Thanks to reviewers. I'm sorry about the sporadic updates; I've been away a lot. They should be back to semi-normal in September. Yes, I said September, meaning that this fic is far from over. On a side note, my stars and squiggles indicating chapter breaks have disappeared. Oh well, Enjoy!
Remus' POV
I'm scared and excited at the same time. The train is moving faster and faster towards my new life and I'm eager for it to begin. Our N.E.W.T.s results won't come until sometime in July, so for now we'll just settle into our flat.
I thought that it was a bit risky renting a flat without even seeing it first, but the agent sent us pictures and the others insisted. So, instead of going home we'll be heading there instead. James figured that we should probably do our decorating before we moved all our stuff in and we all agreed. Lily and Jen found a flat just down the road, so we'll be seeing a lot of them.
The train pulls into the station and we disembark. Lily and Jen are crying, but they've got big smiles on their faces. I swear that I'll never understand girls. From the look on James' face he doesn't look like he understands any better than I do. He puts an arm around his girlfriend and leads her off the platform. Peter does the same.
I look at Sirius questioningly but he just shrugs his shoulders and kisses my nose. I laugh and we follow our friends out into the sunny station.
We catch a taxi (and a few odd stares) to our new flat. "Home sweet home," says Sirius as he unlocks the door and leads the way into our new abode.
It's not much, but it's ours as long as we pay the rent. There are two bedrooms, a small kitchen, a bathroom, and a living area. James and Sirius immediately charge off down the narrow hall to claim rooms. James, being the one who started running first, secures the larger room for himself and Peter.
"Oh well Moony," says Sirius in mock sorrow, "I guess that we'll just have to get one big bed, 'cause it doesn't look like two will fit." He winks at me and turns to the others. Wormtail has turned a delicate shade of green.
"Oh come on Peter," I say, "it's not like we didn't share a bed for a year and a half at Hogwarts."
"Yeah," says James, "but now you'll be alone, and I don't even want to think about what you would do alone."
"Nothing we haven't done in the dorm," smirks Sirius.
Now James has turned slightly green. "You mean you've…" he says.
"Yup," returns Sirius with an evil grin. I bury my face in my hands; sometimes Sirius just doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut.
"Well shall we take a walk around and find something to eat?" asks Peter in a vain attempt to change the subject. I agree, happy for an excuse to get out of this embarrassing conversation.
We head outside and when we reach the street Sirius goes for my hand. "We shouldn't," I say to him as I pull away. "This is a chance for us to go private again. Just think; no more dirty looks when we walk by, no more hate crimes against us. We can be normal again."
"I suppose you're right," he mutters, "although we've never been normal by any stretch of the imagination."
"Good thinking," says James; then, "how about Chinese takeout for dinner?" He points to a restaurant across the street and we head in.
It's an hour later and we've just finished off the last of the Chinese food. "I think that the first order of business is to change the color of this rug," says James. He does have a point there. The rug is a puke brown color, shag and residing in our living room. "I think that we should make it red and gold," James adds.
"We've been living with those colors for seven years," complains Sirius, "how about blue instead."
"I'd rather a shade of purple," I interject.
"How about green," says Peter timidly.
"That's a Slytherin color Wormtail," says James in an outraged voice.
"I was thinking more of a light green," says Peter, "Slytherin is more of an emerald green." The argument rages on for a while before we decide that we're never going to agree.
"What if we divided the room up into sections?" suggests Peter. It's agreed upon, and the result is a very interesting looking rug. It is so interesting that it is the first thing Lily comments on when she comes through the door.
Jen and Lily stay until ten. While they're here they help us draw up a chore schedule and division of the rent. After James and Peter have kissed their girlfriends goodnight, we all settle down on our multi-colored rug for the night. Tomorrow will be a big day. I'm going home and I'm taking Sirius. I've got to tell Mum sometime and I figure that I might as well get it out of the way. I snuggle up to Sirius and hope that she'll take it well.
Lucy Lupins' POV
My son will be here soon. He didn't come home right away because he's renting a flat in London with his friends. I'm so proud of Remus. He's put up with so much; from my husband's abuse to being a werewolf. He's made it though. He's graduated from the best wizarding school in the country and has friends who accept him for who he is.
There's a knock at the door; he's here. "Mum," he calls from the kitchen, "I'm home."e
He walks in from the kitchen and I get a good look at him before he sits down. He's a bit taller and he looks a spot healthier than when I saw him last. He's still too thin though.
He sits down on the couch opposite from where I'm sitting in my rocking chair which was a present from the Potters. "Mum," he says, "before we sit down and have a nice long chat there's something I need to tell you." He's twisting his hands nervously and not looking me directly in the eye; this must be big.
"I'm listening dear," I say gently.
"Well," he says slowly, "I'm engaged."
"That's wonderful," I say happily. Why was he so nervous about telling me this? It's wonderful news. "Does she know about your, um, condition?" I ask.
"Yes, my fiancé knows about it and is okay with it," he says a bit louder, although he still won't look me in the eye. "I brought my fiancé with me," he says quietly again.
Sirius Black walks through the door way. "Hello Sirius dear," I say pleasantly, "did you come along with Remus and his wife to be?"
"Wife?" Sirius asks blankly, "Is there something you're not telling me about Moony?"
"No Sirius there's nothing I can think of," replies Remus.
"But if there's no woman, than…oh," I say as realization hits me. A moment later I pass out.
"Mum, Mum, MUM," is what I awaken to. I'm on the floor and Remus is hovering over me. Further up is Sirius. "Please go fetch me a glass of water Padfoot," says Remus. My son helps me back into my chair and Sirius returns with the water.
"Why don't you go up to my room and start getting my things together Padfoot. You remember where it is," says Remus quietly, "I'll be up in a bit." Sirius looks as if he's going to protest, but a look from Remus sends him off and up the stairs.
"Well there it is," Remus says once Sirius' footsteps have faded away. "I'm gay."
"How do you know? Are you sure? This could just be a phase," I say desperately, "you don't want to settle down with someone and then realize that it was just hormones. Or is it because he accepts you? Remus, just because most people are against werewolves doesn't mean that everyone is. I'm sure you could find a nice girl who'll love you." I know that I'm babbling, but I don't want my only son to do this. He has a tough life already, why is he making it harder for himself?
"I've never been surer of anything in my entire life," he says quietly, "I love him mum. Shouldn't that be important to you, for me to find someone that I love?"
"Yes, but do you really love him," I ask, "you're only eighteen Remus, how can you make that kind of decision so early?"
"James and Lily are getting married and no one said anything about them," he retorts in a steadily rising voice.
"Remus he's a boy," I say desperately.
"WHY SHOULD THAT MATTER," he's shouting now, "I LOVE HIM AND THAT'S ALL THAT SHOULD MATTER! STOP BEING A HOMOPHOBE AND PLEASE ACCEPT THIS."
"I JUST WANT WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU," I scream back.
"THIS IS WHAT'S BEST FOR ME," he bellows, "I'VE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE! THIS PAST YEAR AND A HALF THAT I'VE BEEN WITH HIM HAS BEEN AMAZING! I FUCKING LOVE HIM, WHY CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?"
He swore at me! In the eighteen years that I've been a mother not once has he cursed at me! "YOU'D BE HAPPIER WITH A WOMAN REMUS. YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN, PEOPLE WILL SCORN YOU, HELL, IT WON'T EVEN BE LEGAL!"
"PEOPLE SCORN ME ALREADY!" he counters, "AT LEAST THIS WAY I'LL BE HAPPY! PLEASE, MOST OF THE WORLD IS AGAINST ME, I DON'T WANT MY OWN MOTHER AGAINST ME TOO!" With that he rushes off up the stairs.
I follow him slowly up the stairs. His door is slightly ajar when I reach it and I can hear Remus' voice inside, "I just wish that she would understand! We've been through so much only to come home and get more of it. I…I want her blessing so much Padfoot! I always thought that besides you she was the only one who really understood me, but I guess I was wrong."
"Don't talk like that Remus," says Sirius quietly, "she's just in shock. If she loves you half as much as you say she does than eventually she'll realize that you're happy and that you can no more help being gay than the sky can help being blue."
The way they interact amazes me. Remus has always been a reserved person. The only person who I've ever seen him open up to like that is myself and even that doesn't happen often. He hasn't cried in years, yet he's starting now. I can see that he's trying to stop it from the way he's swiping at his eyes. Sirius notices too. He puts his arms around my son and draws Remus close to him.
"I…I just w…want," Remus stutters.
"Shhh love," whispers Sirius, "it'll be alright." He tightens his arms around Remus who buries his head in Sirius' shoulder. They stand like that for a while, just holding each other and Sirius rubbing Remus' back.
Eventually they draw away a bit, but they're still locked in the other's embrace. "Better now?" Sirius asks. Remus nods. Their eyes meet and a second later they're kissing, no, they're snogging. Sirius' hands travel down Remus' back and when they come to rest on his arse and give a slight squeeze I let out a small gasp.
They immediately spring apart. Remus stays on his feet, but Sirius isn't so lucky. He lands in Remus' open trunk that is in the process of being packed. It surprises me slightly because I had forgotten that he's moving out in the chaos of his announcement. "Dinner's ready," I say feebly before fleeing the room. Truth be told dinner has been ready since before they got here.
Dinner is a tense affair. Sirius keeps sending me death glares over his stew and is holding Remus' hand very obviously on the table top. Remus' looks are worse; because they are full a pain. They do seem to be in love though. Maybe I should give them my blessing. They've been lovers for a long time and friends for much longer. Sirius would take care of him; I just don't want him to have a harder life than he already does.
"Why don't you boys head upstairs and pack a bit while I clean up," I say quietly when the meal is finally through, "when I'm done I'll call you and we can talk." They nod and head off up the stairs, Sirius' arm around Remus' waist and Remus' arm around the other's shoulders. I like washing dishes; it has a calming effect on me. So, by the time I've put the last glass in the cupboard, I'm ready to talk.
They stomp down the stairs and seat themselves on the sofa. I'm already sitting in my rocking chair. "Now before you start yelling at me," I start, "I'd like you to hear me out. While I'm not happy with this decision, I really don't think that there's anything I can do about it. I love you very much Remus and I don't want you to get hurt. It'll take some getting used to on my part, but I want you to be happy and fighting this will not help to achieve that. Since you appear to be in love, I suppose that the only thing I can do is to give you my blessing and to warn you that the path you're choosing will not be an easy one. I love you, both of you, and I sincerely hope that you're happy together and that you'll visit me often." I take a deep breath and wait for their reaction.
Remus gets up and moves in front of me. He kneels down so that we're eye to eye and says, "thank you mum, you have no idea how much that means to me." He then throws himself into my arms.
Sirius rises also, "thank you Mrs. Lupin," he says softly. There is nothing more that he needs to say and we both know it.
"It's okay Sirius," I say and as an afterthought, "and call me Lucy Sirius, there's no need to be formal." He grins broadly as does Remus.
"Why don't you go get The Hobbit?" I say to Remus, "you can read." He nods and takes off for the stairs. Before Remus went to school and on holidays we would read in the evenings while his father was at work. When he was still small I would read, but as he grew older the job somehow passed to him. We've read a wide variety of both Muggle and Wizarding literature, but his all time favorite has always been The Hobbit.
He returns with a huge smile on his face; I don't see that smile often. Sirius has settled himself lengthwise on the couch, and Remus sits down in-between his legs. With Sirius' hands resting on his stomach, Remus opens the book and starts reading aloud. It makes me feel like I did the right thing when I look at them together. Although it makes me slightly uncomfortable, the small smiles that grace both their faces make up for it.
An hour later Remus has fallen asleep and is curled up with his head resting on Sirius' shoulder. The book has fallen to the floor. "You really love him don't you?" I ask Sirius.
"Yeah I do," he answers as he strokes Remus' head, a goofy grin gracing his lips. They'll be alright.
"Go to bed Sirius," I say, "I suppose you don't need me to get the camp bed?"
"I'll sleep on it if you want me to," he says, "but no, I don't need or really want it."
"Goodnight Sirius," I say quietly as he rises and scoops Remus up into his arms. Remus puts his arms around Sirius' neck and snuggles closer.
"Goodnight Lucy," says Sirius just as quietly so as not to wake the boy in his arms. He then heads up the stairs in the direction of Remus' room. I sigh and make my way to my own room. It takes a long time for me to fall asleep.
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