Forbidden Fantasy: Soulmates

Fantasy's Flight

By: NemesisStrife

Disclaimer: These Final Fantasy 7 characters are property of Squaresoft. This is an Alternate Universe epic saga pre-game fanfiction. As stated before, this is a Cloud and Sephiroth pairing, involving shounen-ai, and it is my take on what should have happened in the game. Respect my opinions, please.

NOTES: People, since the server now has a new format, please check for my story under "Sort By Update (Chaptered)", please. I hope you know what to do...keep on reading, and Review please. If you want the next chapter up soon, well, Leave Feedback.

Warnings for this chapter

1) Apologies are due to all you (im)patient people out there, after a wait of about 3? 4? months, I'm FINALLY updating. I'm ever so sorry, I had exams to study for, which took up the time until October. THEN I went on holiday and slacked. sheepish grin If you can still remember the gist of the story, I'll have to give you credit, even I sort-of forgot some of the details along the way. I wonder if everyone gave up on the idea of me continuing the fic…

2) Let's see… um… guess what? If you thought I'd finally end the day with the last chapter, you're mistaken… I'm STILL on the same day as about 5 1/2 chapters ago. And then I still have to write about the night. The time seems to drag on forever…

3) As stated before, I am an anti-Tifa person, so am warning all those Tifa&Cloud lovers out there. But if you are a pro-Tifa&Cloud person, what are you doing reading a yaoi fiction, anyway? In this chapter I indulge in rather nasty, (but still intelligent) comments about her, so if you think you'll be offended, please skip that part. I will not mindlessly character-bash, I just throw in derogatory terms, etc, but I really do feel that that is how the character acts. So sue me for having an opinion.

4) Thanks again for waiting! You'll see whether it was worth it, although I doubt it. I got rather melodramatic along the way, (hopefully I didn't go overboard) and the one who had to bear the brunt of it was Reno… so if he sounds like he's suddenly spouts poetry, please forgive me. On with the show.

" " Normal speech

' ' Thoughts

italics Emphasis

Mental speech/ Telepathy

// Flashback

Chapter 8

Confrontation Revisited

Making their way to the dining hall, Cloud and Reno were hurrying, almost running, in their haste to catch up with the rest of the group, so they would arrive on time. Cloud turned his head slightly, enough to flash Reno a rather sheepish and apologetic grin, before continuing his fast pace. "I can't believe I fell asleep as well," Reno muttered, softly chiding himself. After Cloud had fallen asleep on his shoulder, he had been unable to resist the pull of unconsciousness, and to his chagrin and in spite of his valiant attempts to stay awake, had followed his friend quickly into dreamland. Both of them had only woken up near evening, the afternoon sun just minutes away from setting. A quick glance at his watch revealed that it was past 7 p.m., and they were already 5 minutes late. Suppressing the urge to vent his frustration in pointless swearing, he matched strides with Cloud until they reached the welcome safety of the hall.

'Thank goodness no one caught us sneaking in,' Cloud thought gratefully. Making his way to an unoccupied table, with a tray of food, he left a seat on the bench for Reno to join him, after his friend managed to weave through the packed room. Turning his attention to the meal, he carefully examined the individual items that had somehow merged into a colourful mess on his plate. "I give up. I can't recognise anything on my tray," Cloud remarked ruefully.

"Um… well, maybe you don't want to," Raven answered, from his left, "just close your eyes, take a deep breath, and eat."

"Ignore him. It's not that bad. Just avoid that sticky goo," Damien advised, eyeing the congealed, custard-like, brownish, semi-liquid stuff in the bowl. Obeying the friendly and helpful advice, Cloud started on his meal, purposely avoiding the so-called dessert. To his surprise, it was pretty good, at least edible, with the food still fresh and hot, even if it was bland. He suppressed a grin as he noticed Reno liberally adding in salt over the entire portion, even on the dessert.

"It's not like I'm going to eat it anyway," Reno said defensively, pushing the offending mud-coloured muck off his tray. The rest of the meal was passed in silence, the recruits just realising now how truly hungry they were.

Conversation resumed shortly, once the majority had finished eating, the noise level in the cafeteria rising again, a steady hum of chatter, broken only now and then by laughter. The discussion was mainly about the mission at Kalm, and Cloud was relieved that it did not turn back to the afternoon's topic, none of them resuming the relentless questioning. 'Perhaps they are deliberately avoiding the subject? No matter what the reason, as long as they do, I don't mind.'

He was content to distance himself from the speculation, the heated babble of voices, and be a passive observer, the way he was used to being back at Nibelheim, an objective listener not drawn into the arguments, hovering on the edges. Unlike home, however, he could choose to join in, and have his words taken seriously, not forced into adopting that aloof stance out of a desire to protect himself. Relaxed, he found it easier to let his consciousness drift, in a state of almost heightened awareness. 'Might as well see if I can use that new sense again, or if this afternoon, as well as the day before, was just a fluke.'

If he concentrated hard, he could distinguish roughly where the words were coming from, even over the din of the dining hall, and although it should be practically impossible to make out distinct voices, it was all audible to him. Several rows of tables down, Cloud could hear a group of Second and Third-Class SOLDIERs nosily making bets on the results of the B Class Chocobo Races at the Gold Saucer. 'Betting 1000 gil on Chocobos? These guys are insane!'

Shaking his head slightly, he decided to stop eavesdropping, physically, mentally, or otherwise. 'Better rest. The conversation there is… well, informative, but not particularly intelligent. 'Sides, I have had enough for the day… my head hurts. It isn't quite reading their thoughts, not like this afternoon… more like enhancing a physical sense or utilising another natural ability.'

After the initial shock of being able to overhear dialogue three tables down had worn off, he now was rather enjoying trying to control this new skill, using it to merely improve an already existing sense, allowing him to pick out sounds that were just out of range. The limit to the mental enhancement of his ears was to extend the distance over which he could hear normally by one to two metres. 'It's useful, and practical to learn how to maximise this. Sort of a practice for the Mako treatments boosting a SOLDIER's talents… I'll be able to get used to the changes later, if I learn to cope with this now.'

Cloud closed his eyes as he remembered the other side of this new skill, 'the hearing increase is fine… But the other part… I don't want to be able to see into other's minds, having someone else's thoughts intruding on mine… it's too unnerving. I don't want to know what they're thinking, don't want that unwelcome information… And I can't control it, it just happens and I can't stop it.'

He had never asked for it, never wanted to be saddled with the burden, for burden it was, of mindreading. 'If that was just a minor example this afternoon… I'd hate to be omniscient.' Somewhere at the back of his mind, he wondered how he could keep that bleak sense of humour even when troubled. Breath escaping in a quick exhalation that wasn't quite a sigh, he turned back to the remains of the meal, carefully avoiding meeting Allan's eyes. 'Don't want to see him… face the reality of disturbing awe-fear-envy again. Maybe if I don't make any eye contact it won't happen… I don't want to be forced into that distasteful one-sided… intimacy of knowing exactly what someone else thinks or feels. I have enough trouble with my own mind, to say nothing of having to deal with someone else's emotions.'

Looking up, attention caught by a bright flash of metallic-grey, he was amused to notice Reno absently picking up both the pepper and salt-shakers, and proceeding to cover his food with another layer of salt and pepper. Seized by a sudden mischievous impulse, Cloud discreetly moved the container of sugar nearer his friend's hand, and had to suppress a smile when Reno added that as well into the dessert bowl.

"Hmm… so, Cloud, what do you think about sneaking in the laundry and switching the detergent with bright green dye on April Fools' Day?" Raven asked.

"Too immature," Damien replied through a mouth of food.

"Tying all their shoelaces together?"

"No, that's too over-used," Damien countered.

"Glue their bags to the floor?"

"Nope," Damien shook his head, dismissing another of Raven's suggestions.

"You're awfully fussy. Can't you ever agree on something?" Raven complained in exasperation.

From the other table, Skye yelled over, "Damien's always like that. You can never get him to admit that someone other than himself ever came up with a good idea." A heated argument soon followed, with insults, taunts and agitated accusations hurled by both parties.

"Juvenile. Trading insults like children," Cloud remarked lazily, rolling his eyes at the light-hearted banter.

"Hey! What was that again, huh?" Raven turned to mock-angrily glare at Cloud.

"I said juvenile. Children. Immature. Babies. Infants," Cloud drawled, deliberately stating the words slowly and clearly, a slight smirk on his face. Whatever outraged response Raven might have made to the provoking comments would be forever lost, as at that moment, another situation emerged.

"Aaarrrgghhh!" The loud bellow echoed throughout the room, disturbing the normal flow of conversation, and everyone simultaneously stopped to stare. Damien's chair toppled and hit the ground with a resounding "thud". The shocked silence that followed was eerie, with the entire hall of over five hundred SOLDIERs and recruits stunned into absolute quiet. It was an unnatural, hushed sort of dead silence, and one could literally hear a pin drop. It was broken by a confused scramble on the parts of the recruits sitting at the tables nearest him, as chairs and benches were pushed aside in a mad rush to get to the scene. Reno was the closest, and was bending over Damien in concern. The initial yelling had subsided into coughing and gasping.

"He's choking. Someone perform the Heimlich manoeuvre." Cloud stated clinically, and helped Reno to right the chair, gently supporting Damien in a sitting position. Damien shook his head in negation, swallowed hard and made a disgusted face. Cloud stood up, puzzled, wondering at the strange cause of the sudden accident. His eyes alighted on the table, skimming past to Damien's seat. As if drawn by some invisible magnet, his gaze was inevitably pulled to a certain plastic bowl, with the familiar brown dessert in it. 'No… Wait. Damien sits next to…' His glance slid to meet Reno's, eyes widening in startled recognition, and he saw the understanding dawn on his friend's face. Trying vainly to fight a smile, to keep his mouth set in that grim line of sternness, Cloud turned away to hide the beginnings of laughter. Reno's grey eyes sparkled, and his shoulder's shook in silent mirth.

"I've been poisoned!" Damien declared indignantly. This only sparked off the helpless laughter of the two, as they were unable to control themselves at the mixed look of outrage and disgust on their friend's face. Schooling his expression into a more serious look befitting the occasion, Cloud gravely explained about the mix-up of bowls, and the unfortunate encounter with the salted, peppered and sugared mixture. The hall's commotion soon abated, with only a few audible snickers at Damien's expense. Finally, he retreated from the teasing and hilarity of his fellow recruits, and left to take refuge in the sanctity of his room.

"He's probably hiding under the bed and sulking," Reno remarked to no one in particular. The SOLDIERs had all left the hall, leaving the recruits to occupy the entire space, so it seemed suddenly a strangely empty place, with the echoes of the previous different voices fading slowly away. Cloud sighed and nodded, tilting his head to casually look at the remaining people in the hall. Never focusing on any one point attention wandering, until he saw them. Instantly tensing, almost frozen to the spot, Cloud debated on the possibility of making a dash for the exit.

'Damn, I didn't expect him to recover so quickly. They probably cast a Cure spell on him.' He deliberately forced his locked muscles to relax, not allowing any trace of fear or nervousness to show. His mind, however, was projecting a far different emotion than what he let show on his outward appearance, thoughts running in confused, little frenzied circles, screaming 'back… He's back with his friends!'

"Hey," Reno whispered softly in Cloud's ear, "calm down. Just because Erek and his cronies are here again doesn't mean that they'll do anything."

"You don't know them Reno… you haven't lived in fear of them for your entire childhood. He'll want revenge. Erek will be more wary and less over-confident, since I managed to beat him that one time. He's… they all are used to seeing me as weaker, just a victim, helpless, not able to fight back, completely vulnerable…" Cloud's voice trailed off with a slight gasp at the end, a ragged intake of breath. Reno noticed with some alarm that his friend was clearly disturbed, lower lip bitten in a dark semicircle, nearly drawing blood.

"It's okay. You wiped the floor with his ass before, remember?" he said reassuringly.

"No… You don't understand. Now he won't make the same mistake again. He won't try to fight one-on-one with me. This time it'll be the whole gang…" Cloud closed his eyes, trying to bring back the icy calm he had felt before the last fight, but so far, it was unsuccessful.

'What I'm afraid is that it'll go too far… he'll kill me. Or I might kill him. I don't know which would be worse…' He didn't realise he was twisting his hands together, compulsive hand-wringing, nails digging into his own skin, until Reno leaned over and clasped his hands firmly, tightly gripping the wrists to render Cloud's hands immobile.

"Sorry," Cloud said, shamefacedly, and Reno rubbed his palm against the backs of Cloud's hands soothingly before releasing his hold. 'Like Seph…' was the irrelevant connection, linking this action to the past. 'Sephiroth…' Just the thought of that name restored a measure of peace, allowed him to strengthen the tenuous grip he had on maintaining outward calm. 'He believes in me…perhaps the only one who really does, aside from Mom, and maybe Reno… I will not let him down.' Cloud straightened his shoulders, head snapping up to meet Erek's eyes, in a glare of pure defiance and fearlessness.

'That's the real Cloud.' Reno smiled inwardly, knowing his friend had won the internal battle, and would probably win the external fight as well. His gaze flickered over to the other recruits, to narrowed eyes of Erek Mollina and Johnny. They were frowning, obviously unnerved by the apparent indifference of their focus of revenge, disappointed that it was not going to be easy intimidating Cloud. After a hurriedly whispered conference, they stood, pushing aside their chairs, deliberately heading towards Cloud and Reno's table.

'I beat him once… I can do it again,' Cloud thought, feeling the fear dissipate, flowing off and draining from his mind, leaving it clear and emptied of all distracting emotion. It was strange… how one could be reduced to a terrified bundle of nerves, living in constant fear… and then when in a real confrontation, merely feel an objective, distant detachment. 'When you face up to your fears they do disappear…'

Cloud turned and nodded to Reno, an unspoken message of gratitude and support passing between them. He nonchalantly waited until they were standing directly behind him, so the dark shadows overlapped and covered over a significant portion of the table, then stood, in one graceful, unhurried movement. Anyone watching would have been struck by the contrast, amidst the dark, rough features and bulky builds of the Nibelheim "gang", Cloud was a blazing, gold beacon of light. Slender, delicate, almost frail, ice-blue glowing with reckless defiance, fair skin haloed in flame, he didn't seem like anyone or any thing Reno had ever seen before. Cloud was, in comparison, somehow made of something finer… something pure, holy… as if he wasn't quite human, or had origins in electricity and fire, a bright spirit-elemental composed of light, radiating even when surrounded.

'Okay… imagination running a bit wild there…' Reno shrugged off the strangely poetic and dreaming mood with some difficulty, 'it's odd… though I can't say that was entirely an exaggeration.' But still, his friend did seem almost to glow, strangely awesome and untouchable, and for a moment he was seeing the… essence of Cloud, the aura of concentrated, flaring light, untapped potential and power flooding through and illuminating depthless eyes of clear ocean-turquoise. The sheer brilliance caused him to close his eyes and turn away, eventually finding it impossible to continue looking, the otherworldly glare hurting his eyes, forcing him to shield them. Reno wondered why no one else seemed to have been affected, he expected Erek and Johnny to be shrinking away from the revealed glory.

'What…? That light, coming from Cloud. He's… … inhumanly beautiful, transfigured. So bright… aloof, untouchable, unreachable.' When Reno looked back up quickly, the scene had gone back to normal, as if it had only been a hallucination brought on by a combination of sleepiness and chemical imbalance from the cafeteria food.

Cloud was still standing, locked in a face-to-face confrontation with the bullies, eyes containing a distant, timeless quality about them, an almost unfocused look that saw without taking things in, as he exorcised the ghosts or demons of his childhood memories. Then, Erek took an intrusive step forward, and Cloud's vision snapped sharply back into place, as he effortlessly drew on the cloak of ice-calm numbness that settled around his shoulders and wrapped around him, covering him in the safety of uncaring.

'I bet he thinks I'm schizophrenic,' Cloud thought with a mental laugh, which he tried not to let show on his face. It was only partially successful, as the effort not to smile had twisted the expression, turning or warping it into a slightly sadistic smirk. He shifted to meet them, position sliding to a neutral stance that could easily become the attacking position, muscles relaxing, preparing to go into the half-crouch and lunge to start the fight.

Erek's complacency had been discarded quite a while ago, first by that ignominious defeat yesterday, and again now, due to the utter lack of fear in Cloud's reaction. There was something simply… unnerving about the abrupt role reversal, and the way things had changed so rapidly. 'Everything's different… It's not the same, not like it was back home. Nibelheim..' he complained silently, a petulant whine at the twist of fate upon reaching Midgar. He was not used to it, especially not used to this Cloud, the one glaring at him and battle-ready.

'There are subtle alterations… okay, hell, big hit-people-over-the-head type changes in the current situation,' Reno thought, grinning. He admired the way Cloud moved, full of languorous grace, the easy, lounging, unhurried stance of a predator, like a big cat, a panther or a tiger. The unsettling aura of danger lurking at the back of his eyes, a challenge and an eagerness to meet his opponent… Tensing, fingers flexing in anticipation, feet shifting, a prelude to practically dancing, ready to face-off in the deadly pace of death. Smirk widening, impatient defiance and a reckless disregard of personal safety, of his life, mixed with cool contempt…

'He reminds me… of Sephiroth?' Reno stared incredulously, either this was another facet of Cloud's personality manifesting, one he had not seen before, or the General had an incredibly powerful influence on his friend. It ended before it even began, the Nibelheim lot backing off nervously and Cloud resuming his seat, albeit with casual, purposely obvious deliberation. The blond's gaze flickered past his opponents, glancing briefly to the sides of the room, a pointed reminder of their last encounter with a pillar, a silent taunt that made Erek's blood boil as he seethed impotently at being unable to hurt and humiliate his "victim". However, cowardly though he might be, in spite of whatever else that could be said about Erek at that particular moment in time, he was no fool. He knew when he was beaten, and would not court disaster by taking revenge. At least, not for now.

"Well, you won," Reno exclaimed cheerfully, slapping Cloud on the back, "he's gone for now, right?"

"Yeah," Cloud replied… but was that a note of disappointment in his tone… …

Reno yawned, and idly watched Raven and another of his dormitory mates, the dark-haired Gavin bicker over something that sounded trivial, but apparently was of the utmost importance to the both of them. The remaining recruits in the dining hall had been unceremoniously kicked out of their choice seats near the exit by a bunch of SOLDIERs who pulled rank and chased them off. Hence, the bulk of the recruits were now outside the cafeteria, after grudgingly vacating their chairs. By some mutual consent, the entire group had drifted down the hallway, and gravitated towards an empty common room, that was mainly used during the day for meetings, but was now unoccupied and available, the perfect area for them to congregate. The training groups broke up into their clichés, going by age, hometown, or some secret shared interests. Reno, gregarious and extroverted by nature, moved easily around the room, socialising freely. Though some might find it peculiar, the general conversation of the teenaged boys turned from idle chatter to, of all things, gossip. Well, perhaps not so much gossip as bragging and whispered asides.

He vaguely wondered where Cloud had gone, the last time he had seen the younger boy was when they had left the cafeteria. His unmethodical search led him a completely random path, until his ears picked up a rather loud voice, and the broken snatches of words. Curiosity piqued, Reno took a slight detour, heading in the general direction of the largest group.

"Tell us more! C'mon." The encouragement of his eager audience spurred the speaker onto greater heights… or depths as the case might be. Nudging his way closer, avoiding stepping on other people's miscellaneous appendages, Reno noticed with disgust it was that brown-haired Nibelheim leader boasting to his cronies.

"Trying to boost his poor little punctured frail ego…" he muttered to no one in particular, it was obvious that Erek needed to restore his self-confidence with bluster and bravado after that second confrontation with Cloud. The topic of their conversation was typical, although quite unsavoury, especially at that "raging-hormones" stage, as they all seemed to be discussing their "pursuits" and "conquests", to put it delicately. Unlike the crude way they were phrasing it now.

"There weren't many girls in Nibelheim, but that one girl…" Erek wolf-whistled appreciatively.

"Good, was she?" asked another, tone a mix between envious and voyeuristic.

Nodding sagely, Johnny gestured expansively, hands tracing out imaginary curves in the air in front of him. "Ve-ry nice. Tifa might be just 13, but she's definitely got it all there."

"What about the face?"

Erek paused, before replying, "I've got a picture, wanna see?" After some fumbling, he extricated his wallet from his back pocket and flipped it open to the photograph, then passed it around.

Reno took a cursory glance as it was passed around to eager hands, seeing a girl of average prettiness with long brown hair, but quite forgettable in looks, except for the all-too generous build, if you liked that sort of thing, that is. Judging from the reactions, most did, except for Reno, who thought privately, 'I don't see what's so incredible about her. That's supposed to be the prettiest girl in the entire town?' He smothered a grin at the truthful, but politically incorrect thought that entered his mind, 'Cloud looks waaay more beautiful than that. Of course, he'd kill me if I told them that…'

"Of course, I wasn't that interested in her face, if you get my meaning," Erek continued, leering suggestively.

At the knowing glances of the rest of the crowd, Johnny grinned and added "Tifa's a damned good lay. Awfully easy too."

"Yeah, her dad thinks she's so innocent and pure, but she's probably played around with the entire neighbourhood since she was ten. Well, except for virgin-boy," Erek sneered in satisfaction, gaze turning to the side, and Reno turned to look as well, feeling a tinge of dread, like a strange premonition of trouble, at what he would see there.

On the outskirts of the now-silent group, but still within hearing distance, large blue eyes filled with disbelief and horror, Cloud stood, holding a paper cup half-filled with water, which explained his previous absence. Reno had the sudden image of innocence somehow being soiled, disillusioned, tainted. The priceless purity with which a child goes out into the world, in all innocence, but then eyes are opened clearly, forced open, rather, to see the danger and hurt lurking outside the safety and sanctuary of one's own home. The exact feeling of uncertainty and desolation as your well-ordered world suddenly crashes down around you, and nothing is the same. By the expression on his face, and the absolute stillness of his posture, it was painfully obvious that Cloud had been standing there in shocked silence for quite a while, long enough to have heard the entire conversation, perhaps. Erek smiled in triumph, gloating over the victory he had over his enemy. With a flash of insight blinding in it's clarity, Reno saw the whole thing as a massive set-up, a way for Erek to get back at Cloud for the latter's humiliation of the former. Then, the darkened, vulnerable blue eyes turned to him, or at least, in his direction, and Reno had to wince away from the emotion, akin to despairing sorrow, contained within.

"She was a really good fuck," Erek said callously, revelling in the opportunity to strike. At that last parting shot, and with the suddenly-concrete realisation dawning, Cloud's lost expression switched to a deep hurt. Reno felt a sharp stab of guilt, although he had no reason to, as if by simply being a part of the group he had betrayed his friend unconsciously, and could not face the unspoken, quiet accusation he read in that glance.

"Cloud…" Reno started forward, speaking tentatively, unsurely, hands reaching out to offer… offer what? An apology? Or comfort? He never got a chance to find out, as the emotionless mask shuttered off Cloud's face, and Reno was left grasping at air, as the blond turned and fled, dropped cup spilling water in place of the tears he would not cry.

Authors notes: (continued)

Sorry for leaving on such a cliffhanger, but I was in a hurry to finish before I left for vacation AGAIN, and I pretty much presumed you people would rather get this much than wait for the full part for another month. I really liked the last sentence, it may be egotistical of me, but I just enjoyed writing it.

1) Tifa's a bitch, isn't she? I always knew there was a reason why I instinctively hated her. (Knowing Shadows/Steph, fellow Tifa-bashers unite! I hope she experiences eternal torment in your next chapter… Mwahahahahaha)

2) Poor Cloud… but he doesn't really like her anyway. Sephiroth or Reno would be glad to "comfort" him, though.

Read and Review, please. This is my first fic, so be kind! Comments and criticism welcomed. Please review… I need to know if there are still readers or if everyone basically lost interest.