Wow, over one hundred reviews! I never thought that I'd ever write something this popular. Thanks so much. Also there's a small quote from the Bible. I'm not trying to make them religious, it just seemed to fit. So now on with the story.
Remus' POV
I awake to the sight of a sleeping Sirius very close to my face. The morning sunlight streams through the thin curtains and highlights his ebony hair. It is long past sunrise but I'm far past the point of caring. He stirs in his sleep and I find myself being pulled closer to him.
I blush slightly as I think back to last night. I really made an arse out of myself. I try so hard to not let my emotions show, but sometimes they get away from me.
The full impact of the previous nights' events hit me as Sirius awakes. I wonder if we did the right thing by covering it up. I doubt that we'll be caught; wizards hardly ever investigate too closely when a Muggle weapon was involved. Besides, why would my mother or I want the "loving and caring" father and "devoted and loving" husband dead?
"Knut for your thoughts," says the sleepy voice of Sirius in my ear.
I kiss him on the nose and say, "save the knut for a rainy day."
"Sometimes you're too stubborn for your own good," he replies before kissing me full on the mouth.
"Really guys," says James as he walks into the room, "Keep it to the minimum would you? There's no need for you to traumatize my mum." "Or Remus'," he adds as an afterthought.
We pull apart quickly. "It's probably best if my mother doesn't find out," I say quietly to Sirius, "I think that something like this would push her over the edge."
"You're probably right," he says as he reluctantly releases me from the prison of his arms. I give him a grateful smile and one last peck on the lips before getting up.
"Is there a shower I can use?" I ask James. He points me in the right direction and I head off to mull things over with a bit of hot water.
~*~*~*
A long shower and a towel with a heating charm placed on it courtesy of Sirius later I'm feeling ready to face the world. We head to the kitchen where Mrs. Potter has left us breakfast. I pick half heartedly at the toast, eggs, and bacon until I'm threatened to be force feed. Honestly I'm not a child; I can take care of myself. But Sirius doesn't see things like that. In fact, if one of us needs looking after it's him not me. Oh well, I might as well humor him.
My mother enters the room and in the morning sunlight I can fully see the dark shadows under her eyes and the paleness of her skin. It must have been a hard night for her for she obviously hasn't gotten much sleep. "Remus dear can I have a word?" she asks hoarsely.
"Sure mum," I reply as I rise from my seat; happy to leave the despised food behind.
We exit the warm and spacious kitchen and enter the living room. "The Ministry flooed this morning," she starts quietly, "they've offered to set up a funeral."
"When will it be," I ask.
"In three days," is the reply. It's so soon; how will we ever be ready?
I hate funerals; always have, always will. I hate the way people stare at the deceased person's family with that look of pity. Everyone wears black and cries and the whole affair is just downright uncomfortable. When I die I want people to wear white and celebrate the life I lived not morn the end of it. I mean all good things must come to an end right? Death is just the next step of the journey.
She's talking again, "we'll have to find some decent things to wear and we'll have to invite people. Eleanora has offered to help with the reception afterwards. We're allowed to go home after that." I can tell that she's nervous. Her hands are shaking and there is a slight tremor in her voice.
"It'll be fine mum," I say quietly.
She smiles at me and says, "You can invite some friends if you'd like besides James and Sirius."
"Thanks," I say, "I think that I'll do that right now." There is a heavy silence before I say, "you all right?"
"I think I will be," she says. It will take a bit of time, but I believe her. We hug tightly and I feel warm and loved. At least one of my parents still loves me regardless of who I am; I could be like Sirius and have my whole family hate me. We draw apart and I go off the floo Lily, Peter, and Jen.
~*~*~*~*~
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I fear no evil" Of course he wouldn't fear evil for he was evil himself. Maybe not entirely so, I still believe in the fact that he had a bit of good in him but the alcohol turned him sour and uncaring. The thought of what was lost to the vile drink almost makes me want to cry but the thought of crying in front of all these distant relatives and so called friends immediately shuts the dam.
The funeral is happening now; after three hellish days of preparation were finally here. I'm sitting in my black suit in-between Lily and Sirius. Both have taken hold of one of my hands and every so often Sirius will squeeze the one in his possession. My mother, James' parents, Peters' parents, Lilys' parents, and Jens' parents sit behind us.
It is a small and quiet affair and I'm loathing every moment that I must spend sitting here. All I want to do is fall into Sirius' arms but that can't happen here. If I was a female there would be no problem with my boyfriend comforting me, but I'm male and so it can't be (at least not in public.)
Now the one who is residing over the ceremony (I never did catch his title) is finished talking and the coffin is being lowered into the ground. Thankfully its lid was kept closed throughout the service so I was spared having to look at him. I suppose it's time to face the music, or rather the relatives. I figure that it's just my luck that my father came from a huge extended family.
"Stay with me," I whisper to Sirius as we are whisked out of the cemetery and to the portkey which will take us to the reception. I grip his hand tightly as we are immediately attacked by a pack of sympathetic relatives. I'm hugged and kissed and pinched and generally mauled by the hoard. I don't even know half of them but they all seem to know me.
When I'm finally able Sirius and I make a direct retreat to the table that the others have staked out. "If I hear the words 'we're so sorry for your loss' one more time I swear I'll kill whoever says them," I growl to my friends.
"But Remus we really are sorry for your loss," says Sirius. I glare at him and turn the other way. "Oh come on Moony, don't be like that. I was only trying to lighten the mood," he pleads.
How can I resist that? I turn back and give him a half smile, "its okay Sirius," I say softy, "I'm just a little on edge right now."
He pulls me into a tight hug and I don't even care that we're in public. Let them look; I've past the point of caring.
All too soon it's time for them to leave. The last of the relations have been pushed out the door and now it's time for them to go as well. I drag Sirius into a dark corner and we have a good and proper snog before he has to leave.
Back at the front door I hug them all in turn and say my goodbyes. When the front finally shuts after them for the last time (Sirius came back twice for another hug) mum and I turn to face the empty house.
"We'll clean up tomorrow," she says, "for now let's just get some sleep." I smile at her and I can't help but think that these next few weeks before school starts again will be very interesting.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sirius' POV
It's September the first. I've been getting letters regularly but I can't wait to see my Remus again. I wanted to visit but Mrs. Potter told me that it would probably be best if I didn't. Apparently Remus and his mother have been doing a bit of bonding and the wounds are starting to heal. Remus said that the guns and all the beer in the house were disposed of so they seem to be on the right path.
There he is. I watch as he hugs and kisses his mother and starts walking in my direction. It never ceases to amaze me that he can take my breath away by just walking towards me. I make sure that my body is well hidden as he comes closer and at the last second I reach out and pull him to me.
"Hello to you too," he says as he snuggles his head into the crook of my neck.
"Honestly," says James as he walks up with Lily on his arm, "I leave you two alone for two seconds and look at what I come back to!" Remus laughs his musical, lilting laugh and I'm lost.
Our next encounter is not such a pretty one. "Well if it isn't our resident queers?" sneers the greasiest git of them all (otherwise know as Snape).
"At least I have someone to love me as does Sirius," says Remus from the circle of my arms, "that's more than you can say." There is a pregnant pause before Remus says, "come on Padfoot lets go find the others and get a seat." With that I find myself being dragged by the hand into the Hogwarts express.
"Bit feisty today are we?" I ask. He just grins and keeps walking. It's wonderful to see him back to his old self again. We find Peter and Jen snogging in a car and join them (that is we join in the sitting not the snogging.)
James and Lily soon join us bursting with news. I, of course, have not heard much of anything else since the bloody letter came but the others don't know. "You'll never guess who the Head Girl and Boy are," says James.
"Do tell," I say with just a bit of sarcasm.
"Lily and I," he nearly shouts, "imagine me of all people the Head Boy!"
"That's great James," says Remus, "congratulations to both of you." He smiles but I can see a bit of disappointment. I know that Remus really wanted to be Head Boy. I take his hand and squeeze gently. I'm rewarded with one of his dazzling smiles that I love so much. James in his delirious state of happiness doesn't notice.
We are enjoying the ride very much until a girl from Hufflepuff comes into the car. "Remus how are you?" she asks with a look of pity on her face.
"I'm fine," he says with a bit of confusion.
"I heard what happened this summer and I just wanted to let you know that I'm here for you." Then she gives him a big hug and walks out of the car.
"Well that was strange," says Peter a bit too loudly, trying to cover the uncomfortable silence. We resume our conversation but the happy atmosphere of before is gone. Remus hates pity in all way, shape and form and it shows.
This happens twice more before we arrive at Hogwarts and once on the way to the horseless carriages. Well at least I thought that they were horseless. "Remus do you see those horses?" I ask as we pile into one of the carriages.
"Yeah," he says, "I wonder when they came." Lily and James are looking at us funnily.
"What horses?" says James.
"You mean that you can't see them?" asks Remus in confusion.
Just then something clicks in Lilys' brain. "They must have been thestrals," she says, "only people who have seen someone die can see them. I read about it in second year when I first saw these carriages being pulled by nothing." Immediately Remus closes up.
~*~*~*~*~
It's been two weeks since we returned to Hogwarts. There's still hatred from many people towards us but I think that most people have either accepted it or are just ignoring us; the second one being the more common. The other thing that we've had to contend with is the pity for Remus. It seems that the Daily Prophet ran a story on the death and everyone knows about it.
He's been so tense and irritable lately. He snaps at the littlest of things which is not like him at all. That is why I've decided that something must be done.
"Come with me," I say to my uptight werewolf who is sitting in a chair reading a large book. He doesn't even look up. I try again by taking the book and giving him the puppy dog face.
"Oh fine," he snaps, "but make it quick I've got studying to do. We've got our N.E.W.T.s to study for." I smile and pull him up the stairs to our vacant dorms.
"Change into comfortable clothes and leave the shirt off," I say calmly. He gives me a funny look, but does it anyway, his curiosity getting the best of him. "Now lay face down on the bed," say as I kick off my shoes. When the action has been completed I sit next to him on the bed.
Gently I start to work the muscles in his neck, shoulders, and back. Slowly working my way across the relatively unmarred skin; I suppose that the wolf cannot reach his back too well. While I kneed the tense skin I speak, "You've really got to relax," I start, "just ignore them. They're ignorant and don't know any better. Just grin and bear it. Eventually they'll forget about it; something else will happen and the attention will be directed towards someone else." He nods and I lapse into silence.
A while later I'm still kneading and rubbing; but it seems like my efforts are paying off; the muscles are loosening. "Are you feeling better now?" I ask quietly. I get no response so I shift to see his face only to find that he's gone to sleep. I laugh quietly to myself before curling up next to him and pull him close to me. It's not long after that that I also enter the land of dreams.
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