Chapter Ten:


It's a good thing Sandy wasn't at school the next day, or I'd have likely bashed her head into a locker or something. Luckily for her, her parents had decided she was leaving for Florida immediately, so she was on a train down to Orlando while I was sitting in science class glaring at her empty seat.

The day went by slowly, and between the whispering and not so subtle glances in my direction, I could tell that they were talking about Ponyboy again.

By the time I got home, I was exhausted and would have liked nothing more than to just curl up in bed and go to sleep, but, of course, that wasn't an option. I had work this afternoon, just like I did most afternoons nowadays, so I dragged myself off to the couch and tugged on my waitress uniform, smoothing out the wrinkles.

I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror brushing my hair back into a ponytail when I heard the front door open. Securing the tie around my hair, I stepped out of the bathroom expecting to see Two-Bit waiting to give me a ride.

Instead I found myself face to face with Steve.

"Oh," I said in surprise. "Hi."

"Hi," Steve said, shifting uncomfortably. "Uh, Two-Bit's takin' Kathy to the movies, so he asked me to swing by and give ya a lift over to the diner on my way down to the DX station."

"Okay," I replied, avoiding his gaze as easily as he avoided mine. "Um, yeah, just let me get my coat then."

"Right."

I disappeared into my room, grabbing my coat off of my bed, and turned to the mirror, taking a moment to smooth my hair, just in case, before joining Steve out in the living room. He was leaning against the door, gaze to the floor and fidgeting in the way he did when he was nervous.

"All set," I reported, and he nodded, opening the door. He held it open for a moment, as if he was waiting for me to go through, then seemed to realize what he was doing and hurried outside with a scowl on his face.

I shook my head, sighing as I followed.

The drive to the diner was quiet and tense, though not as intense as the drive back to school after the stolen kiss we'd shared. I kept my gaze trained out the window and let my thoughts drift to Ponyboy. I missed him, you know? Not just because he was my little brother, but because he was real good at figuring things out, and I figured that the mess between me and Steve was in major need of figuring out.

If I'd been paying attention, I would have noticed that Steve kept looking at me out of the corner of his eye, and that his fingers were clenching the steering wheel a little tighter than usual.

But I wasn't paying attention, and so when we pulled into the diner parking lot and I reached for the door handle only to find it locked, I was startled. "Ya wanna let me out?" I asked.

"Yeah, in a minute," Steve said distractedly, his brow furrowed as if he was trying to figure something out.

"Look," I said impatiently. "I gotta get to work, so unless there's somethin' that ya wanna say to-"

My protest was cut short by a kiss that took me completely by surprise, and yet somehow I should have known it was coming. For a long moment I lost myself in his kiss, in the soft lips pressed against mine, in the soaring sensation that washed over me, and then reality set in.

Steven Randle was kissing me.

Again.

Dammit, I thought with a groan, and pressed my palms against his chest, pushing him off of me. "Steve, stop," I ordered. "We can't do this."

"You're right," Steve replied, his gaze lowering to avoid mine. "Lord, I don't know what I was thinkin'... you're just a kid."

"I ain't a kid, ya jerk," I snapped, my eyes blazing. "That's not what I'm talkin' about. You're with Evie! Or did ya forget about her?"

"No," Steve sighed, blowing out a long hiss of air. "No, I didn't forget about her. I just... I wasn't thinkin'. I couldn't help it. I just wanted to kiss ya and..."

"And so ya did," I finished quietly.

"Yeah," he agreed. "And so I did."

I'm not normally a real quiet person, in fact, Darry used to joke around that I talked more than a politician, but he hasn't said that in a long time. After Mom and Dad died, and Ponyboy started to talk less, I reckon that the more I talked, the less silence there was to haunt us all, you know?

And I'm definitely not the kind of girl who has trouble with words, I always know what needs to be said when no one else does, but right then I had no idea what could be said, much less what needed to be.

"What does all this mean then?" I asked softly, not looking up from studying my apron. "I mean, ya can't just keep kissin' me whenever ya feel like it, Steve. So what are we goin' to do about all this?"

"I dunno," Steve replied with a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his dark curls. "Lord, I dunno what's happenin' here. I'm seein' Evie. She's wearin' my damn ring!"

"Steven?" I said softly. "Why did ya kiss me?"

There was an uneasy pause and for a minute I thought he wasn't going to answer, but he did. "I dunno," he admited quietly. "I reckon it's just that I can't seem to stop noticin' things about you lately, and when you're around that's all I can think about."

"What things?" I asked curiously, raising an eyebrow.

"You're beautiful, you know that?" he demanded. "Glory, I mean, you were always a cute kid, but all of the sudden it's like you're not a little girl anymore, and you're not just cute now, you're a real doll. It's confusin' as hell, I mean, you're Sodapop's kid sister, but..."

"But?" I prompted, biting my lip.

"But I can't seem to get ya out of my head," he confessed with a groan.

Despite myself, a part of me felt giddy at that announcement, and a faint smile touched the corners of my mouth before I smothered it out. "I see," I said quietly. "Well, the way I see it, you've got two options here, Steve."

"Oh?"

"We can either pretend none of this ever happened and go back to the way things were," I said, ignoring the snort he gave at that idea. "Or you can figure out what it is ya want and we can see where things go from there."

I reached over him and unlocked my door, then lifted the handle and started to slide out of the car, but stopped when I felt his hand touch my elbow.

"What is it that you want, then?" he inquired curiously.

"I want my life to make sense again," I informed him as I stepped out onto the gravel parking lot. "Thanks for the ride, I'll see you later."

I shut the car door and walked to the diner, glancing back as I pushed open the door.

Steve was watching me, a thoughtful look on his face, and then he put the car in reverse and pulled out of the parking lot.

Shaking my head, I slipped inside and headed into the back to clock myself in.

It was going to be another one of those days.