A/N- be prepared to get really pissed at Draco and super creeped out because the story is moving on and the angst is a-rolling in!

Chapter Ten: Better Left Unsaid

Somethings were better left unsaid, but curiousity mixed with impulse was a deadly conbination. Volitale emotions, like the ingredients to a potion, are dangerous when misunderstood. Autumn knew that her feelings towards Draco were strong, and to be honest it scared her a bit. She had never felt anything so strong towards anyone, she didn't even know what to call the emotion. Draco, on the other hand, knew his emotions were strong, knew it was something he had never felt before and completely hated it. His feelings were a source of aggravation and frustration, therefore, making him moody and tempermental. Even more so than normal, and the Slytherins were noticing his odd behaviour, one day he was nicer than normal the next just merely looking in his direction was a crime. The 'library incident' didn't help him much either, it had just confused him even more on what Autumn meant to him and what he meant to her. That note that she had recieved also angered him, what did it mean by: "He can never love you," damn it he could love whoever the hell he wanted. He just wasn't sure what love was and who he loved.

Things had definitely cooled down a couple degrees between Autumn and Draco, to the point that they were at each other's throats during potions.

"What do you mean you didn't add the sassafras root?" Autumn shouted

"I mean I didn't pick up the bottle and pour it in! It isn't that hard to comprehend!" Draco shouted back

"Well Malfoy, way to frigging go! The potions dead, done, ruined. To hell with it, I refuse to fix the ruddy thing." She threw her hands in the air and turned on her heel. She headed to the back where the sinks were, she began to scrub her hands rigorously. Their potion had turned a most unimpressive grey sludge like colour. Autumn knew exactly how to fix it, it wasn't that hard actually, but she rather get a bad grade or have to redo it on her own then put up with that insufferable prat another second longer.

When Autumn returned to their table, Draco was leaning back in his chair with his arms folded acrossed his face looking unconcerned. He glanced over in her direction when she returned, but then ignored her. Autumn sat down, took out her sketch book and some pencils and began to sketch the scene around her. She was completely absorbed in her work when Professor Snape walked over and started scolding them. As a matter of fact, she didn't even hear him when he started in on how they weren't living up to their potential and out of all his students he thought that they were the only two that actually had brains.

"Autumn? Are you even listening to me? Ms. Hawthorne? AUTUMN!"

"what?"

" Five points for not responding properly and when I called on you."

"mmm, okay." Professor Snape took her sketch book and held it over the cauldron.

"HEY!" She jumped up and knocked her chair over in a vain attempt to get her notebook back.

"Fix this potion or I will burn this notebook." Snape took the book and left to go and criticize another pair of helpless students.

"damn it, damn it all." curse words came pouring out of Autumn's mouth. The sentences that were being formed really made no scene and contained just swear word after swear word. Everytime she picked up another jar of ingredients she muttered some other inappropriate comment or insult.

"Bloody Hell! Shut Up. It was just a stupid book. It's not like you can't just buy another." Draco snapped at her. She simply stared at him. Her fingers itched at her side, oh how nice it would have been to strangle him for his ignorance right about now.

"It was not just any book. And I can't buy another. I made it. It's full of my drawing and sketches. Plus I would have to go to an arts store to find another. Do you have any idea how far we are from the nearest muggle art store?"

"No, considering I am not a mudblood lover." She stared at him with such intense hatred in that moment that she thought that she would explode and kill him with her. She turned back to the potion, completed it on her own, poured a sample in a bottle, wrote her name on it and put on Snape's desk. At the end of the class period, the professor handed her the sketch book back and made her stay after so he could have a word. He asked her about the memory thing and she told him it was getting better, then he pulled something from his desk.

"This was your mother's, it was sent to me after she died, it's a record of all the people she encountered and memories they left. Maybe it will help."

"I hope so." Autumn took the small box of books and heading back towards the dormitories.

It was a nice winter day, in the beginnings of December. Most of the other Gryffindors were outside, playing in the first snow of the season, and the rest were in class. Autumn had the common room all to herself, so she settled the couch nearest the fire and began to read.

"Father told me today that this power runs in our family and he too is afflicted by it. He explained it quite cleverly as wandless Legilimency, the ability to extract emotions and memories from another person's mind. The trouble is none of us choose this, the Hawthornes were extremely powerful dark witches and wizards back in their day. It is legend that they created a potion allowing the drinker to look into the memories of others. I guess they tried it themselves and the effects never wore off. My father told me to try and be patient with it for a couple months, then when in contact with another person concentrate on finding a memory within them to extract. He told me to be very careful, for that if I get to deep in or extract to many memories that I could become mentally ill and eventually die. 'There is no cure for the serious consequences of the misuse of your ability' he told me ' If you have to many of other people's memories they will bleed into your own, causing you to develope several personalities, and eventually become lost in your own false world inside yourself, where you will go into a coma until you die. If the memories are very violent or the person gets hurt, there is a chance that you may also. Practice extreme caution with whom you choose to look into to or else there may be deadly consequences.' If it were up to me I wouldn't carry this burden, and I would make sure it would never pass on to my children, for it is them I pity the most."

Autumn closed the book, she was finding it hard to breathe. There must be some way to prevent her premature death. Was that why her mother died? It explained why her mother had never told her, who would want to tell their only child that eventually they would go insane and die? Autumn had to share this new development with Ginny.

"Hey Ginny, guess what?" Autumn found Ginny having a snowball fight with Ron and Harry.

"What?"

"I am going to go insane and die a premature death!" Autumn cried merrily

"Huh?" Ginny told the boys that she would be back later and she and Autumn went on a walk

"Here, I've been dying to show you this, read it." Autumn handed Ginny the page from her mother's diary, she had torn it out.

"Oh my word."

"Killer isn't it?"

"That's not funny. There has to be a way to fix this."

"Believe me there isn't, my mother died trying remember?" Ginny gave Autumn a sypathetic hug.

"We aren't interrupting anything are we?" Malfoy drawled

"We wouldn't want to ruin your moment." Pansy finished his insult for him.

"Yeah, the moments over move on." Ginny said

"Awww, so soon? I thought you two really had something there." Pansy said in a gosh-darn kinda way

"I tell ya what Gin, these people and their incessant idioticy are driving me insane." Autumn broke into a smile. Ginny threw her a dirty look.

"I could have sworn you were already insane." Malfoy added

"I'm telling you Ginny, this place will be the death of me." Autumn started laughing

"I am so glad you think the situation is funny." Ginny said in a motherly tone. Autumn laughed harder. The group of Slytherins stared at her, another one joined them, Malachi.

"Oh come on Ginny, lighten up a bit, it wouldn't kill you!" Autumn hardly got the sentence out, without stopping to laugh. Ginny got mad and stormed off.

"Looks like trouble in paradise." Pansy commented to Draco, he nodded in agreement.

"Some people just can't take a good joke. Maybe I am insane or something, but I thought it my puns were pretty funny." She started to laught again.

"What are you going on about?" Malfoy said

"Nothing, you wouldn't understand the troubles of being a teenager and trying to keep your sanity." Autumn wouldn't give it a rest. She thought it was best to laugh about it now, while it couldn't harm her. One day she wouldn't be able to laugh. 'Damn,' she thought, 'Well everyone dies eventually.' She walked off to find Ginny, and when she did find her, she had to promise not to make anymore puns, it was quite upsetting to Ginny.

"I've got an idea Gin!"

"What." It was evident that she was more upset than Autumn was at the moment

"Let's sneak and go have a butterbeer. That will take our minds off of everything!" Ginny grinned, cheek to cheek.

"That's a bloody brillant idea!" The two girls headed off the the one-eyed witch's passage.

A/N: sorry it was not so sweet and oh so short but next chapter is a riot! isssssss sssswweeaarssss ittsssss (gollum voice)