Harry Potter and the Clash of Souls
Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling and her fantastic creation, including its characters, places, and things belong to her and her alone. Being inspired, and being bereft of book six; I do nothing but emulate and elaborate. Thisis not intended to steal from her work, or for any monetary benefit.
Authors Note: Some of my readers told me there were quite a few spelling and grammar mistakes in this latest chapter. So I've basically went through it all and corrected what I missed before. I've also changed up some parts of this chapter that I weren't reallypleased with. For those that have read it already, it's generally the same, but just a bit easier to take in.
The next chapter will be coming very soon.
-CHAPTER FOUR-
Reluctant Reminiscing
"Harry! Where are you?"
The familiar voice of his one time professor woke him suddenly from his dreamless sleep.
"I'm up here Remus, I'll be down in a sec." He said, as he quickly changed out of his pyjamas and ran down the stairs to find Remus. He was standing in the living room looking out the window, he must have had a lot on his mind, for the expressions floating across his face were anything, but calm.
"Hello Harry, hmm just got up I see." Remus said pointing to Harry's still widely messed up hair.
'Why couldn't he have normal hair that stayed flat like any other normal person,' Harry thought to himself. He tried to hurriedly smooth it down, to no avail, before he asked what Remus was doing here at Privet Drive again so soon.
"Well, your uncles at work and your aunts taken your cousin shopping, so I thought I'd come and give you another lesson whilst the house was empty. Besides it was my shift to guard you, and we'll have plenty of time for a quick lesson before Mundungus comes to relieve me or the Dursley get back."
"All right, I'm surprised though that Aunt Petunia didn't even wake me up. You know? To warn me not to do any funny business while she's gone."
"Ahh well, something must of changed her mind." Remus said with a mischievous smirk, before he suddenly switched the focus back to why he came. "So, were you able to think of a safeguard memory?"
"Um, yeah. Took me a while though, but I found one. It's when me and-"
"Don't tell me your memory Harry! Let me test it and we'll see if it's a good one."
"Test it? How you're going to do that? Should I just…think about it? My memory I mean."
"Yes. Think about it hard. I want you to concentrate only on that one memory. If you've picked a good memory, one that doesn't have that many attachments to other memories, then I'll think we'll do fine." At Harry's confused look he further explained what he meant. "For example, if your memory was about creating your Patronus, then that memory might lead me to memories of me teaching you that charm, or actual memories of you battling against a Dementor."
"Oh right." Harry merely said, wondering if the memory he had chosen would be all right.
"Don't worry about it Harry. It usually takes some time before someone come up with a sufficient safeguard memory. The thing to realise is that it's nearly impossible to have a memory that doesn't relate to anything else you've done. You would have to physically create a situation to have a memory that doesn't. Short of sitting in a room by yourself for sometime…I'm not really sure what else you could do to. It's best to just choose a memory you feel that wont remind you of too many things and practice with it.
"Ok? Let's get started then. Just remember to concentrate on that one memory as hard as you can and we'll see. All I'm going to do is look at what you've chosen, I won't even try to delve deeper into your mind just yet. So, don't try to fight me, just concentrate. Concentrate hard."
'Legilimens!'
Harry suddenly felt content.
Here he was with his friend laying peacefully in the sun. They had nothing to do but only relax. It was strange, he felt like he was actually there, reliving the same memory that he knew happened so long ago. He could feel the cool air on his face and even read the small print of the book Hermione had left open from her earlier studies, but the memory ended all to soon for Harry to really look about.
Nonetheless, when it faded away he realised he had shut his eyes and a small smile was playing across his face.
"Well done Harry. I must commend you on an excellent choice of one of your memories. I could really feel the peacefulness of that time; you were a lot younger in that memory weren't you? Was that before I taught you?"
"Yeah it was before all this…trouble started."
It was before the veil was roughly taken away from his eyes, he thought to himself sadly.
"Ok Harry, now I'm going to try and look for your other memories. I don't want you to fight it. I just want you to know what it feels like when someone's trying to get through your safeguard memory, and actually breaches it."
"Ready? Legilimens!"
He was on the floor, his head resting against a cloak he had folded up to prop against the tree's base. Hermione was next to him laying on her side with her eyes closed; her hand was lightly skimming the surface of her book, feeling the rough worn texture of the pages under her soft finger tips. But out of the corner of his eye he noticed something strange that distracted him. It was as if the landscape around him was pealing away like on a painter's canvas.
Gradually a darker surface could be seen, and all around him things were changing, students near him were walking faster then they should, as if someone just hit fast forward on a video player. Hermione and Ron were no longer next to him and he suddenly found himself alone in a room, a dark cupboard. He blinked rapidly, the sudden move had disoriented him, but as soon as he opened his eyes again he was once more standing in front of Remus, in the Dursleys front room.
"That was good for a while, but I think I managed to get through; though I wasn't sure what I was seeing. All I could feel was that you was very lonely and miserable. Where was that? When was that actually?"
All Harry did was point to the cupboard under the stairs. He had to sit down as a wave of tiredness suddenly swept across him, sapping his energy. He watched Remus through bleary eyes walk over to the door he pointed at, and saw him open the door to find his small mattress that still resided there, but was now somewhat surrounded and covered by boxes and cleaning appliances. Remus quickly looked back at Harry, disbelieving, but gradually putting the dots together.
"They...no, they couldn't have. Harry tell me they didn't..." Remus drifted into silence, too shocked to say anything. Harry didn't dare to look him in the eye; instead his focus was now on the floor in front of him.
"I-I think I should go. Harry I can't stay here, I can't focus…those Dursleys! If they came back right now I'd… I-I…I don't know what I'd do-." said Remus, his voice breaking as he felt both distress and anger for Harry's upbringing.
Harry wordlessly nodded, and vaguely heard the front door open and close. It was strange, he hadn't thought about his cupboard in such a long time, and even then he never felt like he did now. He always thought of his cupboard as a safe haven from the Dursleys, his own personal space, but now…now he wasn't sure.
Remus said to use a memory that didn't link to anything, and he thought he did, but how could have Remus seen his memories of his cupboard? The only way he could think of was that his feelings must have had been the same in both memories. But if that was true, why did Remus think he was lonely and miserable? He had nothing else to compare his life against back then, so he shouldn't have felt any different. Unless using legilimency revealed something that he had buried deeply inside of himself. Maybe locked up under lies he had tricked himself into believing to live in such conditions? Or if he really was truthful to himself, did he always long for another life back then? A life like Dudley's perhaps? He didn't know, but right now hefelt the loneliest he had ever felt before.
"I allowed you to stay here by yourself and you couldn't even do the washing up for me!"
The shrill voice of his Aunt shouting next to him was enough to shock him out of whatever disheartening state he was in just moments ago.
"I'll be tiding up here so you better make sure upstairs, including your bedroom is spotless. We saw Natalie in the shopping centre today didn't we Diddy dearest?"
Harry looked behind him to see his cousin leaning against the door with a smug expression. He was seemingly tapping one foot unconcernedly against the floor, but Harry knew he was trying to draw his attention to his new trainers, just to try and make him jealous. He didn't really care, but some small part of him couldn't help wondering if Aunt Petunia would give him Dudley's old pair. It had been a long time since she'd given him any of Dudley's old cast offs.
Shaking his head dismissively he turned back to his Aunt wondering where this was going.
"She's such a sweet girl. She should be wanting to visit my Diddy dums not you." Said Aunt Petunia with a frown, which only deepened when Harry laughed. Now that he knew Tonks would be coming round later he couldn't help, but feel better, and the fact that his own Aunt liked someone magical, made it all the better. Of course she didn't know that Tonks was Natalie, but he wouldn't tell her that anytime soon.
She was just about to say something, and from her reddened cheeks he didn't think it was going to be anything nice, when Hedwig flew through the open kitchen window and landed on the counter top that was currently between him and his Aunt with a letter.
"Take that damn infernal bird with you upstairs now!"
He was already out the door with Hedwig on his shoulder and up the stairs before his Aunt had even finished shouting. Her heated last words, something along the lines of 'your lucky that Vernon isn't here,' were smothered by his bedroom door.
He quickly gave Hedwig some water and an owl treat before he ripped open the letter he had received.
Dear Harry
I'm glad you're keeping your promise and writing to me; I really do worry about you Harry, especially when you're at the Dursleys. Hopefully you'll be with the others soon, at you know where.
I'm trying to persuade my dad not to take us on holiday this year so I can wait for you there, but he wants me to spend more time with him and my mum this summer. We've been invited somewhere I really don't want to go to, I'd much rather spend most of my summer with you and Ron.
I think you should take Hagrid's class Harry. It might be a danger to your health, but you do better with it, then in Astronomy, and you actually learn something unlike in Divinations. Honestly, you should have dropped it when I did.
Well write me back soon Harry,
Luv Hermione
He wasn't expecting Hermione to reply so quickly, but he didn't mind, he welcomed the distraction. At least now he had a second opinion on what subject to take for his NEWTs. Hagrid would be happy that he was taking his subject still, though he wondered if that meant Hermione was taking it as well. He wasn't sure about Ron, but he thought they wouldn't give up Hagrid's class either.
He had just finished writing his reply to Hermione, and had started his usual letter to the Order when the doorbell rang.
'Good, Tonks is here,' he thought to himself. Knowing his Aunt was going to make him get the door anyway, he left his letter for later, and went to answer the door before his aunt bellowed for him.
It really was amazing he thought how Tonks could change her entire bubbly attitude to fit the obviously shy character of Natalie. Once again her brown hair was dangling over her face acting like the self-made barrier protecting her from the world. When she spoke it was almost like a gentle whisper that you had had to strain your ears to hear properly. He wondered if this particular quality made his Aunt like her even more. At least the thought of her being anything to do with magic never crossed her mind; at the most Harry supposed Aunt Petunia had only really been in the loud presence of the Weasleys.
With her whispering light voice, Natalie told Aunt Petunia that Mrs Figg had invited her around for some tea. As soon as his Aunt was out the house Nat's already familiar brown hair was merging softly into the shocking pink of Tonks' funky cool hairstyle.
"Tonks! What about Dudley? He might see you!"
"Your cousin? He's off smoking with his gang of 'big boys'; saw them in the park on the way over. Cat calls and wolf whistles. They sure make a girl feel so wanted." She ended sarcastically.
'Dudley, Dudley, Dudley' he thought to himself, 'he couldn't understand how his cousin could get away with so much.'
"Oh before I forget here's your work back, McGonagall's marked it." Said Tonks pulling a bundle of work out a small handbag. Harry's forehead crinkled slightly in confusion, he hadn't noticed she was carrying one before.
"McGonagall said it was done really well, just a few mistakes here and there. Oh and she wants you to make sure you understand the theory for this years transfiguration projects. So that means Mr Potter, actually reading your school books before the term starts." Tonks said in a pretty good imitation of McGonagall.
"I know you'll do your best anyways. It'll have to be if you want to become an Auror. Besides with the Death Eaters becoming more bold since You-Know-Who's been properly revealed to the Ministry, we really need Auror's that know their stuff. It's not just normal MLE duty anymore, it's going to be life and death." Said Tonks growing sombre.
Harry didn't need to be told about Death Eaters and Voldemort. He knew he was back, hell he was even expecting it last year, but the way Tonks talked made it really seem like things had really started to go terrible in the Wizarding world.
"Fudge should have listened to me. I told him Voldemort was back. I bloody had to duel the bastard! As if I wanted more attention then I already had. It was that damn paper that said I did, all last year, twisting my words Hermione said. I told Dumbledore and I told Fudge to his face that he was back, but he didn't even believe me because he was too afraid of what it meant. Bet he's wetting himself now since the most of the same lot of Death Eaters I named where caught at the ministry. Had to take him bloody seeing him before he believed me, didn't it?"
"That's what I don't understand Harry, if you had names…then why didn't Fudge believe you? I heard you came back pretty messed up from wherever you got portkeyed to, and what happened to the other kid with you; well that should have been enough evidence."
Harry closed his eyes to try and stop the unbidden image of Cedric coming to the forefront of his mind.
"Fudge believed that Dumbledore wanted to take his job, and what I said was just a lie to make him look stupid. He was too afraid to believe that Voldemort could be back to destroy the relative peace the Wizarding community had built up since his last reign. He just blamed the whole thing on the delusional state of Barty Crouch Junior instead. He took the easy way instead of doing what was right."
"If he listened to you and Dumbledore then we'd be one up on those Death Eaters. Instead he's putting pressure on us now to make it seem like he's actually doing something." She said shaking her head angrily.
"Well he managed to get everyone believing I was a liar. Even people at Hogwarts thought I made it up, especially Umbridge. I wish I'd seen her face when she found out I was telling the truth."
"Yeah I'd hate to have been in your position last year; I can't even imagine her controlling Hogwarts. She's blind! She'll follow the Ministry to her death, not to mention get rid of anyone who's standing in Fudge's way."
"You don't have to tell me that. I'd doubt she let me become an Auror, even if I get the grades. She was quite adamant that she wouldn't let me become one as long as Fudge was Minister. That's why this whole thing with McGonagall started." Harry said with a frown marring his features.
"I'd be surprised to see that old bat try and stop you from becoming an Auror. She's crazy now, got lost in the forbidden forest at the end of your school term or something. Fudge won't even believe her stories about being chased by a horde of Centaurs. He's chalked it up as another one of her excuses to get rid of them permanently."
Harry joined Tonks laughing, however not for the same reasons as Tonks thought. Hermione can be equally as ruthless as the next person when she's pushed to it.
"Besides, if by some fluke she manages to stop you, I'll take you on." At Harry's confused look she went on. "I've nearly finished my mentorship with Kingsley, and by the time you've finished Hogwarts, I'd say I'd probably have enough experience working on my own. I could become your instructor for your first year and then your mentor when you pass the exams. I'd have to take a pay cut, and half my duties probably, but that wouldn't make a difference to what Fudge's doing to me now."
"Y-you'd do that for me?" Harry asked surprised that she would do that for him; however it still only took him a couple seconds to realize what she fully said.
"Course I-"
"Wait! What's Fudge doing to you?" Harry asked interrupting Tonks.
"What? Oh! Fudge found out I was in the Department of Mysteries when you were there. Since all the other Auror's came later and where all in the atrium, he thought I knew that there was going to be an attack at the Ministry beforehand. Of course he can't officially prove it."
"He's a fool! The Ministry should be using every Auror they have tracking down the Death Eaters and Voldemort before they can do anything to harm anyone."
"Well that's what I told him, but he still accused me of hiding secrets and wanted to suspend my duty, practically fire me! Luckily Kingsley pointed out that one of the Death Eaters I helped to catch was Lucius Malfoy. That shut him up, but he put me on escort duty, no excitement there."
"I can't believe it, but what about Kingsley? Did he get in trouble?"
"Kingsley? No way! Fudge thinks he's front and centre. Serving the Ministry without a thought. Besides, Fudge knows Kingsley holds a lot of sway within the Auror's, so he thinks if he keeps Kingsley happy then he's closer to controlling the MLE."
Harry knew Fudge was blinded by the power he had by being The Minister of Magic. He must be really paranoid to think Dumbledore wanted the job even after he turned it down, but Harry still didn't think Fudge was really stupid. No, he was just greedy. He knew Madam Bones ran the MLE. He remembered she was at his hearing and seemed fair enough to actually listen to him. Wouldn't it be ironic if she took Fudge's job right under his nose whilst Fudge himself wanted to add her power to his? Harry couldn't help smirking to himself.
"How's Remus?" Harry asked, abruptly changing the subject. Just talking a little bit about the Department of Mysteries had made him feel slightly uncomfortable. Though he did try to ignore the feeling whist Tonks told him some valuable information.
Since being at Privet Drive meant also being in information limbo, he was glad Tonks was here to tell him what was happening in the Wizarding world. Even if what Tonks told meant the chance of those depressing feelings rushing back to him.
Sometimes he believed he had dealt with the memory of Sirius and the whole stupid fiasco at the Ministry, but some part of him felt that those memories were always floating just there upon his consciousness. Sometimes the feelings were so strong and unrelenting, they made him think of these passionate imaging's, where he would exact their vengeance upon the ones that had caused such a thing to happen.
"He was feeling kind of shaken earlier, nothing to worry about though." She said whilst shaking her head slowly, effectively changing her hair from shocking pink to blood red. "It doesn't matter. The latest full moon is probably taking more out of him. What do you think?" She asked indicating her hair.
Harry only shrugged and waited for Tonks to continue talking.
"That's why I came actually. Remus said he was going to drop in on you today, but when I had to go to Grimmauld Place he was there, rambling on about something to do with the Dursleys to himself. Well I think he said something about the Dursley, I didn't really want to interrupt him. I checked on the Dursleys whilst they were out to see if anything was up, but everything seemed fine. I didn't even have to remind your Aunt about the invitation McGonagall got for me to come here either. Though I think she was trying to get me to spend time with her son and not you. It's too bad that Natalie so naïve, she doesn't know the first thing about boyfriends." She said with a mischievous smile.
For the next few days Harry was flying a high he had never felt at Privet Drive. Of course that was because of the praise he had received from Professor McGonagall, not anything to do with the Dursleys. Harry had in the days since Tonks last visited, looked through the marked work he had had received back from his professor. Unlike the essays he had done for her during the school term, these were returned with small paragraphs of ways to improve, and encouragements to continue his studies on his own.
"Pig!"
The tiny owl of Ron's flew full pelt through Harry's open window, glided once around the room before diving into land next to Harry. He had been sitting on his bed with his old charms textbook, but now he was currently trying to calm the small owl down.
"Come on! Hold still you stupid thing!"
The sharp intelligent stare from Hedwig was enough to mellow the fur ball enough for him to take the letter from Ron away from the owl. He quickly took one of Hedwig's owl treats and threw the owl back out of the window with it. He'd send a reply back later to Ron and give Hedwig the usual Order letter to take at the same time.
Hey mate
How's the Muggles treating you? Remember Moody's only an owl away if they've forgotten the warning already. Well boring here, but mum says Dumbledore's going to get you out soon.
Ron
Even with the visits from Remus and Tonks he was still happy to hear that he might be leaving Privet Drive soon. Though he had to admit his Aunt had been treating him better and his Uncle had all but ignored him and Dudley was…well, Dudley still.
There was a sharp knock against the Dursley's front door.
Harry didn't notice, but he had held his breath while he looked to see who it was. He thought he knew who it might be and he wasn't let down. It must have been Remus who had told Mrs Figg to invite his Aunt over for the day. He had the house to himself again, and another perfect chance to practice Occlumency.
As Remus entered the Dursleys household he took one long look at the cupboard under the stairs before he closed the hall door, blocking it from his view. He never once said or asked anything about why Harry might have been kept under the stairs, but from the expression on his face it was clear to Harry that it greatly pained and angered him equally.
"Do you remember what exactly happened to your safeguard memory just before I managed to break through it?"
The abrupt question from Remus spoke volumes to Harry shocking him from his thoughts. He knew now that Remus meant business today. He was going to learn Occlumency and it seemed like it'll be the only thing they'd do until he got it right.
"I think…the memory sort of started to peal away, like it was crumbling or something. Things where changing, like some people I can't remember seeing before started moving really fast. I don't know how to explain it…" Harry said drifting off into silence, he hadn't thought about what happened to him since Remus last came, it was really hard to remember what actually happened. He did however try to relax each night before he went to bed. From what the book said, clearing his mind by visualizing his safeguard memory was the right thing to do.
"That's a good enough explanation. That's mostly what I expected you to remember, try and never forget what happened. Every time someone's trying to force their mind into yours by using Legilimens something like that will happen.
"The less noticeable the deterioration of your safeguard memory, before you feel your self become pulled under by the flow of your memories, will depend on how powerful and adept a Legilimens is at attacking you.
"I want to teach you how to feel when someone's trying to burrow into your mind, and how to identify subtle changes in your safeguard memory. It's best to keep your safeguard memory to your self. The less people that know, the less chance of a Legilimens realising that they really haven't gained access into your mind.
"By all means a Legilimens without any real purpose will usually explore your safeguard memory without knowing you formed it for that reason, thus opening us to a vast range of possibilities. Right now you should only be interested in repelling any intruders out of your mind, therefore protecting it. Although, when you become more experienced in the future, if that situation arises, you may attempt to explore your attackers mind, as each person whilst using Legilimens leave their own mind open to a counter attack."
He paused staring at Harry intently to make sure he understood everything he had just said.
"Each time you are concentrating on your safeguard memory, I want you to be aware of your surroundings. I've seen your memory for myself, and I know there are many things that can change without you knowing, but if you want to be adept enough at this skill you must focus on each and everything equally. If you do so you will notice straight away when someone is intruding. If you can achieve this to a high degree, then you may find the next step easier."
"All right, what's the next step though?"
"Actually forcing the person out of your mind, but I wont digress anymore then I have already, we really shouldn't get ahead of ourselves. I'm going to cast Legilimens on you now; I've done enough explaining so you should understand what you have to do. When you see a change in your memory tell me to stop and I'll halt the spell ok?"
"Yeah." Harry said simply wanting to get on with it.
"Remember to concentrate like you did before."
Harry concentrated on his chosen memory and nodded to Remus that he was ready; as he blinked he was already sitting down next to Ron in the same trees shadow.
He could once again feel the cool air on his face, but for now he ignored that and he cast his gaze across the Hogwarts ground, searching for something out of the ordinary. This time he noticed Hermione was reading her textbook, but every time he looked down at the pages he noticed they hadn't changed. This must be before Hermione fell asleep; he thought to himself absentmindedly.
He was still searching for something that would indicate Remus's presence in his mind, when out of the corner of his eye he could just make out the sky was rapidly changing from blue to black. He couldn't help hesitating a moment prior to shouting out for Remus to stop. Strangely enough, only his mouth formed the words before he was ripped straight away from Hogwarts, and he was back once again in the Dursleys house with Remus standing in front of him.
He glanced at the clock on the wall; he was surprised to find that had taken him nearly half an hour to notice the subtle changes Remus had been talking about.
"How comes it took so long for something to change? Last time you did it, it was much faster."
"Last time I was only testing your memory, but this time, and also each time in the future I'll be doing it how a Legilimens might try to intrude into your mind without you knowing."
Maybe it wasn't just the fact that he took so long to notice a change happening, it probably was because Remus was experiences with Legilimens instead. That could why it took the time that it did to actually see something different, he thought to himself.
"What did you see changing this time?"
"The sky started to change like it was growing darker. Almost as if it was going into night time when it was practically afternoon a moment ago."
Remus nodded, "You do understand what you have to look for right?" He continued, taking Harry's silence as a yes. "Well we're going to keep doing this same thing until you become better at recognising that something changed. There's no point moving on until you get better at this. Right now if you stay at this level by the time you've realised someone's in your mind, they'll have all the information they'd need, and you wouldn't have even known to stop them."
Remus held his wand out in front of him, signalling Harry to prepare.
"Legilimens."
Remus worked Harry long and hard throughout the day, and Harry was quite sure Remus would have continued still further if it weren't for his aunt coming back. Harry thought something else must have happened to do with Voldemort, Remus had never been the one to push so hard to make him learn a skill. When he was teaching him how to do the Patronus Charm back in his third year, it was himself he remembered who had wanted to continue, even if he was exhausted to the point of collapsing.
The only excuse for the reason why the different teaching techniques he could come up with, was that learning the Patronus Charm was also physically dangerous thanks to the Bogart Dementor. He supposed Remus somehow knew how much his mind could take. Before when it was with the Bogart, the dark creature took his strongest fear and used it against him and he could actually feel the affects physically. The numbing coldness of his terror and anxiety must have been much worse to watch at his younger age.
He had almost begun to really notice an intrusion into his mind by the end of it all after a few minutes. Though he didn't know if that was good enough yet. Remus would only say that he did well enough to get to the level he was at already, considering how he had started.
Harry just couldn't understand how anyone could be aware of each and every subtle difference that could take place within a memory. Part of him wanted to choose a smaller a memory something that wasn't on par with the size of Hogwarts grounds, but he knew Remus wouldn't want to start again. Besides neither did he, he reckoned in the long run having a multipart memory like this one as a safeguard memory might trick any Legilimens into taking the time to explore it more then they needed too. Though he wasn't sure if he wanted to use that time to delve into anyone else's mind, most importantly if it was Voldemort's.
Well he wouldn't think about that now. He was supposed to be clearing his mind of all thoughts before he went to bed. He had to strengthen his mental defences, if he didn't, then he'd be at the mercy of Voldemort and his mental attacks.
Potions. Without Snape, he could concentrate and understand reasonably well what he would have to do to make a simple potion convincingly well. When it came to the actual brewing, he supposed the colour might be a bit off, but nevertheless he felt more confident that he could do it. However without Snape, he was bored. Not being wary of the Potions Master around him and his childish insults really did allow you to see how potions was boring on it's own; especially without being able to go through the method while he learned the recipe. Plus he was starting to find the same problem with Transfiguration. No matter how many times he read McGonagall's notes on what's they'd be doing this new year, it never stuck! The theory work just went right over his head without seeing at least a proper demonstration, not to mention the warnings of problems to look out for whilst attempting a transformation just plainly didn't make any sense.
"Harry, it's Natalie."
For the first time ever he thought to himself, the fates must have been listening to him, and taken pity and provided a distraction. Of course if he was thinking cynically instead, then the fates where distracting him from doing something that might save his life one day.
All the Dursleys were in the house, so Harry called down to Tonks, inviting her into his bedroom so that they could have more privacy together. Harry didn't want his Aunt or his Uncle in that case finding out a Witch had tricked them into letting her come into their home without them knowing. Besides he thought to himself he'd probably get blamed or at least shouted at for not telling them. So if he told them the truth, either way the outcome would still be the same, shouted at followed by insults of a freakish behaviour, and if they saw Tonk's special ability in person he was quite sure it'd be a lot worse.
With a cheerful smile Harry greeted Tonks as she walked into his bedroom, and in the time it took for her to shut door, she was no longer the shy Natalie, but the bubbly Tonks with shocking pink hair to boot.
"Tonks, you know you said you was born a Metamorphmagus, how did you first find out you could do something like that? I mean how'd you know?" Asked Harry before Tonks could pick up where they left off talking about Quidditch. That was still a sore point for Harry, and he didn't really want listen to Tonks latest tirades on a broom, since his own one had been taking away from him last year.
"Well my dad once cut my hair himself instead of taking me to the hairdressers. He said it would be simple enough for him to do, since he watched it being cut so many times before, but it came out really terrible. He tried getting my hair even on both sides and ended up cutting it shorter and shorter." As Tonks was saying this, she amusingly made her own hair get smaller and smaller. "I was eight at the time, I think actually refused to leave the room, even when my dad was trying to take me to a proper hairdressers. Though that's not the kicker. My mum was coming back from shopping and you should have seen his face. Completely frightened, I'm sure he was just about to collapse right where he was standing. I suppose that was what started me off, seeing how anguished he was, all paled at what my mum might say. Just as my mum was about to come in my hair was back to how it was. Just like that, well, a bit shorter then it was so it looked like I went to the hairdressers. I think that's how it happens, how you know you've got the ability; it's to do with your subconscious acting out."
Harry couldn't help laughing. There wasn't much he knew about Tonk's dad, but from what she just said he sounded like a good person. Well he must have been to sway a Black away from her family, a momentous decision to choose between. The person you think you might spend the rest of your life with or your family.
"When you change your features and your hair doesn't it hurt you?"
"It doesn't really hurt when I change my hair anymore, but that's probably just because I've been doing it since I was younger.
"I never knew about what I could do until I got into Hogwarts you know. I think it was either my third or forth year when Sprout noticed me messing around, changing my hair colour with out my wand. She told me to talk to McGonagall about what I was doing. Of course there aren't that many of us around, so she could only give me a couple of books to read through to learn more about this strange skill I had.
"By that time I had already been experimenting with making myself look different. Sometimes I did it consciously like when I wanted to look better for a boy, or other times I did it and I didn't even notice. I think that was why I could always wake up looking good no matter how little I slept the night before. Like when my friends started going through puberty before me I used to... err well that's another story for later I think." She said with a wily smile.
"The point I'm trying to make is that over time it gets easier, just like everything else in life, practice makes perfect. I'm still even now having trouble accessing my full abilities, and it does take a lot out of me sometimes to just change all my hair, but I'm use to willing the change to stay so it's like second nature to forget my tiredness.
"Changing your hair is the easiest part of Metamorphmagi because your hairs physically not alive, but changing your body is really difficult. Changing your bone structure is as hard as changing the rest of your body parts, so I don't normally attempt it, only when I'm training myself or if it's really important for undercover work. If I change my face to make myself look much older I usually just act the rest of the part." She finished with a modest smile.
Tonks is really one of a kind. Here she has this extraordinary skill where she could be anything she wanted, but she didn't let that go to her head. She really worked hard with the skill and made it her own.
"You change yourself a lot don't you? I mean you change yourself like you change your clothes; can you even remember what you used to look like?"
"What? You know that's not the sort of thing to ask Harry."
"I-I…forget I said-" Harry tried to splutter out an apology, but Tonks didn't give him the chance.
"It's all right Harry, you just surprised me. No one's really asked me that so bluntly before."
She held up her hand to stop Harry from apologising, and gave him an appraising look before she silently closed her eyes. She appeared to relax completely, and like a wave across water her face gracefully changed. The main difference in how she looked now came from the fact that she normally kept her hair short and spiky, but right now it was just below her shoulders. Her face was a bit different as well, but nevertheless the same pale heart-shaped face was there, albeit a little more sharper, and her ever-shining dark eyes were just that darker, with small specks of light brown radiating from the centre.
Harry didn't notice the small gasp that escaped his lips; he only asked if she remembered, and here she was actually showing him her true self he presumed.
"I... when I first joined the Auror's, no one took me seriously because I still looked like I should be going to Hogwarts. You know a young tom boy sort of girl who loves quidditch," she said slightly sadly. "I didn't age normally after I was seventeen you see that was when my powers really started to kick in. It was worse as well because I took after my mum and she was a late bloomer, so I knew the changes that should have happened eventually in my last years at Hogwarts just went much slower. I think its because my body doesn't age like most people.
"So when I first started Auror training, I didn't look a day over seventeen, and being one of the youngest Witches who ever managed to past the Auror entry exams made that age gap look even worse. It didn't take me long to discover that most of the guys didn't respect me because I didn't look mature enough to be an Auror, so they didn't take me seriously at all. I didn't know how long it would take for that to happen naturally, so I changed my appearance. Most people didn't believe I was the same girl straight out of Hogwarts, and you imagine how many people actually talked to me like a real person, a proper adult. That was when I really made people start to call me Tonks instead of my middle name. It annoys me that they couldn't see how hard I worked to become an Auror, instead of just at face value."
"So no one knows what you really look like anymore?" Harry asked quietly feeling sad for his friend.
"Well most of the mates I still stay in touch with from school might remember what I looked like, but other then them, Dumbledore, Shakelbolt and now you I suppose would have a clear vision of my youthful beauty. " She said.
Harry thought Tonks must have been feeling a bit more comfortable enough to joke about showing her true self. He watched her walk across to his wardrobe and strike a model type pose; her shoulder pointing to the mirror and her face tilted slightly up. Though it didn't last as a deep frown marred her features.
"God I'm ugly, who would want to meet me when I'm looking like this." She said to the mirror throwing longer hair up in frustration.
Harry didn't know what she was talking about, but he got up from where he was sitting and turned Tonks around, sticking out his hand smiling.
"Harry Potter, nice to meet you."
It took Tonks a few seconds to catch on, before she reached out to shake the hand Harry had offered and responded likewise, with a semi formal curtsy.
"Nymphadora Tonks, but don't call me Nymphadora."
"Well we'll just have to settle for Dora then. Adorable-dora that is."
Tonks gave a mock scowl and punched him lightly on the arm, whilst she mumbled something that sounded like 'at least that's better then Nymphadora.'
Harry wasn't deluding himself anymore, what started merely as a distraction in his depressing times, had now in his thoughts turned into an expectation his professor wanted him to continue with throughout the school year, not just here whilst in Privet Drive. He really didn't know what was worse, the expectation that he'd do well or the nagging to actually do better then he normally did.
A letter earlier in day from McGonagall told him he wasn't purely exaggerating the feelings he had been having lately. It definitely wasn't him just searching for an excuse to get out of studying more then he usually did each summer. Now that Tonks and Remus came to visit sometimes, he had all the distraction's he needed this summer, so unlike last summer he didn't feel completely isolated.
He wanted to stop studying all together, but he knew McGonagall would be disappointed in him. She had made a promise to help him become an Auror and that wouldn't happen if he didn't try his best. So after studying for most of the day, Harry had come downstairs early for dinner, when he heard his Aunt and Uncle talking heatedly through the hall door.
"…But I don't understand why we had to get ready dear, why won't you just let me cook a nice home meal."
"This is important Petunia, if we get this deal we can start looking for a holiday home in Majorca, and I'm not letting the boy foul it up again for us. I hope you haven't forgotten what he did last time we were in this position Petunia."
"Your right Vernon. I assume that means we'll be leaving the boy here for the night then. What about Dudley?"
"Yes, yes can't forget Dudders, the Wrights have a daughter Dudley's age that'll be coming as well. He'll just turn on the ol' charm and we'll have that contract!"
"I'll go and tell him to get ready then dear."
"Good, good, we've got plenty of time, but its always first-rate to turn up early. It shows we're interested in the well being of the deal going smoothly."
"Yes Vernon, I'll speak to the boy while I'm upstairs too."
Harry missed what his Uncles reply was as he ran back up the stairs quietly; he walked back down them casually a moment later to meet up with his Aunt just coming out of the living room. He listened to the usual instructions and warnings; watched his Aunt persuade his cousin to get ready and finally smiled to himself as they left in the car to the restaurant.
He knew they wouldn't be back till late and the prospect of having most of the whole night alone to himself made him feel excited, though the feeling didn't last for long, as there was a sharp knock against his front door.
"Remus! I wasn't expecting you tonight."
"Well the Dursleys just left you alone, so I thought it'd be a good enough time for another Occlumency lesson. You up for it?"
"Yeah sure, ok."
"I thought it would be best if we tried what we started last lesson before we attempted anything new. Just to make sure you still remember what you have to do."
Harry mocked scowled, he remembered, he even wrote down most of everything Remus said, and then compared it with what was in that Occlumency book. So far what Remus had said was on par with what was in the book, albeit a lot less complex, but with Remus's summary like information, he thought he'd be able to perform much better now that he had more of a grasp on the theory. Plus he was itching at getting the chance to actually attempt pushing Remus out of his mind.
"Remember Harry concentrate on your safeguard memory, ready?"
"Legilimens!"
Harry found himself watching Hermione gracefully awaken from her slumber; he thought it was funny how she stretched out her legs and arms before with a small breath she opened her eyes to the world in front of her.
"Stop!" He had just seen out of the corner of his eye a student from the lower years begin to falter backwards oddly a step before continuing on as if nothing strange had happened.
"I must say you've surprised me. I'm sure that was faster then anytime you've managed to notice my presence in your safeguard memory. Well done!" he paused letting the complement sink in before he moved on, "I think it'll be quite safe to move on to the next step. Next time when you notice my presence don't tell me to stop or don't give away that you realise I'm there. Gradually, as the changes start to happen focus on making the memory act how it's supposed to."
Harry nodded, taking in what he was supposed to do next.
"Are you ready to try it? Do you understand what you should do?"
"I'm ready, go on." Said Harry, determined.
With only a nod of his head, Remus gripped his wand tighter and said the spell.
Harry was momentarily confused, he was by himself standing under the same tree, he tried looking around, but he couldn't see Hermione or Ron near him. A part of him started to panic with the overwhelming feeling of loneliness that had suddenly crept up upon him.
All around him the other students where disappearing and the sky was darkening, almost suffocating him, making him feel like he was being enclosed into a small box. He tried to focus on his safeguard memory, to return it to how it used to be, but abruptly a scream shattered his concentration and a silence that he never noticed had descended upon the school grounds. Across the lawn he watched wide-eyed as an enormous, pale-eyed, jet-black dog was dragging Ron away.
Instantly he forgot what he was supposed to do as the memory took him over and he found himself chasing after Ron. Suddenly he was brought back to the Dursleys front room, if Remus had left him in his memory for a split second longer, he would have felt the excruciating pain of one of the Whomping Willows branches striking him across the head.
"What was you feeling as you saw that memory Harry?" Remus enquired.
"I don't know, sadness, I thought Buckbeak had just been murdered and I was afraid for Ron. He'd just been taken from us by the Grim. Well I thought it was the Grim then." He said, his mind still on the memory.
"What would you say was the dominating feeling at that time, your fear or the sadness of your loss?"
"The fear. It was happening right then and I didn't know what was going on, just that I had to get after them. Why are you asking me this? It's not important I just messed up! Come on, I'm ready. Say the spell again now!"
"It's very important! It's all to do with the next step. If anyone ever manages to get through your safeguard memory, focus on the main emotion your feeling at that time. Once you've isolated it, ignore it completely. Once your concentration not taken over and your no longer caught up in your memory, you can push your intruder out of your mind or set a trap for them. It all depends on how much energy has been taken out of you by seeing the same memories the intruder managed to witness. Don't mess around when someone's in your mind and try to do something beyond your knowledge or experience. Your mind's a precious delicate thing, and trying to trap a Legilimens can lead to a worse outcome then merely letting the intruder rape your mind of any secrets. It could leave you in St Mungo's for life.
"If you understand, now we'll do it again."
Harry nodded, planting his feet firmly on the ground so if Remus managed to break through his safeguard memory again, he wouldn't fall over.
"Legilimens!"
He tried to fight against the sky; it was already growing darker as he just joined the memory. He was by himself, but he concentrated, he concentrated hard and he thought he had managed to will back a student into his memory, but it had already changed. It was Hermione, she was chasing Ron's dragging form across the school grounds and he found himself chasing after her.
Anguish suddenly leaped through him as he witnessed Hermione knocked to the ground by the Whomping Willow, but he didn't have long to work on those emotions. As suddenly he felt his sight begin to cloud over as the memory unusually speeded up until he was now within the Shrieking Shack itself. His anguish he felt only moments ago had now been overpowered by the utmost anger he had ever felt. Here he wanted to inflict pain, no magic, just his own strength.
He tried to concentrate on that one emotion, but it was too much for him. He couldn't stop it from playing out, and he suddenly found himself staring back into the face of Remus.
"It was harder this time," Harry muttered.
"I know, this step is much bigger then the one before. We can stop for tonight-"
"No! Again."
"All right Harry, remember to concentrate, not just on trying to keep your safeguard memory from collapsing, but concentrate hard on the strongest emotion. Ok? Ready?"
"Legilimens!"
It went on like that; on and on until he could finally identify each emotion he was feeling, and disregard the strongest one so he could concentrate on pushing Remus out of his mind.
Even with the help from the Occlumency book he found Remus experienced self too advanced to actually have a high succeed rate at managing to push him out of his mind. He knew however that all he really needed was more chances at practicing the technique, he thought to himself, before Remus shocked him from his musings.
"Harry, this was probably our last lesson, I can't teach you anymore. You've already managed to strengthen your mental shields to notice my presence, and you've managed to quickly catch on to how to push me out of your mind. You might not think I was trying Harry, but I really was seeking to delve into your mind those couple last times.
"I know I shouldn't be surprised, since I watched you develop your own skills on performing the Patronus Charm in a quite short time too, considering your age, but Harry, you've already learned the main basics I planned to teach you originally." He stopped when he noticed Harry's sort of happy expression. "I know that's a good thing, but your still not up to the level to stop an accomplished Legilimens from braking through your safeguard memory. That's why I think you have no choice...but to ask Professor Snape to teach you again."
"Remus! You can't be serious; he hates me and the feelings are mutual. McGonagall already wants me to take potions with him, and I don't want to be around him longer then I need to if I get in! I'd rather teach myself how to learn it!"
"You're good, clearly better then you were before, but you're still relying on being able to see your safeguard memory to know when someone probing your mind. If someone tries legilimency on you in the future, you'll be completely open to an attack, because right now you can't focus on two things at once. The werewolf in me take cares of my mind, I take care of my body. That's what you have to learn to be able to effectively block a Legilimens attack, and I won't help you anymore. I'm just relieved you've got as far as you have without me hurting you. I hope you haven't forgotten the real danger that was involved with me teaching the little that you know now. Snape as much as him being annoying, will be much safer to learn from."
"Snape…safer?" Harry asked incredulously, his anger seeping through him. "There's no way I'm going to beg him to teach me again."
"Don't you see? If you really don't want to be manipulated by Voldemort again and get someone else hurt, you have to!"
Harry suddenly felt dizzy as the breath he took to protest escaped him. His anger evaporated as his brain screamed at him what Remus had just said over and over again. He never thought Remus would go that low to make his point…but he was right. He wasn't ignorant to the truth anymore of why he needed this extra skill. There was no need for anyone to sugarcoat the reasons for him to do this any longer. He had no choice; he would have to ask Snape to teach him again.
"I'll ask him, but I won't put up with his snide remarks. If Snape wants a rise from me, then I'll show him how much I think of him."
Remus simply nodded his head.
"If he takes you back, your lessons wont have anything to do with Hogwarts. Anything you or him do in that classroom will purely be your word against his." Said Remus, giving a weak smile as he noticed Harry's expression. "You should remember however Snape is still a professor and a fully qualified Wizard. His word no matter how much it was tainted by his past will be listened to by most others."
Harry could remember clearly, he was still seen merely as child who didn't know better. That was something he would change. He thought as his reflections travelled to darker areas before Remus spoke again.
"It's a full moon soon, so I'll probably wont see you for a while, and Dumbledore's most likely arranged something to get you out of here by now, so…"
"I'll see you when you recover Remus, you don't have to tell me some great insight that I'll always remember. You've helped me enough already."
To that, Remus gave a small chuckle before handing Harry a small letter. He didn't open just yet, instead he watched as Remus left Privet Drive for the last time that summer.
To say he was surprised was the least he could think of. Right there, perched around his room, were nearly half a dozen owls staring back at him as soon as he walked through the door. Quickly overcoming his temporary shock, Harry went around each one and untied their packages and letters and gave them each an owl treat. Looking quickly at the clock on his wall, Harry noticed it was just past midnight. It was his birthday. It took him quite by surprise; his final lesson with Remus must have gone on for longer then he realised.
Slightly happy that time at Privet Drive had been moving faster than usual, he couldn't help thinking how ironic it was. If it weren't for Dudley snooping around, he would never have found the mirror to talk to Remus through. Still, he wondered what on Earth Dudley was doing back then.
He had almost forgotten about the small letter Remus had just given him in his excitement with his other packages. Taking a few seconds to find where he chucked the thing, he ripped the envelope open, to read the letter inside.
Hello Harry,
Let me be the first to wish you a Happy Birthday!
Don't think I've forgotten your birthday present; Tonks will be around soon with it. I would have given it to you personally today, but unfortunately it wasn't ready yet, and as you know the full moon is approaching.
Don't forget Harry that whilst your at Hogwarts secluded from the world, I'm still here if you need me.
Feel free to use the mirror.
Remus
Once again it seized to amaze him how much Remus appeared to care for him, and he fell into calm remembrance of how his times with Remus went this summer.
It was a large tawny owl swooping down and dropping of a parcel with the Hogwarts' Crest on his bed that reminded Harry of the packages he had to open, and the most brightly wrapped one was just begging to be opened first.
To our faithful benefactor,
On a special occasion, such as ones 16th birthday, what could be better then receiving the latest Weasleys Wizarding Wheezes?
It's so new you can't even buy it yet. Have fun tormenting that cousin for us!
Fred and George
Nestled in the packaging was a large dark brown wand. He didn't understand. Fred and George had got him another wand, well, made him another wand it looked like. This couldn't be one of their fakes wands that turned into a rubber chicken or something like that, it was supposed to be a new invention.
Taking up the wand he rolled it in his hands feeling the weight in his grip. It looked and felt like a normal wand, and it almost felt like his magic was reacting with it somehow.
"Lumos."
Harry said and was shocked to actually see the spell work. Fred and George had somehow managed to create a real wand; He looked at the wand again, this time trying to work out what wood it was and the type of core they used for him, but both were unrecognisable. He would have to ask Fred and George next time he saw them how they managed to make a wand of all things.
"Nox."
Instead of the normal small light that partially illuminated his room turning off; he was greatly taken aback to feel and actually see a wet slimy snake fighting to slither out of his hands, but as soon as he dropped the animal it had turned back into the normal wand it had started off as, with a piece of parchment now attached to it.
'Weasley Misleading Wands' guaranteed to shock and amuse even the strictest witches and wizards it read.
Well Harry thought to himself, so far their guarantee was still intact. He was sure this would be yet another hit for the Weasley twins, especially with all the children who were under eleven who couldn't own a real wand yet.
Chucking down the parchment he stretched over his bed to reach the pile of letters and opened the first one.
Dear Harry,
Happy Birthday!
I think you might find this useful for next year. I thought you'd need something fun for a change. Won't say no more here, but I think you'll know what spell I want to try when we're back in school.
I hope your feeling better; remember I'm there for you if you want to talk.
Hope the Dursleys are still treating you good.
Lov Hermione
P.S hope you like the socks too.
Hermione's letter left Harry quite confused; he wondered what Hermione was talking about, but ignored that just now to open the hard squared package.
Harry wasn't surprised that Hermione had got him a book, it was just what it was about to be more exact, ' A 1001 fascinating spells and potions you wouldn't learn in school', unbelievable really, and what spell was she talking about? He would have to read it later, he thought to himself.
Hi Harry,
I hope you don't mind me owling you. I wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday, and to say thank you for the DA meetings they really helped me. I'm sure everyone did well on his or her exams I think I did. Well I hope you have a good birthday.
Yours Sincerely,
Susan Bones
He read two more unexpected cards from Luna andErnie Macmillan, from Hufflepuff both wishing him a happy birthday, before he saw the familiar sight of Ron's hyperactive owl Pig. Apparently happy that he completed his mission, he was hopping from foot to foot much to Hedwig's annoyance. Managing to catch the little fur ball he took off the parcels tide to him, whilst giving him an owl treat for his measures.
Hey Harry,
Happy Birthday mate, you would have got your presents sooner, but mum wanted too make sure you got the cake she baked for you, don't forget to make a wish she said.
Hope the Muggles are treating you all right.
Ron
P.S Ginny said Happy Birthday, she'd probably give you a birthday kiss too if she could.
P.P.S. Harry, ignore my prat of a big brothers' failure at an attempt of a joke. I was wondering why he wouldn't let me add anything to his letter.
Happy Birthday!
Ginny
Harry couldn't help smiling at Ron and Ginny's sibling antics as he opened first Ron's present, a big box of chocolate frogs, and then Ginny's present. He wasn't expecting to get anything from Ginny; after all he'd never given her a present before. Carefully unwrapping the red and gold paper covering his small present, he was surprised to see a hand painting of what looked like himself, Hermione and Ron sitting under tree by the lake at Hogwarts. It was quite uncanny how much the painting almost matched the memory he used for safeguard.
'I wonder what Trelawney would say about coincidences like this one,' he thought to himself with a small snort of laughter.
Harry was quite sure this was on par with the best present he had ever received, and he really did have to admire the detail in the painting. Forgetting he had one more letter to open he continued to lose himself in the painting, almost feeling the tension in his body relaxing out of him. Silently thanking her for a great present he wondered if she knew how much this painting would mean to him.
The last item was his usual green written Hogwarts sealed letter, informing him of the new books and equipment he would need for his sixth year. The only thing that was different was the last paragraph:
Please send a reply with the chosen subjects you have decided to take for NEWTS studies, selected. If you wish to have extra counselling on which subjects to take depending on the career path you hope to continue in, please send a reply as soon as possible.
Professor McGonagall
He looked at the first of the extra sheets of parchment to find that the subjects McGonagall wanted him to take were already ticked off, except for Care of Magic Creatures, which he quickly did and signed. The last piece of parchment took him quite by surprised, it wasn't that he weren't expecting it; he knew it was coming soon or later; it was just what it actually said.
Here are the results of Harry James Potter Ordinary Wizardry Levels in alphabetical order:
Astronomy: Acceptable
Care of Magical Creatures: Outstanding
Charms: Exceeds Expectations
Defence Against the Dark Arts: Outstanding+
Divination: Poor
Herbology: Acceptable
History Of Magic: Poor
Potions: Outstanding
Transfigurations: Exceeds Expectations
You have receivedseven OWL's Mr Potter, and should be pleased to know you are one in few throughout the years to receive an O+ in Defence Against the Dark Arts due to the vast level of understanding shown in said subject. It has been recorded that the intensity of skill and control surpasses every requirement set to gain an Outstanding at the Ordinary Wizarding Level.
Yours Sincerely,
Griselda Marchbanks
Head of the Wizarding Examinations Authority
He couldn't believe it, he actually did well enough to actually have a chance at becoming an Auror. McGonagall was right, he had actually managed to get an Outstanding in Potions, impossible as it seemed he really did.
However his happiness was short-lived as he found himself staring at his History of Magic grade. He didn't pass that exam, neither did he pass Divinations, but that was expected. What wasn't expected was where he would see the final part of his supposed vision of Sirius being tortured. It finally reached him right in the middle of his History exam.
He cringed at the memory of how Voldemort tricked him, and silently vowed that it would never happen again. He was going to learn as much as he could from Snape about Occlumency, no matter what it took. He was done being used, it was time to take control and do whatever it took to come out of this well.
He took a box of matches out of his desk draw and lit the lone candle on his cake. With one blow he wished this year would be different, not following the gradual deterioration his life had fallen into. It had become a sort of trend where each year no matter how greater the accomplishment that was achieved, what was lost was more noticeable. He wasn't going to let that happen this year; he wasn't going to lose anyone else again.
Author Notes-
Thanks for reading.
As my Beta's MIA, I'll be looking to you to tell me if I've missed anything.
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