Chapter Two – The List
The two girls were sat on a couch in the corner of the coffee shop, away from the ears of the other customers. A lengthy silence followed the end of the small talk until Sarah finally broke it.
"Ok, so the spell I wanna give you is very simple. I've done it loads of times before, but it is binding. You write a list, put everything on it, anything you miss will not happen. You sign the list, making it more like a contract, and everything stays that way until you die."
"Until I die? Why would I die…again?" Buffy tensed visibly.
"No, silly. It's just that when you reach the ripe old age of 147 and pass on from this mortal sphere, you don't need the spell anymore. The universe has enough magic balancing things and holding it together without it being used for unnecessary things, so when a person dies, any spell done for their benefit ends."
"Right, I guess that makes sense." Buffy relaxed again, annoyed at herself for her dumb reaction.
"Ok, I'll need a few strands of your hair to bind the spell to you, and something of Spike's too."
Buffy scanned the café, embarrassed at even hearing Spike's name in relation to her feelings. She searched her pockets and found a note that Spike had written given directions to a demon haunt. She gave it and a few hairs gently pulled from her head to the Wicca.
"Great. All we need now is the list."
Over an hour later, Buffy was still thinking up alterations to make to Spike, while an increasingly bored Sarah wrote them down.
"Ooh wait, I don't want him to watch soaps anymore either!"
Rolling her eyes, Sarah added it to the list.
"Ok, so that must be it. Let me read it back to you… Spike has to have everything that is who he is, looks and personality."
"Yeh, cos I wouldn't want to get Riley in Spike's body!" Buffy snorted at the thought.
"Who's Riley?"
"Doesn't matter."
Sarah sighed with frustration and continued; "He has to be human, have his natural hair colour and a tan. He must keep his super powers and stamina. He must have a nice apartment and car paid for by a legal job. He must get on with the friends and family of Miss Buffy Summers. He must not smoke, drink, swear, letch or make innuendos. He must drop the Big Bad act along with his duster, and be romantic and generous. He must be a good cook. He must give valuable input on clothes, hair and fashion, including dressing better himself. He must not refer to any of his ex girlfriends, and must not call Miss Buffy Summers by any nicknames. He must not be jealous or verbally bash Angel. He must let Miss Buffy Summers drive his car. He must stop calling soccer 'football'. He must listen to chart music, and he must stop with englishisms. Finally, he must not watch soap operas."
"Do you think I've missed anything?"
"NO!!!" Sarah answered quickly, now desperate to escape. "I'll do the spell for you tonight, it may take a while." She said, eyeing the list again.
"I really appreciate this." Buffy said, picking up on her slight negativity.
"I can honestly say that I want to give you this spell more now I know what you're like than I did before." With a sly smile Sarah left the coffee shop, unable to believe the arrogance and brazen selfishness of her former idol.