Losing Sleep
By DistinctVagueness
Chapter 5
The next week passed swiftly. Hermione only departed from Gryffindor Tower twice in the later hours, other than her Head Girl duties. As she ventured near to the entrance hall, she would hesitate before getting closer to the stairs. Part of her knew she was being irrational- it was unlikely that Snape would end up in the same place in such a state twice in a week, but the lingering doubt in the back of her mind would hinder her steps before she hastened them, murmuring fractiously at herself when she found that she was quite alone.
She wondered whether he'd given any thought at all to allowing her to be his assistant. The moment she had left his office, dismay had flooded her features. She honestly hadn't meant to forward herself for the job like that, which would no doubt entail chivvying her around like an unpaid servant and taking delight in watching her perform menial jobs to make his easier. But after she'd thought about it for a while, it hadn't seemed like such a bad idea. She'd have an excuse to be in his lab after hours, thus being able to keep an eye out for any sudden disappearances or returns.
Hermione hadn't entirely been lying about pursuing a career in Potions. The subject, though she rarely admitted it, was her favourite, followed closely by Arithmancy. There was something to creation by trial and error, to watching in trepidation as a cauldron began to bubble and to bottling a successful test.
If she were civil and helpful at all times, there was the chance that she'd be allowed to help him in his more difficult work, and learn facts and techniques that were never revealed in Potions class.
Eventually, she came to the conclusion that it would allow her to keep an eye on him, thus making sure he came back from any Death-Eater gatherings in one piece. It felt odd, 'taking care' of him in that way, but she was strangely reassured.
It all depended on whether he agreed or not.
-
Severus strode into the classroom and slammed a pile of work onto the desk. He was five minutes late for the lesson and the seventh years had already seen his absence as an excuse to talk. They abruptly fell into silence at the abject scowl on his face.
He made a sharp gesture at the board with his wand. Instructions written in his spidery handwriting flooded the board, accompanied with a small, neat diagram.
"Do it. Now."
He sank down into his chair. He hated being late for his own lessons. On the other hand, it allowed him to squash the hope that no doubt crept into their hearts at the thought that he wasn't going to turn up at all. It was Dumbledore's fault, as usual. The old coot had started on about trying Duelling lessons for first years up, instead of just fifth to seventh years. That was all he needed. To spend his spare nights removing tails from tiny Gryffindors and trying in vain to stop shocked little Hufflepuffs from crying after being hit with Stinging Hexes.
Perhaps he was being harsh, but to be honest he didn't particularly care.
With a concealed sigh, he picked up one of the textbooks that littered the desk and began to scan through the pages, listing those that would be useful for lesson plans next week. Before engrossing himself properly, he glanced up at his class.
The majority of them were either reading the board or looking in their books for references. The room was void of their chatter, in the last year those who had decided to take N.E.W.T-standard Potions had became more ascetic, taking their lessons seriously.
A couple of Slytherins, he was pleased to note, had begun to find apparatus and ingredients. His eyes passed over to the other side of the room and rested on one particular Gryffindor. Of course. Miss Granger.
The girl had already set up her cauldron on a mild flame and was pulling small containers from her bag. He frowned and turned his head a little to get a better look. What was she doing?
It soon became apparent that Miss Granger was exceeding her usual standard of preparation. She was carefully removing ingredients from the tubs, which were ready for the potion.
He raised an eyebrow behind his book. Not many students cared about time efficiency in Potions, but he knew that if he demanded they prepare their ingredients before attending lessons, he'd have a lot of extra time to fit in what he now could not.
Severus remembered now what she'd asked him. It had escaped his mind though he had actually meant to devote at least five minutes in the week to his decision. He looked up again as the brunette screwed up her eyes and focused on tipping a small amount of liquid from a beaker into her cauldron.
He'd never had an 'assistant' before. He'd barely considered it, really and it wasn't as though students were queuing up to spend more time with him than strictly necessary. Would it be so bad, he wondered. Granger was more than adequate at the subject and as long as she was confined to the classroom and his storeroom, he supposed, her presence would be tolerable.
Yes, he decided. Miss Granger could have the job if she was willing.
-
As Hermione pushed the last of her books into her bulging bag, she glanced furtively up at the front desk. Snape staring at a piece of parchment looking decidedly more bored as his eyes perused the lines. She imagined him yawning and then bit back a smile. It was hard to imagine any other expression coming from those thin lips other than a scowl, or the patented lip curl.
The last week he had shown no indication that he knew of her existence at all. He'd swept past her in the corridors and barely blinked. She wondered if he'd forgotten her request. Great. That would make it even worse. It would be rather humiliating having to repeat her request. He'd probably also forgotten what she'd done for him that night, mortified so much at the fact that she'd had to patch him up, that he'd blocked it out.
Besides that, Hermione knew she might as well ask him now. There wasn't a better time, presuming of course, that there was ever a 'good' time to ask for something from him. She decided to dawdle a little until the rest of the class had filed out. As she pretended to find something at the bottom of her bag, Draco passed by her desk. They met eyes for a second and to her surprise, he gave her a solemn nod and then continued towards the door.
"Miss Granger?"
Hermione jumped at the sudden baritone address from the front of the room and turned to see Professor Snape looking directly at her.
"Remain here for a moment before you leave, Miss Granger," he told her before following the lingering line of students with a critical eye as they left. With no reason to fruitlessly fumble around in her bag, Hermione fastened it and hoisted the weight onto her shoulder before pushing her chair underneath the desk and going to the front.
The door clicked shut behind the last girl to leave the classroom. Snape's eyes turned to the girl before him and he placed his quill on the desk and stood up. Hermione took a hesitant step backwards. He was so very tall when he was this close up and his soot-coloured robes only added to his imposing nature.
"I have considered your request, Miss Granger. Do you still wish to take on the responsibility?"
Hermione nodded quickly. "Yes, sir."
"Then I will allow you a trial period of one week to see if you are tolerable or not. Do you understand?"
Again, Hermione nodded. This was as good an acceptance as she was ever going to get she thought to herself, trying not to take much notice of his uninterested tone.
"I expect you at my office at seven o'clock. Do not be late," he added.
"I won't, sir."
"We'll see," he told her warningly. Hermione felt a slight chill tiptoeing along her spine and felt an overwhelming urge to break away from his steady charcoal gaze. When she did so, she thought she saw a corner of his mouth quirk ever so slightly, as if smirking at her unease.
He looked away from her then and sat down to continue with whatever it was he'd been writing before he'd summoned her to his desk. Hermione glanced diffidently at the door. Was this her cue to leave?
Snape raised his head to look at her. His jaw clenched slightly in annoyance. "What are you waiting for? Go!"
And go she did, closing the door quietly behind her. After taking a few steps down the darkened corridor, she smiled. That was the hard part over with.
-
Severus wrote 'Caedmon and Allegra Snape' on the envelope and quickly sealed it with a dash of hot wax. He put it to one side, hoping he'd remember to send it with Seth later. He hadn't written to his parents in a while and had thought now a good a time as any. It was just placing quill to paper, her thought, but it took a great deal of energy for him to relate his current state of affairs to them. Omitting a good portion of his time at Hogwarts involved the creation of a few lies here and there. This was mostly for his mother's benefit. His father, he knew, had suspicions that his past wasn't entirely behind him.
He got up and opened the door that led to his classroom. Miss Granger was standing at the side of the classroom lining up the jars she'd filled and labelled surprisingly quickly. He leaned against the doorframe, crossed his arms across his chest and watched as she pulled her bag from the floor and rooted around in it, eventually locating a long, thin piece of plastic. He frowned in confusion as she held it up to the shelf, glancing repeatedly back at it as she shuffled the jars about. Severus realised in amusement that it must be a Muggle ruler. She was ensuring that the jars were the same distance apart from each other, with just enough space to lift them easily from the shelf. He often did the same, but using the width of two fingers as a guide as he'd never seen fit to purchase a ruler. He absently wondered whether the Arithmancy witch, Vector, would have one. It was strangely comforting to know he wasn't the only one with a sometimes neurotic need for perfection with the simplest of things. He knew his reason was to perhaps compensate for other things in his life. What was hers?
As she stepped back and looked at her work in approval, he broke the silence.
"Are you quite finished, Miss Granger?"
The bushy-haired girl started at his voice and turned.
"Oh, it's- yes, sir. I thought I might as well put them on this shelf since it was empty…unless you needed it for something else…" she trailed off, looking awkward, the ruler dropping to her side.
Severus was tempted to begin ranting but stopped himself. He would have placed them there himself. There would be time for shouting next time if he discovered them to be in some random order.
"I assume you have your Head Girl duties to see to now, Miss Granger?"
"Yes, I'm on hall duty."
He thought for a moment. "I seem to recall it being Mr Malfoy's turn this evening."
She nodded. "We have joint duty on Thursdays, sir."
"And how do you find working with Mr Malfoy?"
"Pardon?" she looked at him with confusion.
Severus exhaled in impatience. "Do you co-operate with him?"
"Of course, sir."
He began to nod to himself before turning towards his office. "I'll need you again on Monday evening. I suggest you go now before you are as late for your duty as you were to assist me."
Severus noted with triumph the way her fists clenched at her sides as his remark struck her. She had been all of ten seconds late and he'd squeezed all the snide comments he could out of it. It was rather entertaining to see her bite her tongue for once, though he did wonder why she didn't protest or defend herself. Perhaps he'd try a Delaying Charm on the corridor outside one night if he were bored.
"Goodnight Miss Granger." Without waiting for a reply he shut his office door behind him.
On the way out of the room, Hermione kicked a table leg in frustration, imagining it was Snape's shin and winced at the sudden pain. She was determined to see this through, no matter how much damage she ended up doing to her unfortunate foot.
-
Draco leant against the wall by the foot of the stairs and stared off into space. It wasn't like her to be late for duty. She was usually the one waiting for him. He heard sudden footsteps upon stone and stiffened, glancing about him. There was no one around as far as he could see and he automatically reached put one hand on his wand, which was placed inside his pocket.
In the dim candlelight, he recognised familiar bushy hair heading up the dungeon steps and he let out a breath of relief that he didn't known he'd been holding. As she came closer, he could hear her muttering under her breath. Her mouth was set in a firm line and her brown eyes were narrowed and occupied. She looked up and his presence suddenly registered with her.
"Oh, it's you," she said stopping, her countenance still set.
Draco raised an eyebrow at the impromptu greeting. "Glad to see you too."
Hermione's face softened. "Sorry."
He nodded in acceptance. "Where were you?"
Her features looked a little more pinched at his question. "In the Potions lab. Do you mind coming up to the tower with me? I need to put my bag in the common room."
Draco fell into step wither her as she started up the stairs. "Why were you in Potions?"
Hermione said something very quickly. He frowned. "Pardon?"
She sighed. "I'm Snape's assistant."
"Snape's- since when does he have an 'assistant'?"
"Since I asked him."
Draco was surprised. He didn't think anyone, let alone a Gryffindor would sign up for that job.
"Why would you do that?"
"It'll look good for university and I like Potions." Hermione looked at him accusingly. "Is that so surprising?"
"Not for you." She turned the corner, leading towards the Gryffindor tower.
She glowered at him and he held up his hands in defence.
"I'm joking. It's just that he's not exactly what I'd perceive as a gratifying person to work for."
"That's not the point," he heard her murmur under her breath but before he could say anything else, she spoke again.
"I'll be back in a minute," she told him before quickly going up the winding steps.
When she returned, they both fell silent again. The conversation had been odd for both of them, considering that the only two words they usually deemed necessary were 'hello' and 'goodnight.' However, after checking around the Hufflepuff entrance, Hermione spoke up, hesitantly this time.
"Draco?"
He looked to her in surprise. Being continually referred to by her as 'Malfoy' was tradition and he wasn't the most susceptible person to change.
"Do you…would you say you knew Professor Snape well?"
He hadn't expected a question like that. Why did Gr- Hermione want to know? Briefly, he wondered whether Potter had told her to get friendly and try to find out whether he was a potential Death-Eater or not. It wasn't impossible.
"A bit, I suppose," he answered.
"Does he have many relatives?" she pressed.
Confused at her interest, Draco shook his head. "Not many. Just his parents. And me, I guess."
She frowned. "You?"
"Well not technically. He's my godfather."
He watched her absorb the information with a hint of surprise.
"Why?" he asked.
"No reason…I just wondered." Her pace began to speed up a little and he decided not to question her again. He did feel a little apprehensive though. It was strange for her to ask something like that out of the blue. Draco wondered whether it had anything to do with her new 'job'. He wasn't sure he wanted to believe that she was asking on behalf of Potter. Her friendliness had seemed too real for him to accept that. Tucking his reservations away in his mind, he accelerated his steps to keep up with the Gryffindor.
A/N: From my own decision and the resounding opinions I received- there will be no DM/SS/HG triangle, though there may be some conflicting feelings. Not necessarily from DM or SS either. Rubs hands together in glee How I love tormenting them. Thanks for the enthusiastic response. Much appreciated and I've been getting back on track lately with my fics and have posted updates to Anam Cara and IDWTBA in the last two days.
Captain Oblivious- Interesting plot bunny, but poor Draco! He's meant for somebody I'm sure but not our leading lady. Thanks for reviewing!
Winter Solstice- Isn't he just?! I love the word 'flounce' and it seemed very Snape-ish to me so I threw it in for good measure. (Camp? Nooo! Not this Sevvie!) I'm glad the flow doesn't seem to have any bumps in transitions; I think it's important to develop it from different character perspectives. Thanks for the feedback.
Strega-in-progress- I'm sorry to hear about your PC probs. I can sympathise, Mine puts me through hell. Thanks for the review!
Embattledcurve- I rather liked that review, mostly because of your honesty. I agree that it would 'deflect this fic from its original purpose' which is why (see above), there will be no love triangle, as such. Draco's character and future in this story is pretty much decided anyway. Thanks for stopping by.
M'cha Araem- Nope, I haven't seen that movie but I'm now intrigued. I will keep an eye out for it. Who's in it? Thanks for the review. Also, does your penname have a meaning?
DistinctVagueness