Guide: Italic letters are thoughts.
Final CHPT: Healing.
Sanzo: Goku fetch me some soap I'm out. (yells from inside the bathroom)
Goku pacing around outside of the bathroom door
Goku: Should I or shouldn't I…I should. (Grabs the door knob) …but he's going to kill me…(gulps)
Bathroom doors swings open, showing a grumpy blond wearing a white bathing robe and Goku jumps back a good two feet
Sanzo: STUPID MONKEY! Didn't you hear me?
Goku: I was just getting that (gulps again) now.
Goku aims for Sanzo's bag and takes out a bar of Luxe handling it quickly to his guardian as the door slams
Goku: (sighs in desperation) I can't do it. But I must.
Goku takes out two small but firm chains Gojyo and Hakkai had bought him the day before and places the key in his pocket
Goku: Let's see. Gojyo told me to tie Sanzo's hand behind him and his feet together. (Sweats) I hope I could do this…but I really don't want to tackling him down.
Bathroom door opens, a naked Sanzo in the bubbly bath tub
Sanzo: What the hell do you think you're doing.
Cling, Cling
Sanzo: What's that noise behind you.
Goku: (sweating into a pool) Na Sanzo I must help you.
Twitch Twitch
Sanzo: The hell are you talking about!
Goku: So…hmm…just relax-k? (nervous as hell)
Sanzo: How can I relax with you standing there like an idiot, get ou-
Cling, clung, yanks, pulls, shoves, kick, water splash, lock
Door to their bedroom opens and two amused character tip-toe in the room quietly to stand behind the barthroom door, eavesdropping
Hakkai: (whispers) Gojyo I'm beginning to doubt this.
Gojyo: (whispers back) Oh-hush and let me enjoy this…tee-hee-hee
Inside bathroom
Sanzo: STUPID MONKEY! UNTIE ME NOW OR I SWEAR YOU WON'T LIVE PAST YOUR NEXT MEAL!
Goku: I'm sorry Sanzo but I must do this for your own good.
Sanzo sweat drops, clueless
Goku: Now just let me wash you.
Sanzo face's turns blue
Sanzo: You little snot when I get my hands on you, you're as good as dead. (clenches his teeth)
Goku: You can kill me later. Now…hmm…where did I put that clock?
Sanzo: Clock? (blinks dumbfounded)
Goku: Oh there it is. Ok now time for wash up.
Sanzo: What the-Get your hands off me Bakasaru!
Outside
Gojyo: What did I tell you Hakkai, hehehe, this getting good.
Hakkai: We're so dead and what's worst I agreed on this.
Gojyo: Baaah, you know you wanted to see Sanzo-sama as we've never seen him before.
Hakkai: (grins) Hai but I never imagine it would be this way.
Gojyo: Too late to pull that monkey out now.
Hakkai: Or we could pull him out now and run for our lives.
Gojyo: No way. We'll run later, this is getting interesting.
Inside
Goku: If you stop wiggling around this task would be much more easier to do.
Sanzo: Oh excuse me for not being cooperative when I'm being chained against my own will.
Goku: (shakes his head) I have to wash you for five full hours. It's important.
Sanzo: WHAAAATTT!
Goku: Now stop moving.
Sanzo: (flinches as Goku's hand strokes from his toes up to his thighs) Damn little demon! (starts wiggling again) Damn stupid chains! Goku you're going to have the funeral of all times!
Goku: Stop complaining. You'll thank me later.
Sanzo: WHAAAATTT!
Goku: Now you need to spread your legs so I can wash in between.
Sanzo's face turns deadly and if looks could kill this one would
Sanzo: tell me again how I'm suppose to do that when you oh I don't know…TIED MY FEET TOGETHER STUPID FREAKING IDIOT WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU TODAY DID YOU FALL ON YOUR HEAD THIS MORNING OR EAT SOME POISONOUS FOOD HOLDING THE LABEL DUMBASS ON IT UNTIE ME NOW!
Goku: (gulps) If I let him loose he'll kill me and die. If I don't let him loose he'll kill me later and live. Sorry I can't do that yet Sanzo…there's four hours and fifty minutes left to go. But how to go about washing in between his tighs?
Goku ponders suddenly star strikes
Goku: Ok now I'm just going to have to squeeze my way in between then
Outside
Gojyo's hand over his mouth to stop himself from barking out laughing while Hakkai sweats drop uncomfortably
Hakkai: Oh my…forget being dead. I think buried alive sounds more like it
Gojyo: Sssh…or they'll hear us.
Inside
Sanzo: Damn you….(sentence cut off when Goku's hand fondles between his clasp thighs)
Goku: You don't have to be tense you know, feels like my hand is being squished.
Sanzo:Easy for you to say stupi-(a groan escapes him as Goku's fingers had accidentally rub his genital member and he quivers)…sstop that now.
Goku: I'm going to scrub your half bottom for two and a half hours and your top half for the other remaining two and a half.
Sanzo: TCH! I don't know-(another groan this time only softer)…what got you-(let's a suppressed breath out)…to behave this-BAKA!
Goku had now both hand in between Sanzo's legs scrubbing on each side of inner thighs up and then the most shocking part came
Sanzo: Stupid meat bun inhaler take your hands of m-
Outside
Gojyo: Tee-he-he…oooh man too bad I don't have a recorder.
Hakkai: How does being burned alive sounds to you?
Inside
Sanzo: Stupid, stupid monkey. Is he even aware of what he's doing to me…
Goku: Hmm…this would be my first time washing a man not that I've wash a woman before either but I don't see where the difference lies.
Sanzo: Of course you wouldn't you idiot…you weren't born with a brain…
Goku: Na Sanzo why are you so silent now?
Sanzo: How can I not be…your damn hands are stroking where they're not supposed to…
Goku: It's not the diseases acting up is it? (eyes filled with worries)
Sanzo: What the hell is it with this monkey…and why is on the verge of crying into a pool…
Goku: Say something Sanzo. (hands gripping even tighter on you know what part)
Sanzo: (groans loudly)…Take-(he chocks a breath out)…hand off.
Goku: Eh? Hmm…ok.
Sanzo: (breaths normally again and stares silently at Goku) "…"
Goku: Sanzo?
Sanzo: "…"
Goku: (press a hand against Sanzo's forehead checking body temperature) You don't seem to have a fever.
Sanzo: "…"
Goku: Sanzoo? Why are you staring at me like that?
Sanzo: "…"
Goku: I think I should get Ha-
Sanzo: Goku.
Goku:Yes.
Sanzo: Untie me. (spoke in his most gentle tone ever)
Goku: But then you won't let me wash you.
Sanzo: I won't hold back. I'm beginning to understand what you're doing.
Goku: Ah really? (Grins widely) Ok then but promise not to break your word.
Sanzo: Oh don't worry I won't. You'll see little brat...
Goku: Alright here we go.
Click, Clack, Clock, Chains came off, a very still sanzo sat unmoving in his bubbly bath tub
Goku: Ok now I'll continue.
Swoooshsss!
Goku: (gags) San-zo (found himself pin on the wet floor Sanzo toping over him)
Sanzo: Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill youthis very minute. I was thinking of starting with your oversized stomach. Shall I carve it out so you can no longer eat? Or should I place a bullet in your empty skull first. Maybe doing both at the same time, no?
Goku: San-zoo…that's so mean of you. I was just trying to…(and then it came, the flowing tears and then the loud sobbing and then the puppy adorable cursed golden eyes and then-)…why are you so mad. I just don't want you to die from PMS disease.
Sanzo: Good lord of all heaven…now I get it. Those two will pay later but first things' first…Well for one thing I'm not dying anytime soon, secondly I've already told you men don't have PMS and I don't PMS, only women have it because it's needed for their bodies to be able to bare children. The third being that I'll stay true to my words.
Goku: (sobbing stops) Eh? Then this whole time…but they…waah I don't get it…so PMS is not a diseasee?
Sanzo: No. But you can be sure that once I'm done with them there won't be a cure around.
Outside
Hakkai: I told you.
Gojyo: Ah shit. It didn't even get to the good part yet.
Both slowly tip-toed out of the room as silently as they could
Hakkai: Now shall I go dig our graves?
Gojyo: Make mine a twin size coffin.
Hakkai: Ah?
Gojyo: I plan on lying next to a beautiful face.
Hakkai: Like any sane normal woman's going to be willing to be your partner in death.
Gojyo: Who's talking about a woman. I simply meant you.
Hakkai: (chuckles) Should have seen that coming.
Inside
Goku: So Hakkai and Gojyo were just lying to me.
Sanzo: Again, like always, as usual, for who knows how many times now but you never seem to learn.
Goku: (grins stupidly) Hehehe…sumimasen. Now then since it's settle I feel much better, ok you can get off me now.
Sanzo: You forget the third, monkey.
Goku: Eh? The third of what?
Sanzo: You asked me not to break my word.
Goku: I don't get it.
Sanzo: I told you that I won't hold back.
Goku: Oh that but since it's already settle and it was all a bad joke then I don't have to wash you anymore.
Sanzo: Who's talking about washing me. I meant I won't hold back so I won't hold back.
Goku: I still don't get it.
Sanzo: You're about to get it. (stares down at Goku with evil predatory eyes)
Goku: (gulps) Errr…San-zo?
The next day on the road
Gojyo and Hakkai were seen driving out of town with their bodies being bandaged from head to toe resulting in Sanzo being the designated driver until Hakkai heals while Goku was seen to stand during the entire drive until they got to a next town, oh let's say…about two day's ride away from the one they just left.
What happened to those three? It's a secret. Tee-hee-hee
Voila done. Longest CHPT.