want to discuss that. I can't make it unhappen, I can't turn back time. And I honestly don't want to, because I believe that people grow and learn from their actions, from their mistakes.
So did I.
Nick did.
Gil did.
I learned that, denying my feelings, pretending to myself that I could get over the love of my life…wont make me happier. Now I am happy. Even if there were hard times we had to go through. We managed them together. In good and bad times, that was what we had promised each other, not in front of God, but in front of Elvis. Yes Elvis….when we had returned to Vegas the first place we went to was a wedding chapel. Maybe that was too fast…but honestly, we didn't care about that.
Nick realized that I would have never been really happy with him. We're good friends now. Better friends than we had been before. I know people always say 'and we will stay friends' and never really mean it…but we really are. We had to get along with each other. We work together…and we still do. I think Nick realized that he had somehow always known that Gil and I are meant to be together. He accepted our relationship, and so did all the others.
And about Gil, I think Gil learned the most in this past six month. He learned to open up himself, he learned to talk about his feelings, at least to me…I could tell a lot more about that…but I think that…he would like to keep private things private.
We're still newly weds, and that's just the way we behave. Gladly we never got caught during our several, not youth free actions during our brakes in his office or…well, privacy.
In a few month our lives will change, because then we wont be alone anymore. I still don't know how to get this all straight, because I really don't have any practice in those things…children had never been my thing. But like I said…we change, we learn, we grow up.
And whatever life holds in its hands for us. I believe that there is a reason for everything that happens. A reason for the things that decide where our lives go.
Can we change these?
I don't know, but I know that life definitely is a roller coaster. And so is love.
I know that as long as we listen to our hearts, we wont ever be able to regret our actions. Listening to your heart is the only right thing you can do when it comes to love, otherwise you'll end up breaking your own heart."
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THE END
Okay, the end is a little…..weird…..maybe, I don't know how to describe this.
I hope you liked that story anyway…
I loved to read your reviews….and I want to thank everybody who reviewed this story and encouraged me to keep on writing.
I can't promise you that, but maybe I will write a sequel, tell me if you want one.