These characters aren't mine, sadly, and I make no profit from Harry Potter. I cry out to the stars, "If only, if only."
Sorry this chapter took so long to get up, thank you for being patient and not sending me a ton of emails complaining. Thanks to Corporal Spivilles and savetheduckplz for their support and the help they gave for this chapter.
Chapter 24: Sue's Potion, Day 2
Diina was overjoyed to wake up in her own body the next morning in the room adjoining the Hospital wing that she shared with Sue. The boys were in another room, and Diina had no doubt that they would go at each other's throat when they woke up this morning. One of the two would emerge from that room alive and victorious, his claim over Diina now permanent. She was reluctant to wake either one of them, but she wanted to talk to Draco privately.
Diina crept into the boys' room. Harry was sprawled out over his bed, one leg dangling off the edge. Draco was curled up like a cat. They are exact opposites, like night and day. I love Harry because he's so much like me. And yet, I love Draco because he's the exact opposite. Why does love have to be so complicated?
She quickly cast a spell to ensure that Harry would sleep soundly for another half hour. That should be enough time for her to talk with Draco. Not wanting to take any chances though, she put a hand over Draco's mouth as she shook his shoulder. He jerked awake and began thrashing around, panic in his eyes. The second he realized it was her, he calmed down.
"We need to talk," she whispered, letting go of him and leading Draco out of the castle and down to the lakeshore. He stood, leaning against a tree, but Diina opted to sit on the grass, facing him. "What I said yesterday about being pregnant was all a lie." Draco quirked an eyebrow. "I just wanted to see if Harry's love was unconditional, that's all."
"So why did Sue and Potter come running to stop you from saying anything?" Draco inquired.
"I told Sue I was going to make up that story, and she probably mentioned it to Harry. Knowing you'd think it was true, they came to stop me," Diina lied.
Without a word, he went around behind her, dropped to his knees, and put his chin on her shoulder. "I think you're lying," he whispered. His warm breath tickled her ear and made her shiver. He gently nibbled on her ear and she fell back into his arms, unable to hold herself up. Draco turned her and pulled her up against him. He kissed her gently at first, but as it increased in intensity, it increased in roughness. Do I really love him? He pulled away.
"No. This isn't love," she whispered.
"How do you know it's not?" Draco replied softly.
That was just the problem. She didn't know. She'd never been in love before, so how could she tell?
-
"WAKE UP!" Sue shouted at Harry. He sprang awake. "Diina and Malfoy disappeared."
Without a word to Sue, Harry charged out of the Hospital wing, and followed his instincts to the lakeshore. Malfoy was laying Diina down on the ground when Harry reached them and tapped Malfoy on the shoulder. When he turned to look, Harry decked him.
Hauling Malfoy to his feet, Harry continued to pound the jerk until he was certain Malfoy would have two marvelously black eyes. Releasing that filthy, bad excuse for a human, Harry helped Diina up. Ashamed of what he'd caught her doing, she turned her back on him and started to walk away.
"Are you alright?" he asked, stopping her in her tracks.
"I...guess so," Diina replied, not turning around to face him.
Harry spun Diina around and gently forced her to look at him. He could feel himself shaking, adrenaline still pumping through his veins.
"Diina...I think it's about time you made a final decision," he said, a tremor in his voice. He was frightened of what she'd say, if she did make a choice. She'll pick me...she has to pick me. How could she pick him over me? He shuddered to even think of that possibility, and instead stared her right in the eyes, trying desperately to convince her completely of his love for her.
-
Diina tried to look away quickly before Harry spoke, but as soon as he said the words, she found herself unable to look away. She felt Draco's eyes on her and tried to speak. Nothing came out at first; her voice seemed to have failed her. She cleared her throat roughly.
"Harry...I-I don't...now is that really fair?" she asked, her voice becoming high-pitched and stressed. How can he ask that of me? Doesn't he know what I'm going through?
Draco scowled darkly and touched his face gingerly before shoving Harry away from Diina and pulling her over to him. "I believe she already has chosen," he said softly. "In light of what you interrupted, of course, I think it's safe to assume."
Harry's hands curled into fists and his body began to shake again, but he bit his lip and suppressed the urge to pummel the git more than he already had. Instead, he focused on Diina's face (blocking out Draco's arm around her waist) and fixed her with a grim stare. "Can't you see what you're doing, Diina?" he said, taking a step closer to her so that he could whisper. Draco recoiled slightly, but didn't loosen his hold on Diina.
"What do you mean what I'm doing, Harry?" Diina asked warily, eyeing him with a suspicious air.
"You're driving me crazy, Diina! One minute, it seems like you're mine, and the next you're running off to the lakeside with that git!" Harry said fiercely, pointing at Draco. "I just don't understand it! I love you, Diina, and- please, please just make up your mind! I can't take it anymore! I can't deal with it, I can't, but if I know that you aren't really mine I might be able to keep some scrap of my sanity! I'm begging you, Diina, just make a choice! I don't care who you choose, I just want you to be happy, but you've got to make a choice, you've got to. I'm falling apart not knowing!"
Diina watched Harry as he stood before her, trembling, and felt tears welling up in her eyes. It was obvious that he was in pain, and she felt terrible. He was right, she had done this to him, all because of her own indecision. She sighed heavily. It was true; it seemed the time had finally come for her to choose. She didn't want to, but there was no way out of it – she couldn't stand the look on Harry's face. She dragged in a deep breath and willed herself to say what was in her mind.
"I choose neither of you," she said softly, giving no trace of emotion in her voice. "I won't make a promise unless my heart's one hundred percent behind it. I don't know where my heart is right now, but you wanted a decision, so there it is. I choose neither." She tried to walk away, but Draco held onto her tightly. She whipped out her wand and put it to his temple. "You forget I'm the niece of a Dark Lord. Let go or I'll curse you to oblivion," she hissed, anger distorting her features. She narrowed her eyes and it was only then that Harry could see her resemblance to Voldemort.
"You have to help me," Sue screeched, appearing out of nowhere and grabbing Draco, yanking him away from Diina (who stormed up to the castle). "Mince is gone! I can't find her anywhere! Mince really loves you and I'm sure if you call her, she'll come. You have to help me!"
"I don't care about your dumb mutt, stupid wench," Draco hissed, trying to free himself.
"She's the only friend I have to talk to. I need her," Sue wailed, tightening her grip on him.
"What about Diina?" Harry asked, inwardly wincing at the previous conversation with Diina.
"She won't wanna talk, I saw her face. You two made her cry," Sue commented.
"You see what you've done, Potter?" Draco snapped. "She was mine until you had to interrupt us and ask her to choose."
"There's no way in Hell that she ever has been or ever will be yours," Harry shot back.
"I would think that her carrying my child would imply that she's mine," Draco returned.
"It implies you took advantage of her."
"You can't take advantage of someone who's willing."
Sue, quite impatient of being ignored in the middle of her dog-crisis, punched Draco to get his attention. However, she must have punched a bit too hard, for she knocked him unconscious. "Oops. Oh well, let's go search for Mince," Sue said, dragging Draco's unconscious body towards the castle.
-
Harry sat under the tree by the lake. He realized it was the tree he had found Diina under that one night. His tears fell slowly, but steadily. Why did I push her like that? Because I was going crazy not knowing. I guess they don't say "madly in love" for nothing. Was my sanity worth more than her?
Rain began pouring down and Harry tried to remember if there had been rain clouds a few moments ago. He couldn't recall any, but that didn't mean that there hadn't been. The surface of the lake began to swirl as Harry sat there, getting drenched. Finally, the fact that he was getting wet registered in his brain, so he went back into Hogwarts, hoping he could find a good place to hide before Ron and Hermione found him and asked him what was going on.
It took him a moment to realize he heard music, and the words formed in his head.
All alone on a Sunday morning. Outside the rain is falling, falling, inside I'm slowly dying. But the rain will hide my crying, crying, crying. And you...don't you know my tears will burn the pillow, set this place on fire?...
He'd found quite a convenient dark and disused side corridor and began making his way down it, still thinking of the words of the song.
...I gave you my love in vain. My body never knew such pleasure, my heart never knew such pain. And you, you leave me so confused. Now I'm all cried out over you...
Harry discovered an almost invisible door and decided that would be the best place to hide and lament, the sad song echoing through him.
...For why was I such a fool? Now I see that the grass is greener. Is it too late to find my way home? How could I be so wrong? Leaving me all alone, don't you know my tears will cause an inferno. Romance of these flames, why should I take the blame? You were the one who left me neglected, apology not accepted. Add me to the broken hearts you've collected. I gave you all of me. How was I to know you would weaken so easily? I don't know what to do. Now I'm all cried out over you. I gave you my love in vain. My body never knew such pleasure, my heart never knew such pain. And you, you left me confused. Now I'm all cried out, now I'm all cried out over you...
It was at that moment that Harry heard a whimpering. Investigating a dark corner of the room, he found Mince chained up. "Who did this to you?" he mumbled, reaching to unchain her. That's when Peeves appeared, knocking Harry aside and making off with Mince.
-
Diina had found a convenient closet to hide in after capturing Mrs. Norris to ensure that she wouldn't be found. She was sitting in the dark closet, silently crying while stroking a very content Mrs. Norris. Diina didn't realize she was hearing music until the words were floating through her head.
Now I will tell you what I've done for you, fifty thousand tears I've cried. Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you and still you won't hear me. Don't want your hand this time, I'll save myself. Maybe I'll wake up for once. Not tormented daily, defeated by you. Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom. I'm dying again. I'm going under, drowning in you. I'm falling forever, I've got to break through. I'm going under. Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies, so I don't know what's real and what's not. Always confusing, the thoughts in my head, so I can't trust myself anymore. I'm dying again. I'm going under, drowning in you. I'm falling forever, I've got to break through. So go on and scream. Scream at me, I'm so far away. I wont' be broken again, I've got to breathe. I can't keep going under.
As Mrs. Norris began to purr, Diina mused over how truly she felt that song conveyed her feelings at this moment. It was hours before Diina slid back into a consciousness of time. Realizing she had missed both breakfast and lunch, and that it was dinnertime, she stood and carried Mrs. Norris with her to the Great Hall. When she got there, she caught the tail end of Dumbledore's speech.
"...we are attributing her disappearance to the occurrence that is causing most of your magic to go horribly wrong. If anyone has any information on the cause of this occurrence or the whereabouts of Mrs. Norris, please inform us immediately," Dumbledore said.
"Mrs. Norris is right here," Diina called from the doorway. Every pair of eyes fastened on Diina, who suddenly felt like a horrid, thieving worm.
"Mrs. Norris!" Filch exclaimed, coming over and gently prying his cat out of her arms.
-
Harry watched as Filch took his beloved cat from Diina. He wanted to tell her how he felt, and something rose up inside of him. Music started ringing throughout the Great Hall. Everyone searched for the source, but ceased immediately when Harry began to sing to Diina.
How will I start tomorrow without you here? Whose heart will guide me when all the answers disappear? Is it too late? Are you too far gone to stay? This one's forever, should never have to go away. What will I do? You know I'm only half without you. How will I make it through? If only tears could bring you back to me, if only love could find a way. What I would do, what I would give if you returned to me some day, somehow, some way. If my tears could bring you back to me. I'd cry you an ocean if you'd sail on home again. Wings of emotion will carry you, I know they can. Just let love guide you and your heart will chart the course. Soon you'll be drifting into the arms of your true North. Look in my eyes, you'll see a million tears have gone by and still they're not dry. If only tears could bring you back to me, if only love could find a way. What I would do, what I would give if you returned to me some day, somehow, some way. If my tears could bring you back to me. I'd hold you close and shout the words I only whispered before for one more chance, for one last dance. There's nothing I wouldn't give and more. If only tears could bring you back to me, if only love could find a way. What I would do, what I would give if you returned to me some day, somehow, some way. If my tears could bring you back to me.
The music faded away and Harry waited for Diina's response. However, McGonagall came by and whisked the two of them out of the Hall, down many corridors, and into Dumbledore's office, where they waited briefly for the Headmaster.
"I would like to speak to Diina alone for a moment, Harry. Would you mind stepping out into the hall?" Dumbledore asked. Harry complied, slipping out the door. Shutting the door behind him, Harry pressed his ear against it, hoping to hear this conversation.
-
"Sir, do we really have to do this?" Diina asked. "I don't feel like talking right now."
"We can sit in silence until you feel like talking," Dumbledore replied kindly, sitting down at his desk.
"It's personal...oh alright, I'll tell you. Harry and Draco asked me to choose between them. But I'm confused, so I said I chose neither. I don't know what to do. I like Harry, but I like Draco too!" She felt a funny feeling inside her. "I...think...I feel a song coming on." And with that, she began to sing.
Who, who, who to choose? Who to love and who to lose? Who, who, who'll be mine? In whose direction points the sign? Who will love me in return? Who'll be steadfast, taciturn? Who'll leave and who'll stay? Who will never run away? Who can always make me grin? Oh, whose arms will I rest in? How can I make this choice? Please God, may I hear your voice? Will you tell me which to choose? Which to love and which to lose? Whose proposal should I take? Whose heart will I have to break?
The song was interrupted by Snape charging into the office, carrying an extremely large, old book. He dragged Harry in and had Draco and Sue trailing behind. "I've figured it out," Snape proclaimed, giving Dumbledore the book. "It's a very old and very complicated potion. It was never given an official name, however it's been referred to as Tuireadh Gaol, or Mourning Love. A potion for those hopelessly in love and unable to express their feelings, it first has the two switch bodies so that they may see themselves through the other's eyes, then returns them to their bodies the next day, having them express feeling through song."
"Wait just a minute," Diina said. "Are you implying that secretly, I love Sue or Sue loves me, and Harry loves Draco or Draco loves Harry?"
"No, Miss Riddle. You didn't let me finish," Snape said, shooting her a glare. "It is intended for only two people, so when Sue tried to make it for four, it caused...problems. I don't believe you'll enjoy the side effects. Next month, you'll switch bodies for one day again. However, you will not switch with the person you did yesterday. A month after that, you'll switch with the only person you haven't been previously."
"That's just creepy. Sue, I'm going to kill you," Diina mumbled.
"Also, the urge to sing to express your feelings will last for a year," Snape added. "You should be able to control it though."
"You know, I'm just so glad that I came here," Diina said sarcastically. "If I hadn't, my life wouldn't be in shambles." She stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her.
-
Blaise Zabini watched Diina come in, curl up on the couch, and cry. He had a secret crush on her, but with Potter and Malfoy competing for her affections, he'd figured he didn't stand a chance. But for Diina to be crying like that meant that either one or both boys had done something wrong. Comforting her would be a good way to begin a relationship.
"It kills the soul to see an angel cry," Blaise said, sitting on the table in front of the couch. She looked up with tear-stained eyes. He conjured a rose and presented it to her.
"Thank you," she whispered, rewarding him with a smile.
"If you ever just want to talk, look me up. I'm always available," he said, getting up and heading for his room as he had seen Malfoy come in when Diina had taken the rose. When he reached the stairs leading to the seventh-years' room, Malfoy grabbed him by the neck of his robes.
"What was that about, Zabini?" Malfoy hissed.
"Just being friendly," Blaise replied softly.
"See to it that you don't get too friendly," Malfoy said, letting go.
-
Draco had watched her from the shadows for a few hours. Eventually, she cried herself to sleep. He crept out of the shadows and stroked her tear-soaked cheek gently with the back of his hand. She stirred, and he retreated to the shadows. When she did not wake, he let the song he'd been suppressing out.
I wait in the darkness. Frozen winds surround my face. In the cover of darkness I can make believe it's you. I feel you like the rain, I feel you like a storm cloud, building in my heart. I wonder if you know the pain, to want the one thing that you haven't got. Just a twist in time, and you could be mine. Just a sip of wine, and you could be mine. Just a kiss divine. A hand brushes by my love. A smile fuels a steel inferno. You don't have to die to leave my world, stand still and you've departed. It seems I'm not on your mind and I'm just wasting my time. I'm just a fool to believe. Just a twist in time, and you could be mine. Just a sip of wine, and you could be mine. Just a kiss divine, and you could be mine. Won't you leave me in the darkness? Take away the pride, all the dignity that's burning inside. Can't you see I'm standing naked? I'll bear all the crosses and crucifixes you can provide, if you could decide. Just a twist in time, and you could be mine. Just a sip of wine, and you could be mine. Just a kiss divine, and you could be mine.
-
Sue wandered the halls, calling for Mince. Harry had informed her that Peeves had stolen her dog. She sniffled, thinking that Peeves might kill Mince and began singing.
Dead puppies, dead puppies, dead puppies aren't much fun. They don't come when you call, they don't chase squirrels at all. Dead puppies aren't much fun...
Her voice echoed off the wall as she continued to sing while avidly hunting for her precious pup.
-
Okay, time for credits...The songs must be given their full due.
Harry's first song was "All Cried Out" by Allure. His second song was "If Only Tears Could Bring You Back" by Midnight Sons.
Diina's first song was "Going Under" by Evanescence. Her second song wasn't actually a song, it was a poem by one of my readers Corporal Spivilles...
Draco's song was "Mine" by Savage Garden.
Sue's song was "Dead Puppies" by Dr. Demento.
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Also, if any of you have any ideas of what you'd like to see happen next in the story, email me I'd love to hear what you guys think, and I'm open...if I use your ideas, I will give you due credit. Also, tell me who your favorite character is in my story right now...I'd love to know who is good and who needs improving.