Pride Land Information Source

The Television Show of all the 'True'

Aspects of the Pride Lands- Many

Faces: Skinny to Scarred

MORE REVIEWS!!! YAY! KEEP 'EM COMIN', READERS!

Disclaimer :: I think you like Seneerie enough to know that she's mine... and everyone else in this chappie is mine too. Except if Scar counts.

Notes :: Yay! I get to do an interview with the two most classic of my odd lionesses... SENEERIE AND SINISTRESS!!! Yay! Anyway... I hope you liked the last chappie... did you catch on to the part about The Madness? Probably not, but someday... someday you'll thank me. Poor Seneerie with her little... oh well. And also, you bet I'll get to ones once Simba and Mufasa are 'dead'! They'll probably be pretty funny too, what with Seneerie's crush on Mufasa and her inability to see anything wrong with Scar...

We fade into classic different wacky 'Pride Land Information Source' signs, as traditional theme plays

Seneerie (our host): singing; tune is similar to that of 'Home on the Range'... the original, not the Disney song. A little too many words in some of the phrases...

Oh... the work was hard

and the pay was bad

and the way here was quite bor-ing

But on the way here

We see quite the advertisement

And that really got us lur-ing

So....

tune now similar to 'We're Gonna Take a Walk Outside Today'; if you've seen The Adventures of Milo and Otis you'll understand

If you're really bored and want to do something

Then at this show all your bells will ring

Yeah, if you're really bored and want to do something

Then at this show all your bells will ring

It's a really weird world and a good one too

for the stupid bums and the ones in the loo

Yeah, it's a really weird world and a good one too

for the stupid bums and the ones in the loo!

we now switch to a dome-like room, made of rock. In the middle is a polished rectangular table with two seats across from each other. In one of the two seats is a cream colored lioness; probably around Kiara's age at her time. The lioness is sitting like a lion, except her paws are on the table. This is Seneerie; who you might wonder how she holds herself up; she's so thin. She has been running this show for a matter of 5 1/2 years. On each side of the table is a microphone on a tiny stand with a long cord that seems to lead to nowhere.

Seneerie: pops a pain reliever in her mouth; swallows what seems to be about a quart of water Hello viewers! I'm back from my nice vacation in prison!

blank stares

Seneerie: Yyyeah, I got arrested for Queen Abuse.

amid "ooooohhhhhh" from the crowd

Seneerie: And so, I thought today we'd interview another lioness who's been arrested for similar crimes... all welcome SINISTRESS!!!

Jeopardy music, Seneerie is attempting not to shout

Seneerie: Do I really have to go through this again? I do this every time! Besides, Scar told me that you should never shout until it's been at least ten minutes since you took your last pain reliever... don't ask me why.

Sinistress; a tan colored lioness with steel colored eyes and an evil look on her face; decorative scarring all over her face; storms in and bitterly sits across from Seneerie

Seneerie: Don't worry Sinistress... I took enough pain relievers that there is NO WAY you can hurt me.

Sinistress: nastily Shut up!

Seneerie: Oh, not very friendly?

Sinistress: WHO are we talking about now?

Seneerie: WHAT? Stop it, Sinistress!

Sinistress growls

Seneerie: backing off in fear Okay, I'm sorry. brightens So... my first question is: Who are you?

Sinistress: I'm the proud daughter of Evillo and Darkney. Why do you care?

Seneerie: Ah, thank you Sinistress. Now... how long have you lived in the Pride Lands?

Sinistress: Why should I tell you? Well, if you must know, I moved here a little over a year ago.

Seneerie: blank stare Moved? What's moving?

Sinistress: Gee... you really are thick. It's when you leave one place and come to another. Duh.

Seneerie: Well soh-rry!

Sinistress growls

Seneerie: mocking Sinistress "Grr..." That's a good growl you got there.

Sinistress: Don't pretend you care.

Seneerie: Blah blah blah. So Sinniepoo... why did you "move" here?

Sinistress: There was more food, a better economy, a better life here. Why not?

Seneerie: glares Because since you moved here, there's not been much room for ME. I've been here WAY longer than YOU!

Sinistress: Ya wanna make som'm of it, SENEERIE?

Seneerie: YEAH!

Seneerie tackles Sinistress; guess she can support her own weight; and Sinistress throws her against a wall

Seneerie: Ooowww!!

Sinistress is clearly not finished; she dives toward Seneerie and soon tears much blood from her body... guh-ross

Seneerie: YYEEE- Aughh!

Seneerie manages to pick herself up and staggers back to her table; she has a black eye and is smothered with blood

Seneerie: calmly My next question is... angrily WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO ME? I THOUGHT THE PAIN RELIEVERS WOULD BE ENOUGH, BUT APPARENTLY NOT!!

Sinistress grins evilly

Sinistress: You looked pretty fun to sink my teeth into.

Seneerie: ignoring Sinistress Slaves? Call in for a pizza. I don't know how long this is gonna get.

Sinistress: And remember to give me the pizza.

Seneerie: Nuh nuh no, it's for me.

Sinistress: Why you little...

Seneerie faints in fear, getting blood all over the floor

Cameraman James: Whoop! Looks like you don't need to order a pizza afterall! That ends that episode, regardless of how stupid it is!

The Closest We Can Get to the End Without Seeing the Animals Pamper Seneeerie; and Getting to See Sinistress Enjoy a Pizza