Chapter Four
Glorfindel half stood, brushing at the droplets of red wine that he had managed to spray all over his robes, the table, and Elrond.
"Great Eru, Glorfindel! You're a thousand Ages old, have managed to die and be reincarnated, and still you choke on your wine like an Elfling at his Day of Majority Eve party!" Elrond sputtered, also standing, slapping away Glorfindel's hands as they tried to wipe the wine droplets off his chest.
"Okay, I absolutely must ask…what is an 'Elfling's Day of Majority Eve party' and what happens there?" she inquired as soon as she stopped snorting at Glorfindel's reaction.
"Nothing that a Lady would be interested in hearing about, I assure you!" Glorfindel asserted, his ears tingeing pink.
"My Lord Glorfindel, need I remind you that this particular 'Lady' once wrote about your Elfhood as being proud, erect, and so hard that it could split a tree trunk into kindling?" she said, lifting an eyebrow at the golden haired warrior. She crossed her arms over her chest, watching his face turn crimson. This 'not-suitable-for-a-lady's-virginal-ears-thing' that Glorfindel and Elrond had going needed to stop immediately, or she'd never learn anything worthwhile during her stay. "The same Lady who wrote about a certain Balrog Slayer and a certain Lord of Imladris having a rather steamy encounter in a hot spring…in great detail, as I recall. Would you like to hear a quote from that story to refresh your memory?"
"NO!" Elrond and Glorfindel shouted together, staring down at their visitor. She merely smiled sweetly at the two Lords, gesturing for them to reseat themselves.
Sighing, Elrond, trying to contain his blush and failing miserably, said, "Whenever an Elfling reached his age of Majority we would have a ceremony…it was a very dignified, somber, and momentous occasion in a young Elf's life…"
"But the night before his ceremony," Glorfindel continued, finally finding his tongue and the courage to use it, "a group of his Elders…usually fathers, brothers, uncles, and some of-age close friends, would "elf-nap" him from his bed and take him out for…"
"…a night of drinking, carousing and merrymaking!" finished a pair of new voices from the door.
Turning, she was startled by the pair of bookends standing just inside the bedroom door. The two dark-haired twins were identical, from their long ebony tresses to their soft suede-encased feet…identically tall, identically broad-shouldered, and identically devastatingly handsome.
"I remember our Majority Eve as if it were yesterday!" One of them laughed, elbowing the other in the ribs. "Ada brought us to that pub near the waterfall…do you remember, 'Ro?"
"Yes! I remember Glorfindel dancing naked on the table, while Erestor tried to stuff gold coins up his…"
"THAT IS QUITE ENOUGH!" Elrond bellowed, slamming his fist on the table.
She grinned broadly at the twins, who grinned back, completely regardless of Elrond's little tantrum, or the steam coming out of Glorfindel's ears.
"Milady, may I introduce my pretentious sons, Elladan and Elrohir, whose tongues seem to wag without discretion," Elrond continued in a more subdued voice, but with a look that screamed 'WARNING - BEHAVE YOURSELVES" to the twins.
"I've been looking forward to meeting you two," she said, as they came forward into the room. "I hear that you were the ones to discover the Internet, the fanfictions, and the Yahoo groups."
"Guilty!" Elladan laughed, lifting her hand and brushing his lips against her knuckles.
"Of that and everything else that's ever gone awry in Arda and Valinor…" Glorfindel muttered under his breath, frowning at the cavalier behavior of the Peredhil twin.
Not to be outdone, Elrohir stepped forward, also brushing his lips against her hand, giving her a half bow as well. "And you must be the woman who's been feeding our egos by writing those stories!"
She smiled, already liking these two. "Guilty - at least of being one of those writers!" she answered, the three of them laughing.
"Elrond, can you not do something about them? They encourage her and each other to be hopelessly vulgar," Glorfindel sniffed.
"I am sorry, Glorfindel…I thought you were a warrior…" she said, looking confused at the Balrog-Slayer.
"I was. I am!" he replied haughtily, sitting up taller in his seat and turning his turquoise eyes on her.
"Then surely you must be jaded enough for a little bawdy banter not to bother you so much…"
"I am not used to a Lady speaking so lightly of such matters," Glorfindel replied, narrowing his eyes. "As a matter of fact, I am not used to a Lady speaking of such matters at all!"
"Well, get used to it. This Lady does almost nothing but speak of such matters. And read about such matters. And write about such matters…and…"
"Point taken," Glorfindel finally ceded, holding up his hand stopping her from saying anything else. He sighed and shook his golden head.
"Would you like to see our computer? It's a Mac…G5…" Elladan enticed, reaching to pull her from her seat.
"Oh, no… she is going to rest, and then we are going to have a civilized dinner. After that, she may visit the computer room, if she so desires," Elrond stated, shooing the twins away from the table.
He stood, as did Glorfindel, both bowing to their visitor. "I'm sure you'll enjoy dinner…these two will be there - unfortunately - but so will the rest of the Elves. You'll get to meet everyone else and ask all the questions you desire."
Glorfindel grimaced, thinking of Galadriel and Celebrian's reactions to the bold and saucy maiden they'd brought to Valinor. He was certain that it would not be pretty.