Chapter 21: The Arena
Tariel, Artalax, and Talia stood in front of the Heal-O-Aid Arena. It was the largest open-air gladiatorial arena they had ever seen, but the one thing that made it different than all the other arenas they had visited while in Altaria was the abundance of posters plastered all around the walls. All the posters showed the same image: a gladiator, clad in full battle armor, drinking a bottle of strange blue liquid. The bottles had the words "Heal-O-Aid" written on them.
"I wonder what those are?" remarked Tariel.
"It looks like the Heal-O-Aid is a healing potion," said Artalax. "That's what the liquid looks like. And it makes sense that gladiators would be drinking it since they get wounded in battle."
"I know that," said Tariel. "What I meant was, why do they have to put all these posters up? Normally, when I want a healing potion I just go to the apothecary and get one. I don't see what all the posters have to do with it."
"I guess that's just another mystery of Carpathia that we'll have to find out," said Artalax.
"Let's deliver this package," said Tariel. "There's a door over there that says 'Deliveries.' I think that's where we should go."
"Wait, I have a better idea," said Artalax. "Maybe we should take a look at what's in the package. It might be something we could use. Even if it's not that, it could give us a clue."
"You mean you're going to take what's in the package?" said Talia. "That's not very heroic, just stealing other people's stuff."
"Come on' it's not like they even look at what's in the package anyway, let alone use it," said Artalax. "I've done FedEx quests a lot, and they're always the same: the guy just takes it, gives you the reward, and the bag disappears. Don't know why they need it, but, hey, if it gives me money, then I'll do it."
Artalax opened up the package. There was a small, unusual-looking device there. It looked similar to the remote control they had seen Medica use back at the Temple, but it was bigger and had a wire coming off of it that could be used to plug into the MGPS device. On the back of it there was a sticker: "PTD (Deluxe Edition). Kalmeth Industries."
They took the device out of the package, and then re-sealed the package so it did not looks as if it had been tampered with. "Wow, this Kalmeth guy must be really rich," commented Tariel.
A few minutes later, inside the Arena…
Tariel approached the person behind the counter, carrying the package. "Hello. I've come to deliver this package," he said. "Are you the person who I'm supposed to deliver it to?"
"Yes," he said, and took the package. He stacked the package upon top of a pile of similar packages, not even bothering to look inside. He then gave Tariel fifteen gold pieces.
"Well, I guess Artalax was right," thought Tariel. "They really don't look inside the packages. Maybe we can do this next time too." But the man behind the counter had something else to tell him.
"You three look like strong fighters. Are you interested in trying to win the grand prize of 250,000 gold pieces?"
"What do I have to do?" said Tariel.
"Today is Open Challenge Day," he explained. "That means any team of three can challenge the current top-ranked gladiator team. If you win then you become the reigning champions, plus you get the 250,000 gold piece prize."
"That sounds good. I think we can handle it."
"Be warned, you'll be facing some tough competition here. The current top-ranked team is the Carpathia Champions. They're currently 116 and 0 this season."
"Well' if they've won 116 times in a row, they must be due for a loss," said Tariel. "Where do we go to sign up?"
"Just go down the hall, to the training room. They'll tell you everything you need to know."
A few minutes later, in the Arena…
A1 Announcer 1
A2 Announcer 2
A1: I'm James Darien.
A2: I'm William Drugaskan. And you're watching ESGN, the worldwide leader in gladiatorial sports.
A1: It's Open Challenge Day here at the Heal-O-Aid Arena, when teams from across the world can bypass the normal qualification procedures and compete directly against the best gladiator team in the world for a chance at fame and, of course, the coveted 250,000 gold piece cash prize!
A2: It's8:04 PM right now, so if the Carpathia Champions can hold out for another 3 hours and 56 minutes, then they will have successfully retained their title as the world's greatest gladiators!
A1: While we're waiting for the gladiators, let's have a brief word from our sponsors. Today's 250,000 gold piece cash prize is sponsored by the Government of Carpathia. For the past 400 years, under the leadership of the wise and benevolent Prince Larethian MCMXCVIII –
A2: No, Jim. It's MCMXCIX. MCMXCVIII got assassinated a couple hours ago.
A1: I'm just reading what it says on the script here. Okay. Under the leadership of the wise and benevolent Prince Larethian MCMXCIX and his predecessors, the Government of Carpathia has made sure that the kingdom's adventurers never run out of evil to fight. And we import maidens from all over the world, so whenever you kill a powerful monster, you can be sure there's a beautiful female just waiting to be rescued. Carpathia. Where everybody lives happily ever after.
A2: Some restrictions may apply. Offer not available in all areas. Maiden availability not guaranteed. Additional surcharges may be required. Tax, title, and license fees additional. 2.9 percent APR available only to most qualified buyers. Additional information –
A1: Enough, William. Now, let's introduce the contestants. First, coming in from the left side of the arena, give a hand for your Carpathia Champions!
Three gladiators entered the arena. In addition to their regular arms and armor, each gladiator was carrying another item. The one on the left was holding aloft a package of six bottles of blue liquid. The one in the middle had a powerful-looking shield. And the one on the right had a weird device that looked like a remote control. However, it also looked almost exactly like the one Tariel and Artalax had found in the package.
A2: According to the rules, each contestant is allowed to bring one item into the arena that has been given to them by their corporate sponsor. First, on the left, give a hand for Joseph Sextius!
A1: Joseph Sextius is sponsored by Heal-O-Aid. Now introducing the new Heal-O-Aid 35-50, with super-powered healing formula for all your adventuring needs. Whether you've been hit by an arrow, slashed by a sword, or poisoned by poison, Heal-O-Aid helps you get back on your feet. Heal-O-Aid 35-50: 35 percent more healing with 50 percent fewer calories!
A2: And our next contestant, Valerian Valinor!
A1: Valerian Valinor is sponsored by Athena Technologies. For thousands of years, Athena Technologies has been proud to provide top-of-the-line weapons and armor to the most worthy heroes. Of course, due to market pressures we've had to redefine "most worthy" as "being able to pay our exorbitantly high prices", but it's about the same thing. Athena Technologies. The patron of heroes.
A2: And for our final contestant, Helkat Norenia!
A1: Helkat Norenia is sponsored by Kalmeth Industries. Here at Kalmeth Industries, we've developed dozens of products all designed to make your life as an adventurer easier. Our latest, and the one Helkat is using today, is the PTD-1000 Personal Teleportation Device! Now, for the first time, you don't have to trudge for days through wilderness to get where you want to go – you can just teleport right into the enemy ambush! The PTD-1000 Personal Teleportation Device from Kalmeth Industries. Spend less time trudging through wilderness, and more time getting shot at!
On the other side, Tariel, Artalax, and Talia entered the arena. The announcers begain to introduce them.
A2: And, on the other side of the arena, our challengers, the Altaria Avengers!
A1: First, give a big round of applause for our first challenger, one of the great Paladins of Altaria: Tariel!
A2: And now let's welcome a second contestant – this one is a wizard: Artalax!
A1: And, finally, the third contestant, this one is a real princess – Princess Talia!
A2: Here's the weird thing, Jim: according to this sheet, none of these contestants even have corporate sponsors! They did have the option to select their sponsors before battle, but for some reason they chose not to.
A1: Yes. They said something about not wanting to sell their souls out to the capitalist system, or something like that. But without the additional support, our challengers are going to have a tough time beating the Champions.
A2: So, will well-intentioned but naïve and misguided idealism win this battle, or will better technology and superior resources prevail, just like they have the last 116 times? There's only one way to find out. Let the battle begin!