Burning Desire
Xx In the Present – Aoiya Dojo xX
"Aoshi-sama?" Misao spoke as the silence grew into agonizing minutes with Aoshi not gazing away from her pregnant belly. "Please, say something…" Misao forced her words out in a whisper. Aoshi's icy eyes finally rose to Misao's frightened blue orbs while his hand rested against Misao's belly. They were both still sitting on the wooden floorboards, neither having moved very far from the other.
"I'm going…to be a father?"
"Hai…"
"I know nothing about the role of a father." Aoshi responded, his hand jolting away from the slight kick against Misao's belly.
"As I a mother, but, do you think…maybe we could try?"
"Are you asking me to love you?" Misao felt a stab in her heart at the harshness with which he spat out those words to her. Bowing her head, Misao rubbed at her stomach.
"I'd never ask that of you Aoshi-sama. I do not deserve it from you. In truth I'm not really sure what I'm asking. I will plead with you to accept this child within me." Misao took in a deep breath continuing on. "I came back because I missed everyone here. I realised that while I was away, I missed the one place I called home and the people that lived here as they became the family I always wanted."
"What makes you think we can go back to the way things were before? You left us." 'You left me.' Aoshi silently added afterwards. His mind was screaming for him to show her no emotions, to show her she was not forgiven and to cast her away, but the tug in his heart, the place where Misao had begun to grow within was responding to her being right in front of him.
"I know… I cannot be forgiven for running away. My excuses for doing so aren't strong enough to warrant such forgiveness, especially from you Aoshi-sama." Misao clenched her hands as the stoic façade on Aoshi's face did not falter as she spoke. Bowing her head Misao looked to the floorboards trying to find answers there. "However, this was the only place I knew that I might be allowed in so I can have a safe delivery. I'm nearly dew after all. If you wish, no one needs to know about this, you can send me to a doctor to remain there until the child is born and I can leave for good, place him or her in your care if you demand it of me."
"Why would you ever think I'd pull a child away from their mother?" Misao flinched at his words once more. That was right; Aoshi really did have a soft spot for defenseless women and children. He after all was adopted into the Oniwabanshuu when he was found as an abandoned child.
"I'm sorry, it's just if you don't want anyone to know I'm carrying your child, I will keep that very secret to myself. Please Aoshi-sama, if you wish to reject someone, reject me and not this innocent inside of me."
"I reject no one!" Came the furious reply, Misao's eyes widening as she lifted her head. "I am far too weak." Misao listened to Aoshi murmur, observing as he leaned forward, his forehead resting against her bony shoulder.
"You are not weak Aoshi-sama. You are so strong…so very strong." Misao whispered into his ear watching as Aoshi shook his head against her.
"I am weak. I am weak when it comes to you." His words were strained, Misao's eyes tearing up at the feelings Aoshi was trying desperately to keep to himself. She gasped in pleasant and shocked surprise when arms pulled her effectively into another embrace. "Worry me like that again and even you might have to answer to my wrath. Emotions and I do not mix well, you already know this."
"Gomen nasai…" Misao sobbed once more, the comforting hand that she had thought would never stroke her back again was doing just that while the murmur of Aoshi's deep voice was fluttering into her ear.
"Why would you ever think I'd hurt or punish you with rejection Misao?"
"I'm glad I am just Misao to you again."
"Answer me." Aoshi demanded, pulling away to cup Misao's face, his gloved hands brushing away the tear streak marks.
"You took me in, began to trust me. Though at first you treated me with reserve and it was worse when you found out I was a Makimachi too, but you still allowed me to be with you. And then when we slept together on the night you were seriously wounded I…I ran away. I fled for I felt I tainted you. When I ran, I was too stupid to realise that as I left I was leaving behind the one person who I felt I could love and protect and they me. Now though, now I don't even know who I am anymore or where I stand with you."
"You are Makimachi Misao. You are the grand daughter of the late Okashira of the Oniwabanshuu. That is who you are. The Makimachi's are your blood kin, you cannot escape that fact." Aoshi responded instantly, feeling a slight tug in his heart when Misao professed her love to him.
"No, I suppose not, but even if you say I'm a Makimachi, I'll never ever be superior to you. I'm not leader material, I'm a woman and therefore I relinquish command to the one I believe is meant to be Okashira and that is you."
"You cannot make that decision on your own Misao."
"Well I'm sorry you feel that way but I've made my decision and that's final!" Misao snapped, but gasped as her hand flew to her stomach.
"What is wrong?" Their bickering ended for the moment as Aoshi forgot his usual sternness and instead worried for the woman in front of him.
"Argh, I feel like I'm being kenpo kicked. It's definitely your child Aoshi-sama." Misao couldn't help but brush her hand through Aoshi's long bangs. Her heart melted when Aoshi clasped her hand and held it to his cheek, his eyes closing off to her.
"I should hope so." Misao's breath caught in her throat at the possessiveness in Aoshi's eyes. Her heart lodged in her throat as she sat in a most ungraceful way, part of her kimono showing her leg as she supported herself with one hand, while Aoshi's head rested against her thigh, he lying on the dojo floor.
"It's quiet, where is everyone?" Misao voiced, her right hand brushing Aoshi's hair from his face before her eyes caught sight of a scar at the side of his neck.
"Working or patrolling I believe." Misao fingered the scar and felt Aoshi's hand clasp hers stopping her light touches from crazing his warm skin.
"I remember that wound very well." Misao muttered softly. "You got that protecting me for the first time, when an attack came upon the Aoiya." She continued on, eyes blinking rapidly to keep the tears at bay.
"You knew nothing of the Oniwabanshuu back then, but it was my duty to protect you for I had brought you to my home." Aoshi remarked softly. "If you had not have picked up my fallen kodachi and stabbed that man, his katana would have gone straight through my neck. I was foolish that night."
"You weren't foolish Aoshi-sama. I kept distracting you and that is why you became angry at me."
"That was the first time I had ever felt scared before. I thought you might have di-" Misao placed her finger against Aoshi's lips cutting him off from voicing a fear he couldn't suppress. It of course wouldn't be the last time Misao's life had come into danger. Aoshi had felt not only anger at Misao for not hiding like she was told to do but also to himself for not being there straight away to guard her from attackers. She had been injured and those small scars were constant reminders to Aoshi that he finally had a weak point that the enemy could use to their advantage if they ever got a hold of Misao.
"I'm here Aoshi-sama and this time I'll do everything you ask of me, if you allow me to remain by your side."
"I allow it." Aoshi whispered lowly and then he felt a presence walking towards the dojo, but refrained from moving.
When Misao felt Aoshi stiffen slightly, she lifted her eyes to see a shadow on the floorboards as she was facing the opened shoji. Misao's face lit up instantly at seeing a certain masked man standing there. Misao lifted her hand from Aoshi's hair to wave at her masked friend and Aoshi's subordinate. Hannya quietly waved back, but it wasn't long before he bowed to the two of them and then slid the shoji closed so the reunion would remain a personal one for Aoshi and Misao.
"Aoshi-sama, Hannya was just…"
"I know…" Aoshi muttered knowing his friend and comrade was there before he even made it to the shoji. "Do not keep doubting my skills Misao. I know many things before others do. You of all people should know that."
"Hai…" Misao whispered before leaning slightly over, lips against Aoshi's ear. "Ne Aoshi-sama, do you remember the first time we shared tea together?"
"Aa…"
Xx Begin Flashback xX
"Um, if it is alright with everyone, I'd like…to tell you something." Misao spoke quietly, breaking into Okina cackling as he had just finished telling a horrified Omasu a very perverted joke. The room fell silent as all eyes were on a fidgeting Misao.
"Hannya, you and I shall look over some papers for now." Aoshi remarked as he and Hannya stood from the low dining table.
"Shinomori-sama, you don't wish to hear what Misao-chan wants to say?" Okina voiced, but watched as the young man's eyes trailed to Misao's.
"No, it won't be necessary for either of us." The two quiet men left and headed upstairs.
Xx Aoshi's Study xX
"Is Misao-chan telling the others of her past?" Hannya spoke as he stood leaning against the wall near the open window.
"I believe so."
"Do you think they'll think less of her?"
"That is not my decision to make. We of the Oniwabanshuu all have our own opinions on certain matters. If they think poorly of her they will deal with it for Misao stays here until I find all the information I need to on her."
"I understand Okashira."
"Now Hannya, tell me truthfully, are your wounds fully healed?" Aoshi changed the subject in an instant as he gazed upon the first of four comrades he'd asked to come back to the Aoiya with him.
"No…"
"Then I as your leader…" Aoshi was sifting through folders while saying this. "…and your friend are placing you on light duties. Switch patrolling with Shiro or Kuro for now and tomorrow I want a full report from Kantaro-sensei about your injuries." Aoshi knew that Hannya respected what he spoke and would not talk back to him. With a slight bow of his head the masked ninja left the office and headed for his sleeping quarters.
Xx In the Hallway xX
"Ah, Hannya-kun konbanwa." Misao voiced happily, a cheery disposition in place. She was dressed plainly in a tanned yukata as she padded on light feet towards her room as she passed Hannya on her way there.
"I take it everything went well for you?" Misao blinked at his words then realised Aoshi must have told him about her past and she nodded her head quietly. "I am glad to hear it. Now if you'll excuse me I've been ordered to rest." With brows furrowed Misao placed her hand innocently and worriedly against Hannya's clothed chest.
"Are you sick Hannya-kun? Will you be alright?"
"I shall be fine with some rest. I plan to see a doctor as per Shinomori-sama's orders tomorrow morning."
"He must truly worry for you Hannya-kun. Is it nice?"
"Is what nice?"
"To have someone worry about you. I've never had that from anyone." Behind the mask was a slight smile that couldn't be detected.
"Don't be so sure about that Misao-chan." Hannya watched her smile grow as he called her 'chan'. "Now, do you think you could do me a small favour?"
"Anything you ask of me Hannya-kun."
"Could you bring tea to Shinomori-sama? He very much likes his tea."
"Hai, I'll just go grab him some right now." With that Hannya watched as Misao darted back downstairs and went to work. She was full of sweet innocence and brought sunshine and a bouncy energy that Hannya hoped would defrost the ice surrounding his leader these days. With his favour accepted by Misao, Hannya headed for the sleeping quarters he shared with Beshimi, Hyotokko and Shikijou.
Xx Back in Aoshi's Study xX
Aoshi was pondering over some papers when there was a slight knock on the shoji.
"What is it?" He spoke in his usual rich deep voice.
"Shinomori-sama, I brought tea as a favour for Hannya since he's sick." Aoshi's lips frowned at the voice behind the screen. Hannya had done what? Sighing lightly he mumbled an 'enter' knowing he very well couldn't turn the young girl away and watched as she quietly entered, not making a sound until the tray connected with the wooden desk. As Aoshi placed Oniwabanshuu business folders under Aoiya ones he accepted the tea from Misao and observed as she took up the seat beside the desk, sipping a cup of tea she had poured for herself.
"Thank you…" Icy eyes gazed through the gaps of black bangs as Aoshi sort out Misao's sparkling orbs and a light flush on her cheeks from the steam of having prepared tea…and maybe something else. "The others were shocked, but because I said you knew and hadn't thrown me out they to will think nothing of my past."
"That must make you happy."
"It does…" They fell silent, Misao gazing about the office before she caught a glimpse of an unusually large sheath positioned in a slightly darkened corner of the room. "Shinomori-sama, may I ask you a question?"
"If you must…"
"The way of the samurai is dying out is it not? Then why carry a katana with you?" Misao watched the downturn of Aoshi's lips, his eyes moving from hers to his weapons leaning against the far wall before returning back to her questioning gaze.
"My business is my own." Came the snappy reply and with that spoken Misao ducked her head, shame gracing her facial features. Aoshi quietly observed as she gathered up his empty tea cup and placed it back on the tray.
"I shall leave you be." Misao murmured and rose from her seated position as she headed for the shoji.
"You are an early riser are you not?" Aoshi questioned her, not sure where this sudden question had come from as he watched Misao turn her head over her shoulder to look back at him.
"I am if needs be."
"Be ready at 5, we are going on a trip."
"You mean us, as in you and I?" Misao repeated and watched Aoshi nod his head before waving his hand dismissing her from his office. Misao left then and headed off back downstairs all the while thoughts spilling in her mind as to what tomorrow would bring.
Xx End Flashback xX
"From what I can remember, I wasn't very nice at all." Aoshi spoke as he finally opened his eyes to look up at Misao.
"That was to be expected. Though your attitude didn't bother me too much, I was an outsider remember? Actually that trip we took into Kyoto was more frightening for me don't you think?"
"Mm, those bandits did not know who they were dealing, petty fools. I was lucky my ninja instincts told me to take my weapons with me."
"Mm I was placed in danger that day Aoshi-sama." Misao pouted down at Aoshi and watched as he sat up finally.
"You know I never meant to do so Misao. There were too many people in town to pin point who exactly was watching us. That is why I headed for the forest."
"Which happened to bring back bad memories for me."
"How was I supposed to know that Misao?" Aoshi had furrowed his brows and watched Misao's lips quirk slightly.
"We bicker quite a lot, don't we?"
"Aa…" Aoshi watched Misao rise to her feet, hands brushing down and straightening her kimono.
"Do you think we could catch up in your private quarters Aoshi-sama?" Misao watched his eyebrows rise as he lifted himself to his feet, his body towering over hers. "And not in any perverted way either. Don't make me think you've been hanging around Jiya too long." There was a quirk then, an almost smile which Misao craved to witness again.
"We shall reminisce at a later date as well as you telling me where you have been all this time. I had ninja's searching for you and even they couldn't find you. For now, Hannya will help sneak you inside so you can rest." Misao parted her lips; ready to defend she was perfectly fine. "I as your Okashira…" Misao's eyes grew wide at this as Aoshi was accepting the role of Okashira from her. "…and as a concerned man, though you tell anyone and I will have to discipline you, am ordering you to rest."
"Is your futon…my futon?" Misao shyly asked as she tried to look everywhere but into Aoshi's piercing gaze.
"I'll think about it." Came the quiet murmur and that was good enough for Misao as Aoshi snuck her towards the back of the Aoiya where Hannya had been miraculously patrolling.
"I am glad you are safe Misao-sama."
"Mou Hannya-kun, its Misao-chan remember?" With the slight nod the ninja distracted the two women inside and Aoshi took Misao upstairs, closing his shoji behind him.
"When you are well rested, I'll gather the others and tell them of your return." Aoshi remarked before turning around to see Misao had already laid out his futon and was just descending upon it now.
"I crave…this futon." Misao mumbled as her eyes closed. The strain this journey had done to her body and heart finally took its toll as she fell into a deep sleep.
"Nothing will harm you again Misao, I promise."
Xx To be continued xX