Ch. 4

She stood back and let the Major be. Again, Teyla found herself at an impasse, does she go to him or wait for him to acknowledge her? Had she not known him and not witnessed the outburst that happened only moments ago, she might have waited. Instead she went to the bed and sat where there was room for her, near his head.

He folded his arms, resting his forehead on them, and stared down into the blankets. She laid her hand softly on the back of his head, and lightly stroked his hair. She was reminded of times in her own childhood when her father had done this for her.

She could feel his body shutter and relax with every breath. He was fighting it down. He'd gotten out what he meant to say, and now he could put it all behind him again. He rolled onto his back, laying a forearm across his eyes. 'He is still trying to appear strong…' Teyla smiled. If there were ever one thing she could count on, it was Major John Sheppard's will; the will to live, to fight, to laugh, to be everyone's hero, to love.

To love; her father had always tried to romanticize her with stories of unending love, love that could defeat even the Wraith. She had loved her father with that unending love, she had loved another man with that love, and still the Wraith were strong and she had lost them.

"When I was very little, and very scared, my father would bring me close to him." She looked at John, aware his eyes were closed, but aware that he listened with his entire being, "He would sit with me and tell me stories. About how one day all Wraith would be destroyed and how true love could defeat any evil. When he was taken, I saw everything he'd told in those moments to be a lie. And then to have met you, it restored my hope in his stories and I found it once more to be a comfort to have such lies to escape to. I would like nothing more to comfort you John. You cannot harbor such hate, and torment forever."

He moved his head to look up at her. He was exhausted; no wonder he'd never been as emotional again after that day, it took a lot out of a person. "I didn't mean to…ya know, just a minute ago. She left me, whatever happened, whoever took her," his voice held the coviction of man convinced. Someone had taken her from him, otherwise she would never have left, and Teyla was some what inclined to agree, "…slipped through my fingers." It was a whisper, God was he tired.

"They will get what they deserve. One day perhaps someone will catch them."

"I want it to be me." He flipped onto his back, his composure and strength all returning. Teyla kept her hand in his hair, and brushed back the hair on his forehead; she smiled slightly at the sight of his eyes. The red was going, and slowly the almost carefree light was returning to his hazel eyes. The physical contact was as much for herself as it was for him. She truly did feel as though these people, these earthlings, had restored her hope in all tales her people like to tell. Maybe they would defeat the Wraith, maybe they wouldn't. Either way a people who had never suffered the Wraith were here now, and could possibly one day save all the peoples of this galaxy, as well as their own. And that was something to believe in.

While she wanted the Wraith dead, she wouldn't mind seeing earth, the real earth, and all the things Major Sheppard had told her about. "I wish I had known her."

The Major picked himself up, and for a moment he sat beside Teyla. She didn't fail to notice how his hand had come to rest on hers.

"I'm pretty beat." He said to the floor, "Guess I shouldn't wait around to be kicked out."

Teyla swore her heart had skipped a beat. Was he asking to stay? Did she want him to stay? Of course she did, he was upset, only now being able to push it all back into his memory's hiding place. She didn't have time to answer before the Major stood, taking her hand with him. Maybe he hadn't wanted to stay after all.

"Kirk would be disappointed." He said as he pulled her to a standing position. He looked her in the eye and gave her a half hearted grin and a sigh before he pulled her into a hug. He'd wanted to do this earlier, now he felt he needed it. Teyla's eyes looked over the Major's shoulder, all night she'd been giving what comfort she could, how could she have so unprepared for him to offer a simple gesture of thanks?

She quickly dismissed the thought and hugged him back. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the sensation of his arms around her. It was a feeling she could get used to, a strong, protecting embrace. But she wasn't sure if it was something she should allow to happen. She found herself feeling this way more and more, every time they were alone and even when they weren't.

As he pulled back, leaving his hands resting lightly on her elbows, he gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks. A lot." His hands dropped to his sides, "It's uh…it's good to get it out." his hands patted the side of his legs a few times before he spoke again, "Teyla..."

"Yes?"

He leaned toward her and brushed his lips against hers in a quick light kiss.

"See ya tomorrow." He promptly turned and left the room. Her eyes followed him out, and stared even when the door had closed. Another earth custom? She could ask Dr. Weir. After a few moments she sat it down at the table and noticed the Major had left in such a hurry he'd forgotten to pick up his sister's necklace.

She looked at it, almost afraid to touch it. She'd give it back to him in the morning; she had a pretty good idea where he'd be.

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"Stupid, stupid." John muttered as he walked quickly to his own room.

He kissed her what was he thinking? He could say he was tired, but that would make him look vulnerable, didn't want that. He wasn't sure if he could handle having to admit to another feeling, he wasn't even sure what it was.

That was a lie. He knew what it was. It's not like he'd never fallen for someone before.

As he threw himself down onto his own bed, he tried to push the thoughts away. He was just tired. Tried, and that's all. Nothing out of the ordinary here, nope, not a thing, just tired, frayed nerves.

He fell asleep with the feeling that his heart was trying to call his mind a liar.

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The next morning John found himself in the same spot he'd been the night before, looking out over a sun streaked city. Only now he was minus one small, very important thing. He'd swung by Teyla's room, but she hadn't been there, so he'd have to wait. It drove him crazy not knowing where it was, but he knew Teyla wouldn't let anything happen to it. She'd probably be the one to find him.

"Major Sheppard." Speak of the devil. He smiled, and she was wearing blue.

"Morning."

"You left this in my room. I was quite surprised."

He took the necklace back, and noted the carefulness with which she placed it in his hand. But surprised? That he kissed her or that he'd left the necklace, or both? He wasn't inclined to ask any of those questions.

"Wanna get some breakfast."

"I cannot, Sergeant Markham has agreed to take me to the main land today. You are welcome to join us."

"Nah…I think I'll just hang around here today. Maybe do something thinking."

She bowed her head, "I must go. Are you sure you will not come?"

"Yeah, next time though. I swear."

She smiled and whispered and walked away. He looked at the necklace before slipping it into a pocket. It had to have been surprise at both, but she hadn't seemed to mind the kiss.

"Oh, Major Sheppard, you forgot this in my room…." John rolled his eyes, McKay.

"Eavesdropping, Rodney? I'd think that was beneath you genus types."

"Merely passing by. I did see you in there, wasn't sure if you'd spend the night though. But I guess you do tend to have a thing for brunettes don't you?"

"I didn't spend the night."

"Of course…and Kavanaugh is turning into a warmhearted care-bear of a human being."

"Look, I told her a story. And if you have a problem with that or go around telling people otherwise, you'll have a nice story to tell everyone about my fist. Got it?" he said with a smile as he looked over to the astrophysicist.

"Oh, right. Don't worry, your secret tryst with Teyla is safe with me."

"You're impossible, you know that?"

"Major, I pride my self on it."

He smiled and walked away, which didn't seem to faze the good Doctor at all, Rodney shrugged and walked back inside.

John strolled down the balcony, his hand in his pocket, running over the smooth metal of his sister's necklace.

True, she was long gone, but she was still a major part of him. It was a part he always wished he could have back and always would. But she was also a part he'd come to terms with having lost.

She'd left him fourteen years ago, then he'd left her billions of miles away, but he could feel her all around him.

He smiled and closed his eyes against the wind. She was there.

Finito. R and R and keep an eye out for that 'something of a sequal' I was talking about. It could be a while.