This chapter and the three following it have been/are being rewritten. Nothing major, really, just smoothing put John more in character (I hope) and smoothing out the "facts" that I'm building my ideas off of for a sequel-ish type thing.

Let me know.

Ch.2

Teyla was the first to enter the room, she gestured to the Major to take a seat wherever he'd be comfortable. He took a seat at the table near the wall, his hands rested on his lap. Teyla made her way to another room, smaller in size that housed the kitchen like area that most of the quarters possessed.

From her position in the make-shift kitchen she could see John fidget in his chair. He straightened his back, and decided to slouch instead, his hands sat awkwardly on his lap as he shook his leg. He was uncomfortable; she wished he would not be so hesitant with her. She would not judge him, or mock him, she would listen and learn.

"It will be a few minutes." She said, placing what was needed on a table top, then onto the "stove". Teyla walked back to the Major and sat in the chair across from him. "Was she like you, in terms of…personality?"

He smiled. Teyla loved his smile, it could convey so many things; whether it is mischief, flirtation, or just laughing at a joke or trying to be charming to get his way, which he often did. She wondered if it was a talent many Earthlings had, Ford too sometimes had smiles that would seem to hide or imply something.

"Uh…well, she was…less crazy, she had a good head on her shoulders…a good heart. I was usually the one always getting in trouble," he laughed, "Actually, once, I got arrested. We, uh, some friends and I, built a brick wall in the middle of the road. No one really used that road, so you could imagine how surprised we were when a cop car, of all cars, ran into it. I ran faster after that night."

Teyla smiled at the thought, she had no idea what a 'cop car' looked like but she could see John staring into the face of an authority figure, trying to explain himself and getting nothing but trouble. He had this way about him, where even to an authority figure he may seem defiant, regardless of how truthful his statement.

"She was really a – a social butterfly, actually started dating my best friend, senior year. He was on the football team, defensive linebacker, remember when I showed you that…yeah." He trailed off. He was, however, saved by the whistle.

"I believe the tea is ready." Teyla said, with a slight bow of her head as she stood. John watched as she walked away. He felt rather dumb, she'd asked a question about his sister's personality and he'd launched to a story about himself. He realized his sister was a sore topic not because of bad blood, but because of how things had been left, everything had been dropped and suddenly ended. He mentally scolded himself, 'Why come in here if you weren't going to talk about anything relevant? Renee, you have to think about Renee. Oh God, I miss her…'

Teyla returned with a small tea pot made of hard clay, no doubt a personal belonging from before she'd met anyone from the expedition. In place of the cups she would have normally used, had she been on her own planet, she used the metal ones that were all over Atlantis. John took his cup with a grateful smile, "Teyla, I just…Thank you."

She smiled and nodded.

"We were adopted," He quickly took a sip of his tea, surprised at how he'd just thrown that out there. He hadn't told a whole lot of people that little tidbit. But he'd started, so, "and the people that took us in were pretty well off, so we never really lacked anything, practically spoiled and they still managed to teach us to be good people…"

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"Happy sweet sixteen." John said. He handed a small box to Renee as he flopped down on her bed. She held the box and regarded her brother with skeptical eyes. Despite her facial expression he could tell she couldn't wait to open it.

She ripped at the white, sparkling paper hiding her gift. It was a small pink box; she looked at John before opening it. Inside was a necklace, heart shaped pink quartz. Two of her favorite things in one, laid in silver.

"John." Her brows came together and rose up, a face that meant she liked it. He smiled, so twin intuition did have some bearing. "Now I feel dumb. I just got you that helmet for your bike…"

"Are you kidding?! You got a jet painted on it, and it said 'Flyboy'. I think it's awesome, and I think the girls will agree. Also, you hid that you knew about the bike very, very well."

She smiled wavered, unsure of whether he meant it or not. She placed the necklace around her think neck; she shifted her head and raised her eyebrows, "How do I look." The smile she wore now was completely genuine.

He shrugged. Her jaw dropped and she grabbed a pillow to toss at her brother. "Jerk."

He threw the pillow back, "Come on, you're my sister, how am I supposed to know if you look good? Anyway, let's go, mom and dad want to take us out to dinner."

"I'm not going; I hate you and hereby disown you." She crossed her arms.

"You can't disown me." She sat turned away from him, "Ugh…fine, you look fine, don't be so dramatic."

She turned back to him, a smile on her face. "Thanks." She walked past him, and then turned, her face now fixed in a serious look, "Do you think this year…they might send something?"

He knew she meant their birth-parents. Ever since they were old enough to know they'd been adopted, she thought maybe they would send something; maybe they would show up and say they cared. They cared so much they left their kids on some hospitals door step. They didn't even take them inside. It didn't matter, John had given up on 'maybe' long ago. He was very much stuck in reality, they were never going to see them and he didn't care. He was more than happy with the way things were.

He answered her question, not with words, but a motion of his arm, he held it out to her, bent at the elbow, "Shall we?"

She kept eye contact with him, expressing her dismay at his ability to say he just didn't care, with a soft smile and tired sigh she took his arm, "We shall.", and pulled him down the hall beside her.

Two Years Later

John ran down the hall to his sister's room, he skidded to a stop in front of her door and knocked. Nothing.

"Ugh!" he had something to ask her. Well, not so much ask as tell. He'd set up a double date for them; he and Sarah and she and Luke, his best friend. He didn't know why he hadn't thought of it sooner. Luke had developed something of a "thing" for Renee. John had caught Luke with his eyes glued to Renee as she walked out of a room. He'd dogged him for close to three hours before Luke finally admitted to it.

John took off in the other direction when she didn't answer. He took the stairs two at a time, and swung around the corner when he reached the bottom. His parents were in the den, reading a news paper and a book in big, soft chairs.

"You guys seen Renee?"

"I believe she went to the barn." his mother's voice came floating over the book to his ears. She had one of those voices you could just listen to and it didn't matter what was being said. He'd loved listening to her tell bed times stories when he was younger. She looked up to him with blue eyes, as clear as the sky. Her blonde hair was in a loose bun, and wisps of hair framed her face.

"She should be home in about an hour son, you could wait you know." His father smiled at him, knowing his words would do nothing, John was impatient. His fathers dark eyes shimmered behind his glasses, the man was full of a life that belied his graying hair.

John thanked his parents, silently grateful that he and his sister had been given to such kind people. He grabbed his helmet from the post and jumped on to his motorcycle, the barn Renee boarded her horse at was about two miles away, and he was in to much of a rush to walk it.

He parked the bike on the gravel drive, and headed to the barn he knew her horse, Jett, to be kept in. The hall was empty, aside from the horses and the respective noises each felt it needed to make. John wasn't really a land loving person, he'd rather be in the air.One of the reasons he couldn't wait for graduation, he was going to pilot something when he got out, it didn't matter what. He walked down the hall peering into the stalls.

He stopped in front of Jett's stall and scratched his head. She should have been there. At that moment something large dropped down from the ceiling, brushing his back, but not hitting him directly. He turned around as he moved forward with the impact. It was a bail of hay.

"What the hell? HEY!" he shouted, "Watch what you're doing!"

Renee appeared above him and smiled when she saw what had nearly happened.

"Well, little brother you should watch your step." She turned her back to him, moving down the ladder. John rolled his eyes, he hated when she called him that.

"You don't know that you're older."

She cocked her head and looked at him, "I feel older."

"Yeah, look it too." He laughed.

"Aha, I know where you sleep."

"Yeah, yeah. So hey, busy Saturday? No? Good? Me, Sarah, you, Luke…double."

"What? John, you can't just do that, I mean, I have things to do. Like…things." She walked away, picking up the hay bail and moving down the hall.

"Come on its Luke." He ran around and walked backwards down the hall in front of her.

"I…" she tried to hide a smile; he knew she liked him, "No. I have to study." John stopped her, and gave her his most charming face. His eyes begged her, he wanted her to be happy, and to do that he needed her be willing to take risks.

"Fine." She blurted, walking around him. She smiled ear to ear shaking her head as she walked into another room.

"Great." He shouted, he gave her a quick hug and went back to his bike, "You won't regret it, I swear on my life!"

------

"..and she didn't." he finished, still winding the necklace between his fingers, he gazed into the pink stone as thought it were a crystal ball playing out the stories he'd just told, "She wore it almost everyday."

Teyla nodded again, "She was lucky to have such a caring, younger, brother." She emphasized the' younger' trying to bring humor to him, she'd seen his face when he told her only moments ago, he hated to be the younger of the two.

"I was definitely the oldest." He laughed, "And the lucky one, to have known her."

"I still do not understand why she did not come as well."

"She probably wouldn't have wanted to come anyway, and besides she wouldn't have had clearance." His eyes became distant, looking but not seeing, "She wanted to be an Oceanographer, the water was her other great love, after horses. I think she would have loved it here, but she wanted a family; she wouldn't have left them for this." His voice was pained, deathly close to cracking with grief, but he held it in. Teyla wanted to shake him and tell him to cry. She wanted him to let everything go and mourn a terrible loss, and come back to her, whole again.

He wanted Renee there. He wanted everyone to know her, and enjoy the type of person she was. Teyla thought what it would be like to have two Sheppards running around the Pegasus Galaxy. It could have proved to have been like watching two very young, mischievous children. She laughed quietly at the thought. The two together could give McKay a real run for his money.

"But you did."

"Yep." It was then that it happened. His scar had opened big enough to let it out.

For the first time the necklace left his hand, as he ran them through his hair and rubbed at his eyes. He kept his head in his hands, his face masked. There was a sharp intake of breath, and Teyla placed her hand on his shoulder. He let out a strained laugh, laced with sorrow.

"She died…that's why I have the necklace, that's why I came…she died." His face was still out of view but she didn't need to see it to he was close to tears, she could hear it in his voice. She kept her hand in place, but made no move to do anything more. She didn't know the rules they had for this on Earth. Was she to offer comfort in the form of hugs, or merely reassuring words? She didn't know if she should feel awkward; make some excuse to leave him for a moment. In her time she had seen many families torn by loss, had seen many men mourn for children and wives, siblings and parents. She too had lost family. She wanted so badly to hold him, to show him that she cared, that she hurt for him, and that she knew.

Before she could stop herself she was beside him, her hand rubbing small circles into his back. He lowered his hands, keeping his face downward, he felt ridiculous, it had been fourteen years. Fourteen.

"To the day." He whispered.

"Major?"

"Fourteen years to the day since she died." He looked up at her; she realized how much strength that must have taken for him. He didn't like to appear weak, even when life sucking bugs were stuck to his neck. His eyes were cold, hard and something like tears made his eyes sparkle, waiting for the right amount of fluid to accumulate before following a path traced out by the tears.