"The Ultimate Fanfic (or not!)"
By: AnimaeAriesGirl and her big sis Tin!
Notes: Hiya guyz, AnimaeAriesGirl here! This is my very first fanfic, written with my big sis Tin. It's hella long, but I promise it's SOOOO worth it, so please read on. Just wanna say that all characters in this fanfic are not mine, they are trademarks of SquareSoft/Square Enix...well except for Sage and the evil villain whose name will be mentioned later... Enjoy minna-san!
Chapter 14- Training Day!
"Coffee…Mmmm…" mumbled Cloud sleepily as he walked into the kitchen where the other warriors sat.
Tifa poured him a cup of coffee as he sat, and she questioned, "Are you alright, Cloud? You're normally wide awake early in the morning."
Aeris nodded in agreement as she started to serve pancakes to Sabin, who was drooling with hunger. Carefully moving away from Sabin as he attacked his food, Aeris said, "Well I'm surprised, Cloud. As a former SOLDIER you should be used to early morning."
Cloud sipped his coffee grimly not wanting to explain that he saw "ghosts" during the night and couldn't sleep. He lamely replied, "Well, uh, it was a rough night. I couldn't sleep that comfortably in a bed provided by this Evil Villain. I was awake most of the night because –uh- I was being –uh- vigilant." He smiled confidently at his excuse. "Yeah, that's it, vigilant."
Locke raised an eyebrow and snickered. He mumbled to Celes, "Whatever. He was afraid of being bitten by Vincent."
Celes giggled softly. She glanced around and her gaze landed on a disgruntled Sephiroth. She commented, "Perhaps the early-morning-sleepy look is typical of SOLDIERs. General Sephy doesn't look too bright-eyed either."
Sephy scowled and snapped, "I'm perfectly fine, woman!" He sulked and mumbled quietly, "Well fine except for the face someone—or something yikes! - spilled some cold water on my unmentionables…"
At that moment, Vivi walked in greeting everyone good morning. Cid asked gruffly, "You sleep alright, kid?"
Vivi nodded, "Uh-huh, slept great! Well despite Quina's snoring-"
Quina snorted while stuffing a stack of pancakes into shim's mouth, "I no snore. You hear things!"
Zidane snickered, "Ha and Kuja looks like a straight guy, Humph… I could hear Quina's snoring over Steiner'…geez…"
Vivi shrugged and said, "Well, I slept great after my glass of water." He saw Vincent drinking some Earl Grey tea and said, "G'morning, Mr. Vamp!"
Vinny sighed and said, "I told you I'm not a- ahhh nevermind. Good morning, little one."
Breakfast went relatively well. Pancakes, omelets, bacon, sausage, hash browns, and pastries were served and eaten. Thanks to the cooking skills of the women, the meal was greatly satisfying. Of course, some warriors needed an extra boost of java than some. Cloud and Sephy drank black coffee since they stayed up most of the night because of their ghostly encounters. Zidane added more sugar to his dark roast coffee since he hardly slept with Steiner and Quina's Snoring Sonatas. Sezter gulped down cups of cappuccino as he complained it was too early to be up. (Being the dedicated gambler that he is, Setzer usually plays all night and sleeps all day.)
Beatrix finished her juice and grapefruit and said, "Today we should train. We ought to look at the battle room and see what weapons we can equip."
Cyan agreed, serious as usual. "Indeed, for this monstrous villain hath no mercy upon us at battle front. 'Tis best we arm thineselves with care and pray to the Goddesses that our sword strikes true and we shall triumph over his heinous spirit."
Before anyone could muster a "huh?" Shadow quickly translated, "Arm your really well cuz we're gonna kick Evil Villian's ."
Edgar cleared his throat and said, "Yeah, ummm well put, Shadow. Shall we train, ladies and gentlemen?"
The group of warriors exited the kitchen to find the battle room. After a few wrong turns and "colorful suggestions" from Cid, the group found themselves in front of an enormous door with large battle-axes adorning it.
Dagger remarked, "Well, I'm guessing this must be the Battle Room… or the Beheading Room."
Barret grunted, "Les' go in awready! Open the damn door!"
With much effort of pushing, the doors soon gave way and opened into an expansive room. In the center, lay a large oval table, the Battle Planning Table. The warriors slowly walked further in, amazed at the sheer size of the room. The following room was the weapons room. An arsenal of weapons covered the walls from floor to ceiling. There were axes, rods, spears, swords, knuckles, ninja stars, shields, and armor everywhere.
Zidane whistled loudly, "Holy Eidolons! Every weapon from every dimension and world must be in here. No doubt you'd find something good here."
Sephy nodded coolly, surveying the Wall o' Weapons. He smiled with an evil glint and said, "I'm sold. This villain is going to be in pain when I'm done. I'm gonna find me a sword!" Sephy—uncharacteristically for a former evil villain and general- skipped to the sword section, happily grinning like a child. He squealed in delight as he found his sword, "Oh Masamune! How I love thee!"
Everyone sweat-dropped and Setzer walked to Sephy, trying to calm down his brother's excitement. "Now, now, lil' bro, put the pretty weapon down and quit hugging it before you poke your eye out."
As everyone tried to find a weapon, Terra looked through the sword selection, finding the mighty Ragnarok. She swung it expertly, feeling the familiarity of the blade in the blade in her hand.
Sephy saw Terra with the great sword and smiled, "Great choice Terra. That's a fine sword. Do you need any help with-"
VROOM! "Ah, I found a new chainsaw!" Edgar said meaningfully, glaring at Sephy. Sephy whimpered YIP! , backing away from Terra about ten feet.
Terra looked quizzically at Edgar and sheathed her sword.
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The others continued searching for their weapons and ultimately ended with the following:
FF6
FF7
FF9
Edgar Pearl Lance Chainsaw
Cloud Ultima Weapon
Zidane Orichulum
Sabin Tiger Claw
Vincent Death Penalty
Dagger Healing Rod
Terra Ragnarok
Tifa Premium Heart
Steiner Excalibur
Celes Rune Blade
Aeris Princess Guard
Beatrix Save the Queen
Locke Morning Star
Barret Gatling Gun
Vivi Mace of Zeus
Cyan Tempest
Cid Venus Gospel
Quina Bistro Fork
Shadow Katana Ninja Stars
Sephy Masamune
Setzer Doom Darts Death Cards
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After a few test swings and fittings of their weapons, Steiner announced, "We should all pair up according to out skill set. In that way, we will be more effective attacking the villain in a larger force."
Vincent nodded solemnly, "Agreed. There are various types of training rooms throughout this wing. We should all train then reassemble again within 5 hours."
The warriors quickly dispersed each going to a training room with partners.
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In the end, our warrior were divided as follows:
Room
Warriors
Martial Arts Galore
Tifa, Sabin
Magic Metal
Celes, Terra
Aim Target (Long Range Throwing)
Barret, Vincent, Setzer, Shadow
Sword Fighting
Cloud, Sephy, Cyan, Beatrix, Steiner
Magic, magic, more magic
Dagger, Aeris, Vivi, Quina
Lances and Spears
Edgar, Cid
Thievery Skills
Locke, Zidane
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Tifa and Sabin fought with punch and kick combos, as well as throwing in some Blitzes and Limit Breakers. Terra and Celes alternated and combined the art of the sword while brushing up on some magic spells such as Ultima. In the Target Room, Barret, Vincent, Setzer, and Shadow aimed at bulls eyed targets, stationary and moving. In the sword arena, Cloud and Sephy matched each other fiercely testing their Limit Beakers, while Beatrix and Steiner trained intensely, Climhazzard versus Sword Skills. Cyan floated between the four warriors, even matching all four at once at times with his impressive Sword Techniques. Dagger and Aeris practice their healing powers, honing in on their inner strengths, while Vivi cast powerful black magic spells such as Flare. Quina, on the other hand, proved useful in both defensive and offensive magic with its Blue Magic abilities. Edgar and Cid (civilized vs. potty mouth) wielded their lances, striking each other close and long distances. Zidane and Locke swapped thievery skills, alternating between close combat fighting and stealing, to long distance throwing and reaches.
With lots of hard work, sweat, and insane exercises, moves, and chanting, the warriors reconvened 5 hours later. They were exhausted, but satisfied by the day's intense workout feeling a bit exhilarated by the rush of the fight that had been quiet for a while.
Cid took a long drag from his cigar and said, "Well? How's everything )(# going? This villain's will be hurtin' so # much when we're through that he'll have to # cry to is # mudder."
Locke stretched and replied, "Yeah, I echo Cid's colorful statement. I'm ready to get into a fight and crate some havoc. This villain will be so sorry he messed with any of us."
"Grrr!" Sabin growled. "Yeah, I'm so pumped right now. I'm ready to sink my fists into his ugly face! This training has really helped, I'll whip his butt in no time."
Tifa giggled and whispered to Setzer, "Whatever, not with the record he's holding…0-8.. with me leading by 8!"
Setzer chuckled appreciatively, "Ha ha… well, you have to appreciate Sabin's spunk and enthusiasm though."
Sabin continued with his fired speech, "With my new fighting prowess.. I have developed a new technique that will demolish my enemy…"
Tifa cocked her head to the side and murmured, "I haven't seen his new moves…"
"…BETWEEN THE CHEEKS OF MY BUTT!" Sabin finished. "Guys wanna see?" He asked excitedly undoing his belt.
Cyan shouted, "NOOO! Thouest gentlest ladies shall see Sir Sabin's posterior! Evacuate from thine's presence immediately!"
Everyone in shock and confusion said, "What? What? What?"
Shadow shrugged and said, "I dunno… don't look at me."
Cyan looked at his comrades in frustration and translation, "HAUL !"
Everyone let out an understanding "Oh" and quickly rushed out of the Battle Room faster than lightning. At that moment, Sabin finished unbuckling his belt and buttons and was about to demonstrate his new "move." He looked around and said, "Guys? Guys…?" Disappointed no one wanted to see his ultra cool—and rather disturbing—Blitz moves, Sabin pouted and fixed his pants, mumbling, "Hmph… no appreciation for the martial arts… it was a really awesome move. Where did they all go? Oh wellz, I guess I'll reserve my ultra-special move for the villain."
Sabin sulked in search of his friends, wondering why they ran off.
Author's Note: Whoa talk about unwanted exposure, sorry Sabin but the world is just NOT ready for that. Anywayz, so after a tough chapter, how about a nice sweet gentle one? Okie, my sis Tin has written a chapter called "A Tender Moment" See what a softie Mr. Sephy really is And what's on Terra's mind? Why is she so worried? So guyz, I cannot stress enough how much your reviews and comments me to us, so please read on and tell us what you think. Thank ya!