Greatest apologies for the lateness! Long story really. But I finally had this written down and I think I went a bit off track with the whole horror thingie. I tried, really, but after re-reading this, I think I may have ruined it. Dear me, so much for trying horror. Che!

Thank you to muse and beta-reader (Kagaya and V-chan)

Happy new year everyone!

JU-ON 11

Everything seemed to have stopped for a long time around Kakashi as he sat there on the bed, staring down at Iruka with wide eyes. It was like slowly pushing a kunai down on your finger. The pain would be nothing initially but as the force was increased, the pain gradually spreads, sending shivers down the spinal column and finally you submit to the urge to scream. If Kakashi was a lesser man, he would have yelled, demanded an explanation with the boiling temper that was rising in him at the moment, and maybe, just maybe he would have shook him hard. Words were stuck in his throat, and Iruka, obviously seeing the distress the Jounin was going through, turned his head away, slowly forcing himself to sit up until his back was facing Kakashi, the large scar that was pale and white before now bright and red.

"You're dying." Kakashi parroted, feeling strangely numb. Iruka nodded once in affirmative to his statement. "I don't understand."

Iruka wanted badly to close his eyes but sheer will power kept them open. "Neither do I."

"Then how can you be dying?" Kakashi asked voice dangerously low. Iruka knew that voice, and that tone. It basically means that Kakashi was in no mood to be messed around with. It also means that he might get violent and is on the angry-level on his emotion scale. "How can you be dying?" Iruka knew he had to answer before Kakashi grabbed him or shook him like he always did when he wanted answers.

"I don't know." Iruka whispered, wincing a bit as his sides hurt, a hand coming to stop right on top of the painful core and rubbing in hopes of soothing the pain. Iruka felt Kakashi shift on the bed and stand up. It was typical of Kakashi to leave him in such a state and Iruka knew it was because Kakashi didn't want anymore in their relationship other than just plain body-warmth. In fact, Iruka waited for the bedroom door to slam close, signaling Kakashi's departure. What he did not expect was for Kakashi to come and kneel in front of him, his hands softly coming to rest on his thighs, mismatched eyes looking up at him. Iruka had briefly wondered earlier if the small sign that he saw in Kakashi's eyes might have been a mistake, that there was no love and that his fatigue and illness was finally giving him illusions. But looking down at Kakashi, who was giving him a lost look, almost desperate, Iruka somehow felt assured that perhaps Kakashi did think more of him other than just a bed mate.

I'm dying.

"How?" Kakashi whispered, gently pressing his hand on Iruka's side, rubbing it. The wince Iruka gave in response to the touch somehow made Kakashi look all the more desperate for an explanation. "How? You teach, you do paper work, you don't go on missions. How can you be dying? I don't understand." Iruka stared at the sheets between his legs, no longer able to look at Kakashi's vulnerable expression. It was the first time to see the Jounin in such a state. A warm hand came to rest on Iruka's face, making the Chuunin look up to find Kakashi's face hovering in front of his, hand trembling slightly as it traced Iruka's temple, eyebrows, cheek bones and came to rest on his lips. "How? Tell me."

I'm dying.

"I don't know." Iruka shook his head. "It's something inside me, like some sort of disease. Like acid melting my insides."

"Hokage." Kakashi said, voice low. "She can heal you."

"She can't." Iruka felt an ironic smile come to his dried and pale lips. He shook his head for more emphasis. "She can't."

"How can she not?" Kakashi hissed, eyes narrowing. "She is supposed to be a fucking genius in the medical field."

The desperation in Kakashi's voice was so visible that Iruka winced a bit. He slowly reached up with his hand to pull Kakashi's away from his lips and continued to look down at his thighs. "This is something even she can't heal."

Kakashi brought his hands under Iruka's chin and gently tilted his head up, so that mismatched eyes stared deeply in to tired brown ones. "Why?"

Iruka shook his head slightly. "I don't know."

"Why don't you know? It's your illness! It's your health! You should know! Tell me why you're dying! Tell me how to –" Kakashi cupped Iruka's face in between his hands. "Tell me how to help you."

Iruka swallowed, tears pooling at the corner of his eyes and trickling down slowly, falling on to the tips of Kakashi's fingers. "You can't." Iruka pulled away from Kakashi, burying his face in his hands. "I'm so tired."

"Is that why you look so different? Is it your sickness that did this to you?" Kakashi asked, a frantic edge ringing in his questions.

Iruka knew what Kakashi was really asking. It was more 'Did I do this to you' instead of what he voiced out. "Yes." Iruka nodded. "It's better this way. I haven't slept in god knows how many days and I can't keep my eyes open."

"Then why don't you go to sleep?" Kakashi asked exasperatedly. "Why torture yourself?"

The question suddenly hit Iruka. Indeed, why torture himself when he can easily put an end to this madness? Why stay awake for long nights and be afraid of going to sleep because of what he might see?

"Funny." Iruka mumbled, staring at his hands. "I never thought of that."

"Of what?" Kakashi looked at his face. "Thought of what?"

I'm dying.

"There is a curse." Iruka said, explaining his understanding of the whole twisted ordeal. "I am cursed. It works two ways." Kakashi cocked his eyebrow. "I had a deeply buried grudge towards Kyuubi for taking my parents away, and the same goes for those who died." This time, Kakashi frowned. "I – I think that something out there, some kind of force, is using me as the grudge bearer. Am I making sense?"

Kakashi shifted his weight and nodded. "A bit."

"I don't understand it myself." Iruka said, staring at his hands. "I carry the grudge of everyone, and the only way to free myself of it, is to kill –" Iruka couldn't continue, so he looked away.

"Naruto."

"Yes." Iruka nodded. "I – I think if I do succeed in eliminating the source of the grudge, I will get better." He looked up sadly at Naruto. "Naruto deserves better."

Kakashi was the one who looked away this time. "You'd die for him."

"No one else would." Iruka sighed tiredly and coughed, bringing his hands to mouth. "I want him to live and achieve what he aims for. This is the least I could do." Kakashi opened his mouth to speak, but Iruka's next words stopped him. "I see faces. Dead people's faces. I don't recognize them, but I feel like I know them." Iruka brought his hands to his face, shoulders trembling. "They are angry at me. I want so badly to sleep, to close my eyes for a few minutes, but I'm afraid. Afraid of what I might see."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Kakashi asked softly.

I'm dying.

"I –" Iruka trembled, feeling cold. "I'm sorry."

Kakashi grabbed him by the shoulders and shook his hard. "Sorry? What's sorry going to do now? You're dying! Does that mean anything to you? Is it clicking in there? Answer me!"

"I cannot kill him! I won't! I refuse too! Me dying is a small price to pay for all the things he's been through! The last thing he needs is a couple of dead people wanting him dead! Bad enough the entire village hates him!" Iruka snapped back as bitterly as he can. "I don't care! I have nothing to loose. He will live, become a great Hokage and that is what matters."

"You." Kakashi swallowed, licking his lips. "What about you? Do you – "

Iruka looked at Kakashi tiredly, weakly, like he's about to collapse. "Would it matter now? For me to say that I love you?" Kakashi dropped his head, hands still gripping Iruka by the shoulders. Iruka smiled slightly. "Because no matter what you think, even this illness cannot make this particular feeling go. Don't feel bad. It's not your fault. It's just me."

"How can you say that?" Kakashi asked, the grip laxing on Iruka's shoulders, pale hands coming up to rest on Iruka's face. "What makes you think I feel bad that you love me?"

Iruka smiled. "Do you?"

Kakashi looked at him for a while. "No."

"Then I am wrong." Iruka smiled then rubbed at the painful spot on his chest. Kakashi placed one of his hands on top of Iruka's, gently rubbing at his chest. "Don't give me pity Kakashi. Just give me a bit of respect. That's all I ask for."

"You have my respect." Kakashi replied, gently pushing Iruka down on the bed and pulling the blanket over him. "You always have."

"I'm sorry." Iruka said.

"Iruka I –"

"I need to ask you something, Kakashi." Iruka said, temporarily silencing Kakashi. "Please be honest." Kakashi gave him a promising nod. "Am I a weak person?"

Kakashi didn't have to hesitate. "No." He gently kissed Iruka's temple. "You're not, believe me, you're not."

Iruka felt a wash of relief hearing it coming from Kakashi's lips. "That's nice."

I'm dying.

"How are you feeling?" Kakashi asked, after a long moment of silence.

"Like I'm burning from the inside." Iruka answered, not missing the slight flinch Kakashi's face made.

"You're in pain." Kakashi's brows knitted together.

"Yes." Iruka nodded. "It hurts."

Kakashi placed a hand on Iruka's chest, gently rubbing circles, trailing down to his waist and coming to rest on his hip. "You're still beautiful." Even when he's feeling like a bonfire was burning inside him, Iruka still blushed. Kakashi came down to press his lips on the corner of Iruka's lips and left butterfly kisses all over his jaw, neck and chest, before resting his head on Iruka's chest, listening to the tired and weak heartbeat. "Lying like this, I know you're still alive."

Iruka brought a hand up and gently ran it through Kakashi's hair. "I'm still breathing." Iruka chuckled.

"Yes." Kakashi closed his eyes. "That's what matters now. I want to wake up tomorrow and find you still breathing."

Iruka closed his eyes, this time, he didn't feel very afraid. He dared himself to sleep. "I can't make promises." Kakashi placed a hand right over Iruka's heart. "I will try."

"That's good enough." Kakashi whispered.

Iruka smiled and let out a shaky breath. "Good night."

I'm dying.

Kakashi closed his eyes. "Good night."

XXX

Kakashi waited till Iruka's breathing pattern returned to a calm and stable state before standing up slowly and pulling on his clothes quickly. Not wasting another precious minute, he made a wild rush towards the hospital where he knew that Tsunade was doing her nightly rounds. He didn't have to look very far because he found her exiting one of the intensive care wards.

"Hokage-sama." He greeted, dipping his head in respect.

"Oh. Kakashi." Tsunade raised an eyebrow.

"Can we talk? Now." Kakashi said voice tight and edgy. He didn't give to shits if he was talking to the Hokage or not, because right now, he just saw her as a medic specialist.

Tsunade couldn't avoid twitching at the order-sounding phrase but decided to humor the copy-nin and see what he really wants. "This way." Tsunade led him to a small office, which she used temporarily when she was doing her rounds in the hospital. Closing the door behind her, she sat behind her table and crossed her arms across her chest. "What is it?"

"Iruka is ill." Kakashi said flatly. "I want you take care of him."

"Where is he?" Tsunade remembered the state and damaged tissues Iruka had in his body and was biting down the urge to punch Kakashi's face in. It all made sense. Why else would Kakashi come barging to her in the middle of the night? That and Iruka was declared missing in the hospital just roughly about an hour ago.

"At home. Asleep." Kakashi narrowed his visible eye. "Take care of him."

Tsunade really wanted to beat the crap out of the copy-nin. "Now that's something coming from you." She said tightly. "Do you even know that Iruka has been suffering from stress of were you just too busy getting what you want to even notice?" Kakashi tensed at her words. "I know what's going on. His body told me everything even when he said nothing and hid it. Though why Iruka would even bother covering up for a fool like you is beyond me." Kakashi couldn't find words to reply to her. "I can't help him and he knows that."

"Why?" Kakashi demanded. "You're a genius! You should be able to!"

"I can't!" Tsunade hissed. "I can't, okay? I don't even know what is going on. I've run blood tests and x-rays and all kinds of scans. There is something in his blood that is causing excessive heat to gather around his organs, damaging the cell because of the increase of temperature. I can't pinpoint the origin, and believe me, I'm still trying to figure it out. I'm getting nowhere."

"So that's it? He's just going to die? Is there no medicine or some sort of jutsu you can use on him? Anything?" Kakashi was now almost begging.

Tsunade looked away. "I'm sorry. I'm trying. I really am."

"It's not good enough!" Kakashi snapped. "He's dying! There has to be a way!"

"Maybe if you had been a wee bit considerate on his condition, maybe it would have helped things, don't you think?" Tsunade fired back. "How do you think I feel about this whole situation? I feel useless! A failure! You're not the only one feeling bad!"

Kakashi brought hands to his face. "There is nothing at all?"

"Nothing that I know of." Tsunade said quietly. "Be gentle with him." Kakashi looked at her. "I'll know when I see him next."

"Of course I will! What do you think of me?" Kakashi glared fiercely.

"Like I said, his body state told me tales." Tsunade stood up. "Be gentle. And that's a warning."

Tsunade left the office, with Kakashi leaning against the window sill, a hand covering half his face, guilt and sorrow surrounding his heart. Kakashi knew Tsunade walking away isn't because she didn't care. If he were in here place, he would have walked away too. Was it really that hopeless? Kakashi turned to look out the window, a nagging feeling urging him to hurry back to Iruka's apartment.

"Iruka." He tilted his head up towards the night sky. "You don't deserve this."

XXX

Iruka turned in his sleep, brows furrowing. He could feel hands on his shoulder, lightly tracing the bare curve of his elbow then slowly sliding down to caress his bare back. A low whine escaped Iruka throat as he shifted a bit to avoid the soft touches. For a while it didn't bother him, until a firm grip grabbed him from his shoulder, pinning him sharply on the bed, long nails digging in to his flesh. Iruka let out a pained cry, opening his eyes to find his red-eyed mirror image staring down at him, an ugly and angry sneer on his lips.

"You think this is over? You think you can just walk away, sleep like nothing is wrong and not have to deal with me?" He sneered, fingers wrapping around Iruka's neck, slowly applying pressure.

"You can't kill me." Iruka said, grabbing the wrists of the hands on his neck. "Because if I die, the so do you!"

"Oho? Really?"

Iruka couldn't take it anymore. He didn't want to turn and close his eyes only to find this monstrous entity looming above his face. He summoned whatever strength he had left and glared up at his mirror-image. "Yes! Really!" With all his knowledge of his ninja training, he grabbed the man above him and threw him off the bed. Without even thinking, Iruka got up from the bed and made a dash for the door but the sheets tangled around his ankles. Iruka let out a loud horrible curse and started to get rid of the sheets around his ankles just as his red-eyed mirror image got up from the floor on the other side of the bed and was about to grab him. Iruka freed his legs and sent his left heel up the Red-eyes' chest then once more around his chin.

"Damnit!" Red eyes cried. "Damn you, you shit!"

Iruka scrambled to his feet and made a mad race for the door, shutting it behind him. He held the doorknob, and was quickly thinking of a jutsu to keep the door close when the door was wrenched open. Real or not, Red eyes still seem to have more strength than Iruka did and the fact that Iruka hasn't been getting enough rest and that his insides were already grilled, it was no surprise that Iruka would loose. But that did not mean Iruka no longer had a presence of mind. Before Red eyes could even do anything, Iruka slammed the palm of his hand towards the nose in front of him before high tailing out of the hall.

He didn't get far because hands clawed at his back, pushing him face down on the wooden floors, his nose smashing and bleeding in the process. Iruka let out a painful cry and began to struggle.

"Get off me!" Iruka bit out, trying to free his arms from the twisted grip

"Like I'd let go of you, you twisted shit!" Red eyes hissed, twisting Iruka's arms more to the point that any more pressure would snap the bones.

"Off me!" Iruka yelled, releasing a blast of chakra and startling Red eyes enough for him to knock him off his back with a twisted leg grab and kicking him on the knees once, Iruka managed to scramble back a few feet.

"You'll pay for that!" Red eyes yelled.

Iruka ran for the kitchen, knocking things on his way – lamp stand, small table, plant pot – to block Red eyes if just for a few seconds. Iruka threw kitchen drawers open, looking for one thing. Just one thing. He would have gone for his kunai or shuriken but those were in closet in the bedroom and he was not going back in to the bedroom.

"I'm going to rip your throat out, you little fucker!" Red eyes screeched and grabbed Iruka by the hair, just as Iruka managed to circle his hand on the handle of a kitchen knife and quickly made a large cut on his palm. Red eyes gave out a loud ear shattering scream, letting go of his Iruka's hair and staggering back. "What the – what are you doing?"

Iruka was biting down his lips from the pain he was feeling from the cut on his hand. He leaned against one side of the kitchen wall, breathing fast. "You said that you're me and that I'm you." Red eyes looked at him with semi-dawned understanding. "So, if I do this –" Iruka made a deep cut running from his wrist all the way to his elbows, a whimper escaping his lips that he's trying to keep close out of sheer will power. Red eyes was already screeching in pain and letting out a string of curses. "You get hurt as well."

"Fool!" Red eyes howled. "You pay with your own life!"

Iruka stared at the knife in his hand and the blood dripping on the clean kitchen floor, forming a large pool. He was starting to feel dizzy from the blood loss and for a moment, he didn't really care. Iruka looked up to find Red Eyes along with other several angry faces – pale, misty with their mouth opens in a begging 'no' – staring back at him. "I pay it gladly." Iruka raised the knife and pointed the tip to his chest, right beside his heart.

"No! Don't!"

Iruka closed his eyes and everything before him flashed – his days as a genin, his classes, his students practicing, his colleagues, his parents, Naruto and finally, Kakashi – and he drove the tip of the blade deep in to is chest, the pain causing him to gasp and let out a painful grunt and whimper, as he sank to his knees and fell on his side. There was a loud yell and a deep sad howls of the dead before everything just faded in to silence.

"It's over." Iruka mumbled, the knife still in his chest, the colors around him slowly fading. The kitchen floor was getting too cold for him. With whatever strength he had left, Iruka pulled the knife out, tears leaking from the corners of his eyes and slowly pulled his way towards the kitchen door. His head spun too fast and everything was tilting to one side. There was a sort of pull at his insides and a sense of calmness he hasn't felt in a long time. Iruka welcomed it, not managing to get any farther from the door of the kitchen. His bloody hand that was gripping the kitchen doorframe turned lax and slowly slid down to the floor, as Iruka stared at the night sky through the window of his living room, the pool of red thickening around him. "It's over." He blinked tiredly, slowly, like it was too much effort. "Naruto." Iruka swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling the warm blood touch his cheeks. "Kakashi." He closed his eyes, no longer afraid of what might hurt him, because he was dying already. They won't come for him anymore. His mind wouldn't be able to handle it because it was already shutting down. "I'm sorry."

I'm …

Dying …

I'm …

Sorry …

TBC

Where the f""" is Kakashi when you need him? Oo