Harry Potter and the Something, Something, Something!

Avie: SORRY! I'm going to respond to absolutely anyone who reviews now, as to make it fair. Moofwafwafwafwa. Thanks, and yesh, it is extremely random…but I suppose that's what makes it funny. I think we all enjoyed the 'AWKWARD SILENCE', haha. I do that when there's an awkward silence…but I don't scream it. If I screamed it, it would RUIN THE EFFECT. But the Hufflepuff was in a huge room full of people, so she HAD to scream it. And if she whispered it, what would be the point then? …Uh.

Naoko Tasaki: Hmm, feng shui. I know absolutely nothing about feng shui, but its an interesting idea. I might be able to cook something up, hehe. Pink and yellow sounds very festive as well, I'm SURE our dear Professor would agree, teehee. Thanks for reviewing!

A Cute But Pyscho Bunny: OH MY GOD. That review was so overwhelming. Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever drink that much root beer. Ever. Again. Fine, you can still do it! It gives me ideas, but now I have to be determined to not use all of them. YOU should write a story with all these ideas instead of reviewing my kinda lame ones, haha. Plus, Mione's already a Mary-Sue so that last idea won't work..Well, not COMPLETELY in personality YET, but in LOOKS yes, so far.

Kiki Cabou: Aww, there's only five. Wait. Six. Wait. Seven. Um…at least two will be killed off for angst later, but I WON'T SAY WHO! AND I WON'T SAY WHO THE TRAITOR IS, EITHER! Also, please don't curse in your reviews. Please.

Guess I actually have to add something ELSE to these stupid pages now.

A/N: DO NOT CURSE IN YOUR REVIEWS.

Disclaimer: I don't own anybody, besides my wonderfully crafted Mary-Sues and insane ideas, if they aren't Aly's or Cute But Pyscho's.

Summary: Parody. Parody. Parody. PARODY IF YOU COULDN'T TELL BY THE FIRST SIX CHAPTERS! IDIOTS. (Gosh!) Cough, Napoleon Dynamite.

Chapter Seven: Harry Is A Young Grasshopper?

In which classes finally start and a young boy turns into a man

"Harry is a young grasshopper?" Ron asked blankly, but was ignored.

"Hmm, which class should we go to first, sisters?" asked Misty.

"Potions!" said Kristy.

"Charms!" said Mandy.

"Defense Against The Dark Arts!" said Erica.

"Let's skip class!" said Aly.

So then Aly skipped class.

"Where's Aly?" asked Ron absent-mindedly, chewing on a peanut butter pancake as they headed off for Potions.

"Oh – she, uh, hurt her leg," lied Mandy, not wanting to make Ron think less of her because of her sister.

"She did?" asked Harry. Erica kicked him in the shins. "Ow," Harry said dully.

Then they finally got to Potions.

"Hello, children," Snape sneered, "You are approximately six seconds late. DETENTION!"

Kristy burst into tears and fell to her knees.

"How dare you!" Harry spouted, "We are not rule-breakers!"

"You are rule breakers in my eyes," Snape snarled, "NOW SIT DOWN!"

((An example of the oh-so-heroic heroic dialogue and villainous dialogue in book six fanfics.))

Everyone sat down.

"NOW," Snape said icily, "What do you call the stomach organs of a wonkycarcarlook?"

"A harharshimmydoo!" cried Mandy, not raising her hand.

"WRONG!" hissed Snape, although she was right.

"I am NOT wrong," hissed Mandy.

"She is right," Misty agreed.

"You're a jerk," put in Erica.

"DETENTION FOR THE WHOLE YEAR!" Snape screeched.

Then the Mary-Sues fried him with the laser beams in their eyes.

"He'll come around," Erica shrugged.

Then they all had another celery dip party in the classroom.

"Ooh, a party!" Professor Black exclaimed, randomly walking by and coming in.

Everyone gave him sticks of celery.

"Thank you!" he said gratefully, "You are all getting Os!"

"COOL, BRIBERY!" a random Slytherin yelled. Then he was thrown out of the room.

"Hunger," whined Harry and Ron, eyeing Sirius enviously.

Mandy handed Ron a celery stick.

Ron ate it so fast he choked.

"Noooo, my love!" Mandy shrieked.

Misty used her magical powers to make Ron stop choking.

Ron's eyes fluttered open.

And then THEY fell in love!

"Aww!" said Professor Black sweetly.

"Still hungry," Harry whined.

"Deal with it, pal!" said Sirius, slapping Harry on the back.

((AHH..Sirius..so..out..of..character..))

THE END of chapter seven