A/n:: yay. a review. Go reviews!
Chapter three l
Ariadne Chant::
I sit in Divination class; for once not glad the professor hasn't put us in groups. If that isn't a chance to apologize, I don't know what is. I haven't really had a chance to talk to Sirius at all, and I had discussed this with Ambrose, my friend, at lunch, about an hour before. She had suggested just cornering him while we passed on to our new class, but this is easier said than done. So I pass the class in deep thought as to how to corner Sirius. When the bell rings, I haven't thought of anything good. But as soon as I see him stand up and head for the door with his friends, I know that I have to do something or I will go mad. So I pick up my things as quickly as I can and rush to the exit. I try to overtake Sirius but I can't, not with all these people between him and me. So I slow to a walk and grunt in annoyance. I decide that I'll make up an excuse when I get to class as to why I was late. I take a sudden turn towards the bathroom, instead of to Herbology outside. I take a deep breath as I get to the bathroom. And immediately I cough. Our bathrooms don't smell any cleaner than Muggle ones. So I walk into the back and snap open a window. The cold, biting wind of outside makes me shiver, but it makes the awful smell go away. I sit there by the window, watching the people cross towards the greenhouses. I know Sirius is probably among them, but I don't want to search him out. One thought leads to another and I get an idea. I lean out the window I bit more to catch my last bit of clean air before I snap the window shut. I don't want to chance falling out the window. Then I grip my head in a tight grip and reach outside with my mind. I feel other minds pressing against mine, but I resist pulling myself towards them, and keep searching for a specific one. I begin to doubt myself, unsure if I can possibly even find him like this, without sight at all. But then I do. I don't know how I know it's him, I just do. I feel it in my very bones. So I close in on his mind, and wrap myself around it, loosely, making sure I can only just feel it pulsing beneath my own mind. Then I begin to understand the thoughts. "Boring. . .wonder if she. . .music's a good way. . .Prongs is such. . .still afterLily. . .Lily would show a bit of intelligence if she. . .let him get to her. . .gets a bit boring. . .should just kiss her and. . .over with." Then I decide to go to a level I never really tried before. I didn't decided before to do this, but now I can't back down. So I move in a little closer, seeing how close I can get before . . .well, before anything happens. And at last I feel a wall that I hadn't even known was there crash down. I true connection is formed and I can feel everything. As if I am Sirius Black. I feel the seat beneath me. The heat, even in mid winter, of the greenhouse. The dirt under my fingernails. The beating of my heart. I wonder if he feels the same things I feel. It doesn't take long for me to discover the answer. "Ariadne?" I feel the words in my head but I can almost feel myself thinking the words as well. I know their Sirius's words. "God, how is it that Ariadne is now even in my head? How did she get in-" I understand every thought he thinks. "You what?! No way." I do. "How? No, forget it. Get out! Who do you think you are, coming into my head uninvited? Leave!" I didn't mean to, really. I wanted to apologize and I guess I went too far- "Yeah. You did. LEAVE!" So I slip away from Sirius mind and the wall comes back up. I feel almost incomplete without our connection but I have little time to grieve of my loss. Almost as soon as I break away from Sirius, I pass out cold.
Sirius Black::
I feel her exit my head and I relax. I know I will have to ask her about this latest weirdness. How is it that she entered in my head? I look around the room to see where she's sitting, but to my surprise, she's not even in the room.
Surprise, surprise, I'm not really paying much attention to class and I totally mess up my assignment. I watch the professor mark down something that looks mysteriously like a zero. Plus he takes off about ten points total for my inattentiveness.
But she doesn't join us for a next class either, and I get worried. After this last class, I know I have to go look for her. But where to start?
I try to remember how I felt when I was in her head. Because where else would I have been? I think I had felt something hard and cold under me, which was probably what I had been sitting on. And it had smelled. Smelled like-
Like a bathroom.
Who would have guessed that the smell of a bathroom would have helped me? So the class ends, and not much better than the last one I must add, and I head to that floor's bathroom. But as soon as I enter through the door, I know I would not find her there.
She'll be in the girls' bathroom, and I know this, but I cannot stop myself from checking in the stalls anyway. I guess I'm stalling before I have to go and check the girls' bathroom.
An evil part of my head is asking why I even have to look for her in the first place. She enters my mind without my permission, then I'm expected to look after her? What kind of doofus am I? But the rest of my head knows that even if the world laughs at me forever, I will feel horrible if anything does happen to Ariadne.
So I'm standing in front of the door of the girls' bathroom and I gulp in discomfort. I finally gather my courage enough to enter the bathroom. It is thankfully empty, so I can search the stalls in peace. But, unfortunately, it's empty of her too, and I'm forced to check another bathroom.
And the next one is not so empty.
I hear the voices of the girls from outside the door, but I shut my eyes and rush through the door hurriedly. I realize that my entrance silences the girl's voices, but I don't stop. I push every stall door until I run into one that's locked. I look underneath the stall door and I see feet. I hear one of the girls ask me a question but I ignore them.
I knock on the door loudly but I receive no answer. So I, not liking my choices, crawl under the door, much to the girls' distaste as to mine. But I have found her. Her head is leaning against the corner protruding from wall, that connects to the window. Her breath is shallow, but I don't have much time to notice this. I try to pick her up the way you see guys pick girls up in movies, with one arm under her head and the other under her knees. But try doing that in a tight space like a bathroom stall. It's close to impossible.
So I decide to unlock the door and then try again. This time I'm a touch more successful. I have a bit more room, but I can't quite get Ariadne up completely. If you think I'm weak because of this, you try to carry Ariadne. So after a few tries I give it up and I just throw her over my shoulder and run. I feel her head bouncing on my back, but I don't care. Sure, it's selfish, but at that moment, I care more about getting out of there than of how comfortable she'll feel later. When I make it to the hall, I don't stop. I keep going and I don't stop until I can barely carry her anymore and I'm in the Hospital Wing.
Ariadne Chant::
I feel sore as I awake, and it takes me a good while to remember what happened. And as soon as I do, I wish I hadn't. What am I doing in the Hospital Wing, anyway? The last thing I remember is Sirius's mind, the pulsing beat of his heart, the heat of the Greenhouses, and the dirt under my fingers. But now I feel like me again, and I suddenly don't like me anymore.
So I take a couple deep breathes and send out my mind again. But it feels like I'm an old woman and every move my mind makes brings a sharp stab of pain into my head. But I continue on, into the GCR and I crawl in slowly, slithering through all the mind until I find the right one, sitting by the fire with his friends. I feel their minds and the vibrations, which mean they're talking. So I move in closer so that my mind makes a light contact with his.
I feel a bit of pain at the touch, but I quickly forget about it. But now hearing his thoughts like usual is no enough. I faintly hear random thoughts of his conversation, but I go in deeper. And for a second I feel bliss. I feel the blessed connection with him and his everything is in beat with mine-
But suddenly my head explodes with sharp pain that blinds me. I don't even realize I'm screaming until a feel the slap. I think I pass out for a little while because the next thing I remember is seeing a figure standing over me. Her face expresses a mix of worry and confusion.
"Are you alright?" she asks simply, but she doesn't wait to hear the answer. Instead she picks up her wand and rapidly verbalizes a spell. I feel my pounding headache numb slightly, but beside that I feel much the same as before. My muscles ache a little bit, but even that isn't that bad.
Then the woman pulls up a chair against my bed so that the chair bumps into the metal of the bed. The bed vibrates and my I bite my lip to prevent myself from calling out.
She doesn't apologize, but instead gets right to the point. "Are you currently taking any drugs, legal, or not?"
I know it'll hurt like hell to simply shake my head so I answer. "No." I might have said more if my head had allowed it.
Her expression doesn't alter and she stares me down, as if expecting me to tell her all my secrets. Well she can dream on. "Do you drink?"
I'm getting tired of the questions so I manage to answer in words. "What do you think?" I reply scathingly.
She doesn't answer, but continues asking as if I hadn't said a thing. I eventually stop responding to her questions. They get boring, very boring. I grip my head between my hands and try to block out all her words.
But she has a strong grip. My hands are forced down and she keeps them there. "Where were you? The boy came in, left you here, but he didn't explain how you got how you got. So the responsibility to explain falls on you." He? "So?" He came in, left me here and left? "He?" Her eyebrow raises and I can tell that she is surprised I don't know who he is. "Why, Sirius Black. Do you happen to know how he found you?" Her voice softens now that she sees that I might really not know much. "No, I don't." Maybe she sees I don't want to talk any more. Maybe she tires of me. But anyhow she simply tells me that I should rest a bit. Then I should gather my bag, which lies beside my bed, and go back to GCR. So I take her advice to heart. I sleep a bit later than I plan, but I have nothing else to do the entire day anyway. So I take my bag and wave a gentle goodbye to the occupied nurse. My head hurts a bit but I'm not about to let that be a big deal. As soon as I enter the GCR the music pounds in my head.
"How do you fight loneliness? You smile all the time."
I can't help grinning at the sight that meets my eyes. Remus dancing with a red head- then I stop. Because it's not just any red head. It's Lily. And watching her in Remus's arms. . .I don't know. Is it wrong to say it looks right?
"Shine your teeth 'till meaningless And sharpen them with lies. And whatever is going down Will follow you around It's how you fight loneliness You laugh at every joke You drag your blanket blindly And fill your heart with smoke,"
Throughout the entire song I watching them bounce on the souls of their feet. She smiles. He smiles. Almost puke-worthy, really. But for some reason I want to watch them enjoy themselves. It makes me almost feel like my head isn't about to implode and that I'm a spider with no figure.
"And the first thing that you want Will be the last thing you ever need That's how you-"
Then I see them. Remus and Lily see them too. They break apart and I see Remus trip over the record player and land hard on his back. I grimace, but I don't move from my place in the doorway. The magical record player continues playing, but Lily rapidly takes the record off. I don't see where she heads off to, but she leaves rather quickly. Not very nice of her, seeing as how Remus will have to explain for her. But either James saw nothing, or he wants to pretend he did. He saunters over to a Remus who has just gotten up and is dusting himself off, embarrassed. Sirius comes up behind James and passes Remus a record. "You need to bloody hear this!" He slides the record into record player and sets the spell back on. "James says his dad owned it. Found it in the attic. Beyond me how James hasn't found it before."
"When you're alone and life is making you lonely You can always go Downtown. When you've got worries all the noise and the hurry Seems to help I know Downtown-"
Remus kneels down and stops the music. I feel a twinge or regret, seeing as how I was liking the music. "Exactly what crap is this?" Sirius laughs wholeheartedly. "It's Petula Clark crap. Come on, listen to it. You listen to it long enough and you get to like it. Believe me." Remus shrugs and I can see that his mind is elsewhere. But I move slowly to sit down in the nearest armchair, to see how long I can pretend not to be listening.
"Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty How can you lose? The lights are much brighter there You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares And go Downtown! Things'll be great when you're Downtown! No finer place for sure."
And it takes me a moment to get my eyes to see the dancing in front of me. People aren't even pretending not to be paying attention anymore. They're dancing like crazy, and I watch James's eyes hunt through the crowd for Lily. But she's not part of the excitement. So I don't see Sirius, until he is standing right in front of me. "So, you got out." I frown. "What? You wanted me to miss all the fun?" I cross my arms slowly over my chest. "Look, why don't I cut to the chase?" he says suddenly and he seems nervous. "It was weird having you in my head. I don't know quite how you did what you did, but when you didn't show up for class, I had a feeling something was wrong. And I was right. So I found you in the bat-" I held up my hand. "Wait. Are you telling me that you went into a girls' bathroom?" The tips of my lips were heading up, but he only shakes his head. I place a hand on his arm, lightly. And I quickly takes it off. "Don't feel bad. You saved me, you can't feel that bad."
"Downtown! Everything's waiting for you. Don't hang around and let your problems-"
Chapter three l
Ariadne Chant::
I sit in Divination class; for once not glad the professor hasn't put us in groups. If that isn't a chance to apologize, I don't know what is. I haven't really had a chance to talk to Sirius at all, and I had discussed this with Ambrose, my friend, at lunch, about an hour before. She had suggested just cornering him while we passed on to our new class, but this is easier said than done. So I pass the class in deep thought as to how to corner Sirius. When the bell rings, I haven't thought of anything good. But as soon as I see him stand up and head for the door with his friends, I know that I have to do something or I will go mad. So I pick up my things as quickly as I can and rush to the exit. I try to overtake Sirius but I can't, not with all these people between him and me. So I slow to a walk and grunt in annoyance. I decide that I'll make up an excuse when I get to class as to why I was late. I take a sudden turn towards the bathroom, instead of to Herbology outside. I take a deep breath as I get to the bathroom. And immediately I cough. Our bathrooms don't smell any cleaner than Muggle ones. So I walk into the back and snap open a window. The cold, biting wind of outside makes me shiver, but it makes the awful smell go away. I sit there by the window, watching the people cross towards the greenhouses. I know Sirius is probably among them, but I don't want to search him out. One thought leads to another and I get an idea. I lean out the window I bit more to catch my last bit of clean air before I snap the window shut. I don't want to chance falling out the window. Then I grip my head in a tight grip and reach outside with my mind. I feel other minds pressing against mine, but I resist pulling myself towards them, and keep searching for a specific one. I begin to doubt myself, unsure if I can possibly even find him like this, without sight at all. But then I do. I don't know how I know it's him, I just do. I feel it in my very bones. So I close in on his mind, and wrap myself around it, loosely, making sure I can only just feel it pulsing beneath my own mind. Then I begin to understand the thoughts. "Boring. . .wonder if she. . .music's a good way. . .Prongs is such. . .still afterLily. . .Lily would show a bit of intelligence if she. . .let him get to her. . .gets a bit boring. . .should just kiss her and. . .over with." Then I decide to go to a level I never really tried before. I didn't decided before to do this, but now I can't back down. So I move in a little closer, seeing how close I can get before . . .well, before anything happens. And at last I feel a wall that I hadn't even known was there crash down. I true connection is formed and I can feel everything. As if I am Sirius Black. I feel the seat beneath me. The heat, even in mid winter, of the greenhouse. The dirt under my fingernails. The beating of my heart. I wonder if he feels the same things I feel. It doesn't take long for me to discover the answer. "Ariadne?" I feel the words in my head but I can almost feel myself thinking the words as well. I know their Sirius's words. "God, how is it that Ariadne is now even in my head? How did she get in-" I understand every thought he thinks. "You what?! No way." I do. "How? No, forget it. Get out! Who do you think you are, coming into my head uninvited? Leave!" I didn't mean to, really. I wanted to apologize and I guess I went too far- "Yeah. You did. LEAVE!" So I slip away from Sirius mind and the wall comes back up. I feel almost incomplete without our connection but I have little time to grieve of my loss. Almost as soon as I break away from Sirius, I pass out cold.
Sirius Black::
I feel her exit my head and I relax. I know I will have to ask her about this latest weirdness. How is it that she entered in my head? I look around the room to see where she's sitting, but to my surprise, she's not even in the room.
Surprise, surprise, I'm not really paying much attention to class and I totally mess up my assignment. I watch the professor mark down something that looks mysteriously like a zero. Plus he takes off about ten points total for my inattentiveness.
But she doesn't join us for a next class either, and I get worried. After this last class, I know I have to go look for her. But where to start?
I try to remember how I felt when I was in her head. Because where else would I have been? I think I had felt something hard and cold under me, which was probably what I had been sitting on. And it had smelled. Smelled like-
Like a bathroom.
Who would have guessed that the smell of a bathroom would have helped me? So the class ends, and not much better than the last one I must add, and I head to that floor's bathroom. But as soon as I enter through the door, I know I would not find her there.
She'll be in the girls' bathroom, and I know this, but I cannot stop myself from checking in the stalls anyway. I guess I'm stalling before I have to go and check the girls' bathroom.
An evil part of my head is asking why I even have to look for her in the first place. She enters my mind without my permission, then I'm expected to look after her? What kind of doofus am I? But the rest of my head knows that even if the world laughs at me forever, I will feel horrible if anything does happen to Ariadne.
So I'm standing in front of the door of the girls' bathroom and I gulp in discomfort. I finally gather my courage enough to enter the bathroom. It is thankfully empty, so I can search the stalls in peace. But, unfortunately, it's empty of her too, and I'm forced to check another bathroom.
And the next one is not so empty.
I hear the voices of the girls from outside the door, but I shut my eyes and rush through the door hurriedly. I realize that my entrance silences the girl's voices, but I don't stop. I push every stall door until I run into one that's locked. I look underneath the stall door and I see feet. I hear one of the girls ask me a question but I ignore them.
I knock on the door loudly but I receive no answer. So I, not liking my choices, crawl under the door, much to the girls' distaste as to mine. But I have found her. Her head is leaning against the corner protruding from wall, that connects to the window. Her breath is shallow, but I don't have much time to notice this. I try to pick her up the way you see guys pick girls up in movies, with one arm under her head and the other under her knees. But try doing that in a tight space like a bathroom stall. It's close to impossible.
So I decide to unlock the door and then try again. This time I'm a touch more successful. I have a bit more room, but I can't quite get Ariadne up completely. If you think I'm weak because of this, you try to carry Ariadne. So after a few tries I give it up and I just throw her over my shoulder and run. I feel her head bouncing on my back, but I don't care. Sure, it's selfish, but at that moment, I care more about getting out of there than of how comfortable she'll feel later. When I make it to the hall, I don't stop. I keep going and I don't stop until I can barely carry her anymore and I'm in the Hospital Wing.
Ariadne Chant::
I feel sore as I awake, and it takes me a good while to remember what happened. And as soon as I do, I wish I hadn't. What am I doing in the Hospital Wing, anyway? The last thing I remember is Sirius's mind, the pulsing beat of his heart, the heat of the Greenhouses, and the dirt under my fingers. But now I feel like me again, and I suddenly don't like me anymore.
So I take a couple deep breathes and send out my mind again. But it feels like I'm an old woman and every move my mind makes brings a sharp stab of pain into my head. But I continue on, into the GCR and I crawl in slowly, slithering through all the mind until I find the right one, sitting by the fire with his friends. I feel their minds and the vibrations, which mean they're talking. So I move in closer so that my mind makes a light contact with his.
I feel a bit of pain at the touch, but I quickly forget about it. But now hearing his thoughts like usual is no enough. I faintly hear random thoughts of his conversation, but I go in deeper. And for a second I feel bliss. I feel the blessed connection with him and his everything is in beat with mine-
But suddenly my head explodes with sharp pain that blinds me. I don't even realize I'm screaming until a feel the slap. I think I pass out for a little while because the next thing I remember is seeing a figure standing over me. Her face expresses a mix of worry and confusion.
"Are you alright?" she asks simply, but she doesn't wait to hear the answer. Instead she picks up her wand and rapidly verbalizes a spell. I feel my pounding headache numb slightly, but beside that I feel much the same as before. My muscles ache a little bit, but even that isn't that bad.
Then the woman pulls up a chair against my bed so that the chair bumps into the metal of the bed. The bed vibrates and my I bite my lip to prevent myself from calling out.
She doesn't apologize, but instead gets right to the point. "Are you currently taking any drugs, legal, or not?"
I know it'll hurt like hell to simply shake my head so I answer. "No." I might have said more if my head had allowed it.
Her expression doesn't alter and she stares me down, as if expecting me to tell her all my secrets. Well she can dream on. "Do you drink?"
I'm getting tired of the questions so I manage to answer in words. "What do you think?" I reply scathingly.
She doesn't answer, but continues asking as if I hadn't said a thing. I eventually stop responding to her questions. They get boring, very boring. I grip my head between my hands and try to block out all her words.
But she has a strong grip. My hands are forced down and she keeps them there. "Where were you? The boy came in, left you here, but he didn't explain how you got how you got. So the responsibility to explain falls on you." He? "So?" He came in, left me here and left? "He?" Her eyebrow raises and I can tell that she is surprised I don't know who he is. "Why, Sirius Black. Do you happen to know how he found you?" Her voice softens now that she sees that I might really not know much. "No, I don't." Maybe she sees I don't want to talk any more. Maybe she tires of me. But anyhow she simply tells me that I should rest a bit. Then I should gather my bag, which lies beside my bed, and go back to GCR. So I take her advice to heart. I sleep a bit later than I plan, but I have nothing else to do the entire day anyway. So I take my bag and wave a gentle goodbye to the occupied nurse. My head hurts a bit but I'm not about to let that be a big deal. As soon as I enter the GCR the music pounds in my head.
"How do you fight loneliness? You smile all the time."
I can't help grinning at the sight that meets my eyes. Remus dancing with a red head- then I stop. Because it's not just any red head. It's Lily. And watching her in Remus's arms. . .I don't know. Is it wrong to say it looks right?
"Shine your teeth 'till meaningless And sharpen them with lies. And whatever is going down Will follow you around It's how you fight loneliness You laugh at every joke You drag your blanket blindly And fill your heart with smoke,"
Throughout the entire song I watching them bounce on the souls of their feet. She smiles. He smiles. Almost puke-worthy, really. But for some reason I want to watch them enjoy themselves. It makes me almost feel like my head isn't about to implode and that I'm a spider with no figure.
"And the first thing that you want Will be the last thing you ever need That's how you-"
Then I see them. Remus and Lily see them too. They break apart and I see Remus trip over the record player and land hard on his back. I grimace, but I don't move from my place in the doorway. The magical record player continues playing, but Lily rapidly takes the record off. I don't see where she heads off to, but she leaves rather quickly. Not very nice of her, seeing as how Remus will have to explain for her. But either James saw nothing, or he wants to pretend he did. He saunters over to a Remus who has just gotten up and is dusting himself off, embarrassed. Sirius comes up behind James and passes Remus a record. "You need to bloody hear this!" He slides the record into record player and sets the spell back on. "James says his dad owned it. Found it in the attic. Beyond me how James hasn't found it before."
"When you're alone and life is making you lonely You can always go Downtown. When you've got worries all the noise and the hurry Seems to help I know Downtown-"
Remus kneels down and stops the music. I feel a twinge or regret, seeing as how I was liking the music. "Exactly what crap is this?" Sirius laughs wholeheartedly. "It's Petula Clark crap. Come on, listen to it. You listen to it long enough and you get to like it. Believe me." Remus shrugs and I can see that his mind is elsewhere. But I move slowly to sit down in the nearest armchair, to see how long I can pretend not to be listening.
"Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty How can you lose? The lights are much brighter there You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares And go Downtown! Things'll be great when you're Downtown! No finer place for sure."
And it takes me a moment to get my eyes to see the dancing in front of me. People aren't even pretending not to be paying attention anymore. They're dancing like crazy, and I watch James's eyes hunt through the crowd for Lily. But she's not part of the excitement. So I don't see Sirius, until he is standing right in front of me. "So, you got out." I frown. "What? You wanted me to miss all the fun?" I cross my arms slowly over my chest. "Look, why don't I cut to the chase?" he says suddenly and he seems nervous. "It was weird having you in my head. I don't know quite how you did what you did, but when you didn't show up for class, I had a feeling something was wrong. And I was right. So I found you in the bat-" I held up my hand. "Wait. Are you telling me that you went into a girls' bathroom?" The tips of my lips were heading up, but he only shakes his head. I place a hand on his arm, lightly. And I quickly takes it off. "Don't feel bad. You saved me, you can't feel that bad."
"Downtown! Everything's waiting for you. Don't hang around and let your problems-"